Is it wrong to want a serious girlfriend over being a player while still in college?
10-30-2016, 05:04 PM
Nothing wrong with being a serial monogamist.
I think the emphasis on not tying yourself down when you are young is to keep you from getting oneitis or trapped into the wrong marriage before you have experience. Something about seeing the same personality traits and habits popping up in girl after girl protects you against thinking you have found your soul mate when what you have found is the first girl you like.
If you can have girlfriends without putting them on a pedestal, you are probably fine.
On the other hand, loneliness is a part of life, and if you are rushing into relationships so you don't have to deal with it, you might be vulnerable to a girl who knows how to push your buttons.
You always have to be willing to walk away, and if you are dependent on having a girl to fill the emptiness of winter, you might be setting yourself up for a fall.
If these feelings mainly hit during winter, it might be Seasonal Affective Disorder, and all you need is some light therapy and some vitamin d.
Your life will never have such an abundance of good looking young women who are open to new experiences and are all conveniently in your social circle by virtue of going to the same school as you do.
A lot of guys don't realize this, and look back on their college years wishing they had taken advantage of more opportunities at the time.
That is the cost of tying yourself down early.
I think the emphasis on not tying yourself down when you are young is to keep you from getting oneitis or trapped into the wrong marriage before you have experience. Something about seeing the same personality traits and habits popping up in girl after girl protects you against thinking you have found your soul mate when what you have found is the first girl you like.
If you can have girlfriends without putting them on a pedestal, you are probably fine.
On the other hand, loneliness is a part of life, and if you are rushing into relationships so you don't have to deal with it, you might be vulnerable to a girl who knows how to push your buttons.
You always have to be willing to walk away, and if you are dependent on having a girl to fill the emptiness of winter, you might be setting yourself up for a fall.
If these feelings mainly hit during winter, it might be Seasonal Affective Disorder, and all you need is some light therapy and some vitamin d.
Your life will never have such an abundance of good looking young women who are open to new experiences and are all conveniently in your social circle by virtue of going to the same school as you do.
A lot of guys don't realize this, and look back on their college years wishing they had taken advantage of more opportunities at the time.
That is the cost of tying yourself down early.
“The greatest burden a child must bear is the unlived life of its parents.”
Carl Jung