Quote: (05-29-2013 12:43 PM)cardguy Wrote:
Hey everyone,
Just curious. I have yet to suffer the loss of a parent. But - I am wondering what such a feeling is like?
Is it something you can prepare for? I'm guessing not.
And how difficult is it to carry on with life. To be honest - I am surprised more people don't commit suicide when this happens. Since many people seem to kill themselves over far less traumatic events. Indeed - it was the death of his mother - which led (fashion designer) Alexander McQueen to kill himself.
I'm guessing religion must be a comfort. But that won't help me since I am an atheist.
Anyway - I know it is a bleak question. But I literally have no idea how people are able to cope with such events. Which is strange since it will eventually happen to most of us.
Also - does it get easier to deal with when you go through it as an adult? As opposed to when you are younger?
Lastly - when one parent dies. Does it change the relationship (in some subtle way) you have with the remaining one? I would imagine it does. Yet - it is a bit surreal to imagine hanging out with one parent after the other one has died.
Sorry if the above is a bit dumb. It is just that I often find myself thinking about the simplest and most basic questions.
I think the most important thing is to not do anything too stupid, i.e. start taking unnecessary risks, suicide, etc (not that this is a huge issue, but you never know). Other than that, putting time between you and the situation is about it. It's going to suck, really really bad, especially if you were close. Hopefully you have siblings that will help out with final arrangements (funeral, burial, and then estate related issues). Spend time with whatever family is left. Ask questions - find out about how they were when they were young, keep a small collection of their personal items, stuff that reminds you of them. You would be amazed what stories their friends/siblings/whomever can tell you that reveal more about them than you ever knew.
Again, no real magic bullet on this one. Just let time do its thing.