Once my body really starts to fail me at 75-80+, I'd like to retire to my local poker room. I will show up every day at 9am and play 1/2 NL holdem and small buy-in poker tournaments all fucking day and talk shit to the young guns and bust all of the dealers' balls. I will leave every day at the same time so I can get the early-bird special at the buffet and beat the traffic home.
All the pretty 21 year old waitresses will know my name and look forward to seeing me everyday because I will be the funny, sweet old man who sneaks them jolly ranchers and tips them $2 every time they bring me a hot cup of tea. I'll tell them they remind me of my deceased wife and/or beautiful granddaughter (neither who actually exist) and they will regularly give me hugs, which will be enough to satisfy any remaining sex drive I have left in my ancient balls.
Everyone there will love me until the day I die. After I go, the dealers and casino managers will reminisce about me and share my stories with other dealers and players until they die too.
All the pretty 21 year old waitresses will know my name and look forward to seeing me everyday because I will be the funny, sweet old man who sneaks them jolly ranchers and tips them $2 every time they bring me a hot cup of tea. I'll tell them they remind me of my deceased wife and/or beautiful granddaughter (neither who actually exist) and they will regularly give me hugs, which will be enough to satisfy any remaining sex drive I have left in my ancient balls.
Everyone there will love me until the day I die. After I go, the dealers and casino managers will reminisce about me and share my stories with other dealers and players until they die too.