Quote: (05-19-2013 11:22 PM)OlympusSquared Wrote:expressing intentions is fine but with those shy/insecure girls there is a catch. instead of attracting them hard and trying to do superman level of performance the game is more about 1) getting them comfortable with you and open for seduction and 2) constant reassurance that they're ok and that everything is fine.
My general maxim with girls is 'make your intentions known' ... in other words, if your sexually interested in them, make that clear from the get go...
Even though the general advice on this forum is escalate as quickly as possible, I've noticed most of my hookups come on round two three, and not the first date. This is partially do to being a normal human being with a busy life, and partially living in a city that is somewhat small (150K).
Quote: (05-19-2013 11:22 PM)OlympusSquared Wrote:you can't be aloof with shy girls cause nothing will happen then. just lead and express a lot of empathy towards her..
1) Is it really better to go for the kill on the first encounter/date, or should the goal here be to come off as interesting, cool, and physically attractive... and also aloof. Why give the girl the instant gratification of trying to hook up with her? Stepping back from full throttle and making the girl wonder how she came off, and then rewarding her a few days later with another invite to join your company.
- if i come across as too intense/confident just let me know it's the way i was raised
- don't worry we're adults we won't do anything we're not comfortable with
- i feel good around you
- i thing your shyness is cute i find it very attractive
- if you're nervous let me know i want you to have a good time with me
- etc
Quote: (05-19-2013 11:22 PM)OlympusSquared Wrote:
2) Per topic of the thread.. how do handle girls that put out the conservative, sexually uptight vibe. I've found it true that even the most straight laced boring chicks are freaks when you get them in bed... but the process I'm pretty sure is different.
- express your standards. say 'slutty girls are such a turn off. i hate those. i love that you're not'. it makes her believe you don't fuck randoms and that she is not a random slut. it deepens the connection.
- make intimacy special. say 'i feel this incredible connection with you. i don't know what i'm doing'. when she asks why tell her 'i don't know its a feeling, don't you feel it?'
- object first. before you even end up in private place. say 'i don't sleep with girls on 1st date i can only kiss a bit, just so you know' and make pinky promise.
- get her hot by building sexual tension, not by escalating physically. so things like strong deep eye contact. listening instead of talking and looking at her in ambiguous way. speaking slow [do they call it "bedroom voice"?]. getting really close but not kissing. gentle touching almost like romantic caressing for example hands. creating silent moments when tension shoots through the roof. it should get her hot inside. keep doing that. she will resist by trying to break it but persist. play around with that until you notice she's losing it. 'i'm so lost in the moment with you'.
- future projections. tell her you want to hang out with her a lot in next following days/weeks [because of connection] when you will and go see xxx etc and make amazing love etc so you can making love now is no big
deal thing since you can see all the dates ahead of you.
- baby step it. escalate and still reassure that nothing will happen. kiss and say 'nothing more'. when she's get carried away with kissing be more passionate. start slowly undressing but still don't go all out. kiss her belly arms and say 'we shouldn't do it. you're so tasty'. then more smooching. then 'don't worry nothing will happen'. stuff like that. thing heating up water with frog in it. don't rush. 2 steps forward 1 step back
- lead. when she starts to go with the flow tell her what to do. tell her to kiss you now and here, to take off underwear, etc.