[thegmanifesto]

Quote:

5. The Climate: Recently we’ve had quite incredible weather, but in general D.C. is pretty miserable from November through mid-March. That means that about four to five months each year, people in our area are super pale and wear bulky jackets to bundle up. I can only speak for myself, but I find ghost-white skin pretty unattractive and I think bulky jackets are really unattractive.


4. The (Lack Of) Fashion: Quite simply, the people of D.C. don’t have any. There are two radically different types of people in D.C. when it comes to fashion: People who go way over the top, like socialites or Hill-heads and people who just don’t give a shit, like hipsters or Occupy D.C. protestors. The over the top people are funny because they always look like they are headed to a Great Gatsby theme party. These people somehow think that pink pocket-handkerchiefs and initial-emblazoned cuffs are in. The people on the other end of the spectrum are equally funny because they wear the same crappy jean shorts and small rotation of vintage tees on a daily basis. They think that a faded shirt that features a soda logo is sexy.

3. No Beach In Sight: This reason somewhat coincides with the climate factor. People who live in cities with beaches nearby are determined to stay in shape year round. We don’t have a beach in our backyard, so gym motivation is sometimes lacking. The closest thing D.C. has to a beach is the Georgetown Waterfront in the summer time, when those fat old guys dock their fancy boats in front of Tony and Joes and try to talk young girls into joining their Spring Break fiesta. Not exactly what I call paradise.

2. We’re Too Job Focused: The stress levels of jobs in the District cannot be denied. Some people are dealing with super important things at work, and everyone else thinks they are dealing with super important things at work—even if they aren’t. High stress jobs leads to eating crappy food, drinking way too much, and not really having too much time to get pretty.

1. It’s A Cycle: This might be the most disturbing potential reason why the D.C. population is so ugly. Any beautiful people who come to D.C. won’t actually stay in D.C. long-term because they realize fairly quickly that we are an ugly city. Those people take their talents to metropolises with other beautiful people where they can fit in, places like New York, L.A., or Miami. As these beautiful people migrate to other cities, D.C.’s beautiful people population becomes smaller and smaller, leaving us with mostly average looking people. Those average looking people who remain in D.C. will then mate with each other to create a new generation of average-looking D.C. residents. It’s a cycle of ugliness, really…and there’s no end in sight.

http://nationalshitlist.com/dc/2012/03/1...ly-people/

Accurate?

Discuss.