I've noticed an interesting trend, particularly among liberal beta males...
Women will have a boyfriend, or even a husband, often who she lives with. He's her boyfriend in pretty much every respect, except for one thing - she gets to bang other dudes. The typical makeup of this relationship is a beta male dating a relatively attractive liberal self-identified feminist. I have found some of my friends wives on Bumble / Tinder, and amazingly, they know about it. The woman is usually banging out like crazy, while the "boyfriend" is sitting at home watching TV.
When I laugh at these women (and men) for it, the response is almost always this:
"What, Hank, you're not man enough to date a woman who wants to be in an open relationship? And you sleep around all the time! You're such a hypocrite!"
No. There is a huge difference between casual dating and being in "an open relationship."
When you're casually dating, you don't live with the girl, you don't pick her up from the airport, and do not hold her out to your friends and family as your "girlfriend." You don't need to be emotionally cold, and may even enjoy her company, but you do not hold her out as your +1. She's simply a woman that you hang out with from time to time. Hell, I even take my FWBs out on dates here and there if I feel like going out with a woman on my arm. But they don't live in my house or attend Christmas dinner with my family.
However, when I have an actual girlfriend, someone I hold out as my +1, any male who tries to go near her will have hands put on them. Once I've chosen to make a commitment, which is rare, she's mine. And if I found her "dating", the relationship would be over.
Anyway, this is my point...
Casual dating is fine. Have a lot of friends with benefits. If one of your FWBs says they want a commitment, that's on you and how you want your life to unfold.
However, if a woman wants to be in an "open relationship", head for the hills. It means she wants you to be her supplicating beta boyfriend or husband while still blowing alphas in bar bathrooms. I am amazed that males agree to be in "open relationships."
Women will have a boyfriend, or even a husband, often who she lives with. He's her boyfriend in pretty much every respect, except for one thing - she gets to bang other dudes. The typical makeup of this relationship is a beta male dating a relatively attractive liberal self-identified feminist. I have found some of my friends wives on Bumble / Tinder, and amazingly, they know about it. The woman is usually banging out like crazy, while the "boyfriend" is sitting at home watching TV.
When I laugh at these women (and men) for it, the response is almost always this:
"What, Hank, you're not man enough to date a woman who wants to be in an open relationship? And you sleep around all the time! You're such a hypocrite!"
No. There is a huge difference between casual dating and being in "an open relationship."
When you're casually dating, you don't live with the girl, you don't pick her up from the airport, and do not hold her out to your friends and family as your "girlfriend." You don't need to be emotionally cold, and may even enjoy her company, but you do not hold her out as your +1. She's simply a woman that you hang out with from time to time. Hell, I even take my FWBs out on dates here and there if I feel like going out with a woman on my arm. But they don't live in my house or attend Christmas dinner with my family.
However, when I have an actual girlfriend, someone I hold out as my +1, any male who tries to go near her will have hands put on them. Once I've chosen to make a commitment, which is rare, she's mine. And if I found her "dating", the relationship would be over.
Anyway, this is my point...
Casual dating is fine. Have a lot of friends with benefits. If one of your FWBs says they want a commitment, that's on you and how you want your life to unfold.
However, if a woman wants to be in an "open relationship", head for the hills. It means she wants you to be her supplicating beta boyfriend or husband while still blowing alphas in bar bathrooms. I am amazed that males agree to be in "open relationships."