[Constantine]

Hey guys, I've been a reader of this forum for a few months now, and have read most of BANG at this point. Great stuff. I have a few questions and issues I'm still kind of unclear with at this point that deal with my specific situation.

A quick background about me. I recently got out of a LTR and sort of discovered this whole game thing. I'm 25, I would guess somewhere above average in looks, and know that a few girls at my work are interested in me, and everyone at work is to some degree part of the same social circle. Here are my questions:

1) There are two girls from work I'm interested in. In this situation will I esentially have to pick one girl given the circumstances? If I'm seen or heard to be with one (one girl won't actually be working there anymore after this week) will that give me a DHV or will that likely give the other girl a "well screw him then" attitude? Also, if it makes a difference, one girl I'm more interested in physically and just hooking up with at least once, the other I feel like I'd be more interested in possibly hanging out with for longer term.
2) Related question. At this point, I guess I don't even understand what is socially acceptable in terms of dating after being in a LTR for so long. If I do anything from kissing and beyond, will the girl expect a relationship of some sort? Will trying to hit this point with both girls be suicide for my situation? How do I get to the point I want with girls without them expecting a LTR? When do you tell them your true intention or that you're not looking for a relationship? I'd like to do it without being a jerk or straight up lying to them. How do you guys handle multiple girls? Do you keep them secret from eachother, is it acceptable for them, or do you just tend to have very short periods of being with each girl because they either leave when they find out about other girls, or you ditch them when they're not ok with it?
3) Good date ideas and locations. I ask this because I don't drink and a lot of girls I'm into are under 21, and there's likely to be more in the future. At this point I'm really at a loss for "date" ideas that don't involve alcohol and allow for a good time and good chances for kino. Somewhere I can take girls I haven't escalted with yet, so something fairly cheap, fun, and with chances to kino. It seems easy but I've been having an unusually tough time thinking of anything that seems good. Something like going for coffee just seems too random and boring for me... but maybe I'm just weird. I live in SoCal by the way.
4) Any good locations for the actual hookup when both of you live at home besides the typical car, hotel (not paying for that), or being lucky enough to get a house where no one is home? Car seems the best option... but any good places you guys use where you can park your car somewhere secluded/private that doesn't have security or anything patrolling?
5) Kino. All right, this is a decent issue in my game. I notice I have a hard to finding an excuse to kino. I've read a lot about it but have trouble using it when the time comes. I know you start off slow, but simple gestures like the arm touch, or touching their side/back are difficult, because I feel like I never have a "reason" to do it that won't come off super random and forced or awkward. The ones where you play games with their hands make sense to me, because it's natural and there's a reason, but the others that don't give me problems. Is it something you just have to shamelessly go for, or are there smoother ways I'm not understanding?

So to wrap up, I'm wondering how to handle this situation with the two girls I feel I have a chance at without messing it up, and how to handle seeing multiple girls in general. And also at getting smoother with my kino while on dates that I seem to have issues initiating. Also I should mention I'd prefer not to hurt girls, I consider myself a nice guy and don't want to be a jerk and hurt them. If it was random girls I didn't really already know or care about that's a different story, but though I should mention that. I also wanted to mention I have used the search feature quite a few times before I decided to make this thread, these are issues and questions I still have after doing some research. Sorry if I'm repeating anything that seems common.

Thanks guys, sorry for the long post.

[haywire]

(09-10-2011 10:11 PM)Constantine Wrote:  

1) There are two girls from work I'm interested in. In this situation will I esentially have to pick one girl given the circumstances? If I'm seen or heard to be with one (one girl won't actually be working there anymore after this week) will that give me a DHV or will that likely give the other girl a "well screw him then" attitude? Also, if it makes a difference, one girl I'm more interested in physically and just hooking up with at least once, the other I feel like I'd be more interested in possibly hanging out with for longer term.

In general, gaming at work is NOT recommended unless you're working for a 500+ organization and in different departments. But since in this case one girl is leaving the place, she becomes a natural choice.

Quote:

2) Related question. At this point, I guess I don't even understand what is socially acceptable in terms of dating after being in a LTR for so long. If I do anything from kissing and beyond, will the girl expect a relationship of some sort? Will trying to hit this point with both girls be suicide for my situation? How do I get to the point I want with girls without them expecting a LTR? When do you tell them your true intention or that you're not looking for a relationship? I'd like to do it without being a jerk or straight up lying to them. How do you guys handle multiple girls? Do you keep them secret from eachother, is it acceptable for them, or do you just tend to have very short periods of being with each girl because they either leave when they find out about other girls, or you ditch them when they're not ok with it?

Listen, just because you have kissed and fucked a few times does not in anyway mean it HAS to evolve into an LTR, and this includes the girl's perspective as well. No woman(excluding virgins and really inexperienced ones), let alone men, want to be in any LTR unless there is a clearly established sexual and mental connection. Most single people with options are simultaneously dating many others till there is a discussion and commitment about exclusivity from both sides, and that usually happens atleast a month and 5-7 dates into it. Ofcourse, I wouldn't recommend lying or being a jerk either so if she brings up exclusivity at any point you can tell her you just got out of an LTR and don't feel emotionally and mentally ready for a full fledged commitment. You'll be surprised to know the amount of women who themselves DO NOT want serious relationships.

Quote:

3) Good date ideas and locations. I ask this because I don't drink and a lot of girls I'm into are under 21, and there's likely to be more in the future. At this point I'm really at a loss for "date" ideas that don't involve alcohol and allow for a good time and good chances for kino. Somewhere I can take girls I haven't escalted with yet, so something fairly cheap, fun, and with chances to kino. It seems easy but I've been having an unusually tough time thinking of anything that seems good. Something like going for coffee just seems too random and boring for me... but maybe I'm just weird. I live in SoCal by the way.

How about 18+ dance clubs?

And for 21+ girls just go to a bar and order seltzer and tell her its bacardi. Even better if you make friends with the bartender and order bacardi and get seltzer in actuality!

Usually, bars and clubs are the best but you could also just walk around a happening street or area and people-watch, that also makes for a good date. Another option is bowling(but it might appear a little trashy).

Quote:

4) Any good locations for the actual hookup when both of you live at home besides the typical car, hotel (not paying for that), or being lucky enough to get a house where no one is home? Car seems the best option... but any good places you guys use where you can park your car somewhere secluded/private that doesn't have security or anything patrolling?

You're 25 and you don't live by yourself? That could be a major logistical bitch. Otherwise, parking lots/secluded spots on the beach/parks.

Quote:

5) Kino. All right, this is a decent issue in my game. I notice I have a hard to finding an excuse to kino. I've read a lot about it but have trouble using it when the time comes. I know you start off slow, but simple gestures like the arm touch, or touching their side/back are difficult, because I feel like I never have a "reason" to do it that won't come off super random and forced or awkward. The ones where you play games with their hands make sense to me, because it's natural and there's a reason, but the others that don't give me problems. Is it something you just have to shamelessly go for, or are there smoother ways I'm not understanding?

Basically, you gotta make it appear natural and it should flow logically from the conversation and circumstances. Like if she says she's working out to increase physical strength you could say "ok let me see how tough you've gotten. lets arm-wrestle". Or like if you're walking together and she trips you could hold her, or while crossing the road if there's a car coming fast.

[Franky87]

If you dont have your own place, try to use her place. The 'I have to use the bathroom' line works for gaining entry.

[Constantine]

Thanks Haywire, I appreciate the advice and information. I guess getting your own place is kind of a necessity for the long term. Basically I'm still with my parents to avoid unnecessary financial burden until my career gets going, which will hopefully be sooner than later. I should have also mentioned my current job is just a lame part time deal, and I hope to not be there more than 6 months more or so, so I'm not really too worried about that whole dynamic.

Thanks Franky, unfortunately they live with their parents as well, but definitely a good line to remember for the future.

Still open to any advice and information, any further kino tips would help a lot. Thanks.

[JoyStick]

dude, i'm 25 myself and recently moved back home 'cause i lost my job. as long as your parents don't mind you bringing bitches over, staying at home isn't as big of a deal as you'd think. roosh have a couple good articles about it on his blog. the site won't allow me to link you because this is my first post, but i'll write the name of the articles and you could find it yourself by using the search box.

/getting-laid-while-unemployed-and-living-in-your-dads-basement

/dont-let-anyone-tell-you-that-you-need-money-to-get-laid

[Staged]

Honestly, for kino dude just make it a gradient. Start doing quick light touches and slowly ease into the long sustained holds.

[Staged]

And since I'm already here, girls at work should be played off like social circle game. Which means you're not going to go balls out and shoot her with tons of attraction material. Instead take it easy and get her to slowly become more and more attracted to you.