Long story, but worth it.
College is that magical place in life where you can “start over.” Wipe the slate clean of all the shameful shit you’ve done up to this point and truly become a new person. ‘Spread your wings and fly’ they said. Talk to anyone and everyone. Rivy, Dan and myself were freshman year roommates, and we did just that.
The dorm hall was a long chain of newfound friends. Some of these people would fizzle out over the next four years, others I’m happy to say I can still call my best friends. We were a tight-knit hallway. Everyone liked everyone and we all got along.
Our room was in the dead center of the hall. We’d leave our door open and extend an invitation to all our hall mates to come and chill. Whether we were smoking pot, playing video games, watching TV or just kicking back, there was never a dull moment or a bad vibe.
Then Angelica moved in…
It was halfway through first semester when a bed opened up in our friend Brenda’s room. Angelica was on a transfer list. Brenda was a one of our closer friends, so we told her to bring Angelica over to hang for a night, as to welcome her into our little community.
Angelica was a zero-fucks-given half Italian half Lebanese girl with a crippling case of the crazies. She talked with a thick New York/Mona-Lisa Vito accent. Ya know, “Fuck you, fuck him, fuck her and fuck anybody that looks like her.”
“Do you smoke weed?” Dan asked.
“Yea,” she responded
“We were gonna go smoke if you wanna thrown down.”
“I ain't got anything.”
This wasn’t a problem at first. We were happy to welcome a ‘new friend’ and didn’t mind smoking her up. We went outside, sat in our favorite smoking spot and rotated a pair of spliffs. Angelica was one of those, ‘Never shuts the fuck up when their high,’ kind of people. I myself occasionally suffer from the same side effect, but we’ve all got our pitfalls.
Granted, everything she said was a little humorous. I’d shut my eyes and picture Marisa Tomei, but if Marisa Tomei had just packed a fresh lip of Copenhagen Wintergreen.
We ended up back in the dorm room, turned on our favorite ‘high’ channel, TruTV , and were happy to find that a new episode of Hardcore Pawn was airing. But oh wait, Angelica wouldn’t stop talking.
“This shit’s all fake. They stage everything. How can you watch this? This is gay. Let’s smoke more. Do you have any booze?”
Yea, I know the show is probably fake. But let me a pretend for a fucking minute, will ya? No, we aren't smoking again, it’s been 5 minutes, and no, you’re not having any of our booze.
The Hardcore Pawn marathon ended. A normal human being would take the hint that everybody crawling into bed and turning the lights off meant the party was over and to kindly get the fuck out. Angelica was not a normal human being. Brenda tried to get her to leave, but she insisted on staying. Rivy and I didn’t know how to handle the situation, so we just rolled over in bed and tried to fall asleep. Dan left the room to shit and brush his teeth and hoped that Angelica would be gone by the time he returned. But oh was he mistaken. Once Dan left the room, Angelica climbed up in his bed. Brenda admitted defeat and left.
Now, Dan and Rivy had bunk beds and Dan had the top bunk. My bed was across the room and elevated over my dresser. It was as if I had top bunk, but there was nobody under me. Basically, I could look to my right and see Dan’s bed.
Dan returned, climbed up to his bunk and laid down next to Angelica. Complete and utter silence ensued for the next twenty minutes. I’ll never forget the conversation Rivy and I texted each other.
‘Are they…’ –Rivy ‘What? – Me ‘Fucking?’ – Rivy ‘Nah, Dan’s got standards.’ – Me
That’s when Angelica hopped down from Dan’s bed and left without saying a word. Dan then hopped down and turned the lights on. The three of us clearly had way too much to say to each other, but Dan, standing in the middle of the room, had the floor.
“I fucked her,” he said with a wide grin.
“What the fuck?” Rivy and I exclaimed.
“Got her to leave, didn’t I?”
“Well, yea… but why?” I asked.
“Dinner was on my plate and I had to eat,” Dan responded. To this day, that is still in my top 5 quotes from college.
Angelica kept coming around. In her mind, we were best friends. I try to give everyone I meet a fair chance, but holy fucking shit was this girl annoying. We decided, okay, one more chance. Some friends of ours were throwing a party one weekend at a house off campus. We thought we’d bring Angelica along in the hopes that she would meet new people and make other friends.
The party was actually pretty fun. I was the only one in the group with a car so I usually ended up being the driver in these situations. I didn’t mind it thought. I was never one that had to be drunk to have fun. The same can’t be said for the others thought. Especially poor Brenda. I’ve never seen her as shit-housed drunk as she was that night. Brenda could usually hold her own, but it got to the point where I became concerned. I gathered the troops and said that the party bus was leaving. Rivy and Dan understood. Angelica though, insisted on staying. She said it was Brenda’s fault for getting too drunk and she wasn’t going to let her ruin the night. Now, she may have been right in the sense that it was Brenda’s fault, but you don’t treat your “friend”/roommate like that. I told her we’d leave her there if she didn’t come now. After a few more minutes of arguing she finally came with us. Poor Brenda was slouched over in the car in complete drunken misery. It was only a ten minute drive back to campus, but to her it must have felt like an eternity. We finally pulled up next to our building and Rivy and Dan helped Brenda out of the car. If you’ve ever tried to lift dead weight, you’d know that it’s not as easy at it sounds. Dan and Rivy ended up dropping Brenda on the ground. Thankfully she didn’t hit her head or anything. As for Angelica? She left and walked back into the building and offered no help with her roommate. We made it back to their room, but Brenda was too drunk to put her security code in. We knocked and knocked. We knew Angelica was in there, but she didn’t answer. Finally, she ripped the door open.
“What! I’m trying to go to bed!”
“Jesus Christ, Angelica, help us get Brenda in her bed!”, Rivy hollered.
“No, she’s going to puke and I can’t sleep if the room smells like vomit!”
“What the fuck is wrong with you?!” we answered back.
The three of us barged past her and put Brenda in her bed. Dan moved a trash bucket next to her and we left.
This was the last straw. No more chances. We didn’t know how to get a person like Angelica out of our lives without repercussions. How do you tell someone you don’t want to be their friend? Especially now-a-days when everyone’s got their safe spaces full of green grass and rainbows?
The three of us all felt the same way about Angelica. The three of us also felt the same way about Jack Daniels. We decided to make things interesting. A bottle of Jack would be awarded to the roommate that could go the longest without speaking to Angelica. The game was on.
We’d go to absurd lengths to avoid this girl. Our friends Mike and Brian lived at the other end of the hallway. In order to not risk Angelica walking out of her room as we passed by, we’d go up a flight of stairs, down the 2nd floor hallway and then down the stairs to the other side.. One time I was coming back from class and saw her approaching me from the other end of the hall. I knew I couldn’t make it back into my room without passing her. Now, I really wanted that Jack, so I improvised. I pulled out my phone and faked a conversation as I walked down the hallway. I made sure to sound invested so that when Angelica eventually said ‘Hi’, a simple head nod from me sufficed as a response. The high council allowed this “contact” to slide, as it did not break any bylaws of the bet.
Every so often, Brenda would fill us in about her time spent with Angelica. Not only did the girl drink almost 24/7, but she also had a gross dependence on prescription pills. Angelica would wake up and pretty much stick a straw in a bottle of bur-nasties (Burnett’s vodka) , and down pills like breath mints before going to class.
We made it 3 weeks until shit hit the fan.
One night, around 11:00pm, Angelica came pounding on our door.
“I know you guys are avoiding me! I told the RA’s you smoke pot and are bullying me! I told them about all the drugs and alcohol in your room!”
Great, she was once again ruining another new episode of Hardcore Pawn. We remained silent. I snuck up to the door and looked out the peephole. There she was, standing in front of our door, hollering and pouting, then hollering once again, followed by more pouting. We didn’t know what to make of her threats. Did she actually rat us out or were they just that, threats?
Then she texted Dan, ‘I was on antibiotics and you came inside me.’
He freaked the fuck out. She had assured him that she was on birth control that fateful night, but apparently she was on some kind of antibiotics that could potentially cancel out her semen slayers.
“Fuck this bet,” Dan said. He ripped the door open, but she was gone. He stormed out of the room and down the hall. Rivy and I just looked at each other.
“And then there were two,” he said.
Dan came back a few minutes later. He was pacing around the room, looking up different birth controls and antibiotics on his computer. I had never seen the poor kid so worked up. He certainly was not ready to be a father.
“Why the fuck wouldn’t she tell me she was on antibiotics! She’s fucking crazy!”
“What happened down there?” Rivy asked.
“She’s screaming at Brenda and Ashley (Ashley was their third roommate) about how she doesn’t have any friends. Somehow, it’s everyone else's fault that she’s fucking insane.”
Now, we liked Brenda and Ashley, after thinking about it for a few minutes, we decided that our silly bet wasn’t worth all this stress. We walked down to their room and thought it would be best to talk things out.
Talk was probably not the best word to use. We tried to ‘talk’, but Angelica and Ashley continued to scream and holler at each other. Ashley would tell Angelica how crazy she sounded and Angelica would counter with how everyone is always mean to her and everyone hates her.
I tried to step in simply said, “Look, it’s not that we hate you. We just aren’t destined to be friends. If we can just agree to leave each other alone then we’ll all be better off.” I thought that was a rational argument. I was wrong. My suggestion was met with more screaming and swearing. I could see a group of shadows outside of the door. I looked out the peephole to see our entire hallway gathered outside Angelica’s room. I opened the door and stepped outside.
“What the fuck is going on in there?” our friend Mike asked.
I told him as much as I could. A few people from upstairs had joined to see what all the fuss was about. I’m someone who believes that everyone’s business is their own, and these kids from upstairs didn’t need to know what was going on.
“So who won the bet?” Mike asked. I laughed and said it was off. We’d all be splitting the bottle that weekend.
I went back into the room to find that the argument had gone nowhere. Eventually, Dan, Rivy and I decided that this wasn’t worth our energy. It was 1 in the morning and we all had class the next day. We went back to our rooms and passed out.
The next day, after class, Brenda came knocking on our door. We let her in and made sure Angelica was nowhere in sight. She informed us that after we left, Angelica and Ashley continued to fight. Apparently while we were sleeping, Ashley’s boyfriend ended up driving down from the city and joined in the screaming match. Furniture began to be thrown, death threats made and police called. The boyfriend allegedly put his head through a mirror (because that’s one way to win an argument). Ashley moved out the next day and now, poor Brenda, was left to deal with Angelica, on her own, for the rest of the year.
Our RA came knocking on our door later that night. She said that she was informed of illegal substances in our room and was going to have to search it. I guess Angelica had ratted on us after all. We had thankfully smoked all the weed earlier that night, but our beloved bottle of Jack Daniels (and other booze) was ripped from us before we ever got to crack it open. The RA sat us down and questioned us about the whole situation. We explained to her that Angelica refused to leave us alone (There was obviously never any mention of the ‘bet’) and that she really isn’t a nice person. The RA lectured us about the dangers of bullying and we just had to sit there and pretend like we were the assholes. We were ultimately written up for alcohol possession, had to pay $100 each, were forced to take classes about the dangers of alcohol abuse and had to go in front of a residential board for conduct hearings. Our alcohol safety classes/hearings overlapped with our actual schedules and we ended up missing a handful of important classes because we were “alcoholic bullies”.
TL![[Image: biggrin.gif]](https://rooshvforum.network/images/smilies/biggrin.gif)
R A crazy girl moved into our dorm hallway. We made a bet to see who could go the longest without talking to her. She snaps and winds up ratting us out for weed and alcohol in our dorm room. In consequence, we were written up, paid a fine, had to go to alcohol safety classes, and conduct hearings which made us miss important class time.
NOTE - I'm no Nasa Test Pilot, not my story, I copied it from here
College is that magical place in life where you can “start over.” Wipe the slate clean of all the shameful shit you’ve done up to this point and truly become a new person. ‘Spread your wings and fly’ they said. Talk to anyone and everyone. Rivy, Dan and myself were freshman year roommates, and we did just that.
The dorm hall was a long chain of newfound friends. Some of these people would fizzle out over the next four years, others I’m happy to say I can still call my best friends. We were a tight-knit hallway. Everyone liked everyone and we all got along.
Our room was in the dead center of the hall. We’d leave our door open and extend an invitation to all our hall mates to come and chill. Whether we were smoking pot, playing video games, watching TV or just kicking back, there was never a dull moment or a bad vibe.
Then Angelica moved in…
It was halfway through first semester when a bed opened up in our friend Brenda’s room. Angelica was on a transfer list. Brenda was a one of our closer friends, so we told her to bring Angelica over to hang for a night, as to welcome her into our little community.
Angelica was a zero-fucks-given half Italian half Lebanese girl with a crippling case of the crazies. She talked with a thick New York/Mona-Lisa Vito accent. Ya know, “Fuck you, fuck him, fuck her and fuck anybody that looks like her.”
“Do you smoke weed?” Dan asked.
“Yea,” she responded
“We were gonna go smoke if you wanna thrown down.”
“I ain't got anything.”
This wasn’t a problem at first. We were happy to welcome a ‘new friend’ and didn’t mind smoking her up. We went outside, sat in our favorite smoking spot and rotated a pair of spliffs. Angelica was one of those, ‘Never shuts the fuck up when their high,’ kind of people. I myself occasionally suffer from the same side effect, but we’ve all got our pitfalls.
Granted, everything she said was a little humorous. I’d shut my eyes and picture Marisa Tomei, but if Marisa Tomei had just packed a fresh lip of Copenhagen Wintergreen.
We ended up back in the dorm room, turned on our favorite ‘high’ channel, TruTV , and were happy to find that a new episode of Hardcore Pawn was airing. But oh wait, Angelica wouldn’t stop talking.
“This shit’s all fake. They stage everything. How can you watch this? This is gay. Let’s smoke more. Do you have any booze?”
Yea, I know the show is probably fake. But let me a pretend for a fucking minute, will ya? No, we aren't smoking again, it’s been 5 minutes, and no, you’re not having any of our booze.
The Hardcore Pawn marathon ended. A normal human being would take the hint that everybody crawling into bed and turning the lights off meant the party was over and to kindly get the fuck out. Angelica was not a normal human being. Brenda tried to get her to leave, but she insisted on staying. Rivy and I didn’t know how to handle the situation, so we just rolled over in bed and tried to fall asleep. Dan left the room to shit and brush his teeth and hoped that Angelica would be gone by the time he returned. But oh was he mistaken. Once Dan left the room, Angelica climbed up in his bed. Brenda admitted defeat and left.
Now, Dan and Rivy had bunk beds and Dan had the top bunk. My bed was across the room and elevated over my dresser. It was as if I had top bunk, but there was nobody under me. Basically, I could look to my right and see Dan’s bed.
Dan returned, climbed up to his bunk and laid down next to Angelica. Complete and utter silence ensued for the next twenty minutes. I’ll never forget the conversation Rivy and I texted each other.
‘Are they…’ –Rivy ‘What? – Me ‘Fucking?’ – Rivy ‘Nah, Dan’s got standards.’ – Me
That’s when Angelica hopped down from Dan’s bed and left without saying a word. Dan then hopped down and turned the lights on. The three of us clearly had way too much to say to each other, but Dan, standing in the middle of the room, had the floor.
“I fucked her,” he said with a wide grin.
“What the fuck?” Rivy and I exclaimed.
“Got her to leave, didn’t I?”
“Well, yea… but why?” I asked.
“Dinner was on my plate and I had to eat,” Dan responded. To this day, that is still in my top 5 quotes from college.
Angelica kept coming around. In her mind, we were best friends. I try to give everyone I meet a fair chance, but holy fucking shit was this girl annoying. We decided, okay, one more chance. Some friends of ours were throwing a party one weekend at a house off campus. We thought we’d bring Angelica along in the hopes that she would meet new people and make other friends.
The party was actually pretty fun. I was the only one in the group with a car so I usually ended up being the driver in these situations. I didn’t mind it thought. I was never one that had to be drunk to have fun. The same can’t be said for the others thought. Especially poor Brenda. I’ve never seen her as shit-housed drunk as she was that night. Brenda could usually hold her own, but it got to the point where I became concerned. I gathered the troops and said that the party bus was leaving. Rivy and Dan understood. Angelica though, insisted on staying. She said it was Brenda’s fault for getting too drunk and she wasn’t going to let her ruin the night. Now, she may have been right in the sense that it was Brenda’s fault, but you don’t treat your “friend”/roommate like that. I told her we’d leave her there if she didn’t come now. After a few more minutes of arguing she finally came with us. Poor Brenda was slouched over in the car in complete drunken misery. It was only a ten minute drive back to campus, but to her it must have felt like an eternity. We finally pulled up next to our building and Rivy and Dan helped Brenda out of the car. If you’ve ever tried to lift dead weight, you’d know that it’s not as easy at it sounds. Dan and Rivy ended up dropping Brenda on the ground. Thankfully she didn’t hit her head or anything. As for Angelica? She left and walked back into the building and offered no help with her roommate. We made it back to their room, but Brenda was too drunk to put her security code in. We knocked and knocked. We knew Angelica was in there, but she didn’t answer. Finally, she ripped the door open.
“What! I’m trying to go to bed!”
“Jesus Christ, Angelica, help us get Brenda in her bed!”, Rivy hollered.
“No, she’s going to puke and I can’t sleep if the room smells like vomit!”
“What the fuck is wrong with you?!” we answered back.
The three of us barged past her and put Brenda in her bed. Dan moved a trash bucket next to her and we left.
This was the last straw. No more chances. We didn’t know how to get a person like Angelica out of our lives without repercussions. How do you tell someone you don’t want to be their friend? Especially now-a-days when everyone’s got their safe spaces full of green grass and rainbows?
The three of us all felt the same way about Angelica. The three of us also felt the same way about Jack Daniels. We decided to make things interesting. A bottle of Jack would be awarded to the roommate that could go the longest without speaking to Angelica. The game was on.
We’d go to absurd lengths to avoid this girl. Our friends Mike and Brian lived at the other end of the hallway. In order to not risk Angelica walking out of her room as we passed by, we’d go up a flight of stairs, down the 2nd floor hallway and then down the stairs to the other side.. One time I was coming back from class and saw her approaching me from the other end of the hall. I knew I couldn’t make it back into my room without passing her. Now, I really wanted that Jack, so I improvised. I pulled out my phone and faked a conversation as I walked down the hallway. I made sure to sound invested so that when Angelica eventually said ‘Hi’, a simple head nod from me sufficed as a response. The high council allowed this “contact” to slide, as it did not break any bylaws of the bet.
Every so often, Brenda would fill us in about her time spent with Angelica. Not only did the girl drink almost 24/7, but she also had a gross dependence on prescription pills. Angelica would wake up and pretty much stick a straw in a bottle of bur-nasties (Burnett’s vodka) , and down pills like breath mints before going to class.
We made it 3 weeks until shit hit the fan.
One night, around 11:00pm, Angelica came pounding on our door.
“I know you guys are avoiding me! I told the RA’s you smoke pot and are bullying me! I told them about all the drugs and alcohol in your room!”
Great, she was once again ruining another new episode of Hardcore Pawn. We remained silent. I snuck up to the door and looked out the peephole. There she was, standing in front of our door, hollering and pouting, then hollering once again, followed by more pouting. We didn’t know what to make of her threats. Did she actually rat us out or were they just that, threats?
Then she texted Dan, ‘I was on antibiotics and you came inside me.’
He freaked the fuck out. She had assured him that she was on birth control that fateful night, but apparently she was on some kind of antibiotics that could potentially cancel out her semen slayers.
“Fuck this bet,” Dan said. He ripped the door open, but she was gone. He stormed out of the room and down the hall. Rivy and I just looked at each other.
“And then there were two,” he said.
Dan came back a few minutes later. He was pacing around the room, looking up different birth controls and antibiotics on his computer. I had never seen the poor kid so worked up. He certainly was not ready to be a father.
“Why the fuck wouldn’t she tell me she was on antibiotics! She’s fucking crazy!”
“What happened down there?” Rivy asked.
“She’s screaming at Brenda and Ashley (Ashley was their third roommate) about how she doesn’t have any friends. Somehow, it’s everyone else's fault that she’s fucking insane.”
Now, we liked Brenda and Ashley, after thinking about it for a few minutes, we decided that our silly bet wasn’t worth all this stress. We walked down to their room and thought it would be best to talk things out.
Talk was probably not the best word to use. We tried to ‘talk’, but Angelica and Ashley continued to scream and holler at each other. Ashley would tell Angelica how crazy she sounded and Angelica would counter with how everyone is always mean to her and everyone hates her.
I tried to step in simply said, “Look, it’s not that we hate you. We just aren’t destined to be friends. If we can just agree to leave each other alone then we’ll all be better off.” I thought that was a rational argument. I was wrong. My suggestion was met with more screaming and swearing. I could see a group of shadows outside of the door. I looked out the peephole to see our entire hallway gathered outside Angelica’s room. I opened the door and stepped outside.
“What the fuck is going on in there?” our friend Mike asked.
I told him as much as I could. A few people from upstairs had joined to see what all the fuss was about. I’m someone who believes that everyone’s business is their own, and these kids from upstairs didn’t need to know what was going on.
“So who won the bet?” Mike asked. I laughed and said it was off. We’d all be splitting the bottle that weekend.
I went back into the room to find that the argument had gone nowhere. Eventually, Dan, Rivy and I decided that this wasn’t worth our energy. It was 1 in the morning and we all had class the next day. We went back to our rooms and passed out.
The next day, after class, Brenda came knocking on our door. We let her in and made sure Angelica was nowhere in sight. She informed us that after we left, Angelica and Ashley continued to fight. Apparently while we were sleeping, Ashley’s boyfriend ended up driving down from the city and joined in the screaming match. Furniture began to be thrown, death threats made and police called. The boyfriend allegedly put his head through a mirror (because that’s one way to win an argument). Ashley moved out the next day and now, poor Brenda, was left to deal with Angelica, on her own, for the rest of the year.
Our RA came knocking on our door later that night. She said that she was informed of illegal substances in our room and was going to have to search it. I guess Angelica had ratted on us after all. We had thankfully smoked all the weed earlier that night, but our beloved bottle of Jack Daniels (and other booze) was ripped from us before we ever got to crack it open. The RA sat us down and questioned us about the whole situation. We explained to her that Angelica refused to leave us alone (There was obviously never any mention of the ‘bet’) and that she really isn’t a nice person. The RA lectured us about the dangers of bullying and we just had to sit there and pretend like we were the assholes. We were ultimately written up for alcohol possession, had to pay $100 each, were forced to take classes about the dangers of alcohol abuse and had to go in front of a residential board for conduct hearings. Our alcohol safety classes/hearings overlapped with our actual schedules and we ended up missing a handful of important classes because we were “alcoholic bullies”.
TL
R A crazy girl moved into our dorm hallway. We made a bet to see who could go the longest without talking to her. She snaps and winds up ratting us out for weed and alcohol in our dorm room. In consequence, we were written up, paid a fine, had to go to alcohol safety classes, and conduct hearings which made us miss important class time.NOTE - I'm no Nasa Test Pilot, not my story, I copied it from here