[Nemencine]

Hey Fellas. I reached out to Hencredible Casanova because I've been a huge fan of his posts for a long time and gifted his lifetime membership. HC received a lot of your pm's but he is not able to access them... if you want to contact him, kindly do so by clicking on his email rather than his pm as illustrated in this picture:

http://my.jetscreenshot.com/demo/2014030...-186kb.jpg

Hencredible Casanova also wrote up a response and felt compelled to share his side of the story so that no one gets the wrong impression (his words).... I am taking the liberty of posting it below.

Quote:

In the time since the news broke out that I requested and received a permanent ban, I've been reached by several members asking how I'm doing and if I'm okay. Given the unique circumstances – I believe I'm the first member to ever request a perm ban – and my many years as a valued member, I wanted to give my point of view so that I could be heard and the RVF community has a more accurate picture of what really happened – taking Roosh's views into account as well.

I'm not making this out to be a battle of truths. No one person has a monopoly on the truth. I am simply giving my perspective of events to help dispel any misconceptions or misinformation anyone may have.

My views, first and foremost, are not against Roosh in real life. His behavior as a mod and the person I have met him are not the same IMO. I have met the man and have nothing bad at all to say about him. If I bumped into him in person, I'd offer to grab some drinks or game some chicks with him. This is no big deal and this situation is completely dissected from him as a person in real life.

This will be my last message to the forum and I will not be glued in to see the response. I am moving on and moving forward. Please don't react unreasonably within the thread.

I have enlisted Nemencine to deliver this message. He's been a longtime supporter of mine and has been real sincere in his concern about my departure.

So, with that said, here is the context from my perspective so that you guys can (hopefully) walk away with a more balanced view.

Tldr; just scroll down to the “conclusion” section if you want to see why I really wanted a permanent ban.


Why I got a Temp Suspension

This is what I still don't really know the answer to. I can only make guesses.

Roosh's message that several members had been complaining about me was a surprise because I had spoken to the active posters on the Ukraine thread via PM and none of them reported me to Roosh (i.e. DaveR, Jimumkr, Icarus, Blunt).

In fact, what Roosh and some other posters didn't know until after the temp ban is that I took the convo I had with DaveR private via PM several hours before the ban as to not turn the Ukraine thread into a junk thread (I titled the subject of that PM along those lines). Dave and I simply proceeded to continue our discussion off the thread. If you noticed from that thread, he was the first to respond directly to me (not the opposite) in a recriminatory manner.

I learned via PM he was mainly displeased by my alleged bias being someone who hasn't visited or lived in the region that the thread was concerned with.

I can understand that, though I'll give my thoughts on that later.

But more importantly, he never reported me to Roosh and even made another post in the thread after our first PM exchange which I never responded to, in compliance with my reason for taking the convo off the thread.  DaveR then actually apologized for insulting me personally and for his posts but I thought an apology was unnecessary because I didn't take offense. I was simply responding to his arguments in a confident manner, but I don't think any reasonable person could say it was personal, especially compared to the actual intense poly threads I've engaged in with members in the past. I wasn't emotional at all nor having a meltdown. Wha some may see as condescension I see as confidence. You'll see many times where I said to DaveR “let's see what happens” with the events in Ukraine and that “there's no reason to go back and forth,” etc. I saw no point in being argumentative over commentary that's nothing more than opinion and that has zero efficacy in the real world. I agree that such endeavors are an utter waste of time when taken seriously. I don't debate politics in real life or anywhere else on the web. I just post my views in the thread if the story interests me and I feel I can add value.

When DaveR learned I got a temp suspension several hours later, he felt it was unfair and said if I got one, he deserved one too, and that he would write to Roosh.  I say this so that everyone doesn't look at him as the guy who got me heated (I was never heated with him or anyone in that thread). So let's just clear that up.

The question remains that if DaveR (the person I was specifically talking to in the Ukraine thread) and other active posters didn't report me, then who did? And why would that reporting lead to taking aggressive action against me if they aren't engaging me in their posts and I'm not talking to them? In this context, one can't feel offended for someone else when that person isn't offended. Who are the "several members" Roosh was referring to?

Roosh never once bothered to answer that question, leading me to wonder if he was being truthful at all. In fact, he never responded to any of my PMs, which were not angry, but legit disappointment and curiosity. I sent PMs that were a copy/past of my convo with Dave so that he could see we weren't at loggerheads at all, quite the contrary.

Given I have met Roosh and have been a valued member for a long time, I figured he would just PM me if he ever saw me acting a certain way and wanted me to stop. He's done that in the handful of times during the past few years and the issue was resolved on the spot. But an aggressive warning increase (40%, on top of a 20% one from a while ago), temp suspension, and no relation to a post or specific conduct (as he had always done previously), was unreasonable to me. He didn't even cite a post or specific thing I said that would warrant such a move.

As for who reported me, my only guess is that they were mainly – if not solely - members on the sidelines who weren't even posting and didn't like me - holding grievances from other threads in the past - and wanting to report me out of spite.

I think of two accounts in particular, but only care to emphasize one.

There's one guy who posted once in the first Ukraine conflict thread and once in the current one before I got the suspension.  Both posts had nothing to do with Ukraine, just posts about me.  I never responded directly to him nor did I ever insult him.  I don't know who he even is. Never saw him before.  His post before I got the warning was cryptic too. He said something like "my prediction: failure for Obama/the West/Hencredible."I'm guessing he reported me.  I reported the post and followed up with a PM to Tuth but never got a response. It looks like nothing happened to that guy either.

I also noticed other accounts following me around from other threads (and liking posts counter to mine) yet not posting in the thread. Some members take meaningless differences with internet strangers too seriously. It's simultaneously sad and funny.



Because neither DaveR nor other active guys in the Ukraine thread reported me (if their word is true, and I don't doubt it was not), I wondered what basis Roosh had for issuing a harsh – not minor – warning without talking to me first.

Even if Roosh really did hear from several members, despite his lack of evidence in his outreach to me, I think his decision was incommensurate with his cause, considering past protocol. He could have just said tone it down.

I'm no psychotherapist, and won't pretend to be one, but the thing I keep in mind about him is how he's said that he's spent the past few years relatively isolated from family and close friends, experiencing the most fleeting of friendships and relationships, and spending inordinate amounts of time alone. I'm not sure he always picks up on the nuances on the appropriate ways to deal with others. He could have just sent a PM and it's done.

I was never angry or emotional when conversing with DaveR, as he can tell you from our PM exchange. I was actually cool-headed the whole time and just stuck to the facts.

Just like Roosh and others, I assume, I place a premium on accurate information. Whether it's a data sheet or a political thread, that's of fundamental importance to me. DaveR began the recriminatory exchange and by his own admission insulted me. Though the details are silly in hindsight, he said things like VP never published a memoir which was untrue. He commissioned a memoir published under his name and engaged in a series of lengthy interviews for that purpose.

He also claimed the “geopolitical disaster” quote was taken out of context but all he did was post two Kremlin links translating the speech, none of which include commentary saying he was misquoted. I have not found a single source from anywhere (East or West) that says he was taken out of context, regardless of the literal translation word for word translation from Russian to English. I was asking for an article from any perspective showing otherwise but did not get one. There was no real reason for DaveR to harp endlessly on that point otherwise.

But it seems setting facts straight are not so important when people feel chagrined by my audacity to post my views so confidently. I never began an exchange replying to a specific poster actually. I try to stay general. When people respond to me directly, and even inviting discord, I may say something cocky but it's not that serious. I can't believe guys get so butthurt by things like this.

Dave didn't consider me as talking down to him and I never said anything worse than what he said to me.

I also copied Dave to most of my several PMs to Roosh/Tuth. So he has the information that was sent most likely still. I never bothered to do a screen grab myself because I never expected to be in a position where I'd be giving my version of events.

What's funny is that, via PM, my views with Dave were actually pretty close to each other on the issues we had been talking about. Things immediately diffused. There's a tendency when debating publicly to save face and take an inflexible position – or have things lost in translation - and even argue positions you are not that adamant about in real life. That's just the nature of public rhetoric. Something to keep in mind.

DaveR claimed he started the rhetorical attack because he didn't like to see someone who hadn't been to the region speaking about it with a US POV

I disagreed for many reasons. For one, this is not some academic forum or high-level political talk. We're just guys sharing opinions. I can understand if I called him out, then of course he has a right to challenge my credibility, but not when unprovoked.

Further, DaveR, even if he has been to the region, lives not in Ukraine, Crimea, or even Moscow, but St. Petersburg – a place considered the most European city in Russia. That's not exactly “on the ground.” Plus, as he also admitted, Russian media propaganda is quite bad. He's also likely not a government official or privy to the highest echelons of decision-making bodies.

Also, I'm not sure how many people know this about me, and I have mentioned it in the past, but I was assigned to work in Tunisia and Egypt during the Arab Spring. That was a major paradigm shift and life defining experience for me. I have actually witnessed revolutions firsthand in real time and I also happen to take a very keen interest in international events. The people to people contacts that I made in that part of the world are still enduring and remain strong til' this day. I had once been an extremely cynical critic of US foreign policy – based on disillusionment with certain wars of choice – but during this experience and other travels around the Middle East, I came to see the real benefits – geopolitical and otherwise - of a strong US foreign policy.

I'm not saying that makes me qualified to wax philosophically about Ukraine, but I'm not exactly the average Joe off the street either. The point is, there's no need to call out guys for opinions you happen to disagree with. If you do, don't be a dick about it. Pretty simple. You'll notice if you look objectively that often guys have come at me in a disagreeable manner. I rarely initiate those discussions. Take a long objective look at those threads for yourself.

At this point, this is a moot consideration but I just wanted to set some context.


Why I asked to be permanently banned

Roosh never responded to my private messages from that morning (or ever) following the temp ban – which didn't include the insult he mentioned. That came later in the afternoon when I asked to be banned to incent him to actually do it. As he correctly stated, I was very sincere.

The messages from the morning expressed disappointment and surprise, but not anger IMO. Again, Roosh probably perceives words differently than myself. It's not so easy picking up one's tone in a written post, unlike an in-person convo/vid chat/phone call.

I then saw Roosh make a post in the Ukraine thread that said I'm on a three day break. I didn't interpret the insertion of “break” instead of “ban” to be significant because he still hadn't responded to my messages. Neither had Tuth btw who I also copied. So I simply didn't know what was on their minds and given I had met Roosh I felt he was just leaving me hanging. Not the way to treat a senior member – particularly one he has met – IMO. I had legitimate concerns and wanted answers. Again, my only guess for his behavior are those “gaps” I alluded to.

Whatever his reasons, it's still his forum and he can decide how he wants to run it, but that doesn't mean I have to comply with his decision and not challenge it. But knowing Roosh and the very stubborn decisions I've seen him make as a mod, I knew he wouldn't reverse any decision, no matter how compelling or factual my case was. So, I saw no solution but to exit stage left from a forum where I had been a valued member for years.

The important thing is the perm ban decision was mine. This premise or pressure on Roosh to reverse the decision is unfair to him and must be abolished. The ban is something I wanted and pressured him to accept.

In order to motivate Roosh to comply, I said that if he didn't ban me the first thing I'd do when regaining my posting privileges would be to "call him out on his bullshit stunt." Evidently, he had a "meltdown thread" in mind though that's not what I said. I was simply going to reply to his post in the Ukraine thread which announced my 3-day suspension, not make a whole new thread dissing him. I don't have any ill will towards Roosh, not in the least.

As for the insult, I did say Roosh has a "homo" obsession with VP, but that wasn't an angry insult. I said a similar thing in a recent post about Puntinophiliacs on the forum (homoerotic). The difference is the latter was general and the former was directed at an individual. IMO, that insult was minutiae to me compared to the important issues I mentioned in the PM's so it's funny to see that emphasized while the other parts were ignored. All good though.


Conclusion

The truth is I have not been pleased with the forum for some time. Writing and reading data sheets eventually got old for me. They simply come down to reports saying “I had a good trip...I got laid.” Further, places change very fast so the details tend to have a relatively short shelf life. One weekend, even one night, could be different from the next depending on the location we're talking. Just because I had a good time doesn't mean you will too, and vice versa. There's so many factors to consider.

I've found my greatest sheets to be the ones about places that are really under the radar for travel and women (Montreal, Mexico City, Scottsdale AZ, etc). I've seen instances where after I put the word out a critical mass was reached where several members hit up the same place and reported success. Those kind of results are satisfying. I feel like I really contributed something in those instances.

But there's also the fact that many places have been uncovered and once you've been around you just want to simply enjoy your personal experiences. By now, everyone should know how to coordinate a trip and write a data sheet.

We've also seen the departure of many excellent members (Mixx, Gmanifesto, Hooligan Harry, Entropy4, etc), who were true “thought leaders” that influenced the culture tremendously. I think that the standards have since fallen dramatically and I don't think there's any way to reverse it at this point.

I say that because ever since Roosh decided to go on the offensive wrt culture wars and all that stuff about feminists, we got a lot of "different" types of posters joining the forum. I can't blame Roosh if that put money in his pocket but I noticed a lot of the solid posters keeping their distance or simply leaving afterwards. I really don't get that stuff and never hang out in the type of scenes where I meet feminists or anything like that. I can't even read ROK articles - it's hard for me to relate to that stuff.


I know for some members the well-traveled and successful types on here seem like "moviestars" in a sense.

But in my own experience from years of traveling, networking, hustling, I've managed to cultivate a network of people I met in real life who are not so different. I've always been competing with those types of friends to keep myself on my toes and not stay complacent. Keep in mind I joined the forum back in 2011 with already substantial experience and had plenty of data to share immediately. A friend of mine put me onto it because he would stories very similar to the ones I told him from my travels. That was my sole reason for joining - to share data. I found it a fun and brotherly kind of environment at the time until that paradigm shift I mentioned.

I ever used to post pics of myself and of girls I was with in various venues, etc. I didn't give a fuck. But then that SPLC thing came out on Roosh which I can understand probably pissed him off. The culture wars that followed though did more harm to this place than good. I seriously don't understand the alpha/beta/omega/blue purple green pill nonsense.

So, increasingly in the years since I joined I've met many people through my existing networks who already do the type of things I enjoy for lifestyle and travel. They're hardly if ever on social media, no forums, and they have no idea what alpha/beta/red pill/blue pill means. They simply live life and enjoy their success. I have always been the type of guy to prefer playing “catch up or maintain" with people like that. I love the competition of being around people doing better than me because that's how you grow IMO. You are the sum of the five closest friends around you. I'm not saying there's not guys on the forum who are the same way, of course there are, but it's more efficient when you have a smaller network that comes from real life links and where there's no anonymity. I'd much rather be just one of the guys or even an underdog in those settings than be influential here. I don't want the role of being an “internet top dog.” Not a good look for me. The ban gives me a feeling of permanency in the decision to move forward and put this chapter behind. Thanks to Roosh for making it happen. Don't take any of it personal.

I know some of my intel has helped people but I find a lot of guys just sit on that stuff and don't act on it, making it largely useless by the time they are ready to apply it.

Another thing I want to stress going back to the original topic is there are wonders that can be done when you simply reach out via PM to a poster you're arguing back and forth with on a thread.  You'll find a lot of times that there's nothing really to it and that the person is more reasonable than they seem initially. I realized this after taking the initiative with DaveR. 

It would be great if mods would encourage that as etiquette,  especially now since 10 posters can be reached at one time via upgraded memberships, but even greater if posters could put ego aside and take the initiative themselves.  I guarantee you it would bury 99% of internet drama and raise quality control. It's the forum equivalent of grabbing a beer with a guy.

But it's also wise to simply to avoid certain threads.

There is a lot of potential that I've seen slip over time. One example that seems petty on the surface is the like system. It served a purpose when the rep point system was temporarily dismantled but is now useless since the rep system is back. The forum is like another FB. Prior to the like system, men had to earn another's respect through posting actionable intel. Now, any Joe off the block who sucks at life can be glorified. This sends the wrong message, but it's not my forum, just my two pennies.


Creating and sustaining a forum is probably far from easy, and I would never attempt it, so take that into consideration. But I don't think a thread exploring ideas to improve the atmosphere with a purpose of raising the potential of all members is a bad idea.

I ask all members to take what I've given and build on it. Think of ways to add value to the lives of others through the posting of actionable intel. There's been plenty of great(er) members who came and left before me, though much more quietly I'm sure. Too many to name all at once. Even some of the members no longer here were banned for reasons I'll never really understand. But ultimately, no one ever really leaves because their value remains long after they're gone. That's the beauty of the forum.

I leave with no grudges or grievances against any forum member here. Let's just keep it moving.

Cheers

P.S. Hell no will I be joining the Nomad forum or any forum nor coming back with a new account to post or troll. This is the first and last forum I've ever joined and it's just not the thing for me anymore. All the best to all of you fellas. It's been real!