Quote: (11-03-2013 05:07 PM)The Lizard of Oz Wrote:
Well, first of all she may or may not be pregnant. She could be lying and home tests are not necessarily reliable. First, make sure you find out what the reality is.
If she isn't pregnant then obviously you never fuck her again and you're good to go.
If she is pregnant, I think the best course of action might be the following:
1. Make it clear to her that you have no interest in children and marriage. Make it clear that if she gives birth to a child you will never see the child and will not be a father to it in any way.
2. Tell her the next time you talk to her or see her again has to be after she's either had an abortion or you taking her to the abortion clinic. Make it clear that you will see her again, but only under those circumstances.
3. Offer her to pay for the abortion even if she can afford it.
Since the girl is obsessed with you, the child is her way of trying to keep you. So your strategy has to be to make her think that what she is doing is guaranteed to achieve the opposite goal: she will certainly lose you if she keeps the child, but you're open to seeing her again if she doesn't.
Your tone throughout should be gentle but firm. If she just feels scorned and rejected, being a woman she may go through with it purely out of spite. But if you make it clear that you are rejecting the child but not her, that in fact the only way for her to hold on to you is not to have a child you're not ready for, and that this is the only way she'll ever see you or talk to you or fuck you again, then you could turn her obsession with you to your advantage.
I think this is sound advice. It is, however "Plan A." You need to come up with a Plan B in case she insists on having the child.
Here's the deal regarding child support. If she never files for child support, you have no obligation to provide support whatsoever. Neither the court system, nor anyone else except for her really knows that you exist. If she does file for child support, you have no obligation to respond to anything or appear anywhere until you are served with papers. They can't screw you in court if you have absolutely no notice that you have anything pending. In my state, even if the mother files a Complaint for Child Support, the father has absolutely no obligation to pay any support which accrued before the date of filing the Complaint. For example, if the mother waits until the child is fourteen years old to file a Complaint for Child Support, the most the father could be on the hook for would be four years. Some states are different and the mother can seek support which accrued prior to filing the Complaint.
If you don't resolve this matter through Plan A, my strong recommendation is that you immediately change your cell number (if that is possible) and that you cut off all contact from this girl. If in the future, you are served with papers, request a paternity test and see if you can work something out with this girl which would include her dismissing the Complaint and you not being hit with an Order to pay child support. Again, if she does file a Complaint, they need to find you in order to serve you with paperwork. Part of the way that I took care of the over $250,000 debt which I previously had (in addition to paying off over $100,000 of it) was that people often couldn't find me to serve me with paperwork, lawsuits got dismissed, and the statute of limitations ran. Some people's lifestyles make them more prone to be served with paperwork. Hermits get served. People who sit on the couch watching porn and playing video games get served. People like me who spend all of their time on the street, in the gym, and working are more difficult to catch.
If you do decide to pay her anything, which I don't recommend at this point, make sure it is by check or money order. Women constantly lie in claiming that they didn't receive cash.