I tend to be excitable, but have helped along how the years mellow me by trying to notice this constant: every time something truly horrible happens to me, I seem to always find some sort of workaround, eventually. So that from the moment that something bad happens until the moment I know what to do about it, I can let myself relax a bit and "don't sweat the small stuff", because every time I sweated in the past it was always a waste of sweat.
I work best under pressure, so I never want to remove all of it. I actually thrive under tension, and seem to even enjoy it a bit. But if there is too much tension my productivity drops. So sometimes I realize that the worst thing that can happen is that I die, and if I can't stop that then I have to really just let it go anyway.
The stress of worry is a sort of mental addiction. It's actually a useful drug in small doses, but you have to moderate your intake. When anxiety causes a negative feedback loop for me that I can't get out from, I take some valium. I rarely need it, but that cuts right through the worst of distress and allows a clean reboot.
A long period of unsolvable crisis can also lead to feeling depressed, and that is the opposite attitude to the confident, in charge, high T masculine male. It gets harder to find balance from that point without actually solving the problem, and so for me I just use the depression and brooding and anxiety to wring every last resource of attention out of me to put to bear to solving the problem until it's done - damn the rest of the world - just get that one thing fixed.
But then when it's fixed, I flash back again to thinking: "See? It always works out in the end." But to be truthful, without the stress to motivate me, often times it wouldn't have worked out in the end.
I work best under pressure, so I never want to remove all of it. I actually thrive under tension, and seem to even enjoy it a bit. But if there is too much tension my productivity drops. So sometimes I realize that the worst thing that can happen is that I die, and if I can't stop that then I have to really just let it go anyway.
The stress of worry is a sort of mental addiction. It's actually a useful drug in small doses, but you have to moderate your intake. When anxiety causes a negative feedback loop for me that I can't get out from, I take some valium. I rarely need it, but that cuts right through the worst of distress and allows a clean reboot.
A long period of unsolvable crisis can also lead to feeling depressed, and that is the opposite attitude to the confident, in charge, high T masculine male. It gets harder to find balance from that point without actually solving the problem, and so for me I just use the depression and brooding and anxiety to wring every last resource of attention out of me to put to bear to solving the problem until it's done - damn the rest of the world - just get that one thing fixed.
But then when it's fixed, I flash back again to thinking: "See? It always works out in the end." But to be truthful, without the stress to motivate me, often times it wouldn't have worked out in the end.