[Ski pro]

I just got back from a weekend in the south of France to meet up with an old friend from abroad who I haven't seen in years, since he got got married and I was his best man.

My friend used to play sport at a very high level, semi professional and above and married a reasonably hot Australian girl. Not slutty, homely, with family values and reasonably not crazy.

Many years have passed and what I saw disappointed me so much. He was fat and a sad shadow of his former self. He is still married to the same girl and to be fair to her, she hasn't aged at all, still in really decent shape after 2 kids, he earns decent money in a corporate job and they live in a nice house.

By fat I mean seriously overweight and struggling to push the pram for his children up the hills of this charming little French village. Out of breath and sweating. We went canoeing down a river with the dog and he was seriously struggling to keep up a steady paddling rhythm.

I managed to get him away from his wife and 2 kids for a while and he complained about the usual married man stuff, saying things like the 'as soon as the wedding ring goes on, that's sex blocker number 1, kids are sex blocker number 2'. Clearly the guy isn't getting laid at home and to be fair to her, I can see her point.

Also complaints about the usual corporate life, a lot of moaning about everything in general and not a lot of positive things to say.

It was very very interesting to watch the dynamic between the two of them. Upon seeing me (I'm in reasonable shape and I don't drink anymore which I guess keeps me looking fresh), his wife was constantly saying stuff to him about how he shouldn't eat so much, needed to exercise, drank too much etc etc. She was also asking me for nutrition advice for him in front of him :/

I suppose one could call this beta behaviour but I'm of the opinion that when women say this kind of stuff, it's a very clear (and when women resort to verbal, last resort) signal of what it is that they want. In this case, she wants the man she married back and a guy who is prepared to look after himself, get his shit in order and lead.

I had other reservations about how he was bringing his kids up but I realise that that is not my place to judge and everyone has their own style.

Anyway, I post this as a warning to newbies or those confused blue pill lurkers on here.

1. Get your shit together, learn game and understand it.
2. Put yourself at the centre of your own world
3. Keep your shit together and don't let it be compromised.
4. Lead your woman and your family
5. Know that the game never stops.

This may seem like a bit of a confused ramble but I had to get it out. I'm just so disappointed in my old friend. I hope he turns it around.

SP

[Uzisuicide]

Good post. Never get to comfortable in your marriage or LTR. As men, many times our woman tends to 'dissapear' when we get too comfortable. We have to take care of our own shit as we expect our woman to do. No woman will stay with a man after she losses respect for him. OP is correct. Game never stops. Ski pro, your friend is headed for hard times...

Uzi

[pialox]

(08-08-2016 02:34 PM)Ski pro Wrote:  

.........a reasonably hot Australian girl. Not slutty, homely, with family values and reasonably not crazy.

[Aurini]

Indeed. You know that saying about how foreign brides turn into western whores when they move to America? I wonder how much of that has to do with their husbands being pathetic, disappointing simps, who drive them to it.

[chicane]

(08-09-2016 01:04 PM)Aurini Wrote:  

Indeed. You know that saying about how foreign brides turn into western whores when they move to America? I wonder how much of that has to do with their husbands being pathetic, disappointing simps, who drive them to it.

Some of the time. For me, if I want to marry someone young enough to have children, I can't live in America. The social pressures on a woman that much younger than me would destroy the marriage. In other words, the harpies would be so angry and outraged that they would start all sorts psychodrama to destroy my marriage.

Don't blame guys for not being George Clooney. Even he wasn't able to stay married.

[Serious Sam]

Complacency is a killer. The road to self improvement never ends.

One thing I've noticed about guys like this is that they feel like they missed out on something grand earlier in life. They bought into the message that their glory days were in high school and college (or in the case of your friend, his semi-pro career) and are long behind them. Their lives then revolve around a soulless job, their wife, and their babies. These men neglect themselves, becoming so lost within this false paradigm that they simply give up and become lazy slobs. Giving these guys a little push, or opening a window of opportunity can awaken them from their haze (for example, getting them involved in an organized sport, helping them recognize their passions, and if possible, monetize them). Sometimes a little encouragement mixed with a bit of shame for becoming a fat fuck is all they need to wake up. Sometimes they're too far gone, and nothing you do can help them. In that case, you may as well hold a personal memorial service since he is pretty much dead.

[Kid Twist]

(08-09-2016 01:33 PM)Serious Sam Wrote:  

Sometimes a little encouragement mixed with a bit of shame for becoming a fat fuck is all they need to wake up. Sometimes they're too far gone, and nothing you do can help them. In that case, you may as well hold a personal memorial service since he is pretty much dead.

Fat fuck is one of my favorite lines. I really enjoyed your post, and gotta say, laughed out loud when I read "personal memorial service", unreal.