[Alpha_Romeo]

So lately I've been seeing this really cute Polish chick at the coffeeshop I frequent. She kinda keeps to herself, so I haven't spoken with her.

One of the guys who works there, a gay Polish dude, has offered to help me out in arranging an introduction. This dude is amazing with women in that he can disarm their bitch shields like no other. He has some effeminate mannerisms that probably facilitate this.

Anyway, in the course of chatting with her with the view of introducing me, she seems to have developed an attraction to him. For example, she asks him his schedule so she can go to the coffeeshop whenever he is working (and she does). I don't think she knows that he's gay and by that wouldn't be interested. But fuck, it's so freaking obvious no one needs to ask.

Anyway, is this situation FUBAR, or can it be turned around (if so, how?). I'm sure someone might ask why I didn't try talking to her in the first place, so for that there are 2 reasons: 1. She doesn't know I exist/hasn't acknowledged me whenever I have smiled to her or said hello in passing, 2. whenever I do try to talk to girls, they go into retard mode--this has happened to me so many times that I have developed an aversion to trying anymore. Probably rather than cold approach day game, social circle game would work better for me. Hence why the gay dude was trying to help me out by cultivating a social circle. It's not that I have oneitis for this girl, but a single girl in my town is a very rare thing (mostly couples and families).

[musicalprodigy1]

You screwed up, now he looks more alpha. Always go for it, better to fail than be amog'd.

Also, chicks fuck gay guys. All the time. Not a joke.

[torridon747]

Hate to say it but hes right, women fuck gay dudes all the time. I'm always very weary of girls that are bi and/or have that one gay "friend". Women that fuck gay dudes (openly bisexual women are especially guilty of this) have an increased risk for STDs and as far as I'm concerned are shitty annoying people.

As far as your girl is concerned I would forget about it for now, if you see her again introduce yourself and be more aggressive, nobody is going to serve pussy up to you on a silver platter it's your job to go get it.

[Geomann180]

My advice is to find someone else. Like Eugenics said, bi girls are a huge risk for STDs compared to normal girls due to the company they keep.

Also - how well do you know this gay Polish dude? I'm wary of free favors from people I don't know well.

G

[Rhyme or Reason]

I think you went wrong here:

Quote:

One of the guys who works there, a gay Polish dude, has offered to help me out in arranging an introduction. This dude is amazing with women in that he can disarm their bitch shields like no other.

Relying on someone else to make the introduction, especially someone "amazing with women" is going to make you look like an afterthought.

By having him introduce you you're mitigating any impact you might have had on her had you done it yourself. It makes you seem like you have less presence and that you need "permission" to act. You should just do what you want.

It seems like it's his show, he just tossed you a bone. She saw that.

Also, just a word of advice...don't associate with fags on a friendly basis.

[Alpha_Romeo]

Well this is interesting, especially the comments about women fucking gay dudes. While I am sure women would probably be down for that, it's the gay dudes that won't be having any of it. Most gay dudes I have known are pretty grossed out by vaginas.

Anyway, as for the chick, all is good. I ran into her somewhere in town and chatted her up. Things are now going in the direction I was hoping for.

[torridon747]

How well do you know them? Some fags are tougher and have more game than people give them credit for. Think about it, they were picked on since they weree young and had to fight. They had to play social games by a different set of rules since they were young also. I gurantee you a gay dude would fuck an 8 no problem after a few drinks.

Glad things are working out tho

[Beyond Borders]

(07-11-2018 02:23 AM)Alpha_Romeo Wrote:  

2. whenever I do try to talk to girls, they go into retard mode--this has happened to me so many times that I have developed an aversion to trying anymore.

Never mind the problem with the gay dude and the one girl.

Elaborate on this.

[Alpha_Romeo]

^Most recent example would be a Polish girl that lives in my neighborhood (different girl from one mentioned in OP). While out and about I would pass by her and notice her looking at me. After noticing this a few times, I started to smile at her, and she would smile back. And then after that I would say hi or hello and she would do the same. Then one day I saw her and thought "fuck it..." so I went over and struck up a conversation (well, tried). I said something like, "Hi... I'm X... " There was an awkward pause, so I asked her name (which she told me). However, she had this uncomfortable, almost horrified, look on her face and deliberately looked off in other directions to avoid looking at me. It wasn't a language issue (I think) because I've seen her chatting in English with other non-Polish. Anyway, that's how it went down. I just walked on, thinking how strange it was. But this isn't the first time this has happened to me. I get it quite often. I suppose I should stop walking around my neighborhood drooling with a giant dildo in hand (j/k). Probably relevant to the story that I am a 3.5-4 at best, but I do try to take care of myself, dress well, look presentable and behave like a decent human being.

[Roswell87]

Honestly you shoulda have talk to her the first time you two made eye contact or at least the second time seeing her in the shop. That other guy introducing you to her will cause her to perceive you as a guy no balls or confidence to do these his own approaching

[Alpha_Romeo]

^A valid point. I think I am just becoming increasingly jaded at the seemingly bizarre blowouts I seem to have been getting over the past couple of years. It's one thing for a girl to say, "no, thanks, I have a boyfriend" or "no, thanks, I'm not interested." But more often than not, I am either insulted or girls just react in a way that is just retarded.

[Frank Rook]

Gotta free yourself from outcome expectation. That's a mindset thing. Just take control of when and how you want to interact with a chick.

I was at a stand up comedy event recently with a girl. Noticed another attractive girl. Opened her with casual conversation at the bar area as my girl went to the toilet during the break. Very polite and articulate. Turns out she was with someone. And that was it. No outcome expectation. I just wanted to have a quick chat because I wanted to. Either way a win for me as I wanted to kill time and practice chatting up another attractive girl.
Get those small wins.

Why do you describe yourself as rating a 3.5 or 4?