No prob --
Raising value = doing things FOR YOU, not for women. It's less about the acheivements that make you more attractive, it's that inner sense of accomplishment, internal locus of control and healthy self-pride that radiate sexiness.
Glad you went out and approached a lot. That experience teaches things words can't.
"Meeting more" is always a solid answer, agreed.
Here's the thing: I also understand the "used car salesman" vibe when you are texting some girl whose number you got, hoping she'll give a shit.
The way to avoid it: make a REAL connection with a girl, or else don't ask for the number.
To explain: say you approach 10 girls some evening, do it for the enjoyment and sheer ease of getting some smiles and opening girls out of their shell. Have zero expectations. Don't ask for numbers of the girls who seem to like you.
Instead, see how far you can get with either an instadate [hey I have another 30 to kill, want to grab a drink around the corner?] -- or make a plan for a day2 right there face-to-face [hey, we should do "this" again, you free Tuesday? we can ___."].
Even if she says no to the instadate, then you are primed to ask about "next Tuesday".
If she says yes to that, then you know she will respond to further comm after you get her number.
If she isn't that into it, just smile and say "well I had to try" with a confident DGAF smile.
The point is work with what you have in your actual face-to-face interactions. Don't see it as a ramp up to "getting digits".
It's a ramp up to "do I even like her personality? does she dig me? have we agreed to see each other again based on this chance encounter [which hopefully did not look like an obvious approach]?"
"Make the ho say no" or "get to a yes" are useful thoughts to have. Don't think about numbers.
Pretend any number you get that wasn't accompanied by verbal acceptance of plans before asking, will lead nowhere. Good experiment.
Quote: (05-06-2018 09:03 PM)Compendium Wrote:
Thanks for the feedback. The rap charts were entertaining.
This doesn’t come from sitting around doing nothing. It comes from moving downtown in a big city, approaching a lot and getting a lot of numbers just to have them all fizzle out and go nowhere. Countless hours wasted contemplating text message strategy. The whole time feeling like some bigger picture thing must be wrong.
“action and balls” seem to create enough attraction to get numbers. But while trying to setup day2s, I cannot seem to hit a spot between “used car salesmen vibe” shutting the whole thing down, vs them just becoming indifferent to me and ignoring me. I get the feeling every women that I deal with in this city feels that better options are right around the corner.
I’ve been becoming more and more skeptical of “raise value” methods. I feel like I’m hitting the limits of progress with them. Most seem to demand faking your personality, long time commitments with minimal results, or being pushed out of your home country. Maybe I’m just getting older and less willing to change for people.
So what’s the moral of all this? I’m not sure. Maybe I’ll try to focus more energy on just meeting more women and not waste so much time on “value raising”. And maybe try to think of ways to screen the women I’m meeting more toward ones who would value me as-is and where-is.