[Quizzical]

I'm a complete and utter noob. I've only been red pilled for two weeks and I still don't know how to really do anything with women. Searching through the forums has been a massive eye opener, but I've been exposed to many, many unique points on all aspects of game that it gets a bit confusing.

Now, onto my problem. There's this one girl I'm trying to get into a relationship with(she's a druggie, from a house with no father, very insecure and weird)and I think that's the problem. I'm borderline obsessed with her. I can't bring myself to try and pursue other girls because I really like her. I know this is bad, but I don't know how I can just push aside my feelings and put her on the wayside.

Secondly, I get rather insecure around her. Especially when she's around other guys. This is the epitome of beta behaviour, and I've gotten much better about it in the recent weeks, but I still feel a level of insecurity when I'm around her or see her talking with other people.

Overall, I'm afraid she's a lost cause, and that I may as well call it quits and just move on. This entire saga has been a huge disaster for me. But I would like to sleep with her still.

Thank you for any help/advice given.

[Captain Gh]

If you're young... the good news is that you probably won't get her... since she'll be chasing Bad Boy D. In the meantime... read read read game literature along with the Forum. In a couple of years... you''ll be laughing at this Post!

[ProGambler]

Lose your virginity first. Then you'll see these girls are a garbage by-product of an absolutely broken society.

[PainPositive]

Welcome to the forum OP. I'm glad you're here. You have a long road ahead and I wish you lots of success. Read the newbie forum and ask a lot of questions. It's going to take a long time but a year or less from now you will realize this girl is a complete waste of you time. Forget about her.

Go talk to lots of other girls and read some game books and forums. Don't look for anyone peddling "advanced" game shit. Just get out there and start opening girls, get their numbers, get them out on dates, back your apartment, into your bed, naked, and inside of them. The more times you do this the better you will get with women.

And remember nothing else counts besides dick in pussy. Enjoy the process of getting closer and closer but always shoot for the bang.

Good luck!

[kaotic]

Quiz, this is going to hurt, but I'm doing it for your own good:


She was a lost cause right after you mentioned she's a druggie and fatherless.

You deserve better than that - and she'll wreck you.

You aren't capable of handling a female like that, even to bang.

Anytime you think of not being able to be with her, picture he being tag teamed by 2 Chad Thundercocks.

And yes she's probably fucking someone else and isn't interested in you.


KNOCK - THAT - GIRL - OFF - THAT - PEDESTAL

You're way too emotionally invested in a girl who hardly gives a shit about you.


Now onto the more positive:

As others mentioned, you sound pretty young, and you've got a huge set of tools on this forum to master.

This girl will be in your rear view mirror in no time and you'll forget about her.

Especially when you get better prospects in your future.

You need to focus on yourself - and start asking the why's about how you feel, your emotions, your reasoning.

[Quizzical]

Thank you for the advice; but I don't quite understand why I have to picture her getting railed by two dudes. It just grosses me out and almost makes me angry.

[HankMoody]

I hate to tell you this, but she's a lost cause and a total waste of your time.

Go to the gym, go make some cash, and get a hobby. Maybe jiu jitsu or woodworking, it doesn't matter. Whatever you think is fun and fulfilling.

She's going to suck and fuck other dudes. Such is life.

If you ever think to yourself "I wonder if she's fucking someone else...", you have my assurance that she is.

[kaotic]

Quiz get used to it - every girl you've met has probably sucked and fucked another guy - Hank just made my point.

You can't get angry if a girl fucks another dude and you aren't committed to eachother - she doesn't owe you shit, just like you don't owe her.

Secondly my example was to make you wash that angelic pussy off that pedestal because she isn't worth your time.

[Rhyme or Reason]

Kaotic and Hank already nailed the salient points; ie her being a druggy fuckup is a nonstarter.

In the interest of gauging where you're at, i'd like to know:

a) what you mean by 'wanting to get into a relationship with her' (what is your current status...orbiter? stalker? Best friend? Are you fucking her or not? Something tells me not)


b) how it's been a 'total disaster'

[Quizzical]

a) I want a LTR with her. At least used too. Used to be an orbiter, now I'm just not even going to continue talking with her anymore. Unfortunately, if she hit me up or took me up on my date offer(I offered a park date on Friday, she ignored the text.)I would do it.

b)I cucked to her a few times. I listened to her vent about her cheating boyfriend and was just sort of acting like a beta. Even wrote long text messages calling her a good friend and how I appreciated her and shit like that. From the beginning, I wanted to bang/be with her, but played it off like I just liked her like a friend and acted as her personal diary.

I think any hope I had died three last week. She's not interested. It's time to move on for me. Time to go out and begin gaming other girls and enjoying life.

[lazy]

(12-10-2017 11:55 PM)Quizzical Wrote:  

I listened to her vent about her cheating boyfriend and was just sort of acting like a beta. Even wrote long text messages calling her a good friend and how I appreciated her and shit like that.

Forget it, she'll never see you as a man.

In any case, you're dodging a bullet here. Trust me. I've been in an LTR with a girl with a similar background. Predictably, it was a fucked up relationship that really messed me up. Girls like that are damaged goods, it's unfortunate but it's the truth. You deserve better. Wish her the best and move on.

[LINUX]

An honest post from a man with problems --that's rare. I like it.

I'm sure that you know that you would be crazy to marry this girl, I know you would be crazy, and everyone on the forums knows you would be crazy.

But it seems, that your question is why are you attracted to such a train wreck?

The answer to that is sexual tension. A masculine (logical, rational) man will always be attracted to complete fucking train wrecks of a woman. It's that tension (ebb and flow) ( rational/irrational) that gets us going. Remember that sexual tension (lust) and a happy marriage or (LTR) are two different concepts and are not related.

That's why we jerk off to babysitters, taxi-cab sluts, and hoes that will suck a dick to keep from going to jail because they stole some stuff from the pawn shop. We're not really lining up to fap one off to the nice girl down the street who cooks, cleans, plays the trombone and collects stamps. All married men secretly dream about fucking the 18 year old neighbor next door that is selling candy bars, waiting to give you a good time if you buy the whole box, and then he wakes up and realizes it was only a dream and his prize is beside him, in the same jogging pants, the same beat up pussy, kids screaming in the background. That's life. Welcome to marriage.

Your feelings are normal and part of the process of you learning what you're sexually attracted to. Just don't commit to her or allow yourself to become venerable because you will get hurt, but the attraction is completely normal and nothing to be confused about.

You might want to pick up the book "Way of the Superior Man" which will help you understand why you feel this way in terms of sexual tension in a broader context than I can explain.

[RatInTheWoods]

THATS A GOLD POST LINUX.

God I love this forum.


OP remember some childhood obsession you had when you were five? A toy, a blanket, a comforter? How you couldn't imagine life without it, or ever growing out of it?

Thats this woman man.

Stay with us, and you will laugh at this post and get much, much better women than her.

[HankMoody]

I have some bad news, and some good news.

First, the bad news. Your ship is sunk here. She's never going to become your girlfriend. Even if she did, she'd cheat on you all the time and you'd be miserable. You acted like a beta and she views you as one. Such is life.

Now, the good news. You'll get over this. You'll develop into a man that women love, and other men want to be. In a year from now, you'll laugh about the time you were obsessed with a drug addicted whore, and barely have the time to unlock your phone and tailor a two word response to her vapid text messages. Pain can be a good medication.

[questor70]

(12-11-2017 12:55 AM)LINUX Wrote:  

But it seems, that your question is why are you attracted to such a train wreck?
The answer to that is sexual tension.

I don't think that's the attraction in all cases...

I think both genders have their fixer-upper pattern. With women it's the Frog Prince and for men it's My Fair Lady syndrome. I think in either case the objective is to feel as though by intervening in somebody's life you're permanently improving them, sort of like how George Bailey went around and saw how much worse his town would have been if he had never been born.

So it's the desire to make a positive mark on the women who come and go in your life rather than just adding notches to a bedpost.

Of course, the reality is that leopards rarely change their spots.

Another way of saying it is that when you pedestalize, you see her as primarly a victim of bad luck and circumstance and discount the role she played in creating or perpetuating her misery. This is a terrible blind spot I constantly have to fight.

There's no greater disappointment for me than making a huge investment towards bettering a woman's life only to see them go back to the way they were before as if nothing had ever happened. I have learned the hard way that dating someone for what you think they can be rather than who they already are is not a good idea.

[Gothica]

I feel for you, man. I was prone to the same sort of thinking myself, to the point where once I thought I was cursed or something. I was the consummate white knight, riding to the rescue of broken and messed-up women, but never understanding why the ones I fell for didn't ever work out right. Only after I got red-pilled did I realize the way my own behaviors set me up for frustration and bitterness. You need to understand a few things:

1.) People's expectations come from their circumstances, and they will set up such circumstances again. Even if you were to successfully pair up with her, your beloved will find a way to make her life hell again. If you manage to "fix" everything, she will somehow sabotage things, either cheating on you, screwing up your life or finances, or leaving you.

2.) People are resistant to change. Just because you have started to learn how things really work, it does not follow that your emotions will not betray you. I still have strong feelings for someone I fell for 14 years ago, even though my wife and I reconciled after that (funny how women will change their tune once they realize you have other options). You have to focus on what is real, not what you wish was real.

3.) Go out with other women! Your frustrated passion for this troubled chick will help keep you from losing your frame with them. Since your heart is already taken by your "one true love", you will be able to establish satisfying, worthwhile relationships without your emotions betraying you. I started dating my wife the day after I dumped someone with whom I was very infatuated, but who just wasn't a good match for me.

4.) Once you're off the market and dating someone else, expect your dream girl to show more interest in you. Read what was written above again and resist the temptation to pick things up with her. If you do, you WILL regret it.

[Gothica]

I may help to contemplate the reasons why the last guy that dumped your "one" did so. She has significant flaws: Put yourself in the place of the guy who was sick of her issues. Imagine how her drug use and emotional issues would drive you nuts in the long term.

I know exactly what I'm talking about: Dating "fixer-uppers" was my idiom for years. I married a "fixer-upper" and she drove me bats for years. She threatened that she would make sure I was broke and never saw my kids if I left her. Things didn't change until I decided enough was enough and packed my things to leave.

The moral of the story: Troubled chicks are a lot of work. If you don't hold all the power in the relationship, they will make you hurt.

[ksbms]

(12-14-2017 08:03 PM)questor70 Wrote:  

There's no greater disappointment for me than making a huge investment towards bettering a woman's life only to see them go back to the way they were before as if nothing had ever happened. I have learned the hard way that dating someone for what you think they can be rather than who they already are is not a good idea.

True that!

I think some small, incremental changes are possible, especially with really young girls. But it has to be served in such a way a girl thinks it's her idea to make things better. On the whole, probably not worth time investment unless gearing towards making her mother of your kids.

[keithdabartender]

This reminds of me back when I was in highschool and liked this girl and I acted the same way with her. She even went to prom with me and I told her I liked her (so bad I know), she rejected me, but insisted we stay friends. I find out from another friend that she was seen blowing some older dude in his car. Ended up not talking to her anymore after finding that out.

Moral of the story: you're gonna get your heart broken, might as well get used to it.

[RedPillUK]

(12-08-2017 01:02 PM)Quizzical Wrote:  

Thank you for the advice; but I don't quite understand why I have to picture her getting railed by two dudes. It just grosses me out and almost makes me angry.

That's exactly why Kaotic's advice is pure genius.

You have to picture her getting banged by two, maybe even three or four Chad Thundercocks. Hell maybe even three or four Tyrone Mandingos as well.

If it makes you feel so bad you cringe and shut your eyes and start to get angry at the person saying it. You're still pedestalising her and you haven't swallowed the red pill yet. And if you get involved with her you will become blue pill and delusional once again. You have to remember she's a slut, and not even a good one.