Quote: (02-16-2018 12:49 PM)Rocha Wrote:
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The worst part about this is she was telling me how she got fucked in a tunnel, church and so on.
I'm sitting here like, this fucking girl gets fucked in a church and you couldn't bang her
when she drove 40 minutes to your place...
Ok. The key is here.
The moment she started to tell you all of that stuff you should have shut her down immediately.
I know we all as men have some morbid curiosity about hearing these stories, and some girls know that.
You should have said "Listen honey, I just talk about sex with someone I had already sex with", "I don't like to talk about sex, i'd rather do it", "actions speak more than words, so please take off your pants", "If I tell you my stories you will never look at me the same way, so in the same way, I don't want to hear that"... something along these lines.
Next time, even if you feel the slightest curiosity, remember Lot from the Bible and how he did not turned his back while Sodoma was burning, and his wife became a stone after disobeying God commands.
This is complete opposite of the type of game I think would work...which means I have to try it.
The quote from the Bible is good.
Quote: (02-16-2018 12:50 PM)kaotic Wrote:
Quote: (02-16-2018 12:37 PM)the1element Wrote:
Ah, this was my sexualizing the conversation...
I asked her what was the most adventurous thing she has done, or was it craziest...I can't remember but it was one of those questions.
She told me about a rowing party and it was at a church...
I sort of picked up by the way she said
"It was wild"
That she got fucked, so I just asked her..
You had sex didn't you.
And then she told me the story.
One thing I've been told I am good at is making people comfortable, I've always had this sort of ability and if a girl likes me they usually feel comfortable with telling me stories of depravity.
Interesting, I'm the opposite, I never ask about their sexual history or crazy stories, even after I fuck them.
It could be this "comfort" style of asking could be somewhat of an Achilles heel - because it's messing with your head. I can tell because you were frustrated you couldn't bag her that night.
Like gents have said - don't burn this bridge, keep in contact.
Interesting take, I sort of enjoy the past sexual stories or crazy stories..but maybe I should reserve those for after sex at the least.
I'll have to try your approach...noob question here, how would you sexualize conversation? This is usually the way I do it.
Did not burn the bridge.
We're texting, she's responding just the way she did before the date. Don't see a problem here.
I should add one more detail...
Just before she left, she asked me how I deal with girls over at my moms place (we were at my dads because he was away), she said if you wanted to hang out with a girl, what do you do?
I told her that my mom works 7-5 so it would have to be in the timeframe because my mom is really religious and against me having girls over.
Then she told me that her mom doesn't care, she brings guys there and her mom doesn't say anything.
Quote: (02-16-2018 12:58 PM)ksbms Wrote:
Gold advice. It's possible that her telling you these stories activated her anti-slut defense mechanism. So she is a chaste girl now who only accepts wining & dining...
Never thought of that. Like I said above, I'll have to try not talking about these things with a girl and see how it goes.
Quote: (02-16-2018 01:05 PM)Rocha Wrote:
I don't it is related to an anti slut mechanism, because she is a straight slut if she feels comfortable talking about that stuff.
It is more on the guy, that starts to visualize all this stuff in his head and starts to make mistake after mistake, starts to get horny loosing his cool and composure.
A man should never loose his cool and composure.
Few talk about this.
Good stuff, this is pretty accurate.
I wasn't really super horny and lost my cool, I was cool the entire date even when she told me she had to leave I just rolled over in my bed and grabbed my laptop and started working on some work.
Quote: (02-16-2018 01:10 PM)Noir Wrote:
This is why I love this forum, some solid advice dropped in this thread.
Personally, I think you did fine. This is how you learn, you wrote a report and can analyse what went 'wrong'.
It's counter intuitive but you have to be outcome independent in your mindset. You know she will put out, it's just a matter of time.
Regarding what she said about getting fucked here and there, your default response (for any kind of edgy shit they say) should be "that's cute". It could be a shit test, it could be a lie. It could be the truth and if she put out, you would rationalize her as being a slut. This could go so many ways so really don't read into it.
Again, kaotic, touched upon a gold nugget; indirect verbals and direct non-verbals. This is where the mystery comes in. You don't talk about sex but you are sexy. Let her mind fill in the gaps.
As for her putting out or not, it's purely sexual chemistry. With some girls, it happens the first time. With others, it's on the second or third time.
Find other girls to occupy your mind because with one girl, in this scenario, you will become overly invested.
Honestly, as long as you two had fun, the sex will come.
Good luck man.
Thanks man,
I'm happy to have like-minded men that share my interest in pussy :eatout:
I've got two girls on the go, one is sick but we should be hanging out next week (she's cuter than the one this post is about) and the other is the one I went to the waterfalls with (its in my post history), she's a virgin though and sort of distanced ish through text.
I'm happy that I'm improving the quality of girls I'm attracting though, this girl, the virgin and the one thats sick have good bodies on them and are feminine (which I really like).