frenchie, I'll give you what might seem like a strange piece of advice.

Starting ASAP, and throughout the summer (so until the end of August) do the following:

Find a place where you can lie out in the sun basically naked -- only wearing swimming trunks if you need to.

2 or 3 times a week, go there around noon (between 11am and 1pm) and lie down in the sun for an equal number of minutes on each side. No sunscreen!

Start from just 5 minutes per side, and slowly build it up to where you're tanning about 15-20 minutes per side. Do not exceed 20 minutes per side.

Do that over the summer and see if by July theology doesn't move a little lower on your list of priorities...

I felt like that the past five months or so. I was trying to fight it and make myself want to meet chicks but there was no use. I still got laid a couple times but thats just because I was at a couple party's. I have been on chill mode for the past two months and only in the last couple days have I found the motivation to get back into it.

Must be something in the water or maybe it's the GMO's.

But try taking a couple months off, french. The desire will come back.

Frenchie yeah IDK what's up man, I'm 27, I get a full on rager just thinking about the hunt, women, and dominating them in bed. Lost my virginity when i was 15, been banging ever since, and it hasn't stopped.

I will admit I am crippled by easy access of girls through online dating. I feel like my game is in its infancy when it comes to cold approaching & day game. However, I do have a main girl that could be LTR, this doesn't mean I'm going to stop gaming.

But what I've noticed is there ARE time where I'd rather focus on myself such career and fitness wise.

What finance book do you recommend for beginner's?

I had a similar issue; my desire for sex was at an all time low for almost a year until I got with my Ukrainian ex. She literally awakened my libido 10x more than any woman I had ever been with before. Sex with other girls has never been the same since
Fuck I need to get back there..

Everything goes through periods of expansion and contraction.

I've found I have periods where I'm less interested in women, sex, and relationships. I may be going through one now.

Often this occurs because I'm playing on a level I already know, am bored of that game, and need to play a new one.

Keep in mind, eternal bachelorhood combined with the ability to approach women is a relatively new phenomenon. The modern mating dance is very new in the world. While we're evolved to mate, I'm not sure everyone is evolved to pursue sex the way we do now (smartphones, conversation with strangers, etc.)

See if you can get really specific about what you're feeling. Maybe you're tired of night clubs or a certain type of woman. Maybe you're tired of hunting, and want a relationship. Maybe you're tired of having to introduce yourself and want to build a social circle. I can't answer that for you. But explore and just notice when the apathy comes up.

And of course, check your testosterone and health. Get a blood test. Make sure you're getting enough vitamin D. It's amazing how my sex drive rockets after a couple heavy workouts.

This community has a heavy emphasis on game because we know how much fun it is, but I have other friends who have zero interest in it. Some art single, and some got married in their early twenties, and they are perfectly happy. It's your life. More of what you don't want won't make you happy. Good luck.

Quote: (05-07-2014 08:26 AM)frenchie Wrote:  

For this forum, my notch count is below average (35) but I feel satisfied with that number and journey which helped me understand what women really want.

Has this happened to anyone else? Don't get me wrong, I still love women and look forward to a new lay but the thrill of the hunt has gone down considerably. I'd rather invest my time into other pursuits. Maybe dare I say it.... a long term relationship!!!

Will my lustful passion ever come back?

Dude I think you're doing pretty good to be honest, you say you're only 24 and your notch count is below average at 35?.... Personally I'd say that's pretty good, especially when most guys don't really hit their peak until their late 20's to mid 30's....

A problem I think guys have when they get on this forum is it sets a new "metric" of what is "successful", while 35 notches at the age of 24 is probably in the top 20% of guys at that age, when a guy gets deep into the forum, he starts thinking that he is "below average" when he compares himself to the "super players" of the RVF.

In reality, we don't know how many notches a guy truly has, nor should we care... We don't know if he's banged 100 4's and 5's, would that be more admirable than a guy who has only banged 4 women that were all 8s-9's?

Also another aspect of this forum that I think may do more harm than good sometimes is the absolute hate and ridicule for those who end up with a girlfriend in an LTR, like that is some kind of mortal sin or monumental failure.

Personally, I'm thinking that if you get a good quality girl that you like and is hot, and you get along well you may be a fool not to get into a relationship, especially if the alternative is 4 nights out a week running around like a chicken with its' head cut off trying to spit game at a lot of 6-7's with horrible attitudes.

Finally, I'd say if your 24 and you've lost your sex drive there may be cause for concern, lack of motivation to actively game is not the same as a loss in sex drive, so I wouldn't confuse them. I think it's quite common and sometimes even healthy for a guy to burn out on gaming, it can happen to any of us. It can be exhausting, between reading the forum, reading books, going out, getting drunk, spending money, exerting energy on approaches, getting rejected, etc.... It can take a toll.

This too shall pass...

Its comes and goes. C'est la vie. Everybody cycles through down and high phases.

Just wait till the booty short comes out!

Isn't there something called the "Law of Diminishing Returns"???

If you do something over and over again, you gradually receive less pleasure from doing it.

Sometimes we need a new "drug", a new "high".

Things can get boring.

Take a break from girls. Master a new hobby. Focus on money or something productive.

Girls will always be there when you want them.

There is no shame is pursuing other hobbies.

I don't know who Justin Biebers new gf is

Quote: (05-07-2014 01:20 PM)The Lizard of Oz Wrote:  

frenchie, I'll give you what might seem like a strange piece of advice.

Starting ASAP, and throughout the summer (so until the end of August) do the following:

Find a place where you can lie out in the sun basically naked -- only wearing swimming trunks if you need to.

2 or 3 times a week, go there around noon (between 11am and 1pm) and lie down in the sun for an equal number of minutes on each side. No sunscreen!

Start from just 5 minutes per side, and slowly build it up to where you're tanning about 15-20 minutes per side. Do not exceed 20 minutes per side.

Do that over the summer and see if by July theology doesn't move a little lower on your list of priorities...

Haha funny you say that, I do suffer from a lack of vitamin D which I supplement now. That was affecting my T levels a year ago as well. Like I said, there is no shortage of testosterone in my body.

@Soup, I would do horrible things to Bieber's new girlfriend. However much like Bieber, I feel I shouldn't have to put in any effort to get the girl besides being present and talking about things that interest me and gauging some stuff she's into. At the risk of sounding like a game denialist, she should be drawn into my orbit not the other way around.

Gotta work on being more connected in various social circles.

Quote: (05-07-2014 03:06 PM)frenchie Wrote:  

Quote: (05-07-2014 01:20 PM)The Lizard of Oz Wrote:  

frenchie, I'll give you what might seem like a strange piece of advice.

Starting ASAP, and throughout the summer (so until the end of August) do the following:

Find a place where you can lie out in the sun basically naked -- only wearing swimming trunks if you need to.

2 or 3 times a week, go there around noon (between 11am and 1pm) and lie down in the sun for an equal number of minutes on each side. No sunscreen!

Start from just 5 minutes per side, and slowly build it up to where you're tanning about 15-20 minutes per side. Do not exceed 20 minutes per side.

Do that over the summer and see if by July theology doesn't move a little lower on your list of priorities...

Haha funny you say that, I do suffer from a lack of vitamin D which I supplement now. That was affecting my T levels a year ago as well. Like I said, there is no shortage of testosterone in my body.

I'm not surprised. You will get more, and more lasting, vitamin D and downstream androgen production from a summer of controlled gradually increasing noontime sun exposure as described above than from even the best supplementation.

Do this and report on the effects in a couple of months.

Quote: (05-07-2014 03:14 PM)The Lizard of Oz Wrote:  

Quote: (05-07-2014 03:06 PM)frenchie Wrote:  

Quote: (05-07-2014 01:20 PM)The Lizard of Oz Wrote:  

frenchie, I'll give you what might seem like a strange piece of advice.

Starting ASAP, and throughout the summer (so until the end of August) do the following:

Find a place where you can lie out in the sun basically naked -- only wearing swimming trunks if you need to.

2 or 3 times a week, go there around noon (between 11am and 1pm) and lie down in the sun for an equal number of minutes on each side. No sunscreen!

Start from just 5 minutes per side, and slowly build it up to where you're tanning about 15-20 minutes per side. Do not exceed 20 minutes per side.

Do that over the summer and see if by July theology doesn't move a little lower on your list of priorities...

Haha funny you say that, I do suffer from a lack of vitamin D which I supplement now. That was affecting my T levels a year ago as well. Like I said, there is no shortage of testosterone in my body.

I'm not surprised. You will get more, and more lasting, vitamin D and downstream androgen production from a summer of controlled gradually increasing noontime sun exposure as described above than from even the best supplementation.

Do this and report on the effects in a couple of months.

Will do, the winter has been horrible. This warmth is needed.

To the gent who asked finance questions, I've been reading Investopedia and throwing money into the wind to learn how it all works. I would not do what I do unless you're willing to lose it all. I only learn from hard mistakes anyway.

Do not take his advice on sun exposure. Sun photoages white skin the second you step outside. If you want to look good into your 30's and 40's, then you need to protect your skin.

Always wear facial sunscreen, and for extended trips in the sun put sunscreen on the entire body. You can get pretty much all of the vitamin D you need via supplements and just letting your arms get hit with the sun when you do random errands outside is enough for white skin.

Look it up. White skin produces vitamin D 3x-5x faster than darker skin. You don't need much sun if you're white. Whites evolved out of the Ice Age when sunlight was minimal.

If we're on about getting t-levels up I suggest deadlifts. I challenge any man to get above 2 times his bodyweight and not have an excess of the T fluid floating around his eyeballs between rest days.

Girls wouldn't know what hit them.

Samseau, are you worried that frenchie's soon-to-be-surging test levels might distract him from his tender theological ministrations?

I'm not sure how carefully you read my post, but here as elsewhere, the details matter (seems to be my theme for the day).

While it's true that it's not a good idea for a white dude to spend hours roasting in the sun, that is not what is being suggested here. No one's skin is going to be "photoaged" by gradually building a base tan starting from minimal exposures of 5 minutes a side, and building up to a maximum of 15-20 minutes a side for 2-3 days a week during the summer only. I've done this for many summers in a row and my skin looks like that of a man 10-12 years younger.

The other important detail is that this should be done around noon because this appears to provide the optimal UVA/UVB mix (the UVA/UVB ratio in natural sunlight varies over the course of the day).

People in western countries went way, way too far in their exaggerated fear of skin cancers and overuse of sunscreen, with the result that the bigger problem now is not too much sun but too little, particularly for men who work indoors (ie the great majority at this point). I believe that this trend is almost entirely responsible for the decline in free test levels observed in western men over the past few generations.

There is more and more evidence that if you want to live a long and healthy life, maybe the single most important thing is to have sufficient levels of vitamin D in your body. And while supplementation with D can be valuable, it is almost certainly the case that you cannot achieve durable levels of D with the same effectiveness from supplementation as you can from natural sunlight. The good thing is that a summer's worth of sunlight exposure using this regimen can give you a store of it that you can essentially use for the remainder of the year.

Finally, nothing ages a man more in every way than a life lived at low androgen levels. That, and not a few photons hitting your skin, is the real thing to consider here.

You want healthy sun?

Do high grade tanning beds like the Matrix bed. 1 session a week for 15min and you'll be straight.

Yes, back in the day the beds were unhealthy, but now beds like the Matrix are around 98% healthy rays and 2% 'bad' rays.

I tan regularly, have since I was 16yo and my skin looks great. A nice glow, tan enough and my skin is clear and even.

Give it a shot. Also it's great because you can pop in the tanning salon, get it done and not waste time.

The last perk is the girls working at salons are usually cute and easy to pull. Nothing like smashing a shop girl in a tanning bed and then getting a free package.

It's true that tanning beds have gotten better, but there are very likely real advantages to getting natural sunlight in the summer over all other modes of receiving your does of UV.

I feel OP

I think this winter and lack of sunlight have lowered my libido as well

But no worries I've focused more on self-improvement some weight and just really focused

Some refreshing honesty on this thread.

A welcome surprise from what I thought would be a string of one-upsmanship, status jockeying, and shaming comments.

First off, just chill. No reason to freak out (yet). It's common for men to want to go through changes in their dating and mating habits.

It doesn't sound like you have any physical problems. You are just wanting to have a relationship. You are getting tired of running around and followings the same old patterns. Nothing wrong with that.

Take a layoff. Take a break. Do something else. Change your usual patterns. Shake up your life a bit. The shock to your routine will do you good.

Quote: (05-07-2014 09:43 AM)Onto Wrote:  

I feel the same way. I'm 43 and have banged, I don't even know, 70, 80, 90 girls in my life. Most of them bieng in my teens and 20's The older I got, the less girls I had sex with. What becomes most important is quality, and I think the more you make yourself a quality person, the more life opens the door to being with a quality woman.

Sounds like a growth in self-development is what's occuring with you. Definately natural and a good thing for sure.

I am in the same boat as you..I am only 31 years old and definitely over 100 girls in the last few years.

I live in Las Vegas and it seems so damn easy here at times just to go out to nightclub or bar and grab some girl and bang her out. I get kind of tired of it honestly.

I haven't been able to do too much day game in general because of work related stuff.

One of my strongest beliefs is that "whatever you focus on you get.." and my focus has not been there. I've been focusing living abroad, becoming financially independent and I think women are on the back burner right now.

Hopefully its just a phase but honestly probably just a sign of maturity for me and you.

Quote: (05-07-2014 08:12 PM)The Lizard of Oz Wrote:  

words

Science:

I'm 20 and I have no desire to build a large notch count or an extensive history of lays to look back on when I'm older. I rather enjoy experiences when they come, understanding that I must make most of opportunities, or approach if I want to get laid. But I'm starting to see more and more that girls come and go.

Don't get me wrong, I love variety and I love getting a new lay, but whenever I do I'm satisfied and can go a month or two comfortably without having a new girl. I'm also exploring 'mini-relationships' for the first time.

Last year was a big 'game' year for me, really. This year so far has been more of a lifestyle focus and overall self-improvement. I wonder where this will take me..

I've been experiencing the same issue for the past 3 months so I definitely feel you. I'm lacking the motivation to push myself to game girls. I only started seriously doing this October of last year so I'm not anywhere experienced in game like you guys on the forum. But I did get a few bangs during my journey but they all ended early this year.

That might be the reason which triggered my negative spiral and really questioned wtf am I doing with my life. Before I would just go to work and day game(plus no-fap, working out). It was fun because I thought I was progressing toward becoming better with women and hitting the goals I set for myself. I guess the stress from work and the 2 girls I was with left me got to me. I was depressed. I quit my job and didn't really have an aim in life. I thought about what is the meaning of life along other with complicated questions. I was having an existential crisis as well.

I did some research and found Ayahuasca. After reading about it and other people's life changing experiences, I saw Ayahuasca as hope for me. I booked a retreat in Peru which I'm about to go in June. Hopefully, it will clear up some of my first world problems for me and give me some guidance in life.

Nomad77 started a couple of threads about how man is now nothing but a cheap ho, 99% and Roosh's how to be a good clown, resonated with me well because that's how I felt when I'm with a woman looking back. I feel like I'm masking my true self by putting on a show. It's funny how after I did my 100 approach challenge, I was confident and way more social with everyone. Now I'm back where I'm started and I think I've even regressed beyond that because I'm thinking what's the point anyways. Also, I'm way less social because of smoking/dealing weed which made me super paranoid but that's another story.

Another forum member said "the juice isn't worth the squeeze". That's how I feel about dating girls in America now. The MGTOW philosophy appealed to me in that regard but I still wanna get my sexual needs met though. It's like the saying "Women can't live with them. Can't live without them." That's the conflict I'm having with my inner self. My big head is struggling to fight my little head. In the meantime, I'm planning my escape outta here by learning how to program and become location independent.