[Palo_alto]

Maybe I should post this on family?

Well gents,

Palo Alto here. I am 30 years old now. I have been in the game for quite a while and after getting a bit sick of banging bitches, whores, tinder, clubs, drinking,etc... I decided to make some life changes and look for a partner.

8 months ago I met this girl. She is born and raise in Latin America. She takes care of herself, she is feminine, she takes care about me, she can cook, she likes sports, she rarely uses social media, she was raised with values. She is honest, loyal. I can trust this girl.

She is very smart (She is a medical doctor), well travelled, nerdy, speaks 3 languages, she is very religious (She keeps a bible on her nighstand). She had 2 boyfriends before me. Both of them 4+ year relationship. Even though I would never ask again a girl for her notch count, my feelings tell me is 2. I am her 3rd. She has never done anal or anything to wild in bed. Before me.

She is also a bit boring, very busy with work, does not drink and pretty much likes to chill at home when she is not at the hospital. I have to make all the plans if we are going out,etc...Which is fine by me.

Of course no tattoos, gay friends, selfies and all the other red flags. This time I looked for values, specially loyalty.

The downside is that she lives 100km away from me. Palo alto had a lot of bitches in the past. Lot´s of them still look for Palo Alto. Palo Alto is not available at the moment. At least until last night.

Yesterday was a good day. I signed a new apartment that I bought and I wanted to celebrate. GF is busy at the hospital (24 hour shift). My best mate is with the wifey. I go out ALONE.

I start with a single malt, then a 2nd one. I started messaging some girls on my IG. I have been talking to this girl which I used to fuck maybe 1 year ago. She is town, she wants to meet. She know I have a GF.

She comes, we drank, we came back to my place, we fucked, I came on her big silicon melons. I could not fuck her the way I wanted, because I was feeling guilty while doing so. I still got my nut though.

This morning I woke up. Hangover and feeling like a total piece of shit. I have never cheated on a girl before. I always ended things beforehand. Why did I do this? I wanted to bang a Bimbo, I wanted to get it out of my system. Jerking off thinking about her was not enough. I did it. Now what?

Believe it or not. I asked for advice from my mother. I called her up in tears and told her what happened. I told her that I wanted to tell my GF and end things. I do not want to destroy her heart (She loves me) I do not love her yet. In my eyes what happened is not fair.

She tells me to keep my mouth shut. Swallow your guilt and never do that shit again. Men need to satisfy their instincts, you satisfied yours. There is no need for you tell her. Just tell her you are feeling a bit lonely and that she is working to much, you need her more. That´s it.

Well I did not see that coming. Even though I still feel like a piece of shit. I hope ROOSH V members can have a bit of compassion with this sexual animal and support with your 2 cents in this case.

What should Palo Alto do?

Danke!

[Cr33pin]

Stop being a pussy and forgive yourself for fulfilling your natural desires as a man. If you are that weak that its eating away at your soul for not telling your girlfriend you had casual sex with some girl and it didn't mean anything.... then you need to work on your mental fortitude.

I could go on a long spiel about this topic but I pretty much covered the gist of it. Unless your girlfriend was present an part of a threesome with this other skank then what you and that skank did has nothing to do with you and your girlfriend. The only reason you are connecting the two is cause of warped societal norms that teach you that humans are monogamous when in reality we are not.

If anything this should strengthen your bond with your girlfriend. You got the desire for some strange out of your system and it reinforced all the things you love about your current gf.

Never tell her about this..... nothing good will come from it


(I'm not knocking you, this is just tough love)

[ShuaiGe]

If you tell her you'll hurt her and if you don't tell her she won't feel hurt. Don't be selfish and make her feel bad because You want relief from guilt. A change in your actions is much better than words.

[PapayaTapper]

I rarely say this...Listen to your mother.

My 2 cents

Im not making a moral judgement on your actions. What's right and wrong for you in this situation is between you and your self respect (and God if applicable).

But part of being a man is having the balls to take responsibility for one's own actions.

Under no circumstances tell your girl. Telling her about what happened is a thousand times more selfish, mean spirited and douchebaggery than the action itself.

You made the "mistake". Dont punish her...it doesn't sound like she deserves it.

Dont tell her.

Get a grip and grow a pair.

Youre old enough you should be helping your mother, not asking mommy for advice

[EndsExpect]

(08-04-2018 10:14 AM)Palo_alto Wrote:  

Well I did not see that coming. Even though I still feel like a piece of shit. I hope ROOSH V members can have a bit of compassion with this sexual animal and support with your 2 cents in this case.

I've been on both sides of this situation before, so I have a very good understanding.

The quality of your mother's advice comes down to one big question. Can you forgive yourself and move on? If you cannot essentially forget it happened then this will cause intimacy issues in your relationship. To fix this, you must either be very honest and if you are a quality man she will be hurt and lose trust, but will likely forgive. Alternately you can dump her and begin a new relationship and just never mention the cheating. BOTH of these options will be painful for her.

I'm going to tell you that over half of women cheat easily and often... with zero guilt or remorse. They handle it by blaming the man they are cheating on and refusing responsibility. You can do this too. It's not entirely your fault that your GF left you sexually unsatisfied.

[DonnyGately]

Never ever tell her. That's what therapists are for.

[Polniy_Sostav]

Don't tell her and put yourself in a situation where you won't do it again.

[Ski pro]

I understand you dilemma, many of us have been there.

Assuming no one saw you bang the slut the question is, Did you bang raw? If so, check yourself for std. this is the only way you’ll get found out. (Speaking from personal experience)

If you did bang raw You may have to invent a reason not to fuck your gf for a bit while you wait for the test results.

Assuming you used a Jonny or the test comes back fine, then you’re in the clear, the only question then is can you live with your guilt.

I have done in the past but it eats away at the trust foundation of your relationship. I’ll never forget how devastated one of my ex’s was when she found out I had cheated. It was terrible.

It depends on how into the doctor chick you are, how flexible your morals are. Time is a good healer for this.

I should add that I have not and will never cheat on mrs SP because she’s the only one I’ve never wanted to cheat on.

[Dalaran1991]

Let's turn this question around for everyone who says dont tell her and be a man:

If your girlfriend/wife, who is usually faithful makes an error of judgement and cheated on you with a random guy, would you prefer her telling you or her keeping her mouth shut?

[PapayaTapper]

(08-05-2018 09:30 AM)Dalaran1991 Wrote:  

Let's turn this question around for everyone who says dont tell her and be a man:

If your girlfriend/wife, who is usually faithful makes an error of judgement and cheated on you with a random guy, would you prefer her telling you or her keeping her mouth shut?

^ Depends on how big her tits are

[Cr33pin]

(08-05-2018 09:30 AM)Dalaran1991 Wrote:  

Let's turn this question around for everyone who says dont tell her and be a man:

If your girlfriend/wife, who is usually faithful makes an error of judgement and cheated on you with a random guy, would you prefer her telling you or her keeping her mouth shut?

Despite what buzzfeed tells you (not you 'Dalaran1991) men and women are all around different creatures. A man can disconnect his emotions and just fuck some random girl with no feelings involved an then go right back to his wife/gf an not skip a beat. Women however are predispositioned to be more emotional creatures.

A example I like to use is that a man could hate a particular woman... I mean hate everything about her. But if shes still pretty cute and he finds himself in a situation that he could fuck her with no repercussions or commitment.... he is gonna fuck her.
A woman in that same scenario is not going to fuck some guy she genuinely despises.

[NoMoreTO]

Your mothers advice is sound. If you're serious about her, just leave it in the past. Hey, you went out and banged a girl and feel bad about it, that should be a cure to know you don't want to do it again and want to stay with this chick. You'll have to find ways to spice things up with her if things are a little boring, that can be dangerous.

[General Stalin]

(08-05-2018 10:04 AM)Cr33pin Wrote:  

(08-05-2018 09:30 AM)Dalaran1991 Wrote:  

Let's turn this question around for everyone who says dont tell her and be a man:

If your girlfriend/wife, who is usually faithful makes an error of judgement and cheated on you with a random guy, would you prefer her telling you or her keeping her mouth shut?

Despite what buzzfeed tells you (not you 'Dalaran1991) men and women are all around different creatures. A man can disconnect his emotions and just fuck some random girl with no feelings involved an then go right back to his wife/gf an not skip a beat. Women however are predispositioned to be more emotional creatures.

A example I like to use is that a man could hate a particular woman... I mean hate everything about her. But if shes still pretty cute and he finds himself in a situation that he could fuck her with no repercussions or commitment.... he is gonna fuck her.
A woman in that same scenario is not going to fuck some guy she genuinely despises.

I'd like to talk more about this.

I'm of the belief that a man can fuck a female with absolute-zero strings attached. Literally nothing beyond a primal physical need to get his dick wet and get off. Step above masturbating. Etc. In doing such an act, this can have nothing to do with his relationship with any other female in his life - be it LTR, fiance, wife, etc. He can still love, care about, cherish, and respect them.

Women, on the other hand: I believe a woman can also have NSA sex with a man. No emotion involved, but the difference is that if a woman does this while having a boyfriend/fiance/husband then that means there is a problem with the relationship. It also means she has lost respect for him.

------------------------------------------

To answer OP - if you tell her, the best case scenario is that she acts like she is cool with it, likely never truly trusts you again deep down, and things just go on the way they normally would for the most part. In this "best case scenario" the only thing different than not telling her is that she likely will have trust issues with you going forward. Again, that is the best case.

Worst case is that she leaves you - or worse than that goes postal and stabs you in your sleep or something.

What do you have to gain by telling her?

I'm not telling you what to do, but make a decision based on that.

[Palo_alto]

Appreciate the feedback.

I bang the slut with a condom and then clean up all the apartment after she left. There is absolutely no trace of her being at my place. She is not the crazy type who will make trouble. The slut new I had a girlfriend, and she felt as bad as me after we finish with the carnal activity. I will never see her again or put myself in this type of situation. I guess drinking, again is the epiptomy of my bad decisions.

I met my GF last night. Even though I felt pretty bad on the inside. I was able to cope. We have dinner, watch a movie and basically act like nothing happened. Today I feel a bit better but still rotten on the inside. I guess time will pass. I will not tell her anything.

[Captain Gh]

If you end up following the advice of your mom, and most of the RVF players, nobody would fault you for doing so. However, I want you to view this from a different lens! Let's face it: You're married to this Game Palo! It's obvious from you're style of writing. And I don't blame you for it... since I'm the same way! It's the first time you've cheated on a girl... but c’mon is it the last? Be honest on yourself on this one! I know what MY opinion is! You mentioned she's a bit boring... and that "You have been talking to this girl which you used to fuck maybe 1 year ago". Those 2 quotes alone are all I need to believe that cheating was easily in the cards for you. I believe you're at the crossroads for a player. If you want to be in a serious LTR with a quality girl... then you have to be a quality partner as well.

This is not about the girl… but about your sanity. You've got to make a choice about how you want to proceed in the future: You can either go back to your Banging Ho's & Bimbos ; Keep your mouth shut... OR do what I'll do when I'm ready to settle down : Get a quality chick... and let her know in order to be with a great guy like you... you'll have to get some strange once in a while... either with her present or not! Point Blank Take it or leave it! Total honesty let’s you go a long way. Don’t forget You’ll be living with this lie… not your mother… not your friends… and no one from this Forum. I would advice you to be honest... and decide which direction you want to take. Yeah you can keep your mouth shut... but how long until you do it again?

Pussy is simply too strong of a drug, especially since you seem fantastic at getting it, for you to not cheat again if you don’t tell her. And then you’re back in the same position you’re in. And the more you’ll cheat… the less you’ll feel. In the end this pattern will hurt the women you’re vibing with … but most importantly… it will Hurt Yourself! The reason you gotta tell her is not for her… but for YOU. You might lose her… but you’ll be at peace with yourself. Of course I know the argument that men cheating is simply physical & doesn’t mean anything, while women cheating means the emotional attachment to you is over, if not in serious jeopardy.

However, I believe the difference is that we men care when we cheat… and the burden of the lie will manifest itself in one way or another eventually… while women can cheat on you & flip a page like it’s nothing. Keeping your mouth shut is screwing yourself… in order to not hurt her. Very Bad in my book but Hey to each his own. Plus just cuz I know if a woman fucked a dude behind her Beau's back she likely wouldn't tell... makes me want to do the exact opposite... nevermind the consequences

[BlastbeatCasanova]

I feel you man. It's hard to not feel a little guilty getting some slime on the side while you are seeing a quality chick that more than likely isn't hoeing around behind your back. At the same time though, men and women are different and I think if a condom is worn and she is none the wiser, then it's not an issue.

I could say a lot on this subject. I agree with the posters above; don't say anything and if you feel guilty about it then just don't do it again.

[Jeans]

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