[endobendo]

(09-18-2011 06:57 PM)OGNorCal707 Wrote:  

Okay guys so this maybe a long post. I didn't officially get flaked on, and did in fact end up going on the date with the cute redhead shorty.

But ofcourse, something felt off about the whole thing from the get go, (she took like 2.5 days to reply to my initial text), on the day of the date around 4 pm she sent me a text more or less saying, "I think I should tell you this but I have a bf, I hope you won't get upset. I'm still down to hang out though because you're a cool guy, but I don't want anything too crazy."

I probably should have sent a text that was playful and teasing in reply, something like "well I don't want to totally let you down or lead you on, but I'm actually dating 3 girls right now. Maybe you can be number 4 if you're lucky." That would project the image that I don't give a fuck, it doesn't bother me, and it's playfully ambiguous as to whether I am actually seeing other girls.

Instead I replied with something intended to be mature and direct, I said something to the affect of "well that's a bit of a surprise, it doesn't bother me that you have a BF, but I will admit that I think you're cute, and am interested in being more than just friends." ( I think I may post my texts for you guys to read/analyze if you'd like).

So we ended up going on the date, I pulled up to pick her up in front of her apartment, and as she approached the car, I was like "damn is that the same chick?" When I met her she was wearing glasses, no make up, loose fitting long summer dress, etc., I thought she was a 6.5 or maybe 7 at best. Well let me tell you that she cleaned up nicely, man she was looking fine, definitely an eight (I was like "good boy, good boy" to myself). It's amazing how no glasses, a little make up, doing their hair, wearing sexy clothes and heals will do to a woman's attractiveness level.

Anyways, we rolled to the tequila bar, right off the bat the convo was good, I tried to indirectly DHV by talking to the bartender about tequila (anejos, how old, comparing to other brands, letting her know I didn;t want certain ones), the bartender seemed impressed I knew so much, so I'm sure the girl did too.

I hadn't been on a first date in a while, so I got to admit I was a little nervous, esp. because the girl was way hotter than I org. thought (which I know is kinda lame). More than anything my first date game was a little weak, I think first date game is a bit different than approach/night game, it's just you and them and now you got to build the connection and rapport a bit more, while slowly escalating.

I made sure to not initiate kino too soon, tried to wait till have way through her second drink, just went for it and planted my hand on her upper thigh, but for some reason, I think I wasn't completely fluid, comfortable, and may have came off a little awkward. I ended up taking my hand away a bit too soon.

Anyways, not to overanalyze and nitpick, but as we got more alcohol in us and ordered our third cocktail, I was getting a better vibe, was more comfortable and confident, was initiating more kino. At some point I was getting good vibes from her body language, eye contact, smiling, etc. I went in for the kiss, I leaned into her and expected her to lean into me for the kiss. She didn't lean in, but I went for the kiss anyways, although there was a second delay which made it slightly awkward.

She didn't reject my kiss and we kissed for probably like 30 seconds. I ended up kissing her a few more times, but each time I was the one that was more aggessive, and she was kind of just submissive, "allowing me to kiss her." I got a little bit of tongue, but she wasn't every enthusiastic about it.

All things considered it seemed like it was going well, by the end of the third drink we were more or less cuddling on the lounge couch, holding hands, and she had her other hand on my upper thigh.

We paid the bill, it was expense shit (10 dollar shots on anejo top shelf, and we both got 2 artisanal cocktails, the total bill came out to $60, I threw down $40 and she threw down $20, which I think is cool considering I am 6 years older and have waaay more cash than her (shes a broke college kid).

Was getting some pretty good IOI's from her, on the ride back she asked me what I was up to for the rest of the night, I was like going to blaze some herb, you should come back with me to my pad to burn. She was saying that she had a test in the morning and wanted to go home, but invited me up to her apartment to blaze.

I was like cool, so we rolled up to her apartment, she casually mentioned that her BF lived in the next building over (same complex). Her roommmate (the Mexi chick I met the day of the approach), was chilling watching Eastbound and Down on TV with her BF. I made a joke about how my respect level for the girls and their level of coolness, just went up, now that I know they liked Eastbound and Down.

Me and the cute redhead shorty hit the bong a couple times and we all talked about Kenny Power, Stevie, the gangster midget, etc. At this point cute redhead shorty is scooting away from me on the couch, not letting me touch, and then all of a sudden she's like "I'm tired, I need to go to bed."

So I'm like okay well I guess I should go. She tries to give me a high five, I high five her and I'm like "that's it?", and I pulled her in for a hug. She walks me to the door, and I was expecting a good night kiss, I walk on her front porch and was expecting her to step outside to give me a kiss goodbye (I figured she didn't want to do this in front of her roommate & her BF). But, it was super awkward, we just stood there looking at each other for a second, and then I put my hands up in the motion that I wanted a hug, and she looked at me, and waved, and closed the door shut.

I walked away from there like WTF? That was fucking wack. I thought the date went well overall, and then she pulled that move at the end of the night. I just assumed that, that was that, and she wasn't feeling it. But the next morning she sent me a text early around 10:30 saying "thanks for the night out, I had a really good time", or something to that affect.

I took that mean that she was actually relatively interested and waited a while, and replied, "yeah for sure, nice to hear you enjoyed it, maybe we can do it again sometime." She replied back relatively quickly and was like "defintely, maybe this weekend or something."

We went out Tuesday and I was going to hit her up Thursday eve with a text to try and lock down a date for the weekend, but earlier in the day I had an epiphany. I dated a certain psycho chick with BPD for 8 months and she lied to me, deceived me, manipulated me, and I'm quite certain (now) that she cheated on me through a good part of our relationship with a guy that was supposedly a "harmless dude, that had no chance, and was just a friend, etc."

I basically believed a lot of her BS like a fucking chump, while this other dude was probably getting pussy occasionally from my GF and just resigned himself to be her "number 2 guy, bench warmer, fill in", when she had the odd night off that she wasn't with me. Not saying this dude was a chump or beta or anything, because if anything that was me, but he liked my ex-chick, wanted to date her, knew that she had a BF, and would still make efforts to pursue her and hang out with her to get the pussy.

Well my point is that I would in affect become that guy with this chick, and her boyfriend would probably occupy the role that I was in. It's possible that she would eventually come to like me more and dump her boyfriend for me, but I don't want to start any kind of relationship like that. I decided that I could try to hit it and quit it, but I don't really want to put in the effort to pursue this chick when she has a BF. If she was hitting me up to chill and making herself available to me, that would be one thing. Also I think a lot of this chasing girls with BF thing, is what's contributing to "hypergamy" and the spoiled, entitled attitude girls have that it's okay to cheat on their boyfriends, and have their cake and eat it too.

So at this point I have decided to NOT pursue her. I sent her a text on Fri. evening basically saying "hey what up, I'm hitting the bars downtown later, meet me down there if u wanna drink." She replied pretty quickly and said that she went out the night before, was tired, just hanging out with her friend, and might be down to go out tommorrow." I decided to not reply to her at all, and will probably just drop it as a prospect, and maybe try to game her if I run into her at a bar or party.

I will post my text conversations from start to finish for anyone curious to read. I think some of it's pretty good stuff, but I'm open to constructive criticism. I will call her "Stacy" for our purposes, I'll post days and times as well starting from first to last text:

OG (Sept 7, 8:07)

"Hey Stacy, it's OG from the block party. How's it going?"

Stacy (Sept 10, 3:32)

"Yooo OG!! Dude I am soo sry, i only just now saw your text lol, hows it goinn!'

OG (3:59)

Wow i think thats the longest it's ever taken for a girl to get back to me, ur goin into the record books!... Lol, I'm doing good, hit the farmers market earlier, got some good food. How about u?

Stacy

Nice, love itt haha ya dude my bad, my phones kinda weird sometimes... at least i broke a record haha wooo!

OG

Hahaha, no worries! Better late than never, right? I hit you up, bc/ I enjoyed our chat the other day. You and ur friend seemed real cool. Would u be down to hang out sometime>

Stacy

Definitely dude it was cool! Also thanks again for the birthday beer haha

OG

Yeah for sure. We should celebrate some more, u only turn 21 once. Maybe with some good tequila next time.

Stacy

Hahah down me n erika lovveee tequila got patron on my bday, it was awesome

OG

Nice, patron is def a staple in my tequila diet, lol. Theres a really nice lounge in ____ I like that has over 300 diff types of bomb tequila. Let's check it out sometime next week

Stacy

Woooo! Thats awesomee im down whats it called?

OG

its called _____, it like the only place in ______, thats nice enough that u feel like ur in SF or LA. How does Weds night sound?

Stacy

Ooohh you know Ive actually heard of that place! I hear its fanccyy, super dope but im pretty sure i work till like 1030 weds nite, i'll find out for sure tom, but just in case do you think like tues or thurs would be chill?

OG

Yeah for sure, my schedule is really flexible. Let's plan on chillin tues or weds night. I'll check back with u in a couple days to see whats up.

Stacy

Sweeet!! Stokedddd


Stacy (Sept 12 4:33 pm)

Heyy soo yea i dont get off work til 1030 weds

OG 4:51

No worries, so how about we grab a drink tomorrow night then

Stacy

Sounds lovely

OG

Cool how does 9:30ish sound?

Stacy

Sounds good

OG

Nice I can pick you up if you'd like, or we can meet there

Stacy (Sept 13, 10:54 AM)

Heyy so do you think we could maybe make tnite a bit earlier? I got a test at 8am tom

Oh ya n thatd be cool if you pick me up, i dont have transportation lol

OG 11:24 AM

Hey thats cool 8am is hella early, and I dont norm rage too hard Tues nights anways ;-)

Stacy

Hah, cool beans then

OG

How about I pick you up around 8:30? Or is that too late

Stacy

Yepp sounds good

OG

What you're address?

Stacy

(Some place in NorCal)

OG

Cool should be easy to find, I'll give u a ring when I get there

Stacy

Arritteee

Stacy (3:04 PM)

Soo uhh i dunno maybe i should tell you, i have a bf, so im not really looking for anything crazy, but i def think youre a chill guy n would like to hangout regardless ya know? So yea, i dunno if you wanna go somewhere else or somethin that fine, but yeaa just wanted to let you know

OG (3:27)

Well thats a lil bit unexpected, but I appreciate your honesty. It doesnt bother me that u have a bf, but I will admit that I think ur cute, and am interested in being more than "just friends." We can take it slow if youd like. So I guess the ball is in your court, if u dont want to hang out thats fine. Just give me a definite answer so I can plan my night accordingly.

Stacy

Uhmm well like i said, im still down to chill, just didnt wanna like let you down or anything. But yee up to you, im down to chill, n you never know things could change

OG

Im totally devestated, I think Im just gonna stay in and curl up with my cat, a pint of ice cream, and watch a romantic comedy tonight

Stacy

Haah really?

OG

Haha just kidding... I don't own a cat!!

OG (waited a few mins)...

Should we stick to the OG plan or would rather do something else?

Stacy

Haha ok, but what can't hang out with me now? I mean you dont even know me dude, dont wanna at least make a new friend?

OG

Im totally down to chill, I was just joking about that whole staying at home and watching a romantic comedy thing

Unles u want to come snuggle up with me and watch one... lol

Stacy

Oohh haha ok cool, um yeaa im down for what we were gna do, ive alwayd want to go there

OG

Ok coo, so it's official! I'm going to pick you up at 8:30, were going to have a fabulous time at the ____... And I promise I'll be a perfect gentleman :-P

Stacy

Buenooo



Stacy (Sept 14, 10:00 AM)

Heyy thanks for last night dude, it was super cool

OG (11:35 Am)

Yea for sure, nice to hear u enjoyed it, maybe we can do it again sometime

Stacy

Definitellyy, some weekend night or somethin

OG

Cool sounds good... Oh yeah hopefully u were feelin arlright at the test this morn, I'd hate being a bad influnce on such a sweet young girl :-P

Stacy

Haha you're terrible lol, ye i was ok

OG (Sept 16, 8:47)

Hey Stacy what up! I'm hittin the bars downtown later, meet me down there if u wanna drink

Stacy (9:11)

Oohhh snap duuude im just kicking it with my friend, were eating tacos n watching scary movies, painting our nails, drinking beer, walking around in high heels lol very exciting yes, haha ummm im pretty worn out from pint nite, i think im just gonna kick it here tonite! Prob goin tom thoo

bf thing could have just been a lie so that she could bail if the date was goin badly. her sayin "things can change" etc right off the bat sounds like it its a lie or aint that serious