[Col. Tigh]

Are there two kinds of "lesbians?" And do former lesbians make "keepers" who stay married longer than carousel-riding straight women?

I call to mind Chirlane McCray, the wife of New York City mayor Bill De Blasio, who wrote an essay published by Essence magazine in 1979 about her coming out as a lesbian. Some years later, she married De Blasio and had two children:
   

I also came across this article from 2010, by a British woman who used to be a lesbian but is now married with four children. Here she was with her first girlfriend:
   

And more recently:
   

Some gems from this woman's observations about lesbians:

Quote:

From 1988 until 2000 I lived in lesbian households, drank in lesbian pubs, went on gay rights marches and viewed my long-term future as being exclusively with women.

What turned her off, unsurprisingly, is the endless verbiage and baseless jealousy that women seem unable to avoid:

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The sheer amount of talking and analysing that went on was exhausting. The women I went out with were by and large more inclined to be insecure and to need reassurance and I found myself in the male role of endlessly reassuring my girlfriends. The subtle mood changes of everyday life would be picked over inexhaustibly.
One girlfriend was so insecure that every single time we enjoyed a night out - usually at a bar - we would have a row and have to leave. She would convince herself that I was flirting with another woman and, however much I tried not to catch anyone's eye, she wouldn't believe me.
Back home, we would then spend the next four hours arguing about our relationship and my feelings of loyalty, fidelity and so on. It was never-ending. It may sound prosaic but when you add female hormones into the mix, the problems are even worse.

But even after a dozen years in the lesbian role, she needed the masculinity that only a male can provide:

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Unlike most men, women, of course, offer each other endless support and there's hardly ever any lack of communication.
But - bizarre as it may seem - I found myself longing for exactly the opposite. I wanted a bit more difference, a little less talking and a bit more edge and my relationships often paid the price.

And about the plasticity of female sexuality:

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I repeat, I know many people are totally convinced that they are born gay and have absolutely no choice over their sexual orientation.
All I can say is that I believe not every gay person is gay for life. In particular, I believe that many women are capable of feeling attracted to other women - to be with someone who believes it's perfectly normal to talk about how you feel and wants to know every single thought that passes through your head.

I believe she is correct. It is natural for women to feel attraction to both men and women, but only a portion are "born gay"--usually the "butch" types, a.k.a. bull dykes. The "femmes" are simply enjoying a lark, and more often than not, end up with a man.

At the same time, it seems that women who tried out lesbianism--instead of riding the cock carousel--are not damaged by it in the same way. In fact, once they get married and have children with a man, they seem to stay married for good.