I've had this post in mind for a while.
This is a culmination of observations I have made over a good estimate of 40-60 club nights since I started actively doing night game. This is the hardest I've thought about game since I became involved in it. This is a long post, I'd appreciate if you could bear with me on this one, the key points are in bold in case you're just looking to skim first and form an initial impression.
Over the course all these nights out this year I've noticed a similar trend. Girls go out at night and are satisfied by either fun, or result. Men on the other hand, aim for the result, but can enjoy the fun as well. The focus of this post will be my personal theory on the progression of a man's night game as he ages. I have made these conclusions so far mainly after my own progress, and having been out consistently with some quality guys of different ages. Also from following the progress of members on RVF and the game community in general. I have been 100% sober on at least 90% of these nights, since most of my game is sober game, allowing me to make clear and accurate observations.
First, I want to give my personal definition of fun and result that I will refer to.
Fun for a man's perspective is approaching attractive girls and finding them receptive, making them smile and visibly adding to their fun and enjoyment, dancing and spinning and picking girls up, brief and intense make outs, and so forth. Also includes things you do for self-amusement and screwing around with your buddies.
Result is a pull. Not necessarily a bang, as maybe you pulled a girl home or went to her house and weren't able to get past resistance. A bang is obviously the result you aim for and are satisfied with.
Since the main intent of night game is to get same night lays, I am not considering number closes as a result.
I am finding it difficult to get one of my points across directly, but if I were to try and summarize it in a sentence: To what extent should you enjoy and feel satisfaction from night game due to fun and not results?
This will be different for the younger guys such as myself, so I feel this is a question younger guys might encounter, and this is a question the older and more experienced guys might be able to shed light to.
It's important to note this process I run through is heavily focused on dance floor game I've internalized from different people (Samseau's guide has been instrumental). To be specific, the 'night game' I am referring to here is including but not exclusive to dance floor game. The focus here is on higher energy night game environments, which we know is the typical spot that the young, energetic girls we love tend to gather in high numbers on nights out.
For example purposes, here is how my typical night plays out:
- Arrive at club, either early or just before peak time. Enjoy the music and talk with one or two buddies I am out with.
- Once dancing starts and dance floor starts to get busy, I make my way and break off dancing and approach girls. At first it is usually girls that are receptive to me, such as giving me looks
- Dance with cute girl, spin her pick her up make her laugh, go for make out (if not completed just reattempt process 10 seconds later by approaching another cute girl)
- Once makeout, just pace it, play with tension, keep dancing varied, make out a bit more and try and physically escalate (at this point friends may intervene and I lose bang prospects)
- If friends didn't intervene or if I succeeded in keeping her with me, I start to think about a pull. Exchange some small talk, such as names, but nothing much. Comfort isn't as necessary in night game as emotional engagement and arousal, I find. Consider logistics.
- Try a pull. If not successful, start with another approach.
This is a cycle that plays out every single time at clubs for me. And although it's mentally and physically draining, its a hell lot of fun. Although I have the end goal in mind (the pull), the process itself is extremely exciting.
My buddy describes this process as giving value to girls. I've learned a lot from him and he's had much more success than me in terms of fun and results due to longer exposure and hard-earned game. He enjoys the process as well because you are essentially becoming a part of the girl's fantasy. You are adding to her night.
All those other chumps at the club cannot compete with you. You are able to push her emotional buttons. Mainly through dance game and high energy.
How do we give value to these girls? It's literally insane how much fun we give to these girls by bringing them into our realities. It's evident they have never (in most cases) been taken on such an experience before. They scream, shout, smile, and get aroused. It's important to note the focus of my approaches are girls 18-low 20's, so generally college girls, who although get lots of male attention at parties and everywhere on campus, lack quality and alpha attention at clubs. I'm making this statement of course based on the fact most guys in the clubs are chodes. Whenever I look around in the packed club crowd and I see a girl towering above everyone else, being spun in the air, I search through and find out it's my cousin or buddy that is picking her up. We give value to these girls by taking them on the emotional roller coasters they desire. For sharing that feminine energy and their sexual attractiveness with us, we give back the alpha attention and exciting attitude they crave.
Girls enjoy the night for what occurs. A fun dance with an attractive guy, catching up with her friends and getting drunk together and not meeting any guys, singing out loud and showing off her sexuality, sex with an alpha guy. From what I can see, these girls are almost never going out primarily to find someone to fuck. It 'just happens' as they like to say it, or the hamster if you will.
Furthermore, here is where I believe there is a distinction between young guys and older, more experienced guys in the game. For example purposes, young guys being around 25 or younger, older guys around 25 or greater.
Young guys have insane amounts of energy, and are able to approach in insane numbers. Young guys look for, and get satisfaction and validation from attracting and making out with girls in the club. Although we obviously want to take the girls home and have sex, we are satisfied enough by making out with that 5'7 blonde in heels with a tight blue dress, long, thin legs and firm ass.
Older guys, don't approach as much. They have less energy and tolerance for attitude. They don't waste time looking to add fun to a girl's night, although they enjoy it, they won't go out of their way to do it like young guys might. Despite this, their pull rate is much higher, and is usually higher quality girls than the ones young guys do pull, when they pull. They are more accurate, and precise due to tighter game. Girls are more strongly attracted and aroused by them.
They have a hunch and know how to better approach situations and pick out the most receptive situations. They waste less energy in the approaches they actually do, with higher likelihood of converting. It's not that older guys don't get satisfaction or validation from getting just make outs from cute girls, it's that they've done that enough in their younger days that the thrill of it is not the same. They would rather just cut to the chase and aim solely for the bang.
This is considering of course, guys with game. There's no use comparing an older guy who has never cold approached in his life to a young guy who does approach, because it's obvious who has the edge.
I guess an extension of the point I am trying to make here is that older guys with game will always do better than younger guys with game, in a night club game scenario.
Now comparing how guys see nights out to girls, it's going to be very different. Older guys, although they can have fun on nights out, primarily go for the result. The bang. They are much better than younger guys at succeeding, but they might not enjoy the night as much if they do not get a bang as a young guy would enjoy the night.
Young guys can enjoy the night regardless. But to a certain extent.
As we all know, game isn't consistent. You can pull 3 new girls over a long weekend and get 3 new notches but then suddenly go months without a new bang.
To what extent can young guys rely on fun, rather than result? This is a question I ask myself at a time of 'game inconsistency'.
It's no doubt I can have an insane amount of fun, but at times I wonder how much it's worth it when the result can be hard to come by. The hardest part of it all is the mental fatigue. High approach numbers, high rejection rates, lots of make outs that don't convert to anything can take it's toll on you. Older guys might not get worn out as much mentally as young guys. They will go out less and approach less, and pull more.
You can argue that overtime this builds core confidence. A few years of consistent night game grinding by a young guy will yield thousands of approaches, hundreds of make outs, and anywhere from very few to dozens of bangs. It is however a draining process.
But maybe it is an essential one.
Maybe it's the answer to why older guys are so accurate with their approaches? They have less energy and are not willing to waste time trying to make out with all the girls in the club like a young guy (as that is child's play to them), but they have competence and much higher results than a younger guy, due to tighter game resulting from all that time they spent grinding their skills.
Is the answer as a young guy to just enjoy the fun times and not worry too much about how often the result times come? With the goal being that one day you will have the competence to produce the results with higher consistency, and you have the option to have fun while you're at it too.
This is my longest and most thought out post yet on this forum. I'm looking to see if there are other young guys that share my perspective, but mainly to hear the thoughts and opinions of the veterans; the guy's that have been in the game for many years, and have done the grind and have game accolades to show for as a result.
This is a culmination of observations I have made over a good estimate of 40-60 club nights since I started actively doing night game. This is the hardest I've thought about game since I became involved in it. This is a long post, I'd appreciate if you could bear with me on this one, the key points are in bold in case you're just looking to skim first and form an initial impression.
Over the course all these nights out this year I've noticed a similar trend. Girls go out at night and are satisfied by either fun, or result. Men on the other hand, aim for the result, but can enjoy the fun as well. The focus of this post will be my personal theory on the progression of a man's night game as he ages. I have made these conclusions so far mainly after my own progress, and having been out consistently with some quality guys of different ages. Also from following the progress of members on RVF and the game community in general. I have been 100% sober on at least 90% of these nights, since most of my game is sober game, allowing me to make clear and accurate observations.
First, I want to give my personal definition of fun and result that I will refer to.
Fun for a man's perspective is approaching attractive girls and finding them receptive, making them smile and visibly adding to their fun and enjoyment, dancing and spinning and picking girls up, brief and intense make outs, and so forth. Also includes things you do for self-amusement and screwing around with your buddies.
Result is a pull. Not necessarily a bang, as maybe you pulled a girl home or went to her house and weren't able to get past resistance. A bang is obviously the result you aim for and are satisfied with.
Since the main intent of night game is to get same night lays, I am not considering number closes as a result.
I am finding it difficult to get one of my points across directly, but if I were to try and summarize it in a sentence: To what extent should you enjoy and feel satisfaction from night game due to fun and not results?
This will be different for the younger guys such as myself, so I feel this is a question younger guys might encounter, and this is a question the older and more experienced guys might be able to shed light to.
It's important to note this process I run through is heavily focused on dance floor game I've internalized from different people (Samseau's guide has been instrumental). To be specific, the 'night game' I am referring to here is including but not exclusive to dance floor game. The focus here is on higher energy night game environments, which we know is the typical spot that the young, energetic girls we love tend to gather in high numbers on nights out.
For example purposes, here is how my typical night plays out:
- Arrive at club, either early or just before peak time. Enjoy the music and talk with one or two buddies I am out with.
- Once dancing starts and dance floor starts to get busy, I make my way and break off dancing and approach girls. At first it is usually girls that are receptive to me, such as giving me looks
- Dance with cute girl, spin her pick her up make her laugh, go for make out (if not completed just reattempt process 10 seconds later by approaching another cute girl)
- Once makeout, just pace it, play with tension, keep dancing varied, make out a bit more and try and physically escalate (at this point friends may intervene and I lose bang prospects)
- If friends didn't intervene or if I succeeded in keeping her with me, I start to think about a pull. Exchange some small talk, such as names, but nothing much. Comfort isn't as necessary in night game as emotional engagement and arousal, I find. Consider logistics.
- Try a pull. If not successful, start with another approach.
This is a cycle that plays out every single time at clubs for me. And although it's mentally and physically draining, its a hell lot of fun. Although I have the end goal in mind (the pull), the process itself is extremely exciting.
My buddy describes this process as giving value to girls. I've learned a lot from him and he's had much more success than me in terms of fun and results due to longer exposure and hard-earned game. He enjoys the process as well because you are essentially becoming a part of the girl's fantasy. You are adding to her night.
All those other chumps at the club cannot compete with you. You are able to push her emotional buttons. Mainly through dance game and high energy.
How do we give value to these girls? It's literally insane how much fun we give to these girls by bringing them into our realities. It's evident they have never (in most cases) been taken on such an experience before. They scream, shout, smile, and get aroused. It's important to note the focus of my approaches are girls 18-low 20's, so generally college girls, who although get lots of male attention at parties and everywhere on campus, lack quality and alpha attention at clubs. I'm making this statement of course based on the fact most guys in the clubs are chodes. Whenever I look around in the packed club crowd and I see a girl towering above everyone else, being spun in the air, I search through and find out it's my cousin or buddy that is picking her up. We give value to these girls by taking them on the emotional roller coasters they desire. For sharing that feminine energy and their sexual attractiveness with us, we give back the alpha attention and exciting attitude they crave.
Girls enjoy the night for what occurs. A fun dance with an attractive guy, catching up with her friends and getting drunk together and not meeting any guys, singing out loud and showing off her sexuality, sex with an alpha guy. From what I can see, these girls are almost never going out primarily to find someone to fuck. It 'just happens' as they like to say it, or the hamster if you will.
Furthermore, here is where I believe there is a distinction between young guys and older, more experienced guys in the game. For example purposes, young guys being around 25 or younger, older guys around 25 or greater.
Young guys have insane amounts of energy, and are able to approach in insane numbers. Young guys look for, and get satisfaction and validation from attracting and making out with girls in the club. Although we obviously want to take the girls home and have sex, we are satisfied enough by making out with that 5'7 blonde in heels with a tight blue dress, long, thin legs and firm ass.
Older guys, don't approach as much. They have less energy and tolerance for attitude. They don't waste time looking to add fun to a girl's night, although they enjoy it, they won't go out of their way to do it like young guys might. Despite this, their pull rate is much higher, and is usually higher quality girls than the ones young guys do pull, when they pull. They are more accurate, and precise due to tighter game. Girls are more strongly attracted and aroused by them.
They have a hunch and know how to better approach situations and pick out the most receptive situations. They waste less energy in the approaches they actually do, with higher likelihood of converting. It's not that older guys don't get satisfaction or validation from getting just make outs from cute girls, it's that they've done that enough in their younger days that the thrill of it is not the same. They would rather just cut to the chase and aim solely for the bang.
This is considering of course, guys with game. There's no use comparing an older guy who has never cold approached in his life to a young guy who does approach, because it's obvious who has the edge.
I guess an extension of the point I am trying to make here is that older guys with game will always do better than younger guys with game, in a night club game scenario.
Now comparing how guys see nights out to girls, it's going to be very different. Older guys, although they can have fun on nights out, primarily go for the result. The bang. They are much better than younger guys at succeeding, but they might not enjoy the night as much if they do not get a bang as a young guy would enjoy the night.
Young guys can enjoy the night regardless. But to a certain extent.
As we all know, game isn't consistent. You can pull 3 new girls over a long weekend and get 3 new notches but then suddenly go months without a new bang.
To what extent can young guys rely on fun, rather than result? This is a question I ask myself at a time of 'game inconsistency'.
It's no doubt I can have an insane amount of fun, but at times I wonder how much it's worth it when the result can be hard to come by. The hardest part of it all is the mental fatigue. High approach numbers, high rejection rates, lots of make outs that don't convert to anything can take it's toll on you. Older guys might not get worn out as much mentally as young guys. They will go out less and approach less, and pull more.
You can argue that overtime this builds core confidence. A few years of consistent night game grinding by a young guy will yield thousands of approaches, hundreds of make outs, and anywhere from very few to dozens of bangs. It is however a draining process.
But maybe it is an essential one.
Maybe it's the answer to why older guys are so accurate with their approaches? They have less energy and are not willing to waste time trying to make out with all the girls in the club like a young guy (as that is child's play to them), but they have competence and much higher results than a younger guy, due to tighter game resulting from all that time they spent grinding their skills.
Is the answer as a young guy to just enjoy the fun times and not worry too much about how often the result times come? With the goal being that one day you will have the competence to produce the results with higher consistency, and you have the option to have fun while you're at it too.
This is my longest and most thought out post yet on this forum. I'm looking to see if there are other young guys that share my perspective, but mainly to hear the thoughts and opinions of the veterans; the guy's that have been in the game for many years, and have done the grind and have game accolades to show for as a result.