[Julio]

Hi fellas,
I'm writing this post to share with you smthing that's happening to me.
I've been dating a lot of girls during the last months and I never felt anything for any of the girls I knew, just sympathy.

Last saturday, I met this girl in a party we organized in my house... Fck when I saw her my heart just collapsed during a few seconds, she is easily a 9.5... Perfect body, blue eyes, tall, beautiful and... french
We talked for a while everything was fine cuz I was drunkish and I didn't pay much attention to her beauty.

On sunday morning, I got up and saw she added me as a friend on FaceBook. She didn't even know my last name so I took this as a IOI. Then we started exchange messages via FB and she asked me to go out with her...another big IOI. We spent the afternoon together, walking in the park and talking. She gave me some IOIs but when things got interesting she told me she had to go back home. She sent me another mess on FB on sunday night telling me she had passed a very good day with me and shit like that.
Well from here, I started to feel smthing weird, she is obvisouly extremely beautiful, very interesting to talk to. I couldn't do anything else than thinking about her. I thought about her every 2 minutes it was absolutely awful. I mean I don't want to have any strings attached with any girls for now and that's what I thought until then. After spending a fcking afternoon with a girl I don't even know well, I had won a no coming back trip into the AFC land !!!
On monday she told me her bro is coming in town and that she was going to pass a good time with him. No news on thursday and I started feeling sad. She sent me finally a message yesterday but a brief one compared to her former messages.
I have the impression I'm in College and it's my first love. I hate being so weak for a girl and I hate myself for that. Thing is, if I act like an AFC I will loose any chance to get this girl but on the other side I have problems to clear my mind...

Today I feel better because I realized I've been really dumb. I don't really mind what's going to happen with her in the future but I just want to improve and not feel the same way next time I meet a perfect girl like that. I should always stay alpha in every occasion.

Regarding the outcome of this story, I don't understand well why she sends me big IOIs on sunday and since then she flaked like I did smthing wrong.

Any advice on this topic?
Tks !

[twigman]

Can I say generally when girls make the 1st moves they are more likely to flake out later.

I don't know why, but its like you're there and she took you, and now there's no game for her, she got her validation.

[twigman]

Can I say generally when girls make the 1st moves they are more likely to flake out later.

I don't know why, but its like you're there and she took you, and now there's no game for her, she got her validation.

[Julio]

(03-05-2009 08:07 AM)twigman Wrote:  

Can I say generally when girls make the 1st moves they are more likely to flake out later.

I don't know why, but its like you're there and she took you, and now there's no game for her, she got her validation.

Thanks Twigman, that's true but during our only rendez-vous I used a lot of Negs, much more than I do usually and I haven't given her any validation. On the contrary I told her how beautiful and natural our best friend was and how it must be difficult for her to go out with such a beauty...and stuffs like that...
I don't think I did bad with her but I did bad in my mind for starting thinking so much about her...
I don't want to feel like that each time I meet a HB > 9

[Trotter]

Sounds like her game is tight.

[Oblivion77]

(03-05-2009 12:02 PM)Trotter Wrote:  

Sounds like her game is tight.

We need some data here.
Time to develop a good strategy.

How old is she?
Which city are you in?

[Julio]

(03-05-2009 02:52 PM)Oblivion77 Wrote:  

(03-05-2009 12:02 PM)Trotter Wrote:  

Sounds like her game is tight.

We need some data here.
Time to develop a good strategy.

How old is she?
Which city are you in?

She's almost 23 (quite young) I'm 26 we are in Madrid
Just for info I sent her a sms yesterday inviting her to a party we organized home and she hasn't answered back so I think it's over and I think it's a loss of time...

Did smthing like that happen to you? Like you loose all your game when u met a "One Itis"... How can you solve that?

[Oblivion77]

(03-05-2009 03:51 PM)julio26 Wrote:  

(03-05-2009 02:52 PM)Oblivion77 Wrote:  

(03-05-2009 12:02 PM)Trotter Wrote:  

Sounds like her game is tight.

We need some data here.
Time to develop a good strategy.

How old is she?
Which city are you in?

She's almost 23 (quite young) I'm 26 we are in Madrid
Just for info I sent her a sms yesterday inviting her to a party we organized home and she hasn't answered back so I think it's over and I think it's a loss of time...

Did smthing like that happen to you? Like you loose all your game when u met a "One Itis"... How can you solve that?

Wait a bit.
Go out and get busy with your life.
Then re-evaluate the situation.
Dont overthink.

Maybe in a while you can call again, with non chalance, as if nothing happened and you didnt feel she ignored you.
Invite her out for a canja (sp?) and some jamon serrano.

I didnt have a similar experience but I have the impression that right now you arent too lucid. You sound too much involved, ergo not objective.
And usually that's a bad state of mind to plan your next move.

The bottom line is: you need to get game to make it work, but also dont over stress about it.
Just live your life.

A tidbit of wisdom I learned in all my experiences: when something works with a girl, it is smooth and easy since the beginning.
When complications arise at such early stages, I learnt that things rarely go anywhere.
Hopefully I dont sound cynical but seriously, when a girl is fun and open things evolve smoothly.


Of course, having game means you manage to maximize what you can get out of difficult situations but, as I said, dont overthink.

It is a gift to be able to let things go when everything is way too problematic.
You shouldnt be trying hard to "fix" this situation.

A major effort is something you should save for when there is an important relationship at stage, like with a girlfriend you have been with for a long time.

Dont act beta and you will be ok, no matter what's the outcome.
No matter the shit she brings to the table, you always have Real or Atletico on Sunday! ;-)

[Oblivion77]

(03-05-2009 06:52 PM)Oblivion77 Wrote:  

(03-05-2009 03:51 PM)julio26 Wrote:  

(03-05-2009 02:52 PM)Oblivion77 Wrote:  

(03-05-2009 12:02 PM)Trotter Wrote:  

Sounds like her game is tight.

We need some data here.
Time to develop a good strategy.

How old is she?
Which city are you in?

She's almost 23 (quite young) I'm 26 we are in Madrid
Just for info I sent her a sms yesterday inviting her to a party we organized home and she hasn't answered back so I think it's over and I think it's a loss of time...

Did smthing like that happen to you? Like you loose all your game when u met a "One Itis"... How can you solve that?

Wait a bit.
Go out and get busy with your life.
Then re-evaluate the situation.
Dont overthink.

Maybe in a while you can call again, with non chalance, as if nothing happened and you didnt feel she ignored you.
Invite her out for a canja (sp?) and some jamon serrano.

I didnt have a similar experience but I have the impression that right now you arent too lucid. You sound too much involved, ergo not objective.
And usually that's a bad state of mind to plan your next move.

The bottom line is: you need to get game to make it work, but also dont over stress about it.
Just live your life.

A tidbit of wisdom I learned in all my experiences: when something works with a girl, it is smooth and easy since the beginning.
When complications arise at such early stages, I learnt that things rarely go anywhere.
Hopefully I dont sound cynical but seriously, when a girl is fun and open things evolve smoothly.


Of course, having game means you manage to maximize what you can get out of difficult situations but, as I said, dont overthink.

It is a gift to be able to let things go when everything is way too problematic.
You shouldnt be trying hard to "fix" this situation.

A major effort is something you should save for when there is an important relationship at stage, like with a girlfriend you have been with for a long time.

Dont act beta and you will be ok, no matter what's the outcome.
No matter the shit she brings to the table, you always have Real or Atletico on Sunday! ;-)

I forgot to answer about the IoI's she gave you.
That's easy to explain.
She probably thought you are either funny or attractive, but isnt sure about what she wants.
23 years old? she is young man, she isnt assertive enough to know what she is doing. She isnt a woman, just a girl in a foreign country, ergo her behavior is erratic.
You aint crazy for not being able to understand it!

The secret is to not try to understand her behavior, not at all.
Dont focus on that, dont try to dissect what she does, or you will loose your sanity.

Being so hot she probably is used to get many guys going after her.
And often 9+ really crave attention, especially if she is confident enough to "exploit" her beauty, charming random guys.

In the US they are brutally called "attention whores".
Believe it or not there are quite a few around, lol, especially in Los Angeles.

As I said, stay alpha, re-assess the situation when you are in control of yourself.
And of course, have fun with what you do, make fun of yourself as well.
Keep it light.

[InternationPlayboy]

(03-05-2009 08:06 AM)twigman Wrote:  

Can I say generally when girls make the 1st moves they are more likely to flake out later.

I don't know why, but its like you're there and she took you, and now there's no game for her, she got her validation.

That does actually seem true. Some super sexy Argentine girl approached me and we exchanged e mails a couple of weeks ago. She ended up being a flake. Now I've seen the chick in the club twice when I was dancing with 2 cute chicks and she is always giving me dirty looks. Dumb kunt shouldn't have plaid the flake especially after approaching me.

[Julio]

Thanks for the Advice guys and thanks Oblivion it looks like you know a little bit of Spain
You were right I lost lucidity during a few days but I feel much better now. i'll keep you in touch with the outcome of this story soon. Thanks

[Julio]

Some feedback on this story.
The girl called me last week and wanted to go in a club with her. She told me she would be with a Colombian "prince". I told her I was not going to disturb her and wished her good luck with the guy. She then answered I really needed to go because she wanted to see me and that the guy was just a friend... So I went there with some friends and did a good game. I started dancing with one of my friend, a HB 8.5 and she was quite jealous :"I don't want to disturb you" she said. Then she told me she was very pleased to see me and that she wanted to spend some time with me alone (IOI) nevertheless she had to stay with this guy because this AFC bought her and her friends a bottle and booked a table. She invited me and my friends at her table and we started to talk. I told her to go slow since I didn't want to engage myself with a girl like that, that she wasn't for me at all. She said I had to know her well and that she is looking for a more serious relationship. I told her I wasn't the guy she was looking for and that I didn't want to loose my time with her since she seems really unstable. Her answer was: "You have to try" (other big IOI). She then told me she couldn't get to close to me due to this Colombian guy as she didn't want to make him jealous. The guy is really into her and paid for a bottle so she couldn't make out with me in front of him. But she asked me to book a night next week in order to take her to a place where we could be alone and "no one could disturb us".
Well, I think you all understand this was a big IOI, it's difficult to do better. I just had to wait a few days more and it would be done.

After that episode, last friday I went back to my house in the South of France and she went to Paris as she had an interview. She was supposed to go back on tuesday night.
She sent me a poke on Facebook, a message and etc...

I was quite excited to see her again as u can imagine but I never tell her about that nor showed her my excitment.

Last wednesday I called her, asked her about her long week end if she had any plan for the night. She was completely different with me on the phone, told me she had a lot of work to do... Finally told me she would be happy to go out but wanted to invite some friends... While we were supposed to meet alone...
She arrived at the bar with 4 friends, 2 boys 2 girls and I was with my roomate. This was maybe the worst date ever, I was unable to do a thing since we were sitted on a table and she was talking with her friends. I almost didn't talk to her. Finally we all went home after a while. During the conversation she gave me IOD like
"How was your week end?"
"Well good as I told you I was in France"
"oh that's true I totally forgot" ....

Or she saw passing a guy and said he was kinda cute...

Anyways, I tried stay relax, I punished her with my body language and some negs and talked to other girls like I didn't giive a fck about her.
When we said goodbye she didn't tell me anything special except:
"I'm sorry i forgot your Jersey (she kept it the other night in the club) but at least it gives me a reason to see you again"


That's it, I think this girl is quite crazy and that she is playing with me. I mean you can't tell these craps on thursday night and 4 days later completely flake...
So for the moment I don't want to think about her anymore even though she is a real hottie. I want to find quickly another target so that I will completely forget about her

[Oblivion77]

(03-13-2009 05:00 AM)julio26 Wrote:  

Some feedback on this story.
The girl called me last week and wanted to go in a club with her. She told me she would be with a Colombian "prince". I told her I was not going to disturb her and wished her good luck with the guy. She then answered I really needed to go because she wanted to see me and that the guy was just a friend... So I went there with some friends and did a good game. I started dancing with one of my friend, a HB 8.5 and she was quite jealous :"I don't want to disturb you" she said. Then she told me she was very pleased to see me and that she wanted to spend some time with me alone (IOI) nevertheless she had to stay with this guy because this AFC bought her and her friends a bottle and booked a table. She invited me and my friends at her table and we started to talk. I told her to go slow since I didn't want to engage myself with a girl like that, that she wasn't for me at all. She said I had to know her well and that she is looking for a more serious relationship. I told her I wasn't the guy she was looking for and that I didn't want to loose my time with her since she seems really unstable. Her answer was: "You have to try" (other big IOI). She then told me she couldn't get to close to me due to this Colombian guy as she didn't want to make him jealous. The guy is really into her and paid for a bottle so she couldn't make out with me in front of him. But she asked me to book a night next week in order to take her to a place where we could be alone and "no one could disturb us".
Well, I think you all understand this was a big IOI, it's difficult to do better. I just had to wait a few days more and it would be done.

After that episode, last friday I went back to my house in the South of France and she went to Paris as she had an interview. She was supposed to go back on tuesday night.
She sent me a poke on Facebook, a message and etc...

I was quite excited to see her again as u can imagine but I never tell her about that nor showed her my excitment.

Last wednesday I called her, asked her about her long week end if she had any plan for the night. She was completely different with me on the phone, told me she had a lot of work to do... Finally told me she would be happy to go out but wanted to invite some friends... While we were supposed to meet alone...
She arrived at the bar with 4 friends, 2 boys 2 girls and I was with my roomate. This was maybe the worst date ever, I was unable to do a thing since we were sitted on a table and she was talking with her friends. I almost didn't talk to her. Finally we all went home after a while. During the conversation she gave me IOD like
"How was your week end?"
"Well good as I told you I was in France"
"oh that's true I totally forgot" ....

Or she saw passing a guy and said he was kinda cute...

Anyways, I tried stay relax, I punished her with my body language and some negs and talked to other girls like I didn't giive a fck about her.
When we said goodbye she didn't tell me anything special except:
"I'm sorry i forgot your Jersey (she kept it the other night in the club) but at least it gives me a reason to see you again"


That's it, I think this girl is quite crazy and that she is playing with me. I mean you can't tell these craps on thursday night and 4 days later completely flake...
So for the moment I don't want to think about her anymore even though she is a real hottie. I want to find quickly another target so that I will completely forget about her

Glad to hear about your update.
It seems you handled her well.
Bravo.

She is what in italian we call "Rizza Cazzi" ("A Tease", but way more vulgar, lol).

It is evident she craves attention but is just an headache.
Move on and get a new target is a wise thing to do.

And if for whatever reason you ever hang out with her again, you either:

1) Flirt with another girl...and actually go really for her.

2) Try to make a move, and if she makes it difficult for you (bringing friends, mentioning "colombian princes" etc, just go back to plan. Get another girl, then move on.

Remember, the moment you decide to "downgrade" her to friend, she will sense she has no power over you anymore.