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Mind in the gutter .
#1

Mind in the gutter .

I need to vent a little . . Not trying to turn this into a book but maybe someone on here can relate.

So I read a lot of Roissy a while ago, and I've been reading the forum for a few months . .

I had a decent grasp on inner game and I was slowly starting to become very comfortable with being more bold with whatever it was I did , maintaining eye contact with women and gaming them as well . . I felt free knowing that what I was doing with girls turned them on and it was good to see results (though I never took it all the way with anything ) .

Anyways, lately I've been feeling like I'm losing the understanding of it . I'd say it's because I'm trapped right now in my hometown and I don't get out much, but I'm losing that confidence I once had where I could say anything to a girl and I wasn't afraid (and especially the eye contact) .

I'm still living at home, trying to get a job so I can move out of here in a year but it seems far away . I'm working very hard in my band and were doing fuckin awesome . We practice our asses off and we'll have shows in Boston soon .

I've fucked around with girls before, got head and shit but I have still yet to fuck a girl and it's messing with me . Since I've never really had a girlfriend (I mean I had a few but I fucked it up by being beta as hell and falling for them ) I've had people ask me if I was gay before so then I start to think that maybe I come off as a fag to people which in turn makes me incredibly self conscious to the point that I'm trapped in my head .

The internal monologue is fucking me over , stuff like "what kind of girl would want to be with you at your moms house " and so on .

I mean, I'm a very talented musician, I'm tall, I'd say handsome I guess . I just can't seem to get my mind out of the gutter .

I'm allowing the AFC mentality to take over because I haven't been experiencing any breakthroughs lately .

It was pretty embarrassing to type all of this but I've been needing to get this shit out for a while . . I could use some motivation. Anyone ever dealt with something even remotely similar to this ?
fuck.
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