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What's the most busted lizard you ever poked?

What's the most busted lizard you ever poked?

Was supposed to meet this girl off tinder at a club, she looked "ok" in the pics and I was traveling. Didn't see her inside and I'm not gonna just sit around and wait for her, met some other chick on the dance floor and was making out with her and tried to get her home, she said she couldn't because she's super catholic and she actually stopped mid-makeout to see if I was religious.

Anyway, club closes and I walk outside after getting her number (might as well) and this chick is calling my name, so I walk over and she's with a few friends. Her guy friend says "you should fuck him" and I'm just happy he's not trying to cock block, I think he just wanted to get rid of her so he could isolate the other chick. So I tell her lets go and we walk back to the place I was staying at about 15 minutes away, hoping she might magically lose 30lbs during the walk.

She was sucking me off but her being overweight and me being drunk as fuck was making it difficult. Finally I started banging her but I was only at like 60% and to be honest I didn't even know if I was inside her or it was just my dick rubbing against her thunder thighs, still finished so what difference does it make to me. She hung around till the morning and I thought I'd give it another go but when morning came I just wanted to get her out of there unseen.

Funny thing is, when I first talked to her she was like "Am I ok?" as if saying, "I know I'm fat and probably a 4/10 but will you fuck me anyway?"
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