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What would you do if you were in my shoes?
#1

What would you do if you were in my shoes?

Hi all,

I'm amazed by all sorts of stories I read here. You guys make travelling and living off the beat lifestyle sound like it's so damn easy. So I thought I'd post my current situation here and see if I can get some advice as I feel kind of stuck.

Here are some details:

I'm a 30 year old, 6"2, fair skinned Indian (good looking & athletic). Most foreigners I meet never believe I'm Indian at first sight.

I've been self-employed for over 3 years now and consistently make around $2000 a month in profit running a photography training business and I also teach online marketing to MBA students.

Hobbies: Photography, Skateboarding, Drumming and Working out

The problem is that I've started to feel really out of place in India. I really don't get along with ANYONE. i'm just not traditional and conservative.

For instance, here, people are crazy about all sorts of festivals and I find them so FUCKING GAY that I don't even bother to reply when people wish me.

In fact I find my country's culture to be highly feminine in nature and just not cool at all in any way.

Another point that makes me want to pull my hair out is that fact that 99.9% of the people here just work towards one thing - that is to get married. It's like even the youth is just unwilling to move away from the past and firmly clinging to this stupid tradition just to keep their parents satisfied. These people are willing to spend a crazy amount of money on their weddings, something which can so easily be turned into a life-changing investment if used wisely.

And lastly, the women. I don't know where the myth of the beautiful Indian woman came from. I find them to be not only one of the most ugliest but really really unwitty, unintelligent, childish and sloppy in the way they groom. In fact my best friend here is a Kenyan female whom I consider to be way more attractive than any of my Indian female friends.

In fact the truth is that I find 99% of Indians to be super ugly, unhygenic and just super sloppy. If there ever was a survey on grooming and looking sharp and good, India would be at the bottom of the pile for sure.

So the bottom line is that I want to move out but haven't got the slightest clue on what to do. I know countries like Canada and New Zeland are the typical options Indians take but the difference for me is that I'm not from the STEM field. So it's almost impossible for me to migrate to another country just by applying via an immigration program.

My life in India is not bad and I get laid consistently (thanks to game and the ineptness of the guys here 99% of whom are beta beyond imagination) but I'm not growing any younger and the only way to keep it all going would be to eventually get married, which is almost unimaginable to me.

I've almost started to feel suffocated here. The only thing working for me is my professional life. I work only 8 hours on weekdays and around 20 hours on weekends. And the best part is that my work is almost location independent in the sense that I just need a laptop and internet. But since it's not an online class, I need to do the classes physically so I cannot travel and earn in a foreign country since it would require some kind of sponsorship or business license.

So if you were in my shoes, what would be the immediate steps you would take?
I'm particularly looking for some bold answers as I'm a very spontaneous person and usually don't like to think long term. So basically, what would be the quickest way to get out of this s***hole?
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#2

What would you do if you were in my shoes?

You are in a tough spot. You likely cannot pick up and begin your business in a new country and would likely require a visa for most places to move.

Do you know anyone in another country that you would consider moving to? If you do, maybe they can get you an interview or potential job and then you can start up photography part time and re-build up. Otherwise, the only thing i can think of is take a few weeks or months and travel a bit. Doing so, you may find potential destination for yourself or maybe (high emphasis on maybe) that you will miss home, while abroad.
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#3

What would you do if you were in my shoes?

No idea, but I still wish you the best of luck.

I suppose if you really reach the end of your tether you could take a trip to Canada and then wife up a desperate post-wall woman until your citizenship is free and clear.

Not the best case scenario, but an option...

The public will judge a man by what he lifts, but those close to him will judge him by what he carries.
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#4

What would you do if you were in my shoes?

Considering permanently relocating seems impossible, I'd advise trying to make as much money as possible in order to afford frequent travel
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#5

What would you do if you were in my shoes?

Well firstly, the grass isn't always greener elsewhere.
I'd have thought somewhere like Mumbai MIGHT have some fantastic opports. Especially as you get wealthier and network into the "elite territory".

How about these places:-
Dubai/some of the M East.
Singapore.
Bits of East Asia eg Thailand, Malaysia. Even China?

You might not get a particularly warm welcome in some of England, Australia, E Europe and the like.
I wouldn't say they are racist. More that they feel an urge to counter a wave of globalism that they feel has harmed their countries.
Alternatively, you might find they're great for you.

I suspect by framing your application in the right way you could get to Australia/Canada. But the question is, would you really want to?

I'd have no interest in a Hindu, Sikh or Muslim woman, generally speaking. Too much to bridge, in my opinion. However, I remember some absolutely GORGEOUS Indian Catholic girls from my time in Mumbai and Goa. Have you targetted these?

Remember if your rivals are so useless, that can ONLY work in your favour!
Notice how the Westerners here don't tend to rate their own countries for women and the like!

My guess is that multi-ethnic places like Dubai/East Asia even Mumbai might be best for you.
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#6

What would you do if you were in my shoes?

Quote: (04-20-2017 06:53 AM)testos111 Wrote:  

...For instance, here, people are crazy about all sorts of festivals and I find them so FUCKING GAY that I don't even bother to reply when people wish me.

In fact I find my country's culture to be highly feminine in nature and just not cool at all in any way.

I feel you on this one. I got kind of annoyed at people wishing me Happy Easter.

I was raised Catholic but I'm not overly religious. I do believe in god, but why do people assume I'm Christian?
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#7

What would you do if you were in my shoes?

Mumbai is basically a toilet that somehow passes as a city. Apart from one or two areas (Bandra and south Mumbai), the whole place stinks, like literally. And the ultra nationalist politics there makes freedom of expression very restricted and fear inducing.

Dubai I fear may just be a case of going from the frying pan into the fire since I've heard it's not liberal either.

I just came back from a trip to Singapore and again found it too conservative though it's definitely world class. Thailand is no-no for me since I only want to go somewhere communication is not a problem. Unlike many here, I got super bored in the one month I spent in Bangkok. Very uninspiring that place, at least in my opinion.

I know I'm really not in a position to choose much but it's definitely not going to be those places. I'm currently learning Spanish with the hope that maybe it'll open up something in S.A.

Here are two bold moves I'm considering:

1. Head to UBC, Vancouver for a course in Digital Marketing. It's just a 6 month course and extremely cheap. It'll give me some exposure to Canada and maybe even allow me to test the viability of running my photography business there. If things work, then maybe apply for Canadian immigration since getting a degree from there and having stayed there gives you some vital points in the immigration process.

2. This one is slightly crazy but I'm travelling to San Francisco in June and I'm thinking of going there and walk around with the "Will give free hugs" board, like those stunts they show on Youtube, with the hope that I'll be able to entrap some gullible (even ugly) American woman and then get married to her.
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#8

What would you do if you were in my shoes?

Quote: (04-20-2017 10:27 AM)dark_g Wrote:  

Quote: (04-20-2017 06:53 AM)testos111 Wrote:  

...For instance, here, people are crazy about all sorts of festivals and I find them so FUCKING GAY that I don't even bother to reply when people wish me.

In fact I find my country's culture to be highly feminine in nature and just not cool at all in any way.

I feel you on this one. I got kind of annoyed at people wishing me Happy Easter.

I was raised Catholic but I'm not overly religious. I do believe in god, but why do people assume I'm Christian?

It's called being polite and being kind.

I'd rather have someone say that, then go on some athiestic rant and PC bullshit about how offended they are that I said happy easter.

Dude I'm brown, Indian, American, and I still say merry xmas, happy easter, etc, because it's polite if someone says it to you or if you're dealing with customers.
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#9

What would you do if you were in my shoes?

OP honestly I wouldn't get married for the wrong shitty reasons.

Absolutely get out of India and travel as much as you can.

People always LOVE taking photos you could make a killing out here, especially in Southern California.

Hell I'd probably pay you to help teach me how to use a camera if the rates were decent.

Think about how vain and attention whoring girls are - you could use camera game and pull hotties. Not to mention network and take photos at private events or parties.

Your photo talents are giving me all sorts of ideas of what you can do with it her.

Digital Marketing is YUGE out here as well, AND you're location independent ?

You can hope from country to country as you work, hell even pipeline photo courses for tourists and locals.


You've got 2 really good talents that are transferable anywhere, think about that.
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#10

What would you do if you were in my shoes?

Quote: (04-20-2017 11:13 AM)kaotic Wrote:  

Quote: (04-20-2017 10:27 AM)dark_g Wrote:  

Quote: (04-20-2017 06:53 AM)testos111 Wrote:  

...For instance, here, people are crazy about all sorts of festivals and I find them so FUCKING GAY that I don't even bother to reply when people wish me.

In fact I find my country's culture to be highly feminine in nature and just not cool at all in any way.

I feel you on this one. I got kind of annoyed at people wishing me Happy Easter.

I was raised Catholic but I'm not overly religious. I do believe in god, but why do people assume I'm Christian?

It's called being polite and being kind.

I'd rather have someone say that, then go on some athiestic rant and PC bullshit about how offended they are that I said happy easter.

Dude I'm brown, Indian, American, and I still say merry xmas, happy easter, etc, because it's polite if someone says it to you or if you're dealing with customers.

The word I used was "annoyed", not "Offended". I have no intentions to rant on anyone who wishes me Happy Easter. It's the assumption, not the greeting. I'm nice/polite also, If someone says good morning, I'll say good morning back.
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#11

What would you do if you were in my shoes?

Quote: (04-20-2017 11:34 AM)kaotic Wrote:  

OP honestly I wouldn't get married for the wrong shitty reasons.

Absolutely get out of India and travel as much as you can.

People always LOVE taking photos you could make a killing out here, especially in Southern California.

Hell I'd probably pay you to help teach me how to use a camera if the rates were decent.

Think about how vain and attention whoring girls are - you could use camera game and pull hotties. Not to mention network and take photos at private events or parties.

Your photo talents are giving me all sorts of ideas of what you can do with it her.

Digital Marketing is YUGE out here as well, AND you're location independent ?

You can hope from country to country as you work, hell even pipeline photo courses for tourists and locals.


You've got 2 really good talents that are transferable anywhere, think about that.

Thanks man and you're absolutely right. both the skills are trasnferable to another location but the problem is that I can only monetize them as a resident there, not as a tourist as it's illegal. Can definitely be used for chics though.
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#12

What would you do if you were in my shoes?

Quote: (04-20-2017 11:00 AM)testos111 Wrote:  

Mumbai is basically a toilet that somehow passes as a city. Apart from one or two areas (Bandra and south Mumbai), the whole place stinks, like literally. And the ultra nationalist politics there makes freedom of expression very restricted and fear inducing.

Dubai I fear may just be a case of going from the frying pan into the fire since I've heard it's not liberal either.

I just came back from a trip to Singapore and again found it too conservative though it's definitely world class. Thailand is no-no for me since I only want to go somewhere communication is not a problem. Unlike many here, I got super bored in the one month I spent in Bangkok. Very uninspiring that place, at least in my opinion.

I know I'm really not in a position to choose much but it's definitely not going to be those places. I'm currently learning Spanish with the hope that maybe it'll open up something in S.A.

Here are two bold moves I'm considering:

1. Head to UBC, Vancouver for a course in Digital Marketing. It's just a 6 month course and extremely cheap. It'll give me some exposure to Canada and maybe even allow me to test the viability of running my photography business there. If things work, then maybe apply for Canadian immigration since getting a degree from there and having stayed there gives you some vital points in the immigration process.

2. This one is slightly crazy but I'm travelling to San Francisco in June and I'm thinking of going there and walk around with the "Will give free hugs" board, like those stunts they show on Youtube, with the hope that I'll be able to entrap some gullible (even ugly) American woman and then get married to her.

I completely forgot about South America. As my personal preferences outside of W Europe are E Europe and some bits of SE Asia.

S America could be an absolutely terrific one for you. Fun culture, racial mix, good women, work opports for ex pats etc etc.

Maybe E Europe would be feasible for you too. I don't know.

But yes, Latin America would be excellent! Infact, I'd guess the top of the list.

As an aside, have you thought about China for a while too, if you fancy travelling and trying different places?
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#13

What would you do if you were in my shoes?

Quote: (04-20-2017 06:53 AM)testos111 Wrote:  

I also teach online marketing to MBA students.

If you teach online marketing to MBA students, then you must know quite a bit about it?

Why not focus on generating a passive online income and then you can travel wherever you feel like? and not be limited by where you can legally emigrate to
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#14

What would you do if you were in my shoes?

Quote: (04-20-2017 05:17 PM)slowpoke Wrote:  

Quote: (04-20-2017 06:53 AM)testos111 Wrote:  

I also teach online marketing to MBA students.

If you teach online marketing to MBA students, then you must know quite a bit about it?

Why not focus on generating a passive online income and then you can travel wherever you feel like? and not be limited by where you can legally emigrate to

This.

Testos111 your in a pretty good position right now even if your not in the place where you want to be. I would keep working hard where you are and save as much as possible. Step 2 would be to take what you know and make online products with the information you know and targeting people like the ones who currently pay you. I would do two things if I were you: something related to photography and something related to your online marketing specialty. You are a smart guy and I'm sure you can think of something you can do to translate your specialties to online products or services.

So building some online products, promote them and grow them, and eventually establish a reliable online income. Once your savings and online income reach the right level then you will have the freedom to spread your wings and find the best place for you.
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#15

What would you do if you were in my shoes?

Forget UBC. Vancouver in general. Here you're just another Indian. Weather sucks. Cost of living is high. And for a semi large metropolitan city the talent is mediocre at best. In my opinion Vancouver is one of the most overrated cities in the world.
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#16

What would you do if you were in my shoes?

OP, first of all I understand your frustration and commend your ability to transcend stereotypes but your disdain for your fellow Indians is quite disheartening.

India is my homeland and in my opinion, your gratuitous and generalized attempt to attack it are overly unjustified. I'm proud of who I am and transcend stereotypes of my race but do my best to respect my culture and respect differences. Now, Indians, especially men, have a bad reputation due to some fairly bad apples that make us look bad. Trust me that wound is very fresh and the rest of us don't need anyone to rub salt into it. You come in and do that in a grandstanding way. I mean, on a predominantly western forum, you will not receive much criticism for it.

Luckily, this forum is open enough that it allows for alternate perspectives. So I will say my piece in response to your very question of "What would you do in my shoes." First of all, I would stop shitting on the entire culture, your own culture. You are likely hanging out with the wrong people first of all. There are plenty of middle to upper class men and women in New Delhi or Mumbai that I could have a great time with. I know many of them and also keep in touch with them. They have more class than some Americans I know albeit their number is small. When I was in Delhi, I hung around with them and their families and they were nothing but hospitable, open, stylish and fun in my opinion.

You generally walk into an Indian home, you get treated like a god. That hospitality is unsurpassed to me. On top of that the art and culture, if you really decide to enjoy it, is some of the best out there, especially the classical music. I speak 2 Indian languages and still try to learn as much as possible about the culture because I'm genuinely interested. So this is not coming from a bad place.

Speaking of arranged marriages, that system was developed to keep classes within each other and to pass on your legacy. Yes, it's very traditional and makes no damn sense, but let's look at the other side. You have western forum members complaining how the western culture has gotten degenerative and women are not traditional anymore. Well, you have India where they are. Sure they are not stunners or even average but their existence and its purpose is not the same as it is for the west. Women over there toil and toil very hard to take care of not only their husbands and kids but also often times grandparents and others in the family. I mean most traditional Indian women can cook a hell of a meal. I don't care if they're ugly because I'm not trying to bang them. They just deserve my respect for following traditions and doing their best to keep their families happy. We kick and scream that the west has lost that but when we see it elsewhere, we come up with excuses to hate on it.

As for the men, yes they come across as dirty douchebags when they're poor or lower middle class; and a lot are. However, guess what, here comes tradition again. My family was somewhat poor. My father worked his ass off after leaving his hometown only to send money back to his siblings and his parents so they could be well off. He felt an obligation to his family. Once we were born, he cut out as much as he could but he still helped, taking away from us in the process at some level. He moved his entire family including me and my sister over at the age of 40 to the USA just to give us a better life. The man is not socially there and he is not exactly the alpha red pill white guy. However, I have more respect for him than I could ever express to him because he gave up a lot to work hard and provide for his family so they wouldn't have to suffer. That's with almost no marketable skills. This describes many men in India. Sure, I wouldn't hang out with them because I'm fairly westernized but that doesn't mean I don't respect them. I'm actually glad I can be in their company and feel a sense of self that I otherwise don't have amongst their American counterparts.

The irony of you laying it thick on India and Indians is:
-You ARE Indian
-You were welcomed into India, selling services to Indians (I presume) and shitting on them and the entire country

This is akin to some of the FOB Indian dudes that come to America, hang out with their own and shit on the American culture constantly even though Americans have welcomed them with open arms and provide them many resources if they want to use them. These are the race trolls that I absolutely despise and I also attack them for killing the reputation of other Indian men. I'm equal opportunity in that sense.

You have a decent reputation on the forum and I respect that. It's not easy to transcend social boundaries set by an arcane culture. That said, I respect India's traditions and own up to them even if there is a huge fight against both them and the Indians that don't know any better. I used to be just like you and I hated everything about India. On top of that, I tried very hard to be American, even joining the US Navy in the process. I have been very successful in my career and life and am the top sales person in our practice (an American consulting firm). Technically I'm as American as they come. However, I'm who I am because of my culture, my upbringing and my work ethic which are all Indian.

I may get flak for this post but it's tough to see your culture being spit on by one of your own. From that perspective, I hope people can understand that this is something worth defending.
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#17

What would you do if you were in my shoes?

Quote: (04-20-2017 11:34 AM)kaotic Wrote:  

...
People always LOVE taking photos you could make a killing out here, especially in Southern California.
...

Is gay marriage legal in Cali?

Take one for the team, bro. During the visa process they only make you kiss once!

[Image: lol.gif]

The public will judge a man by what he lifts, but those close to him will judge him by what he carries.
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#18

What would you do if you were in my shoes?

Quote: (04-20-2017 07:29 PM)Cobra Wrote:  

snip

Hell of a post, man.
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#19

What would you do if you were in my shoes?

Quote: (04-20-2017 05:17 PM)slowpoke Wrote:  

Quote: (04-20-2017 06:53 AM)testos111 Wrote:  

I also teach online marketing to MBA students.

If you teach online marketing to MBA students, then you must know quite a bit about it?

Why not focus on generating a passive online income and then you can travel wherever you feel like? and not be limited by where you can legally emigrate to

Might be going a bit off-topic, but being in the IM industry, I can tell you quite easily that passive income is one of the biggest myths out there.

You think developing a product or info course will guarantee you passive income? Absolutely not.

Not unless you have 10,000 daily organic page views on your website at least. And the key word is organic. I'm not talking about PPC traffic here. Cold traffic is the hardest to convert.

But of course, there's no smoke without fire. So who actually earns passive income that can support every aspect of their lifestyle?

In the IM field, only one type of people - those who create softwares/tech products that have a recurring sales model. Think Aweber, Leadpages, etc.

But that is not easy as it requires you to first of all come up with an idea that will stand out in such an overstaruated market, then successfully develop it, test it, promote it and provide after-sales services. Passive, yes. Can anyone do it? No.

Typically, people who really really succeed in IM are those who have a technical background (software engineers) with the ability and aptitude for IM.

People without a techincal background have to rely on info products, like the self-help gurus, the musicians making courses, photographers like me creating e-books, etc.

Problem with info products are that because of the crazy competition, even if you do succeed, they only provide enough money to take care of some of your expenses. And I'm speaking from first hand experience since I have already released two info products on photography with the second one being an e-book that crossed its 1000th sale a few days back.

Very very few people make a killing with info products. All the success stories you hear like those of Pat Flynn, Steve Pavlina, etc are there because these guys were pioneers. You start their model now and you have practically zero chance of succeeding. Despite knowing this, these guys still sell their snake oil products to gullible young men. If you've ever heard of the popular blogger Mark Manson, I once had a argument with him on his Facebook page because he was cloaking Amazon affiliate links in his articles and when I pointed it out, he went crazy on me and banned me as well as deleted that whole fucking post.

Another example is John Loomer. 100% legit guy. But what happened to his Facebook courses? They failed. And what's he doing now? Turning from a Facebook info product guru to a self-help guru lol. Same case with Andrea Vahl who practically disappeared from the scene.

I've scrutinized most of these people to the nth degree and I can tell you straight away that a majority of them are complete frauds.

There are some good ones out there too like CreativeLive and Drumeo but you look at their products and models, and you'll come to know why they are successful in generating a "passive income". It's because they don't have any false hopes of thinking that IM is a place where you can do everything solo and then create some product and then retire on a beach. These are full fledged and funded organizations that are no different than any other big company out there.

Just thought I'd make this clear since there are so many younger guys out here who get sold to these snakeoils. I know it cause I was one to begin with when I started out in IM.
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#20

What would you do if you were in my shoes?

Quote: (04-20-2017 07:29 PM)Cobra Wrote:  

OP, first of all I understand your frustration and commend your ability to transcend stereotypes but your disdain for your fellow Indians is quite disheartening.

India is my homeland and in my opinion, your gratuitous and generalized attempt to attack it are overly unjustified. I'm proud of who I am and transcend stereotypes of my race but do my best to respect my culture and respect differences. Now, Indians, especially men, have a bad reputation due to some fairly bad apples that make us look bad. Trust me that wound is very fresh and the rest of us don't need anyone to rub salt into it. You come in and do that in a grandstanding way. I mean, on a predominantly western forum, you will not receive much criticism for it.

Luckily, this forum is open enough that it allows for alternate perspectives. So I will say my piece in response to your very question of "What would you do in my shoes." First of all, I would stop shitting on the entire culture, your own culture. You are likely hanging out with the wrong people first of all. There are plenty of middle to upper class men and women in New Delhi or Mumbai that I could have a great time with. I know many of them and also keep in touch with them. They have more class than some Americans I know albeit their number is small. When I was in Delhi, I hung around with them and their families and they were nothing but hospitable, open, stylish and fun in my opinion.

You generally walk into an Indian home, you get treated like a god. That hospitality is unsurpassed to me. On top of that the art and culture, if you really decide to enjoy it, is some of the best out there, especially the classical music. I speak 2 Indian languages and still try to learn as much as possible about the culture because I'm genuinely interested. So this is not coming from a bad place.

Speaking of arranged marriages, that system was developed to keep classes within each other and to pass on your legacy. Yes, it's very traditional and makes no damn sense, but let's look at the other side. You have western forum members complaining how the western culture has gotten degenerative and women are not traditional anymore. Well, you have India where they are. Sure they are not stunners or even average but their existence and its purpose is not the same as it is for the west. Women over there toil and toil very hard to take care of not only their husbands and kids but also often times grandparents and others in the family. I mean most traditional Indian women can cook a hell of a meal. I don't care if they're ugly because I'm not trying to bang them. They just deserve my respect for following traditions and doing their best to keep their families happy. We kick and scream that the west has lost that but when we see it elsewhere, we come up with excuses to hate on it.

As for the men, yes they come across as dirty douchebags when they're poor or lower middle class; and a lot are. However, guess what, here comes tradition again. My family was somewhat poor. My father worked his ass off after leaving his hometown only to send money back to his siblings and his parents so they could be well off. He felt an obligation to his family. Once we were born, he cut out as much as he could but he still helped, taking away from us in the process at some level. He moved his entire family including me and my sister over at the age of 40 to the USA just to give us a better life. The man is not socially there and he is not exactly the alpha red pill white guy. However, I have more respect for him than I could ever express to him because he gave up a lot to work hard and provide for his family so they wouldn't have to suffer. That's with almost no marketable skills. This describes many men in India. Sure, I wouldn't hang out with them because I'm fairly westernized but that doesn't mean I don't respect them. I'm actually glad I can be in their company and feel a sense of self that I otherwise don't have amongst their American counterparts.

The irony of you laying it thick on India and Indians is:
-You ARE Indian
-You were welcomed into India, selling services to Indians (I presume) and shitting on them and the entire country

This is akin to some of the FOB Indian dudes that come to America, hang out with their own and shit on the American culture constantly even though Americans have welcomed them with open arms and provide them many resources if they want to use them. These are the race trolls that I absolutely despise and I also attack them for killing the reputation of other Indian men. I'm equal opportunity in that sense.

You have a decent reputation on the forum and I respect that. It's not easy to transcend social boundaries set by an arcane culture. That said, I respect India's traditions and own up to them even if there is a huge fight against both them and the Indians that don't know any better. I used to be just like you and I hated everything about India. On top of that, I tried very hard to be American, even joining the US Navy in the process. I have been very successful in my career and life and am the top sales person in our practice (an American consulting firm). Technically I'm as American as they come. However, I'm who I am because of my culture, my upbringing and my work ethic which are all Indian.

I may get flak for this post but it's tough to see your culture being spit on by one of your own. From that perspective, I hope people can understand that this is something worth defending.

So you are an Indian who's settled abroad and feel happy about Indians because when you come to them, they stroke your ego. On top of that, you respect Indian women because they toil hard for their husbands and family.

And you're blaming me for the culture flak? Lol

If you love India so much, why don't you leave the US and come back? Very easy to preach the patriotic rhetoric sitting all comfy there.

My consciousness is high enough to not believe in stupid things like culture and patriotism. I believe in being utterly selfish and in saying things as I see it. And India is definitely something that deserves flak since it offers very little. Just ask your dad.
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#21

What would you do if you were in my shoes?

Rather than getting into arguments with Mark Manson about how he runs his business, you could always just focus on your business.
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#22

What would you do if you were in my shoes?

Quote: (04-21-2017 01:45 AM)stefpdt Wrote:  

Rather than getting into arguments with Mark Manson about how he runs his business, you could always just focus on your business.

Well since I teach IM, getting into arguments with someone practicing a fraudulent IM technique and learning from the whole experience just adds to my own knowledge and thus I was focusing on my business. Thank you.
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#23

What would you do if you were in my shoes?

Quote: (04-20-2017 07:29 PM)Cobra Wrote:  

OP, first of all I understand your frustration and commend your ability to transcend stereotypes but your disdain for your fellow Indians is quite disheartening.

India is my homeland and in my opinion, your gratuitous and generalized attempt to attack it are overly unjustified. I'm proud of who I am and transcend stereotypes of my race but do my best to respect my culture and respect differences. Now, Indians, especially men, have a bad reputation due to some fairly bad apples that make us look bad. Trust me that wound is very fresh and the rest of us don't need anyone to rub salt into it. You come in and do that in a grandstanding way. I mean, on a predominantly western forum, you will not receive much criticism for it.

Luckily, this forum is open enough that it allows for alternate perspectives. So I will say my piece in response to your very question of "What would you do in my shoes." First of all, I would stop shitting on the entire culture, your own culture. You are likely hanging out with the wrong people first of all. There are plenty of middle to upper class men and women in New Delhi or Mumbai that I could have a great time with. I know many of them and also keep in touch with them. They have more class than some Americans I know albeit their number is small. When I was in Delhi, I hung around with them and their families and they were nothing but hospitable, open, stylish and fun in my opinion.

You generally walk into an Indian home, you get treated like a god. That hospitality is unsurpassed to me. On top of that the art and culture, if you really decide to enjoy it, is some of the best out there, especially the classical music. I speak 2 Indian languages and still try to learn as much as possible about the culture because I'm genuinely interested. So this is not coming from a bad place.

Speaking of arranged marriages, that system was developed to keep classes within each other and to pass on your legacy. Yes, it's very traditional and makes no damn sense, but let's look at the other side. You have western forum members complaining how the western culture has gotten degenerative and women are not traditional anymore. Well, you have India where they are. Sure they are not stunners or even average but their existence and its purpose is not the same as it is for the west. Women over there toil and toil very hard to take care of not only their husbands and kids but also often times grandparents and others in the family. I mean most traditional Indian women can cook a hell of a meal. I don't care if they're ugly because I'm not trying to bang them. They just deserve my respect for following traditions and doing their best to keep their families happy. We kick and scream that the west has lost that but when we see it elsewhere, we come up with excuses to hate on it.

As for the men, yes they come across as dirty douchebags when they're poor or lower middle class; and a lot are. However, guess what, here comes tradition again. My family was somewhat poor. My father worked his ass off after leaving his hometown only to send money back to his siblings and his parents so they could be well off. He felt an obligation to his family. Once we were born, he cut out as much as he could but he still helped, taking away from us in the process at some level. He moved his entire family including me and my sister over at the age of 40 to the USA just to give us a better life. The man is not socially there and he is not exactly the alpha red pill white guy. However, I have more respect for him than I could ever express to him because he gave up a lot to work hard and provide for his family so they wouldn't have to suffer. That's with almost no marketable skills. This describes many men in India. Sure, I wouldn't hang out with them because I'm fairly westernized but that doesn't mean I don't respect them. I'm actually glad I can be in their company and feel a sense of self that I otherwise don't have amongst their American counterparts.

The irony of you laying it thick on India and Indians is:
-You ARE Indian
-You were welcomed into India, selling services to Indians (I presume) and shitting on them and the entire country

This is akin to some of the FOB Indian dudes that come to America, hang out with their own and shit on the American culture constantly even though Americans have welcomed them with open arms and provide them many resources if they want to use them. These are the race trolls that I absolutely despise and I also attack them for killing the reputation of other Indian men. I'm equal opportunity in that sense.

You have a decent reputation on the forum and I respect that. It's not easy to transcend social boundaries set by an arcane culture. That said, I respect India's traditions and own up to them even if there is a huge fight against both them and the Indians that don't know any better. I used to be just like you and I hated everything about India. On top of that, I tried very hard to be American, even joining the US Navy in the process. I have been very successful in my career and life and am the top sales person in our practice (an American consulting firm). Technically I'm as American as they come. However, I'm who I am because of my culture, my upbringing and my work ethic which are all Indian.

I may get flak for this post but it's tough to see your culture being spit on by one of your own. From that perspective, I hope people can understand that this is something worth defending.

I expected an extremely amateur response to my previous post above; and I was not disappointed. Some may also think I should give it a rest at this point, which I will. However, in the mean time, I just can't help it.

Quote: (04-21-2017 01:28 AM)testos111 Wrote:  

So you are an Indian who's settled abroad and feel happy about Indians because when you come to them, they stroke your ego. On top of that, you respect Indian women because they toil hard for their husbands and family.

And you're blaming me for the culture flak? Lol
Dude, people in the west yearn for culture. You are in a place that has it. Embrace it. Yes, I settled abroad but moved here when I was young (not by choice) and embraced the American culture. For that reason I'm grateful but I'm a guest in this country and while I have even gone as far as serving its military, I don't feel I belong 100%. That's not anyone's fault; just another fact I also embrace. Anyone who makes me happy strokes my ego, Indian or not and similarly, any woman that takes care of her family also deserves my respect, Indian or not. I'm self aware enough to know that my ego being stroked feels good as it would for any male human being. You should receive the Captain Obvious award for your psychoanalytic abilities.

I realized something about you. It's not that you don't get along with other Indians. Indians don't get along with you. I'm surprised you don't fit into the upper echelon of Indians I mentioned who you should theoretically get along with. I know these people and they are the best of both worlds. They're genuinely sincere people and I don't believe you have access to them because of your sheer douchiness.

Quote: (04-21-2017 01:28 AM)testos111 Wrote:  

If you love India so much, why don't you leave the US and come back? Very easy to preach the patriotic rhetoric sitting all comfy there.
I would and likely one day I will be spending a significant amount of time there for business and personal purposes. The USA has done more for me since I grew up here. So I have my loyalty towards it more than I do India. That's not the same thing as forgetting India. My roots are in India, so I learn as much about it as I can, keep up with my language skill and also pass down its culture to my kids. When I can go there, I do. I mean, after reading your posts, I think India could use a bit more love.

Quote: (04-21-2017 01:28 AM)testos111 Wrote:  

My consciousness is high enough to not believe in stupid things like culture and patriotism. I believe in being utterly selfish and in saying things as I see it. And India is definitely something that deserves flak since it offers very little. Just ask your dad.

Single celled organisms, jackasses and western females also don't believe in "stupid" things like culture and patriotism. Give me a break. This forum is a conservative space that values culture and patriotism if you couldn't tell. I'm also lost as to how you think your high consciousness would decrease the relevance of culture. What's the correlation? [Image: lol.gif]

I don't relate to you because I believe in selflessness to my loved ones and those I consider worthy of my company. I'm genuine to them as they come first. This is also something I carry from Indian culture but you wouldn't know it even though it's staring you in your face everyday. That's why my dad moved because the opportunities for him were much better, not because they sucked in India. You may have to be reincarnated a few times before you realize that type of selflessness and sacrifice. If you came back as a dog, at least you would have loyalty. Maybe after that, you can try for a higher life form.

Every country deserves flak and so does India but you generalize India as some kind of backwards land while you praise the west. That's an amateur approach because you know more about one than the other, quite simply.

I've known Indians like you that come here thinking that being more "fair skinned" and tall will help you become more American. I mean, let's break down the logic; you live in India, hate Indians and yearn for western liberalism. We in America call that a "wannabe" or "tryhard." I stay away from these people and so do my American counterparts because it's obvious who they are. Anyone that shits on their own culture and pledges loyalty to another one is a traitor to me. You will try extremely hard to be American and it won't work because that's not who you are. I know because I used to be that way. Take that as free advice. The grass in never greener on the other side.

While your photography posts are great and helpful to those that want to get in to it, your "I'm better than the rest of my own race" attitude is a shitty one that's quite opposite of the red pill philosophy we embody on the forum. I almost think you're using the forum as a marketing tool and will step away once you've extracted its resources, but I could be wrong.

Remember there is a difference between "Douchebag" and "Red pill/Alpha male." A lot of members don't even realize it. You just became the next one in line. Congrats!
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#24

What would you do if you were in my shoes?

Big league post from Kobra! [Image: icon_lol.gif]


Seriously testo, I'd avoid complaining about India when it sounds like you have a good life in your own country. If you're truly location independent, save up some cash, get your passport in order and travel a bit.

I felt the same way about my city of origin and I'm now a lot happier that I left. That said, I still do look back at all the opportunities presented to me by my family, friends, city and state and feel lucky. You should temper your dislike for your country with a bit of gratitude as well.

There are probably millions of Indian dudes who would line up for the opportunities you have, so it definitely does come across the wrong way when you hate on your own like that.

Not to mention, when you hate on India like that you embolden people who know NOTHING about India and make them feel like it's OK to shit on your country and culture. That ain't cool.

Bottomline: we don't like to read whining on this forum, we like to read plans of action or accomplishments. Whining about indians and India will win you no friends here.

I will be checking my PMs weekly, so you can catch me there. I will not be posting.
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#25

What would you do if you were in my shoes?

Hey Testos111, I am not Indian, but here is a thought. Try the Philippines, maybe for a month or two to see if you like it. A few years ago I read a post by an Indian guy on a random travel forum. Can't find it now, but I remember that he made an interesting point. like you, he also had a location independent business. Instead of moving to the West like many of his friends did, he moved to the Philippines. While his friends worked hard to make $80-100K in the US (a solid middle class salary, but not nearly enough to live like a baller), he enjoyed his life in the Phils, banged multiple girls and sent their pics to his friends who were jealous, because they couldn't laid at all.

Now, I have no idea what it's like for an Indian guy in the Phils or South East Asia in general, but what I know is that the people in the Philippines are generally friendly and humble. The girls like foreigners and not only those who come from Western countries. Indonesia is another country you can check out, though it's a little more difficult to navigate due to the language barrier outside of touristy places. Also, many Indians travel to Thailand, but the Thais tend to be more xenophobic generally speaking. Still, Thailand may be worth checking out as well.

Anyway, best of luck to you. It seems like you've got the money making part figured out which is the most important thing. There are many great places out there in the world including those outside of North America and Europe.
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