Quote: (03-13-2014 12:16 AM)soup Wrote:
Since you are a player you've already assessed the entire room within seconds of walking in, and two guys staring at the girls across the bar doesn't help the cause. Do you don't look, and you change the discussion topic with your friend. It's obvious that he's nervous, so I think that's the best move.
Yeah that's definitely a frustrating non-gamer buddy situation, another one in the same vein: when you talk to a group of girls early on, you sense that it's going nowhere and the approach dies, but then your buddy gets tunnel vision all night and keeps looking out for those same girls instead of new ones. It's led to some awkward situations where the girls and us will bounce around the same neighborhood and end up in the same bar later, and my friend has stubbornly gone to re-approach them. Distraction is the only answer, I've never seen anything good come of pursuing in that situation.
There are two main problems I've ran into with going out with non-gamer/less-than-suave friends, and here's how I damage control them:
1. Logistics: both carpooling and pregaming lead to bad situations. If I drive down with friends I feel obligated to get them back in one piece, and anytime I've joined them for a pre-drink at an apartment it swiftly goes from a quick let's-have-a-shot to an hour long affair, and I start the night both later and drunker than is effective. And of course, if I have to head back in the group (or worse yet DD them back) then there's no chance of pulling end of the night.
If I want a chance of picking up while out with those friends, I start the night as if I were solo and try to get to the bar a good half hour before they arrive. Something about walking into the bar on my own gets me in the right mindset, and I'm then comfortable going my own way after hitting it off with a girl. At this point my friends know that I'll be in and out, and that if I disappear by the end of the night it's nothing personal.
2. Obligatory wingmanship: a big pet peeve of mine is when I'd approach, get a solid start, and then a clueless buddy would barge in and insist on being introduced. It's killed quite a few approaches, especially when said friend has drank too much or otherwise came across sloppy.
This is one where I always set expectations...I tell friends before the night gets going that if i'm talking to girls, I'll bring them in if I see a good opportunity to introduce them and otherwise give me time to work. Like the first issue my usual friends expect this now, though times when I make insta-friends on a solo night I'm reminded how many guys out there will do this naturally (and obnoxiously)