[Player_1337]

(08-06-2018 12:32 PM)sonic boom Wrote:  

(08-06-2018 11:39 AM)Player_1337 Wrote:  

(08-06-2018 08:53 AM)sonic boom Wrote:  

However, if you're a 9 or a 10 looks wise but you're game is only average then all you really need in this era is a dating app and you're basically set for at least a decade of the easiest pussy man has ever captured. Girls will literally drive out of town to fuck a 10, these guys don't even need to leave their doorstep to get a new notch. It's just a different era. Guys who lean heavily on looks for high SMV now have a platform that's made exclusively for them. Back in the day they had to go out and compete with other high SMV men who had the ability to use either game or status to compete, but in our new arena of dating guys with looks are laughing all the way to the pussy bank. There is no digital platform that's built to give guys with A+ game an advantage over other men. If your status is high then maybe you can use something like instagram to get some easy kills but it won't be as effective as being a model on tinder.

The ease of looks in tandem with online game/top level pics has been grossly overestimated.

I've made accounts with model and/or high quality pics- and while this is the optimal strategy as you receive many matches and messages, it's still a grind to actually bang (especially without a conventional 'date' which is often a waste of time).
Girls will ignore your messages (definitely less than 10% attempts are successful at getting her straight over), go cold and block you (this was going fairly direct- trying to get to come over without explicitly mentioning sex by around the 5th message the latest). I can't imagine what it's like for average-looking guys and/or guys with no game.

While I've had chicks come over fresh direct and make it easy (small percentage)- there have been girls who come straight over, nothing happens and you never see them again. Many women on are on these apps for validation.

I've tried the model approach before and my results were not the same. A lot of guys have a tendency to do this kind of thing and go with pictures of guys that they think are attractive, but not what women are actually hyper-sexually into. The perfect balance in my experience is somewhere between model and ex-con. Jeremy Meeks is the absolute perfect version of what will get you the easiest pussy just based on looks alone. Model & Felon is what works best rather than say, Model & Faggot, which a lot of guys tend to go for unfortunately in pickup. Just my opinion. Get some pics of a 10/10 guy covered in tattoos and see how it goes.

Women have complimented the photos and opened me. Mysterious/looking away from the camera, heavily bearded guy in visibly good shape (one pic suited up and one shirtless)- only thing I'm missing is the tattoo angle. PM me correspondence of the effortless encounters you've experienced.

I'm not saying it's the wrong approach, it's just not as simple as some describe (i.e. a pussy delivery service).

[sonic boom]

(08-06-2018 12:51 PM)Player_1337 Wrote:  

(08-06-2018 12:32 PM)sonic boom Wrote:  

(08-06-2018 11:39 AM)Player_1337 Wrote:  

(08-06-2018 08:53 AM)sonic boom Wrote:  

However, if you're a 9 or a 10 looks wise but you're game is only average then all you really need in this era is a dating app and you're basically set for at least a decade of the easiest pussy man has ever captured. Girls will literally drive out of town to fuck a 10, these guys don't even need to leave their doorstep to get a new notch. It's just a different era. Guys who lean heavily on looks for high SMV now have a platform that's made exclusively for them. Back in the day they had to go out and compete with other high SMV men who had the ability to use either game or status to compete, but in our new arena of dating guys with looks are laughing all the way to the pussy bank. There is no digital platform that's built to give guys with A+ game an advantage over other men. If your status is high then maybe you can use something like instagram to get some easy kills but it won't be as effective as being a model on tinder.

The ease of looks in tandem with online game/top level pics has been grossly overestimated.

I've made accounts with model and/or high quality pics- and while this is the optimal strategy as you receive many matches and messages, it's still a grind to actually bang (especially without a conventional 'date' which is often a waste of time).
Girls will ignore your messages (definitely less than 10% attempts are successful at getting her straight over), go cold and block you (this was going fairly direct- trying to get to come over without explicitly mentioning sex by around the 5th message the latest). I can't imagine what it's like for average-looking guys and/or guys with no game.

While I've had chicks come over fresh direct and make it easy (small percentage)- there have been girls who come straight over, nothing happens and you never see them again. Many women on are on these apps for validation.

I've tried the model approach before and my results were not the same. A lot of guys have a tendency to do this kind of thing and go with pictures of guys that they think are attractive, but not what women are actually hyper-sexually into. The perfect balance in my experience is somewhere between model and ex-con. Jeremy Meeks is the absolute perfect version of what will get you the easiest pussy just based on looks alone. Model & Felon is what works best rather than say, Model & Faggot, which a lot of guys tend to go for unfortunately in pickup. Just my opinion. Get some pics of a 10/10 guy covered in tattoos and see how it goes.

Women have complimented the photos and opened me. Mysterious/looking away from the camera, heavily bearded guy in visibly good shape (one pic suited up and one shirtless)- only thing I'm missing is the tattoo angle. PM me correspondence of the effortless encounters you've experienced.

I'm not saying it's the wrong approach, it's just not as simple as some describe (i.e. a pussy delivery service).

I did this maybe like 4 years ago, didn't keep a physical record of any of it I just tried it for a couple days.
I don't use tinder or other datings apps anymore so maybe it's changed since then, but it was pretty easy with the right pics.

[RDF]

^
What is the point of even discussing or experimenting with stuff like this? Groundbreaking discovery - good looking dudes get laid more often, especially online where the first thing the girl sees is your pics. Who would've thought...

Meanwhile, plenty of guys who are not particularly good looking are also fucking their fair share of hot girls. These guys are able to make up for worse success online by having good fitness/style, a good social circle, fun/outgoing personality, social media proof, and finally, knowing how to capitalize on when a girl shows moderate signs of interest and seal the deal (ie: GAME).

This looks vs game discussion just leads to analysis paralysis. Maximize both.

[Supreme4ever]

RDF you are correct.

People need to work on themselves. If you know better you do better

[Player_1337]

(08-06-2018 01:26 PM)RDF Wrote:  

^
What is the point of even discussing or experimenting with stuff like this? Groundbreaking discovery - good looking dudes get laid more often, especially online where the first thing the girl sees is your pics. Who would've thought...

Meanwhile, plenty of guys who are not particularly good looking are also fucking their fair share of hot girls. These guys are able to make up for worse success online by having good fitness/style, a good social circle, fun/outgoing personality, social media proof, and finally, knowing how to capitalize on when a girl shows moderate signs of interest and seal the deal (ie: GAME).

This looks vs game discussion just leads to analysis paralysis. Maximize both.

It wasn't meant to a debate of looks versus game.

What I was expressing: in my experience (after exhaustively using multiple apps)- being good looking with top quality/model pics when running online game yields the best possible results, but isn't quite 'easy mode' as it's often portrayed. It's still a huge grind filled with flakes and rejection (both online and in-person) with not nearly as much return as you'd expect.

[sonic boom]

(08-06-2018 01:26 PM)RDF Wrote:  

^
What is the point of even discussing or experimenting with stuff like this? Groundbreaking discovery - good looking dudes get laid more often, especially online where the first thing the girl sees is your pics. Who would've thought...

Meanwhile, plenty of guys who are not particularly good looking are also fucking their fair share of hot girls. These guys are able to make up for worse success online by having good fitness/style, a good social circle, fun/outgoing personality, social media proof, and finally, knowing how to capitalize on when a girl shows moderate signs of interest and seal the deal (ie: GAME).

This looks vs game discussion just leads to analysis paralysis. Maximize both.

The point I was trying to make was that in a different era looks, game, and status were able to compete in the same arena, which is real life interactions. In any context, the best looking guy, the guy with the best game, and the guy with the highest status equally had an opportunity to bang the hottest girl in the room. In this era, it's just a lot easier and more convenient to be a player if your best SMV feature is looks.

[Black Caesar]

If y’all actually went out you would realize how many “high SMV” guys who are good looking, rich, lots of social connects, etc. Etc. Actually have such shit Game they don’t have any idea what to do with everything you all think gives them an edge.

In fact, cause these guys occasionally get easy ass pulls with busted chicks, they often stay right around that level getting layups with chicks that you would pass on.

Plus most true players have some level of discretion and don’t talk the Society with scrubs so you would never hear about what is going on behind the scenes.

[sonic boom]

Meh, I just think the game in general has changed a lot over the last ten years but it rarely gets discussed the way that it should. Just look at all the posts going on in this thread about how being a player is a grind and that it's a difficult lifestyle to maintain. Is it? For some guys it is and for others it isn't. If we're talking about truly high SMV men then getting pussy has never been easier. I think gaming now is much more of a grind than it used to be, especially for nightgaming outside of major cities.

[a beer is enough]

I think that high school and college get overhyped way too much on this forum, most guys were not players during those phases of life like some on this thread say. If anything though, my college years taught me the important lesson of social status in the right crowds if you want to fuck the hottest girls.

Even in college, it was frat guys in the right frats and athletes who were fucking the hottest girls. A lot of these guys were in no way shape or form even close to Channing Tatum in terms of appearance but they had that status to rely on.

I have come to realize that circumstances you fall into are more important than looks, money and even game. I've seen guys who had male model looks settle for average and not get laid a lot due to the kinds of crowds they were forced to be around as well as the environment itself.

A lot of these players just lucked into some really good situations in life which led to them having pussy thrown in their direction.

They were popular in an area where hedonism and hookup culture are encouraged.

They went to a really big party school where women outnumbered men by a lot and rubbed shoulders with the right crowds which led to a lot of things.

Even in my own experience of when I had the most success with hot girls, I felt like it had little to do with me.

The college version of me could easily approach hot girls and strike up a conversation with them but I had no luck because I was not with the right crowds.

The NYC version of me in his early 20s could not do that but because I had two roommates that were socially well connected, it just came to me so naturally.

Opportunity after opportunity came to where having an abundance mentality was easy, I was around too many women every weekend due to my social circle to where I could have cared less of where it went.

Its not just game either, it is all success in life.

I admit that work ethic and personal traits matter but a good deal of it is based on luck. The people you are around, folks you run into, contacts you make and the circumstances you end up in ultimately decide where you want to go in life.

A lot of these players from my experience were raised in circumstances that made it easy for them to fuck hot girls. They had lenient parents, they were raised around a lot of hot girls and they had social connections which came naturally to them.

At the same time, I feel as if as a guy, you have to make the circumstances work for you now that you know this.

So you had a real shitty youth and college experience (aka me), you work to move to better places and surround yourself with better people.

You work to build a lifestyle that gets you the life you want.

You stay mentally strong and chase the dream no matter how much people tell you "it gets old" or how immoral it is, you stay the course.

While a lot of success in life is based on where you were born, who you were raised by, people you were around growing up and the circumstances life presents you; you do all you can now that you have the knowledge to shift circumstances in your favor and make them work for you.

If you have an internet connection and are on this forum, I say you're pretty damn lucky.

[jordypip23]

(08-07-2018 09:12 PM)a beer is enough Wrote:  

I think that high school and college get overhyped way too much on this forum, most guys were not players during those phases of life like some on this thread say. If anything though, my college years taught me the important lesson of social status in the right crowds if you want to fuck the hottest girls.

Even in college, it was frat guys in the right frats and athletes who were fucking the hottest girls. A lot of these guys were in no way shape or form even close to Channing Tatum in terms of appearance but they had that status to rely on.

I have come to realize that circumstances you fall into are more important than looks, money and even game. I've seen guys who had male model looks settle for average and not get laid a lot due to the kinds of crowds they were forced to be around as well as the environment itself.

A lot of these players just lucked into some really good situations in life which led to them having pussy thrown in their direction.

They were popular in an area where hedonism and hookup culture are encouraged.

They went to a really big party school where women outnumbered men by a lot and rubbed shoulders with the right crowds which led to a lot of things.

Even in my own experience of when I had the most success with hot girls, I felt like it had little to do with me.

The college version of me could easily approach hot girls and strike up a conversation with them but I had no luck because I was not with the right crowds.

The NYC version of me in his early 20s could not do that but because I had two roommates that were socially well connected, it just came to me so naturally.

Opportunity after opportunity came to where having an abundance mentality was easy, I was around too many women every weekend due to my social circle to where I could have cared less of where it went.

Its not just game either, it is all success in life.

I admit that work ethic and personal traits matter but a good deal of it is based on luck. The people you are around, folks you run into, contacts you make and the circumstances you end up in ultimately decide where you want to go in life.

A lot of these players from my experience were raised in circumstances that made it easy for them to fuck hot girls. They had lenient parents, they were raised around a lot of hot girls and they had social connections which came naturally to them.

At the same time, I feel as if as a guy, you have to make the circumstances work for you now that you know this.

So you had a real shitty youth and college experience (aka me), you work to move to better places and surround yourself with better people.

You work to build a lifestyle that gets you the life you want.

You stay mentally strong and chase the dream no matter how much people tell you "it gets old" or how immoral it is, you stay the course.

While a lot of success in life is based on where you were born, who you were raised by, people you were around growing up and the circumstances life presents you; you do all you can now that you have the knowledge to shift circumstances in your favor and make them work for you.

If you have an internet connection and are on this forum, I say you're pretty damn lucky.

Nice post man. Look, I think the non-troll posters on this forum are at minimum not incels & are leaps & bounds beyond the incel curse that is starting to plague the new generation of men coming up. I see progress in your way of thinking & your philosophy. It takes time, but I honestly see a lot of success in your future. Just keep thinking positive & take charge. Should be an interesting ride. You still have plenty of youthful years left on your side!

[a beer is enough]

Thanks Jordy.

I wanted to come back to this thread to comment some more after listening to the Dan Bilzerian podcast with Joe Rogan.

The reason you don't see the kinds of guys OP has mentioned become players is because the drive isn't there. If a guy was having success with hot girls in high school and was socially popular, I just do not see any reason he would ever want to pursue the player life after his early 20s or even after college. Most guys I knew who were socially popular in those years have had their fun and they don't have the incentive to chase tail.

In order for guys to really pursue a goal so aggressively and with all of their life, there has to have been some pain associated with it.

An example in sports being how Jordan did not make varsity at one point in high school and countless others of celebs who suffered setbacks in life.

Remember reading a while back that Hugh Hefner was a virgin heading into his 20s.

I even listened to the Joe Rogan podcast with Dan Bilzerian where he mentioned how he didn't get laid a lot growing up.

For men like that, they are forced to keep going mentally and they can deal with the difficulties of the game because it means that much more to them.

I am finding just how tough the game can get and how it is really all a low percentage hit no matter what you do, which is why guys who have that chip on their shoulder or pain from their past can move past it.

They are forced to get creative and they are willing to do it. They hear the people who laughed at them in the past, the ones who pitied them, the girls who friendzoned them, the cool kids who gave them no attention, the hot girls who acted as if they don't exist and the parties they were not invited to.

These are the kinds of guys who will put in tons of work to create a rockstar online dating profile to get matches, be out until 4 AM chasing women, sacrifice their weekends for pussy, dedicate their lifestyle to chasing tail, get creative with it by creating something women want a part of (Hugh Hefner's playboy) and keep on going after the thousands of rejections and countless obstacles that come up.

No sane guy with a good childhood and awesome youth would ever want to put themselves through any of that.

Why would you?

An LTR is so much more stable than chasing pussy night in and night out.

Even marriage is stable and helps you fit in so much better with society compared to being an outcast player still chasing pussy in his 30s.

The drive, the chip on the shoulder, the pain and the desperate need to make up for the past is not there. When it isn't there, you don't see the reason to take good pics for Tinder, be out till 2 AM gaming women, literally move across cities and countries until you keep getting pussy and play the stressful status games that getting hot girls brings.

[DarkTriad]

(08-08-2018 06:58 PM)a beer is enough Wrote:  

Thanks Jordy.

I wanted to come back to this thread to comment some more after listening to the Dan Bilzerian podcast with Joe Rogan.

The reason you don't see the kinds of guys OP has mentioned become players is because the drive isn't there. If a guy was having success with hot girls in high school and was socially popular, I just do not see any reason he would ever want to pursue the player life after his early 20s or even after college. Most guys I knew who were socially popular in those years have had their fun and they don't have the incentive to chase tail.

In order for guys to really pursue a goal so aggressively and with all of their life, there has to have been some pain associated with it.

An example in sports being how Jordan did not make varsity at one point in high school and countless others of celebs who suffered setbacks in life.

Remember reading a while back that Hugh Hefner was a virgin heading into his 20s.

I even listened to the Joe Rogan podcast with Dan Bilzerian where he mentioned how he didn't get laid a lot growing up.

For men like that, they are forced to keep going mentally and they can deal with the difficulties of the game because it means that much more to them.

I am finding just how tough the game can get and how it is really all a low percentage hit no matter what you do, which is why guys who have that chip on their shoulder or pain from their past can move past it.

They are forced to get creative and they are willing to do it. They hear the people who laughed at them in the past, the ones who pitied them, the girls who friendzoned them, the cool kids who gave them no attention, the hot girls who acted as if they don't exist and the parties they were not invited to.

These are the kinds of guys who will put in tons of work to create a rockstar online dating profile to get matches, be out until 4 AM chasing women, sacrifice their weekends for pussy, dedicate their lifestyle to chasing tail, get creative with it by creating something women want a part of (Hugh Hefner's playboy) and keep on going after the thousands of rejections and countless obstacles that come up.

No sane guy with a good childhood and awesome youth would ever want to put themselves through any of that.

Why would you?

An LTR is so much more stable than chasing pussy night in and night out.

Even marriage is stable and helps you fit in so much better with society compared to being an outcast player still chasing pussy in his 30s.

The drive, the chip on the shoulder, the pain and the desperate need to make up for the past is not there. When it isn't there, you don't see the reason to take good pics for Tinder, be out till 2 AM gaming women, literally move across cities and countries until you keep getting pussy and play the stressful status games that getting hot girls brings.

Great post.

[RDF]

^ Co-signed.

One of my best friends from childhood is a good example of this. He's not especially tall or jacked, but he has model facial looks and always has. Lost his virginity at 13 to the hottest girl in our class and has always had the pick of the litter. He's the only person I've ever known who regularly gets approached at bars by genuinely attractive women clearly looking to fuck.

And... he's a serial monogamist. Basically gets into a relationship with a girl for a year (doesn't cheat much as far as I know), breaks up, and then gets with another one. He almost never goes straight home with a chick... I've gotten multiple lays from him passing off girls to me. He's straight up told me that for him, it's so easy that it just fun anymore.

Meanwhile, I had the opposite experience. I had a long-term relationship and more than halfway through college, I had only slept with her. So when we broke up, I was driven to fuck as many women as possible, lack of sleep and health be damned. Now, 4 years after that, I've developed a lifestyle where I have women available to me without having to sacrifice as much in other aspects of life. But it was a grind to get there.

Ironically, he was always jealous of my long relationship, wishing that he had something similar. And meanwhile, I was jealous of him being able to pull a new chick whenever he wanted. I do feel that often times, the grass is always greener on the other side...

[Distant Light]

I guess I'm just a different breed or "affinity"...

Just got out 1st ever monogamy of 3 years, when I objectively look at it NO WHERE NEAR life single...

Also having 8-9 chicks in rotation isn't my thing either...

My bread and butter was ONS and FBs I seen 1x every 1-6 months.

Never went on dates, never had any arguments beyond my GF. Heck one of my FBs almost had a 3some with me because she liked a girl who liked her and I happen to just be there...Sadly by time we head to her place she is blacked out and that is a no go for me.

Overall single life was STRESS-FREE...

Most people can't stomach the alone/downtime, for me that is time to explore and grow outside of social/sexual realms. Only now have I learnt how important it is for me.

However, average dude just wants a GF...I honestly don't get it, I never cared to have a gf...Thought my gf would be different BUT I learnt monogamy just isn't for me. I don't like heroin feelings and being in a bubble of 2.

I also can't relate to people having multiple women on any level beyond fun times & sex. Just how I am

[Suits]

(08-08-2018 06:58 PM)a beer is enough Wrote:  

These are the kinds of guys who will put in tons of work to create a rockstar online dating profile to get matches, be out until 4 AM chasing women, sacrifice their weekends for pussy, dedicate their lifestyle to chasing tail, get creative with it by creating something women want a part of (Hugh Hefner's playboy) and keep on going after the thousands of rejections and countless obstacles that come up.

No sane guy with a good childhood and awesome youth would ever want to put themselves through any of that.

Why would you?

An LTR is so much more stable than chasing pussy night in and night out.

You make it sound like there are only two options.

I know a lot of guys on the forum who at a certain point did have a chip on their shoulders, but worked up a notch count, developed some solid game and no longer operated from the same motivation anymore.

That didn't mean that they shifted into LTRs. Once they learn what works for them and have the right skills, the more astute gamers will develop a knack for having fresh pussy served up to them with a minimum amount of investment.

Choosing LTRs is not a requirement to have stable access to quality pussy.

[Roardog]

(08-10-2018 12:00 AM)Suits Wrote:  

Choosing LTRs is not a requirement to have stable access to quality pussy.

Just got to be a white guy in Asia

[jordypip23]

(08-09-2018 08:57 PM)Distant Light Wrote:  

I guess I'm just a different breed or "affinity"...

Just got out 1st ever monogamy of 3 years, when I objectively look at it NO WHERE NEAR life single...

Also having 8-9 chicks in rotation isn't my thing either...

My bread and butter was ONS and FBs I seen 1x every 1-6 months.

Never went on dates, never had any arguments beyond my GF. Heck one of my FBs almost had a 3some with me because she liked a girl who liked her and I happen to just be there...Sadly by time we head to her place she is blacked out and that is a no go for me.

Overall single life was STRESS-FREE...

Most people can't stomach the alone/downtime, for me that is time to explore and grow outside of social/sexual realms. Only now have I learnt how important it is for me.

However, average dude just wants a GF...I honestly don't get it, I never cared to have a gf...Thought my gf would be different BUT I learnt monogamy just isn't for me. I don't like heroin feelings and being in a bubble of 2.

I also can't relate to people having multiple women on any level beyond fun times & sex. Just how I am

Since I've been divorced this sounds like my destiny. Sort of lived this type of lifestyle before getting into the LTR / marriage as well.

[TheFinalEpic]

Quote:

An LTR is so much more stable than chasing pussy night in and night out.

Even marriage is stable and helps you fit in so much better with society compared to being an outcast player still chasing pussy in his 30s.

The drive, the chip on the shoulder, the pain and the desperate need to make up for the past is not there. When it isn't there, you don't see the reason to take good pics for Tinder, be out till 2 AM gaming women, literally move across cities and countries until you keep getting pussy and play the stressful status games that getting hot girls brings.

This is a fallacy. It's like thinking that having a job is "stable", or that putting your money into one mutual fund is "risk mitigating".

There are men that get absolutely burned when they believed that their "one and only" was faithful and turned out to be banging her boss. They went all in on a woman, with a >50% chance of getting divorced. You're telling me that these are good odds? Give me a six shooter and a bullet, I'd gladly play Russian roulette because at least those odds are 1/6 instead of 1/2. Hell, I'd rather play Russian roulette than have a wife that constantly nags me about shit that doesn't matter, while I lose a little piece of myself on a daily basis. Are there good marriages? Yeah. Are they the norm? I don't think so.

You gotta diversify that portfolio, boy.

You're thinking about this like a guy that disdains women, you have to understand that women's natures are what make them everything we crave. Yeah I get it, flaking and pettiness is what you run into all the time, it happens to the best of us. But, you shouldn't care. You shouldn't be making women a focus of your life. They are the side dish to your existence. You don't satisfy yourself on side dishes, the main course is where you actually get satisfied. Your purpose, your legacy, your empire, that's where you get the bulk of your happiness, not some broad.

Yes, I get where you're coming from with being an "outcast of society" but truthfully, I don't give a fuck what society thinks of me, and nor should you. Society is not something I want to fit in to, especially with how things are going. I used to care, now I feel freedom. You can be successful with women into your 50s and 60s, there's guys on this board that are. Don't tell me that the cut off is the 30s haha.

You need to be having fun in this life. So, whatever that means for you, you should be doing it. For me, I really enjoy the chase. I don't enjoy being settled down for too long, and I like to create memories, because that's all that I'll have in the end anyway.

If you are wasting significant amounts of time (ie. staying out til 2am) then you aren't doing it correctly. Game has not become a staple of your life yet. Man, I talk to beautiful women everywhere. I don't care if they shut me down or drop to their knees immediately. It's fun. It makes me a more social person. I don't think that every player has an underlying chip on their shoulder, maybe we just don't really care that much about societal convention or being locked down.

Maybe we actually enjoy it.

[KeepingItPrettyChill]

Most likely go through a phase of being players, but not many stick with it.

The primary issue for most men is that continuing a never-ending stream of relationships is a lot of effort. There are the obvious upsides-- the sex is novel, the girl is new, and the thrill of the experience can be exhilarating. But there are many downsides to maintaining the lifestyle. For example, I have a date tonight, a date tomorrow during the day, an LTR coming over that night, and then another date the next day at 11:30am. That is a lot to remember and I actually confused where I was supposed to go Sunday morning and Saturday morning during the midst of conversation. Recovered, but still.

Then there is the LTR who wants exclusivity. I have already told her that it is not going to happen, but after enough time with someone, you do get emotionally attached to them. She is 30. It is not at all in her interests to waste time pining after me. I am fine with things as they are, but it nags at me-- this relationship is interfering with her finding a real partner.

These emotional entanglements stack up. We have evolved mostly monogamously for a very long time and our societal norms are all based off of the expectation of a single committed relationship. As you age, your friends start getting married, and if you do not have a partner to bring, you do not get invited to all of the "couples" stuff. Many high value men also want a family. Passing on your genes is really the whole point of sex. The drive to procreate is strong. I do not know about your mothers (unless I do ) but mine is very interested in having grand-kids.

So, in short.
1. It's a lot of work and people prefer the path of least resistance.
2. There is a monogamous drive.
3. There is the desire to procreate and have a family.
4. There is the pressure to procreate and have a family.

Ultimately, I see myself leaving the game in a few years as I do want a family. All of this stuff makes for great memories and I will have a lot to pass on to my son. It should also be useful in both getting and securing a high value woman. But, the endgame is not "bang different chicks into perpetuity", but instead "sire a family". Even if I do get divorced after 10, 15, or 20 years-- I now have heirs in the world. Some financial burden is expected for the benefit. Luckily, my business finances will be kept out of community property, etc.

[Donfitz007]

In my opinion, the best option is to work on being a High-value male, AND have the charisma and game to be a player.

If a High-value male wants to be monogamous its best that he has the game to still have his options open if the relationship fails. He doesn't have to cheat but having multiple women in the friend zone to use accordingly will help him in the long run AND help his relationship. Through my own personal experience and from reading hundreds of threads on here the main reason relationships fail is because a guy becomes a needy beta and she has no respect or fear of losing him so she explores her options. Having your options open gives you that confidence and stops you from being needy.

[a beer is enough]

So a few points in this thread I want to address after reading TheFinalEpic's post.

1. Marriage is comfortable.

It might not be safe or stable but it is comfortable, just like sitting on a couch eating cheetos is more comfortable than working out and eating right. People love comfort, they go towards it and they prefer it above all else. The lack of fear of getting fat from your sedentary lifestyle is no different than wifing up a woman knowing there is a 50% chance of divorce. People want comfort, most do not care for greatness.

2. If you want to sleep with lots of women, you SHOULD be making that a focus of your life and there is a reason for it.

Say your hobby is coding and making computers, you're not going to get hot girls through that. If your hobby involves blogging and writing, you won't get laid there either.

Your hobbies and things you do have to be in conjunction with game, you have to surround yourself with people who are okay with that sort of a life because the second you make loser friends who think sex outside of marriage is a sin or other friends like it, your'e toast.

That's the misconception I've had a lot of debates on this forum on, people hate me for it but I stand by it. This shit requires sacrifices, I have learned that the hard way in recent years.

Even with your situation, you approach women everywhere, that in itself is an investment that most guys are not willing to make.

[TheFinalEpic]

Quote:

Your hobbies and things you do have to be in conjunction with game, you have to surround yourself with people who are okay with that sort of a life because the second you make loser friends who think sex outside of marriage is a sin or other friends like it, your'e toast.

That's the misconception I've had a lot of debates on this forum on, people hate me for it but I stand by it. This shit requires sacrifices, I have learned that the hard way in recent years.

Even with your situation, you approach women everywhere, that in itself is an investment that most guys are not willing to make.

I agree marriage is comfortable, don't get me wrong on this. I think that that's the reason that most men will put up with a woman's shit is that they are comfortable, they don't need to go out of their ways to meet anyone new, and their lives are "stable" even though they are living in quiet desperation.

I completely disagree with the second argument however. Okay, sure you'll sacrifice time in learning game. It'll hurt for a couple seconds when you get rejected. But, the dividends of learning game carry over into every facet of your life. You are now a master of persuasion, able to take rejection without so much as a smirk, and get laid and never be alone anywhere on this planet. You do need to focus on game for a short period, to build a baseline, but after that, it becomes a part of you forever. I can never go back to my old self and not speak to women and be a social guy, it's been ingrained into me because of this.

Dude, there are plenty of us on here that are programmers, philosophers, writers, and who the fuck knows what else. We don't do things because we think they will get us laid. We do things because we enjoy them. The second you start changing yourself or doing things to get a woman, that is the instant that you lose.

Why would you ever be friends with losers? Why would you care what losers think of you? Why would you be "toast"? Get new friends. Stop caring so much, your life is your own to live.

Game becomes a part of your life. You either are becoming better every day of your life or you are regressing, there's no two ways about it. If a guy is unwilling to put in like 5 hours a week maximum to talk to women, then he cannot be helped. I hardly put any time into this shit anymore man, and I am getting laid hand over fist compared to the old me. Sure I "sacrificed" early on with rejections and whatnot, but I'm not the guy out until 3am (unless I feel like it) or getting flaked on. I just don't care, these hoes are all the same man, they don't affect my life anymore than the weather or what's going on in the news.

[cosworth]

Mens biological imperative is unlimited access to unlimited sexuality, its social constructs that put them in relationships.
Probably only the very top 2% of men can achieve the true player lifestyle...

[KiwiTheGermanShepherd]

(08-02-2018 06:38 PM)Bastard Sword Wrote:  

This is something I've been pondering lately.

I was pretty sexually active in college, with a lay count of 32 over four years. I'm out of the dating game now as I am in an LTR, working a 9-5, living in a suburb and generally trying to get my life in order.

One weird thing that I have been noticing is that the vast majority of guys I know are either completely single/forever alone experiencing minimal sexual success, or are in committed relationships like me. I genuinely don't know anyone who is pursuing a player lifestyle. This includes good looking, athletic, fratty dudes -- almost all of them are in committed relationships. On my team at work literally everyone is in a serious relationship. We're not particularly old (mid twenties in general), nor are we living in a conservative place by any means.

It's interesting because we live in the era of Tinder and unprecedented sexual freedom, but in my daily life at least, I see very little of this expressed. Even in college I barely met people who were genuine players or even trying to bang tons of girls. I had the highest notch count of anyone I knew (not to brag, I honestly wish I spent the time doing other things).

Has anyone else noticed this, or does anyone see genuine male promiscuity on a regular basis? I really feel that even for high-SMV men, the default is to be in a relationship with a hot girl.

i rarely see any male promiscuity on a regular basis.....

[JesusChrist]

(08-09-2018 08:57 PM)Distant Light Wrote:  

However, average dude just wants a GF...I honestly don't get it, I never cared to have a gf...Thought my gf would be different BUT I learnt monogamy just isn't for me. I don't like heroin feelings and being in a bubble of 2.

Who says you can't do whatever you want (and have side pieces) when you have a girlfriend? To me a girlfriend is for the sake of convenience. She's there for sex so you don't have to spend precious time chasing tail. Also, always nice to have someone to chat with, especially if you don't have any male friends (because of constantly moving cities etc).