I've never been a fan of the "bang on the first date" method. In my opinion, there is too much risk of getting accused of sexual assault, and I'm not really good looking enough to pull it off. I feel creepy trying to get a girl back to my house on the first date, and any woman who would bang the likes of me that easily is probably trouble...
That being said, obviously, you don't want to take a girl out on 10 dates only to get a peck on the cheek, and told you're "a really good friend." After buying her a steak dinner. 10 times.
What's worked for me is the three date method. It goes like this... (the fourth, the fifth, the minor fall and the major lift)
Date 1: Somewhere near her house - not mine. Assuming you met online, she might end up looking nothing like she does in pictures. You do not want to be seen with women who are not hot in your area, or within your social circle. The first date should be very casual - a few drinks or coffee. Minimal investment of time and money.
Dinner or movies on a first date is way too big an investment into someone you don't know. If you're not into her, you don't want to blow cash and you want to be able to bounce quickly.
Pointer: Never ever follow up text her something like "I had a nice time with you" or "I'd like to see you again." If the woman is interested, in 99.9% of instances she will send you a follow up text. Every first date I've converted ended with a text along the lines of "Hank, it was so fun hanging out with you, we should do it again!" However, every single time I've sent a text along those lines, I got blown out.
Follow up text from her is usually the green light.
Date 2: Once I've established that I'm interested, this is where I will class it up. Granted, I have a taste for finer things, so taking women out to a nice restaurant is fun for me. What's really fun is to take her to a BYO and bring appropriate alcohol. I.e., if you go to a French place, bring Calvados and a French wine. Be able to talk intelligently about it. For instance, if I'm at a French place, I'll explain the overproduction of apples in France, which lead to production of Calvados.
You don't need to be a genius, just look some random shit up on Wikipedia and repeat it. This is crazy easy to do. Just be an authority on something.
If you're short on cash, you can go bowling, hiking, kayaking, art museum, or really any one on one activity.
The key on date two is to do something cultured.
Pointer: You have to escalate on the second date. Go for a kiss, hold her hand, put your hand in the small of her back, etc. Physical escalation is an absolute must. If she agreed to a second date, she won't be cold to this.
Date 3: This is where you get the bang. You should have a bar, near your house, where everyone knows you by name. I have a few when I walk in, all the hot female bartenders are like "Hi Hank! Your usual?" To establish this, just be friendly to the bartenders and tip really well
Bringing her to your "home bar" is a quick way to establish social proof and that you're not a creeper. At this point, she's gone on three dates with you, and she wants to bang. Now she knows that people like and respect you.
Pointer: By this time, it should be easy. She's very comfortable around you. You're cool. You have good friends and keep good company. When you say "Let's go back to my place and open a bottle of wine", there will be zero resistance.
Once you're at your place, be chill. Put your arm around her on the couch, let her cuddle with you, and make out a bit. Don't do weird shit like try and shove your fingers down her throat. Do not try and rush the bang like it needs to happen in 20 minutes. Light kissing is incredibly effective. Save the real kinky shit for later bangs, definitely not the first one. Just make out with her, kiss her on the forehead, cuddle with her, etc.
If you're watching movies, I always go with something nostalgic. This is an incredible comfort builder. Throw on Clueless and a 90s playlist. Boom.
The reason I like the three date method is this:
- Virtually impossible to claim sexual assault / #metoo. She will have sent you like 50 million texts by now expressing interest
- Builds comfort and makes sex almost too easy. By the time you're finished the third date, she will practically be begging you to "see your place" (i.e. put her lingerie on your floor).
- Easily converts into an LTR if you're into that. You can also keep her as a FWB or more formally date her, depending what you're into.
- Lets you weed out annoying girls in preference of girls you actually enjoy hanging out with
Anything beyond 3 dates and you're wasting time. She isn't interested. You're literally a meal ticket and cheap entertainment.
That's what has worked for me. Your milage may vary.
That being said, obviously, you don't want to take a girl out on 10 dates only to get a peck on the cheek, and told you're "a really good friend." After buying her a steak dinner. 10 times.
What's worked for me is the three date method. It goes like this... (the fourth, the fifth, the minor fall and the major lift)
Date 1: Somewhere near her house - not mine. Assuming you met online, she might end up looking nothing like she does in pictures. You do not want to be seen with women who are not hot in your area, or within your social circle. The first date should be very casual - a few drinks or coffee. Minimal investment of time and money.
Dinner or movies on a first date is way too big an investment into someone you don't know. If you're not into her, you don't want to blow cash and you want to be able to bounce quickly.
Pointer: Never ever follow up text her something like "I had a nice time with you" or "I'd like to see you again." If the woman is interested, in 99.9% of instances she will send you a follow up text. Every first date I've converted ended with a text along the lines of "Hank, it was so fun hanging out with you, we should do it again!" However, every single time I've sent a text along those lines, I got blown out.
Follow up text from her is usually the green light.
Date 2: Once I've established that I'm interested, this is where I will class it up. Granted, I have a taste for finer things, so taking women out to a nice restaurant is fun for me. What's really fun is to take her to a BYO and bring appropriate alcohol. I.e., if you go to a French place, bring Calvados and a French wine. Be able to talk intelligently about it. For instance, if I'm at a French place, I'll explain the overproduction of apples in France, which lead to production of Calvados.
You don't need to be a genius, just look some random shit up on Wikipedia and repeat it. This is crazy easy to do. Just be an authority on something.
If you're short on cash, you can go bowling, hiking, kayaking, art museum, or really any one on one activity.
The key on date two is to do something cultured.
Pointer: You have to escalate on the second date. Go for a kiss, hold her hand, put your hand in the small of her back, etc. Physical escalation is an absolute must. If she agreed to a second date, she won't be cold to this.
Date 3: This is where you get the bang. You should have a bar, near your house, where everyone knows you by name. I have a few when I walk in, all the hot female bartenders are like "Hi Hank! Your usual?" To establish this, just be friendly to the bartenders and tip really well
Bringing her to your "home bar" is a quick way to establish social proof and that you're not a creeper. At this point, she's gone on three dates with you, and she wants to bang. Now she knows that people like and respect you.
Pointer: By this time, it should be easy. She's very comfortable around you. You're cool. You have good friends and keep good company. When you say "Let's go back to my place and open a bottle of wine", there will be zero resistance.
Once you're at your place, be chill. Put your arm around her on the couch, let her cuddle with you, and make out a bit. Don't do weird shit like try and shove your fingers down her throat. Do not try and rush the bang like it needs to happen in 20 minutes. Light kissing is incredibly effective. Save the real kinky shit for later bangs, definitely not the first one. Just make out with her, kiss her on the forehead, cuddle with her, etc.
If you're watching movies, I always go with something nostalgic. This is an incredible comfort builder. Throw on Clueless and a 90s playlist. Boom.
The reason I like the three date method is this:
- Virtually impossible to claim sexual assault / #metoo. She will have sent you like 50 million texts by now expressing interest
- Builds comfort and makes sex almost too easy. By the time you're finished the third date, she will practically be begging you to "see your place" (i.e. put her lingerie on your floor).
- Easily converts into an LTR if you're into that. You can also keep her as a FWB or more formally date her, depending what you're into.
- Lets you weed out annoying girls in preference of girls you actually enjoy hanging out with
Anything beyond 3 dates and you're wasting time. She isn't interested. You're literally a meal ticket and cheap entertainment.
That's what has worked for me. Your milage may vary.
