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Man fakes his way through footballer career
#1

Man fakes his way through footballer career

This came to light in the 90s, so some of you probably know of it from before, but I just discovered it today and it reminds me of people I know that are sort of "faking it" through some aspect of their lives (careers, relationships, etc.).

http://www.atlasobscura.com/articles/soc...y-the-game

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Kaiser had devised a plan to keep his career going. By riding the coattails of more promising colleagues, faking injuries at pertinent times, and taking advantage of the lack of technology, Carlos Kaiser was able to maintain a professional athlete’s lifestyle without ever having to prove his athleticism.

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Another trick Kaiser employed involved the use of a toy cell phone. In the early 1980s, cell phones were a status symbol reserved for the elite, and Kaiser would often carry his fake one with him, pretending to answer calls from interested English clubs in order to make himself appear more valuable to his teammates and coaches.

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The team organized an open invitation team practice session where fans could watch the team train and get a glimpse at their new Brazilian star. Kaiser, wary of having to showcase his skills in front of the anxious crowd, decided to kick all of the team’s balls into the stands, thanking the fans and kissing the team’s badge on his jersey. “The fans went crazy,” Carlos states, “and in the grass there was not a ball.”

On one level, this is scummy, but on another, it's brilliant.
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#2

Man fakes his way through footballer career

I neither applaud his skulduggery nor condone it.

Still, I can't deny that he's a rare combination of brains and balls.

G
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#3

Man fakes his way through footballer career

With our "sports hero" culture i am surprised this hasnt happened more often. The "mob" needs to be satisfied.
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#4

Man fakes his way through footballer career

Quote: (08-22-2016 07:56 PM)ivansirko Wrote:  

With our "sports hero" culture i am surprised this hasnt happened more often. The "mob" needs to be satisfied.

I think it would be hard to do something like this today, given the rise of analytics in every sport to determine just how good a player is or is not to an extreme level of detail.
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#5

Man fakes his way through footballer career

Well, Tim Tebow basically did the same. He can't pass some football and he was just minutes away to go the Super Bowl. LOL!!!

With God's help, I'll conquer this terrible affliction.

By way of deception, thou shalt game women.

Diaboli virtus in lumbar est -The Devil's virtue is in his loins.
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#6

Man fakes his way through footballer career

It's insane to me that this was possible. That is some supreme social engineering, but it seems so absurd that this guy was able to get contracts (for 2 decades even) and favorable opinion without ever even playing or exemplifying any skill whatsoever.
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#7

Man fakes his way through footballer career

What happened to little Timmy?

Cattle 5000 Rustlings #RustleHouseRecords #5000Posts
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Game is the difference between a broke average looking dude in a 2nd tier city turning bad bitch feminists into maids and fucktoys and a well to do lawyer with 50x the dough taking 3 dates to bang broads in philly.
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#8

Man fakes his way through footballer career

Quote: (08-22-2016 10:05 PM)Cattle Rustler Wrote:  

What happened to little Timmy?

Little Tim will try now some MLB baseball. Yes, it's gonna be funny!

With God's help, I'll conquer this terrible affliction.

By way of deception, thou shalt game women.

Diaboli virtus in lumbar est -The Devil's virtue is in his loins.
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#9

Man fakes his way through footballer career

There was a Nigerian player that claimed to be the cousin of a famous soccer player and tricked an English club to sign him. There's more than one way to leave you're mark in history
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#10

Man fakes his way through footballer career

With bullshitting-into-sinecure skills like that, he could move to San Francisco and become a tech evangelist.
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#11

Man fakes his way through footballer career

I thought the thread was about Jack Wilshire.

Don't debate me.
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#12

Man fakes his way through footballer career

Speaking of football cons, not too long a ago a man conned his way into owning Notts County FC until it fell apart. It was quite incredible what he was able to do.

- He claimed he was a representative of the King of Bahrain
- Set up a Swiss holding company and claimed $2 trillion in assets, claimed to hold rights to all gold, iron ore and coal in North Korea.
- Convinced First Bank of London to turn over 49% of its shares to him





Americans are dreamers too
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#13

Man fakes his way through footballer career

Quote: (08-22-2016 09:10 PM)General Stalin Wrote:  

It's insane to me that this was possible. That is some supreme social engineering, but it seems so absurd that this guy was able to get contracts (for 2 decades even) and favorable opinion without ever even playing or exemplifying any skill whatsoever.


meh. Kobe Bryant did it four years with the Lakers. He stole 100MM in salary, wrecked the teams chances for any type of playoff run for 7 - 8 years, was a total dick to his teammates, and still got a world class sendoff thanks to one of the most corrupt professional sports leagues ever. So it is not like it still does not happen.
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#14

Man fakes his way through footballer career

Quote: (08-22-2016 11:47 PM)Truckn Wrote:  

Quote: (08-22-2016 09:10 PM)General Stalin Wrote:  

It's insane to me that this was possible. That is some supreme social engineering, but it seems so absurd that this guy was able to get contracts (for 2 decades even) and favorable opinion without ever even playing or exemplifying any skill whatsoever.


meh. Kobe Bryant did it four years with the Lakers. He stole 100MM in salary, wrecked the teams chances for any type of playoff run for 7 - 8 years, was a total dick to his teammates, and still got a world class sendoff thanks to one of the most corrupt professional sports leagues ever. So it is not like it still does not happen.

Kobe Bryant was different. He actually was good for a number of years, won some championships, and basically just rode on the good will he built up throughout his career during his sunset years.

Carlos Kaiser on the other hand literally did nothing on-field for any of his teams at any point in time.

EDIT: I agree with you that Bryant did fuck up the Lakers though.
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#15

Man fakes his way through footballer career

RushJones, who was the Nigerian? John Fash? Seems Nigerians and Jamaicans are cut from the same game clothe!
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#16

Man fakes his way through footballer career

George Weah's "cousin"
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#17

Man fakes his way through footballer career

Yeah I remember that!

It was Chelsea.

He was on for 5 minutes before the gig was up..

There's footage somewhere of the bench twitching like meerkats whilst they watch the teams shape unraveling ..
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#18

Man fakes his way through footballer career

Nope it was for Southampton, Ali Dia was his name. He actually almost scored a goal though so I wonder how far he could have gone if he did.




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#19

Man fakes his way through footballer career

Yeah, this is impossible today. Coaches actually use advanced analytical software that can track individual performance in ways a human never could, even measuring factors such as weather, what the athlete ate that day, etc.

What I don't get is... this guy went through so much effort to trick everyone of his playing ability, couldn't he just have actually learned to play the game in that 20 year span? He had training, coaches, and funds. Couldn't he at least become an average or mediocre player?
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#20

Man fakes his way through footballer career

Easy to do, since "soccer" isn't a real sport.

I'm the King of Beijing!
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#21

Man fakes his way through footballer career

^How is 'soccer' not a real sport?

Don't debate me.
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#22

Man fakes his way through footballer career

^
[Image: 34qjnrd.gif?w=320&h=240]

[Image: jXG71.gif]

[Image: 27-Funny-football-soccer-meme-biggest-fake-injury.gif]

[Image: ahhh-my-face.gif?w=320&h=180]

[Image: 14460239242_caf401415a_o.gif]

[Image: lofr1.gif#gif%20soccer%20player%20fakes%...%20317x222]

[Image: 191866.gif]

I'm the King of Beijing!
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#23

Man fakes his way through footballer career

I believe it, Brazilians had mythologcial status until well into the 00s in football clubs. Everyone sort of believed that all brazilians were these football gods. No internet, no video, no detailed scouting, how would you know. A similar scam happens today where talented Africans are lied 5 years younger, so you have a full grown adult maybe 23 being called 17, thus looking as an amazing talent.

It also happened a lot in European basketball in the 90s, where after the Dream Team, Americans where also seen as basketball gods and every player who ever sniffed the NBA could bounce around injured or with a drinking/drug habit from one small time club to the next, mostly being signed as a marketing stunt. I believe even Magic Johnson did so.
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#24

Man fakes his way through footballer career

This is interesting. It makes me think about the adage "fake it till you make it"

It seems in the era of social media, this is all the more possible, if you want to represent yourself a certain way, you can easily do just that if you know what you're doing. Obviously this level of deception of faking an entire career wouldn't be possible, but don't you find it strange how on social media "everybody is a rock star / model / rich and famous"?

"Does PUA say that I just need to get to f-close base first here and some weird chemicals will be released in her brain to make her a better person?"
-Wonitis
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#25

Man fakes his way through footballer career

Quote: (08-23-2016 06:38 AM)Suits Wrote:  

Easy to do, since "soccer" isn't a real sport.

As always, the women never got the memo:





“The greatest burden a child must bear is the unlived life of its parents.”

Carl Jung
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