[Dr. Howard]

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He knows that I don't like him(she told him).
In the past he tried to invite us both to hang out with him.
I can't figure out what his game is, I don't want to hang out with this fag, prefer to punch him.

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I'm in a similar situation, and trying to think of how to deal with it is an interesting exercise. There are a couple of options which have been mentioned, including:
1). Confront the guy
2). Confront her
3). Go cold and induce dread in her

My opinions on all of them are:
1). I can't justify this because the guy is doing what guys do. It's expected, and honestly, should be happening, because who wants to date someone who no one except you thinks is hot. End result: confrontation leads to huge showing of weakness and beta. Avoid.

Does tact not exist in 2015? Maybe not with the general population of men it seems, but lets look at a shining example. Donald Trump. Does he walk across the debate stage and punch Jeb Bush in the face? No. Does he have an epic meltdown and refuse to participate in a debate because Jeb is there? No.

Trump knows tact, trump knows how to say "I don't like you, don't fuck with me" while still sharing the stage with Jeb, and making Jeb look like a retard by trying to do an angry high five.

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I can't justify this because the guy is doing what guys do. It's expected, and honestly, should be happening, because who wants to date someone who no one except you thinks is hot.

wrong. If a girl, lets say my wife, is out at the gym and some guy comes tells her that she is doing her squats wrong etc. Even if I am there, I will chuckle to myself and continue to go about my business. That guy doesn't know who I am, he's never met me, he doesn't know thats my wife. So yeah, of course he will hit on her...thats what guys do.

If I'm out at the gym, and a regular, who I have talked to, whom knows that I am married to this woman is not only hitting on her, but is working in sets with her, and is planning his workout times during the day to be there at the same time AND work out with her. You had better fucking believe I am going to be inserting myself into that situation. It isn't for my wife's sake, as she probably is attracted to the guy if she is cooperating and letting it happen. It is for my sake, that dude is stepping into my sandbox, he knows who I am and is disrespecting me and thats not going to continue under my nose without me making it very uncomfortable for the both of them.

That is the difference here, its not 'just what guys do'

What would trump do if Jeb was taking his wife out to dinner? Would he punch him in the face on TV? No. Would he release a sex tape of him banging his troll wife? No. He would pull Jeb aside and say something like "Jeb, your friendship with my wife isn't going to work out. Its just not, trust me" End of Conversation. That is tact, its not causing a scene or showing weakness. When Jeb stops calling Trumps wife and she says "Donald! Did you say something to Jeb?!" Trump just says "What, Jeb and I are friends, we are allowed to talk"

@OP. You got trolled by this guy. Your reaction is what every girlfriend swooper wants. A girl's boyfriend having antisocial, but non confrontational reactions is the best situation for an interloper. I can almost GUARANTEE that when you declined the invite your girlfriend told this guy that you were being "weird, antisocial, a loser" etc. Its a game of chicken and you test your girlfriend. You accept his invite, go and hang out and then declare that "we have to get going, lets go honey" if she whines, or wants to stay with the guy by herself...Game over, next that bitch quick, she is already on his dick in her mind.

Last, you have bad frame with viewing him as a 'fag that you'd prefer to punch'. He is your adversary, and has intelligence if not a high level of game. You need to learn to be political and how to make him think that your bitch's notch is not worth the hassle. I'm sure he enjoys his professional job and generally non stressful life more than a new pussy. Remind him of that if he doesn't get the first hint.

Last.
If this all seems like too much effort, then don't be in an LTR and definitely don't get married. You WILL have these standoffs if you are married to a hot woman, trust me.