This has happened to me several times as well. Like the others have said you're escalating too quickly and triggering their ASD. My biggest complaint about the traditional pickup and seduction advice is when I hear someone say "oh just go as far as you can on the first date and even if you are only able to finger them you'll close the deal on the next date." WRONG! Almost without fail, women will give you ONE opportunity to make a play for sex and if you fall short you will never see her again. So with that being said choose your one shot wisely. Keep the following points in mind next time you're on a first date:
Starting off with coffee or ice cream is great but if you're really vibing with the girl try to get her to a second venue. For example you meet for coffee, talk for a couple of hours and then say "hey, let's grab a real drink now" and you go directly to a pub for a beer and sit at the bar.
Escalate physically but do not kiss her unless you're in a place where you can comfortably have sex. Some women are fine with car sex but if you have your own place or hers is nearby opt for that. I can't tell you how many times I've messed this step up. I'm feeling the desire, I want her to see how I go after what I want and I grab her and kiss her. It feels great in the moment but it lets the sexual air out of the balloon so to speak. Resist this urge!
If you get the vibe while you're on your coffee date that it's going to take work get her into bed, there's no harm in cutting the date short and later on going for a second date since you didn't kiss her or over escalate yet. There's a well known blogger named "Blackdragon" who preaches this kind of dating model. He goes on a 1 hour coffee or drink date, physically escalates, talks about sex but doesn't kiss her. He then plans second dates at his home and fucks the girls almost immediately. It's not everyone's style but it's something to consider.
Starting off with coffee or ice cream is great but if you're really vibing with the girl try to get her to a second venue. For example you meet for coffee, talk for a couple of hours and then say "hey, let's grab a real drink now" and you go directly to a pub for a beer and sit at the bar.
Escalate physically but do not kiss her unless you're in a place where you can comfortably have sex. Some women are fine with car sex but if you have your own place or hers is nearby opt for that. I can't tell you how many times I've messed this step up. I'm feeling the desire, I want her to see how I go after what I want and I grab her and kiss her. It feels great in the moment but it lets the sexual air out of the balloon so to speak. Resist this urge!
If you get the vibe while you're on your coffee date that it's going to take work get her into bed, there's no harm in cutting the date short and later on going for a second date since you didn't kiss her or over escalate yet. There's a well known blogger named "Blackdragon" who preaches this kind of dating model. He goes on a 1 hour coffee or drink date, physically escalates, talks about sex but doesn't kiss her. He then plans second dates at his home and fucks the girls almost immediately. It's not everyone's style but it's something to consider.