I attended a work party last night at a local restaurant. About 20 of my mainly Japanese coworkers were there, 14 men and six women. I went with rugged style, wearing this buttoned-up with a black t-shirt, dark skinny jeans, brown chukka boots, and a black ivy cap (that's a good jacket by the way if you lift weights as it really shows off your figure). I decided to practice being more cool and alpha by focusing on being really relaxed, slightly detached and aloof but friendly, trying to casually lead the conversation, and not fawning over the women present, as my coworkers usually do. I tried to project a strong, confident frame, as if everything was happening according to my will. It was interesting the effect that it had.
I noticed that people started following my lead and paying attention to what I was doing without me trying to catch their attention. After the dinner, it's customary for the group to split into smaller groups with each one bouncing to a different venue for after-parties. One of my male coworkers was trying to co-opt the women by inviting them to go sing karaoke. I simply stood outside the restaurant with a "I don't give a fuck" demeanor (which was not affected. I really didn't give a fuck). Someone asked me what I was doing next and I said that I was going to a new brew-pub that I had scouted out earlier. I said it with a tone that I was going and I didn't care if anyone went with me, but that they were welcome to join. I then turned and started to walk away with a couple of my coworkers who were already close friends of mine. To my surprise, the entire group followed us.
We went to the pub and everyone got really hammered. Most people had to leave to catch the train about 2230. Two of my male coworkers decided to join me at a late night cocktail/cigar bar even though it meant an expensive cab ride or long walk for one of them after the trains stopped. I felt like people were wanting to listen to what I had to say and be part of my conversation all night. It wasn't completely that way all the time with everyone, of course, but it was much more prevalent than it had been at previous office activities.
I wasn't expecting everyone to stick with me. In fact, I was kind of hoping for everyone to eventually take off so I could roam around solo and resume the 100 approach challenge. Because my co-workers were with me the entire night, I couldn't really try it, although I think that may be a little bit of a cop-out because if I had been a little more creative, I probably could have created opportunities to approach the strangers around me without my coworkers noticing.
I noticed that people started following my lead and paying attention to what I was doing without me trying to catch their attention. After the dinner, it's customary for the group to split into smaller groups with each one bouncing to a different venue for after-parties. One of my male coworkers was trying to co-opt the women by inviting them to go sing karaoke. I simply stood outside the restaurant with a "I don't give a fuck" demeanor (which was not affected. I really didn't give a fuck). Someone asked me what I was doing next and I said that I was going to a new brew-pub that I had scouted out earlier. I said it with a tone that I was going and I didn't care if anyone went with me, but that they were welcome to join. I then turned and started to walk away with a couple of my coworkers who were already close friends of mine. To my surprise, the entire group followed us.
We went to the pub and everyone got really hammered. Most people had to leave to catch the train about 2230. Two of my male coworkers decided to join me at a late night cocktail/cigar bar even though it meant an expensive cab ride or long walk for one of them after the trains stopped. I felt like people were wanting to listen to what I had to say and be part of my conversation all night. It wasn't completely that way all the time with everyone, of course, but it was much more prevalent than it had been at previous office activities.
I wasn't expecting everyone to stick with me. In fact, I was kind of hoping for everyone to eventually take off so I could roam around solo and resume the 100 approach challenge. Because my co-workers were with me the entire night, I couldn't really try it, although I think that may be a little bit of a cop-out because if I had been a little more creative, I probably could have created opportunities to approach the strangers around me without my coworkers noticing.