[Zibi Zibi]

Hey

I am going out on dates regularly (apps, not dg/ng). Even though in my opinion all goes smoothly, we both have fun usually the girls that I like (good looking ones) usually never message me 1st after date so I always have to initiate contact, whereas with girls whom I don't like that much (they look worse compared to 1 group) they always text me no matter what.


What's the reason behind this?

Tbh I think I have even more fun with the cute girls compared to the medicore looking ones, cuz with 2nd group I don't care I just put 0 energy.


I don't even do any kino with 2nd group compared to the 1st one.


any advice is highly appreciated.

[BadBoyGamer]

Quote:

cuz with 2nd group I don't care I just put 0 energy.

Not giving a fuck is a powerful thing.

[Zibi Zibi]

but these dates are not as cool and enjoyable for me as with 2nd group. any advice what can I improve on? or whats wrong?

[The Golden God]

You might be unconsciously slipping up with the better looking girls because you're nervous, while with the ugly girls are no problem to you.

How long are you waiting to talk to them after a date, and what have you been doing on your average dates?

Are you changing up anything with the hotter girls that you don't do with the mediocre ones?

[Zibi Zibi]

(11-06-2018 10:04 AM)The Golden God Wrote:  

You might be unconsciously slipping up with the better looking girls because you're nervous, while with the ugly girls are no problem to you.

How long are you waiting to talk to them after a date, and what have you been doing on your average dates?

Are you changing up anything with the hotter girls that you don't do with the mediocre ones?

Okay I will elaborate for you:
I have 2 types of dates:

1st type: I invite girl over to my place and it usually ends up in a bang and become continous fb relationship, but for some reason I never invite cute girls over, maybe I need to change it lol

2nd type of dates: coffee or beer + taking a walk afterwards.
I used to invite girls over to cinema or restaurant but that's just waste of money even if we share 50/50 taking into consideration amount of my dates.


On the dates with cute girls we talk a lot, laugh, having a good time. Im not making it sexual tho, we hold eachother hands and maybe some kino like grabbing her or touching hair but no kiss.

With medicore looking girls I dont even do kino e.x. holding hands but they end up chatting me, and continously pming me even if I balantly ignore them.

I had 4 dates recently with good looking girls and kind of successful at the same time, and only 1 out of 4 initiated contact back with me after date, other just keep silent until I open convo again, but I decided to ghost these girls cuz they clearly dont give a fuck if they wont say hi first once in a blue moon.

1 girl I even took out to an escape room, I bet she never had a date like this, then we went out for pizza and then park, all bills shared 50.50 but yet, chick doesn't care to initiate contact once by herself.

[456]

A key point, regardless of the type of girl or date:

- in the last 5 minutes of the date, what vibe are you getting?

That's so crucial because a girl who wants to see you again will (in my experience) look you in the eyes and verbalize that, i.e. "we should really do this again!" or "what's your schedule like early next week?"

A girl who doesn't want to, will act a little distant, cold, or "by the books" polite.

A girl on the fence will be somewhere in the middle.

What are you experience face-to-face in those last few minutes of each date?

[The Golden God]

^ 456 has a good point too. Read off how they are feeling at the end of the date and you can decide what you're going to have to do.

If she's all over you, laughs the whole time and can't stop talking and sharing personal details you're in the clear. You're going to most likely be able to get her back on another date. The social lubrication is flowing and all you need to do is continue the interaction in as smooth of a way as possible and don't fuck it up.

If she keeps looking at her phone, sounds unexcited about things and is constantly giving you shit tests it'll be a lot harder and you probably don't want to chase after her too hard. These are the girls that I will try and go for broke on. Tinder sluts are notorious for this.

Texting a girl first after a date isn't a big deal at all. Don't text them right after telling them you had a good time and that you should hang out again, make that known in person while she's warmed up and still has you right in front of her. Strike while the iron is hot.

Girls love texting because it gives them plenty of time for the hamster to spin, you don't get to see her reactions and she has the power to purposefully be a pain in the ass to make you jump through hoops.

Unless you've already fucked a girl several times, I would keep the texts to logistics only, and a few extra things to keep in mind:

- Work on developing inside jokes and things to tease and base conversation around. The more outside the box the better. This makes things interesting and fun, while setting you apart from the typical guy trying to chat her up and fuck her. When you text her, include callbacks to when you hung out before to keep her thinking about how much she likes to be around you.

- Edit your texts to remove unnecessary fluff. Type out what you want to say, then go and edit through it to remove all of the junk to get straight to the point. Short and concise texts.

- Never reply to her any faster than twice the time it took her to reply to you. She took an hour? You take two. She took two days? You take four.

[Zibi Zibi]

(11-06-2018 10:33 AM)456 Wrote:  

A key point, regardless of the type of girl or date:

- in the last 5 minutes of the date, what vibe are you getting?

That's so crucial because a girl who wants to see you again will (in my experience) look you in the eyes and verbalize that, i.e. "we should really do this again!" or "what's your schedule like early next week?"

A girl who doesn't want to, will act a little distant, cold, or "by the books" polite.

A girl on the fence will be somewhere in the middle.

What are you experience face-to-face in those last few minutes of each date?

We usually end up our meeting with kiss on a cheek and a hug. Maybe I should just escalate to kiss during the date, maybe that would make the difference? Im not really sure, as with the not so good loking chicks it doesnt really matter, as they still msg me even tho of no kino.

None of them tho says that they wanna meet up again during the date, even the medicore girls who keeps texting me afterwards.*

*except of 1 recently whom I didnt want to meet again anyway, and also except of my last date where we considered where we can go for a next date but, she doesn't even initiate contact .x.


btw. if a girl never initiates a contact herslef should I ditch such a girl? it's kind of weird for me

[456]

Why don’t you ask the cute ones during the end of the date?

“This was fun — we should do it again”

And see how they react / respond.

(Watch out for a tepid polite fake yes)

[Zibi Zibi]

(11-06-2018 01:06 PM)456 Wrote:  

Why don’t you ask the cute ones during the end of the date?

“This was fun — we should do it again”

And see how they react / respond.

(Watch out for a tepid polite fake yes)

Sure, I will implement it as well as more escalating.
Any other tips? highly appreciated.

[456]

That's pretty much it!

You speak of the pipeline of dates like you are just zooming through them (you have a lot, a lot to keep track of, etc.).

But sparking that real connection, building suspense, making her forget about other guys, wanting to see you again -- that's the purpose of the date.

Another tip to help build the environment leading up to the "This is fun -- we should do it again", is get her talking about her passions, talk about yours, create the us-vs-the-world bubble, basically standard date stuff. But pretend it's not one of a thousand dates this month.

Basically, there's no "game" at the crux of the date -- she knows 100% if she wants to see you again.

Just like you know if you want to see her again!

==

Obviously the best thing is to escalate -- I've had first dates end in "almost-bangs", like a "just-the-tip-actually-no-this-is-too-fast" -- if you like the girl, just act UNPHASED by it, that really helps.

If it ends in a bang, then obviously problem solved -- the post-bang behavior sends out "possible LTR" vibes or "possible FB" vibes.