Relationships are a story that exists in each person's head. No matter how much you try to understand another person, they exist only as a fictionalized character in your head. Based on reality, sure, but still embellished with your hopes/fears/desires. That's where so many fights come from, where it seems like one or both people misrepresent the other in a negative way.
When you're alone and you have a lot of idle time, your mind wanders. You start running what-if scenarios. Some of those what-ifs are "I wonder what she's up to now?"
Finding activities that are fully engaging is important. It doesn't have to be a rebound relationship. Just something that keeps your mind busy. It's that idle time when you're alone in bed and have nothing to do but ruminate that you're liable to backslide.
There needs to be a positive and healthy reason to reach out to someone. Reaching out to an ex with whom you share negative baggage only conveys a sense of desperation. I've gotten these attempts to reconnect and they come across so pathetic in the way she would build her case or try to wipe away the bad stuff with promises of easy no-strings sex. It's never been worth it to take those offers.
When you're alone and you have a lot of idle time, your mind wanders. You start running what-if scenarios. Some of those what-ifs are "I wonder what she's up to now?"
Finding activities that are fully engaging is important. It doesn't have to be a rebound relationship. Just something that keeps your mind busy. It's that idle time when you're alone in bed and have nothing to do but ruminate that you're liable to backslide.
There needs to be a positive and healthy reason to reach out to someone. Reaching out to an ex with whom you share negative baggage only conveys a sense of desperation. I've gotten these attempts to reconnect and they come across so pathetic in the way she would build her case or try to wipe away the bad stuff with promises of easy no-strings sex. It's never been worth it to take those offers.