[Cavorite]

I tend to stall out on a date after an hour or so. I need a routine to transition into a more personal, sexual conversation.

I've heard about games "what was the most afraid you've ever been, etc." but I don't know what questions are good for this. Any advice on this or anything similar you use?

I know about palm reading, but I can't pull that off convincingly.

Apologies if this has been covered. I can't find anything relevant in the archives.

[Hypno]

I would focus on physical escalation first. Start with eye contact. Ask her an open ended question and actively listen. Give her lots of head nods and uh huh so she elaborates. Look into her eyes then her lips back to her eyes.

You can bump her hand or move some hair away from her face.
Place your hand on her arm, then her thigh.

Do this gradually over a course of an hour. .I find it easier to do this sitting in the same side of a booth



When you leave, put your hand on her back instead of holding her hand. Slide it up under her hair to her neck and then run your fingers through her hair.

[Cavorite]

Thanks. I'm pretty good with kino escalation. My problem is transitioning from basic talk to building a deeper rapport. There have to be routines for this somewhere.

[EarnStackEnjoy]

Also interested in the topic above.

[ChefAllDay]

After an hour in the same location? I would say bounce. Have your logistics down so there are another couple options of locations within a couple minutes walking or by Uber. Use the transition time to use those Kino skills by being a gentleman for the moment (help with coat, taking her hand getting into or out of the Uber or stepping off a curb). When you get to the new location, you can reboot the conversation by using the old location, stay positive though. Something like "I really liked that place, it reminds me of .....blah blah....some deeper shit."

(01-20-2019 04:15 PM)Hypno Wrote:  

Do this gradually over a course of an hour. .I find it easier to do this sitting in the same side of a booth
When you leave, put your hand on her back instead of holding her hand. Slide it up under her hair to her neck and then run your fingers through her hair.

Sitting across from each other at the very start is fine as you have to get through the first bit of interview style conversation. Sitting side by side is key, especially at a second place if you feel like the first hour went well (aka you're interested). If not you can just end it, but if the potential is high you can pretty much escalate into an insta second date right there and hit up a new spot where you can sit next to each other.

Doing that you can share secrets, make up stories about people around you or whatever, and escalate Kino further. It takes the pressure off of being face to face all the time. If there is a shot silence you can both look around the room naturally, not look down at the table or blankly over each others shoulder. Then when you see something funny or worth talking about you can use the opportunity to make her turn and consciously look at you, share a funny or interesting moment and build rapport.

[RDF]

(01-20-2019 04:21 PM)Cavorite Wrote:  

Thanks. I'm pretty good with kino escalation. My problem is transitioning from basic talk to building a deeper rapport. There have to be routines for this somewhere.

90% of human communication is non-verbal. So if you're actually having success with physical escalation (getting laid on dates), there's probably no need to switch things up with your conversation game.

However, from my experience, it's hard to do proper physical escalation without also moving to a deeper conversation. Pretty tough to start making out with a girl when you're talking about your job or your favorite movies. The two tend to go hand in hand with getting her in bed.

While there are a bunch of routines and games out there that attempt to do this (strawberry fields, 21 questions, etc), I'm not a fan of these. They're repetitive/boring and pretty awkward to bust out in the middle of date. I firmly believe that to get in deep with a girl, you have to show at least a little personality and even vulnerability. Here is my typical "routine" during a date.

1) Set up date at a quieter bar/lounge. I will always sit next to her, whether in a booth or at the bar. If you have to sit across, bounce to a "next to" spot (ie: at the bar) once seats become available. Sitting across kills the vibe and makes it much harder to make a move. If she finds that weird, she's not going to be fucking you, so might as well bounce right then and there and not waste your time.

2) Early in the convo you can talk about anything, whether its favorite nightlife spots, movies, doesn't matter. Over time, start to ask things that are slightly more personal, and always frame it very open ended. An easy one is "tell me about your favorite travel story". The goal is to probe for something that she is really interested in and wants to talk about.

3) Once you find the right topic and she starts talking consistently, listen and ask casual/half-serious questions. If she starts babbling about traveling all of Europe (like every basic white chick), I'll joke "which country was the best on Tinder" or shit like that. She might answer seriously, but most likely she'll punch your arm and laugh and then keep going.

4) At this point, especially if she asks, have a story of yours ready as well. I have stories that I tend to share on dates which present the image of a fun/adventurous guy. I've always had good story-telling ability where I can make a trip to the grocery store sounds like a Lord of the Rings plotline, so this helps. Make it sound as if it is a really personal story, and you're letting her in on it. Not everybody will agree with this, but I rarely get laid on first dates playing the ultra-alpha card where I show zero vulnerability.

5) This entire time, you've hopefully been escalating physically, and have put your arm around her, etc. Keep the convo rolling as long as you want. I rarely spend more than 1.5 hours in one venue with a girl, at that point you should know whether its happening or not.

[Mufasa]

My methodology is being the guy that "gets it(understands a woman sexual needs" without verbally broadcasting it in a sexually aggressive way. Sometimes you have to let the cave man when the situation calls for it but you have to try keep her plausible deniability somewhat together.

Dancing (grinding or not)
Touching her erogenous zones
eye contact with sexual soul owning gaze
Making fun of her with said eye contact while having your arm around her in some manner.

Sometimes I've used some reverse engineering of her body language.
for example: certion IOI's you can actually put her into and those seem to trigger an IOI even if you physically made her do it. Wrapping her arms around you, around your neck, putting her hand on your ass, wrapping her arms around you and under your jacket if its cold out, putting her hand on your knee (slyly of course.

Some moves are more sexually aggressive than others so read the situation and act accordingly.

[Sidney Crosby]

When seated I usually just put my hand on their leg close to their knees to start then gradually move the hand up so it's near the chicks pussy, if we head outside I'll take her by the hand or put my arm around on her then not too long after grab her ass, then pull her in and make out with her.

Or put your arm around her while walking or seated and "accidentally" grab her tits. Although don't open with this, it has to be clear that she likes you a bit. In todays culture in western countries be cautious.

[S3K2]

Find something you both have in common and talk about it. Stay on the subject long enough and you will find something else you have in common. Than, boom, you are now building deep rapport. Another way to connect to her is show vulnerability. Example is, "I like oldies for music. All this new hop hop shit is trash. Oldies remind me of my moms that passed a few years back because.....you are building rspport by doing this because everyone lost someone they love.
Rainbow statements are strong rapport builders as well. Google rainbow statements. I used to suck at building rapport but after a million dates I can build rapport very very quickly, along with kino escalation which you said you have in a bag and you should be killing it out there. Only thing I find is with deep rapport comes deep commitment with this chicks because they feel "your the one".

[The Grey]

Why do you guys always need to make it so difficult. Just grab her by the arms, throw her over your shoulder and run back to your place. Done deal, you are welcome

[Black Caesar]

Look up Jugglar's method

Basics is you ask open question, relate to the feeling or emotion expressed in her response, then add in your own spin to whatever the next emotion you want to elicit is. You can also start with bait so she asks you something and move from there.

Once you got thay down then you want to look up Second Generation Verbals on NextASF which is more about verbally expressing non judgement and secret society ideals so she feels safe and good getting with you.

Jugglar:

Her: "oh I went out with my best friend yesterday"
You: "Haha I bet you two had too much fun" (reward)

"I love going out with my best friend he and I just vibe so well and amp each other up and weve gotten into some really crazy shit together" (relate)

"Like dont you have that one friend that always has your back and is like your partner in crime basically..." (new question and spin towards deeper topic)


Second gen verbals -

Her: "oh I went out with my best friend yesterday"

You: "Ha I bet you two are crazy together. Thats how me and my best friend are, like I would take a bullet for that guy and he always has my back. One time I was messing with my ex somewhere we shouldnt have been and he stood lookout for like an hour" (sub communicate social guy and preselection with the ex)

Her: omg what happened

You: "nah youre totally gonna judge me if I tell you"

Her: no no I wont

You: "ok cause I dont judge but sometimes people are crazy like that" (hit on non judgement)

"So basically we were just doing stuff in public at the beach and he stood down the way with his girl and then when some people were coming he yelled down at us to finish up and we hella scrambled lol"

Her: oh thats not even that bad

You: nah I cant even tell you most of them you would for sure judge me plus I shared now you gotta share..."

Her: story time plus qualifying to your non judgement frame again


Obviously use your own stories and experiences but thats the general idea. Once you mix these two concepts its basically a wrap.

By the way you can practice both of these with cold approach not just on dates. Its even better cause you have to work more on the fly.

[DarkVader]

My first dates go well and they are generally vibe based. By that I mean I'm not worrying about content more about a confident delivery and general teasing. If you tease, lead and touch you can't go too far wrong.

[Preshita]

I haven’t read all the answers on here, and I certainly haven’t got all the answers myself, but escalating things on a date is my thang, so I’ll add my two cents:

The biggest advantage when on a date is all the information you get and all the information you get to share.

This exchange of dhv’ing - which is basically what it is, should be enough to work out along the way what triggers her emotions and when you can twist and turn topics to benefit your agenda.

Eye contact is absolutely vital. That and humour. I can’t stress this enough. If you do well in these departments it becomes sooo damn easy to get her comfortable enough to invest. The IOIs that arises from this comfort building formula are clear as day when you detect them. It provides you with the confidence to chunk your energy over into just enjoying the power of freedom to be you. Like you’re hanging out with your mates - just being you really.