Definite Red Flags for a LTR:
Smoker - maybe fine to have the odd cigarette while out drinking, but a girl that smokes cig's when she's sober is gross to me. Plus clearly has a problem making healthy choices that require a little will-power (eg giving up). On that score, how fucking easy is it to give up smoking these days, what with all the products, and it being all but outlawed anywhere inside. With all the health information out there, if you can't make the right choice and quit, you're a bum IMHO, man or women frankly.
Tattoos - Even aside from any sluttiness they may reveal, i find them aesthetically gross, and a sign of poor life choices / impulse control. When i see people with lots of tats, i think deep down they don't feel they are enough as they are, hence all the ink.
Excessive social media presence - Drama queen, attention whore tendencies. Anyone with an excessive amount of 'friends' online (anything north of 200 on FB i find odd tbh), the latter maybe not a dealbreaker, but a tick in that box for sure. The worst are the ones with loads of online 'friends' but few IRL. Minor bug-bear but girls that excessively post 'inspirational' quotes or 'self-help' slogans online, sometimes feels like they're "protesting too much" with all that shit.
Can't cook, or eats bad food - The latter is a definite dealbreaker in any kind of serious relationship, for obvious reasons. I eat super healthy, and even if someone can genetically eat pizzas on the reg and stay thin, it's not doing their health any good longterm. Eating healthily is a major part of my lifestyle, i've lived where girls in the past where our food consumption has been out of whack on this score, and it's a fucking nightmare. Especially if they are whiney about me buying 'boring food'. Can't be doing with it, and I won't compromise on that front.
Slobbish tendencies, barely working out or not playing sports - For obvious reasons. Even girls that dont put weight on, will go to pot later on, plus it shows a flippancy with their health and laziness that i find a major turn off.
Drinks to excess regularly. I mean binge drinking, slurring words level drunk. I like a drink myself from time to time, but for a women in her 30s to get hammered more than at the most once a month is a definite red flag.
Ones i'm flexible with -
Divorced parents and the like - as long as they are on decent terms and don't bad talk them overly, or talk about their childhood in a negative light. My parents divorced, i was raised for most part by a single mother, and while i recognise it's far from ideal, would feel hypocritical excluding anyone on that basis. Plus i think if people are smart they can learn from the mistakes of their families, as much as be doomed to repeat them.
Girls who've had abortions - Again, i've been had instances of these (not my womb personally, but hey). Yes it's a negative, but on one side you could say she's not letting herself be a victim of a shitty circumstance.
Girls who have (relatively) few friends - Honestly half the drama from girls comes from their friends. As long as she's got a couple of good friends, then i don't see that as either good or bad.
Smoker - maybe fine to have the odd cigarette while out drinking, but a girl that smokes cig's when she's sober is gross to me. Plus clearly has a problem making healthy choices that require a little will-power (eg giving up). On that score, how fucking easy is it to give up smoking these days, what with all the products, and it being all but outlawed anywhere inside. With all the health information out there, if you can't make the right choice and quit, you're a bum IMHO, man or women frankly.
Tattoos - Even aside from any sluttiness they may reveal, i find them aesthetically gross, and a sign of poor life choices / impulse control. When i see people with lots of tats, i think deep down they don't feel they are enough as they are, hence all the ink.
Excessive social media presence - Drama queen, attention whore tendencies. Anyone with an excessive amount of 'friends' online (anything north of 200 on FB i find odd tbh), the latter maybe not a dealbreaker, but a tick in that box for sure. The worst are the ones with loads of online 'friends' but few IRL. Minor bug-bear but girls that excessively post 'inspirational' quotes or 'self-help' slogans online, sometimes feels like they're "protesting too much" with all that shit.
Can't cook, or eats bad food - The latter is a definite dealbreaker in any kind of serious relationship, for obvious reasons. I eat super healthy, and even if someone can genetically eat pizzas on the reg and stay thin, it's not doing their health any good longterm. Eating healthily is a major part of my lifestyle, i've lived where girls in the past where our food consumption has been out of whack on this score, and it's a fucking nightmare. Especially if they are whiney about me buying 'boring food'. Can't be doing with it, and I won't compromise on that front.
Slobbish tendencies, barely working out or not playing sports - For obvious reasons. Even girls that dont put weight on, will go to pot later on, plus it shows a flippancy with their health and laziness that i find a major turn off.
Drinks to excess regularly. I mean binge drinking, slurring words level drunk. I like a drink myself from time to time, but for a women in her 30s to get hammered more than at the most once a month is a definite red flag.
Ones i'm flexible with -
Divorced parents and the like - as long as they are on decent terms and don't bad talk them overly, or talk about their childhood in a negative light. My parents divorced, i was raised for most part by a single mother, and while i recognise it's far from ideal, would feel hypocritical excluding anyone on that basis. Plus i think if people are smart they can learn from the mistakes of their families, as much as be doomed to repeat them.
Girls who've had abortions - Again, i've been had instances of these (not my womb personally, but hey). Yes it's a negative, but on one side you could say she's not letting herself be a victim of a shitty circumstance.
Girls who have (relatively) few friends - Honestly half the drama from girls comes from their friends. As long as she's got a couple of good friends, then i don't see that as either good or bad.