Mental, typically that's what I would advocate for as well but in this situation: (1) it's 3 against 1 and they keep having these intervention-style meetings where they gang up on me and (2) they got to know me as a shy, passive "nice guy" type and they're alarmed by the change to a take-no-shit cocky asshole ... turning it into a confrontation only cements their concern and gets them farther up my ass. I've learned that in a group you can be tough initially and then add in "niceness" later but if you start nice and go tough you always get labeled a problem.
Guerrilla, the two changes that disturb them are the aggression and the manipulative approach to women (and to a certain extent, life itself). These guys are all party guys and we all drink and do drugs together all the time. One dude is gay but the other two actually like picking up girls. They're just not methodical about it. One guy is a total natural and he's White Knighting me re: respect for women ... the other guy could really benefit from being taken under my wing because he has the desire and could kill but he's too passive to come out of his shell and go after what he wants.
Storm, work is an area of concern because the company I work for is struggling ... since getting back into game, my own performance at work has actually improved but I'm not in the driver's seat and there's only so much I will do for them given what they are paying me. In terms of neglected hobbies — my friends are citing that I don't smoke pot, sit on the couch, and watch TV with them as much as I used to. Well,no shit — that's a dead-end. I'd rather be on here keeping the saw sharp then letting it go dull. The only other hobby I have is a nascent interest in MMA but that just feeds their concerns that I'm getting too aggressive.
As to gaming my friends — no, I do not. I am open and honest with my friends ... perhaps too honest. It would have behooved me to play my transformation closer to the vest as I've done a lot of thinking out loud to these guys over the last few months as these concepts and behaviors have taken root and they've seen me stumble and push things too far at times as I've worked to find the optimum settings. The fact that I am so open about my transformation rattles their cage. These are the kind of guys who believe "be yourself" is good advice. It is when it means "absorb these concepts so your behavior is natural" ... but when it means "stay the same and hope for different results", it's not.
re: the lizard in question — their problems with her are related to:
(1) a single obnoxious incident where she was going through a emotional patch late one night and needed a place to vent so I invited her over (I got a *hell* of a bang out of it BTW) ... frankly the hottest girls are often the most volatile. That comes with the territory but these guys don't have the stomach for it ... I don't necessarily blame them; crazy bitches are an acquired taste but it's a flavor I enjoy.
(2) the fact that she's a professional escort, which makes no difference to me ... if anything it confirms the value of what I get for free (which is to say, in exchange for knowing how to strum her harp) and it means I have to stay extra sharp and in control to avoid getting played which gives me that stimulation that's often lacking in a garden-variety girl ... but to these White Knights prostitution is the ultimate disrespect for women and they won't allow a girl who engages in that line of work to come in our house ... not because they actually have any experience with sex workers of any kind but because they are prejudiced and afraid of something outside their comfort zone. (In hindsight, I never should have told them what this lizard does for a living but I wanted to brag about the pull — I'll have to charge that one to the game.)
I tried throwing it in their face by saying what if she was a stripper or a porn star and Mr. Natural White Knight — who got all fuckin' goggly-eyed the first time I brought this girl home — actually said with a straight face he wouldn't want that type of girl in our house either ... although homeboy who could use my help broke out in a big ass smile when I dropped that one.
I don't want to make this about a single lizard because what's one lizard? It's the fact that *my boys* want to hold me back that pisses me off. And since explaining this stuff to them isn't working, that leads me to only one conclusion: despite their good intentions, they simply do not understand me ... and that means I need to walk.
Luckily I got a buddy who is more receptive to this kind of lifestyle and supports my transformation who may have a room that just opened up in his place ... ironically a room formerly occupied by the only other female ever banned from our house — a bat-shit crazy Coyote Ugly bartender type who hands out blowjobs like handshakes. I'm grabbing a beer with this buddy tomorrow to float the idea of moving in with him at least on a temporary basis.
Ultimately, I need my own place.
To quote Keith Richards, sometimes you gotta walk before they make you run...