[jackkincaid]

Could use some advice on gaming a nice girl.

I conclude she's nice because:

- Only ever had one serious BF and doesn't seem like the promiscuous type
- Laughs at sexual humor, but never instigates it
- Not a social media/attention whore; has a Facebook account but it's almost never updated, literally has like 20 posts for the year
- Gives off the nerdy librarian vibe; she comes off smart, articulate, and her job is a writer
- I saw a total beta take a shot at her and she was gentle, polite, let him down very easy; after he was out of earshot she murmured something sympathetic to her friends

She is an 8 for sure, feminine looks, knows how to dress but doesn't wear a ton of makeup.

We actually met in a Meetup for wine drinkers. In our previous interactions, I was about to hit on her when my buddy introduced another girl to me in a perfect if accidental cock block. The other girl was cute so we got talking and I eventually took her out on a date. It went well but she was standoffish when I went for a kiss so I shrugged and proceeded to delete her number.

Then I met the nice girl again at a party for New Years and had a good time with her; there some pretty natural kino on my part, adjusting her new year's hat, touching her wrist to demonstrate racquet holds, touching her waist for emphasis, etc. Funnily enough the other girl was at the same party and spent much of it pouting as she watched the nice girl get all my attention.

Anyway we were extremely drunk so I don't recall much after leaving. I did not want to push too far because a.) it was a house party hosted by a girl I do not know well so I couldn't try to sneak her into a room or anything, b.) it's a Meetup so I don't want to get a reputation of being "that guy" and c.) she really does not seem like the sort of girl who gets physical early. Sure she might if I play it right, but my gut says nobody has ever successfully gotten into her pants without several dates, and anyway she's probably only fucked one or two guys. She's 25; I am 29.

When I woke up hung over in the morning, I saw in my phone that I had gotten her number. I honestly can't recall asking her for it but obviously I had.

Any advice on gaming a girl like her? All the usual game advice seems to assume the target is a girl who's hot but kinda dumb, aka the classic "club" girl or party girl, who will fuck anybody right away if properly gamed.

I see this girl as LTR material and while I know fucking her early is required for a good relationship, it seems to me the escalation needs to be very smooth or she'll easily find a reason to feel I came on too strong.

[sandman972]

Without getting into detail, if she denied you the make out on the first date, is she really worth pursuing? Do you really want to wait until the 8th date to finally get mediocre sex?

I think you should have gone for it on New Years, or at least the kiss. Plus you had the "perfect moment" on New Years eve, and you both were drunk, although you cock blocked yourself by getting too shitty.

You should game her as normal. Shes an 8, she gets hit on dont worry. She isnt that innocent, Im sure shes shut down enough guys in her life.

That being said, if you are still going after it, set up a second date. If she denies you the kiss, communicate with her more on an emotional level(only because of the good girl description you gave) " Listen when I feel something I feel it, and I act on it......but maybe you aren't ready for this kind of thing. I think I should get going now". Then actually get up and leave. This is followed with radio silence until she contacts you. You want her to feel bad about the situation.

Either way, if she denies you the kiss the second date, delete and move on, shes definitely not worth your time and effort.

If she goes with the make out, try and get her back to your place for some wine.

[jackkincaid]

(01-02-2015 01:39 PM)sandman972 Wrote:  

Without getting into detail, if she denied you the make out on the first date, is she really worth pursuing? Do you really want to wait until the 8th date to finally get mediocre sex?

I think you should have gone for it on New Years, or at least the kiss. Plus you had the "perfect moment" on New Years eve, and you both were drunk, although you cock blocked yourself by getting too shitty.

You should game her as normal. Shes an 8, she gets hit on dont worry. She isnt that innocent, Im sure shes shut down enough guys in her life.

That being said, if you are still going after it, set up a second date. If she denies you the kiss, communicate with her more on an emotional level(only because of the good girl description you gave) " Listen when I feel something I feel it, and I act on it......but maybe you aren't ready for this kind of thing. I think I should get going now". Then actually get up and leave. This is followed with radio silence until she contacts you. You want her to feel bad about the situation.

Either way, if she denies you the kiss the second date, delete and move on, shes definitely not worth your time and effort.

If she goes with the make out, try and get her back to your place for some wine.

Oh I think you misunderstood. The nice girl and I did not go on a date. There was a 2nd girl whose number I got, we went out, she denied the kiss, I deleted her number, and she just happened to also be at the same party as the nice girl.

The nice girl, we've hung out in a social (Meetup) situation a few times, only on New Years did I make any moves on her, and she gave me her number.

I am going to text her later today and suggest a bar date.

She definitely gets hit on, tonight there is a Meetup and as soon as she changed her RSVP to say she wasn't going, 5 dudes dropped out as well. I was the only to say I WAS going after she dropped out. So I figure I'll play the hot-cold game while she ponders the date request, and go from there.

[sandman972]

Ah ok my bad. In that case game her as normal. Follow Tuthmosis's first date advice to the T.

[Rawmeo]

Take her out on a date, proceed as usual.

For the girl who denied kissing, good job on deleting the number. That's the summum of disrespect; if she can't kiss you (it takes 3 seconds), she clearly doesn't give a fuck about life.

You are gaming a girl for a LTR by what I understand; escalate as soon as possible, and go for it. The main reason why friendzoned men complain when the girl finds a "lower" man, is because the friendzonee failed to escalate when it was time.

[rudebwoy]

Stop calling her a nice girl for starters, comes across like you are putting her on a pedestal.

Treat her like any other girl, women are women.

[jackkincaid]

(01-02-2015 02:10 PM)rudebwoy Wrote:  

Stop calling her a nice girl for starters, comes across like you are putting her on a pedestal.

Treat her like any other girl, women are women.

I think women are similar but it seems to me there are exceptions to every rule. Some guys have a philosophy that 95% of pickups don't close, so you need a large sample size, so then any single girl doesn't matter, it isn't worth the effort to make adjustments for her personality.

I get that but I don't mind trying to analyze more closely if I have a prospect I like better than the others. She is not the hottest girl I have tried to pick up, but personality wise she is by far the most chill and non-bitchy.

[Dalaran1991]

(01-02-2015 04:16 PM)jackkincaid Wrote:  

I think women are similar but it seems to me there are exceptions to every rule.

And you are pedestalizing her.

The moment you start thinking "this girl is special/an exception" is the moment bad game floods out like a tsunami

[AneroidOcean]

(01-02-2015 12:49 PM)jackkincaid Wrote:  

Could use some advice on gaming a nice girl.

I conclude she's nice because:

- Only ever had one serious BF and doesn't seem like the promiscuous type
- Laughs at sexual humor, but never instigates it
- Not a social media/attention whore; has a Facebook account but it's almost never updated, literally has like 20 posts for the year
- Gives off the nerdy librarian vibe; she comes off smart, articulate, and her job is a writer
- I saw a total beta take a shot at her and she was gentle, polite, let him down very easy; after he was out of earshot she murmured something sympathetic to her friends

She is an 8 for sure, feminine looks, knows how to dress but doesn't wear a ton of makeup.

Sounds okay so far, but you are pedestalizing hard because you don't know her well enough to state all those for a fact.

(01-02-2015 12:49 PM)jackkincaid Wrote:  

We actually met in a Meetup for wine drinkers. In our previous interactions, I was about to hit on her when my buddy introduced another girl to me in a perfect if accidental cock block. The other girl was cute so we got talking and I eventually took her out on a date. It went well but she was standoffish when I went for a kiss so I shrugged and proceeded to delete her number.

Then I met the nice girl again at a party for New Years and had a good time with her; there some pretty natural kino on my part, adjusting her new year's hat, touching her wrist to demonstrate racquet holds, touching her waist for emphasis, etc. Funnily enough the other girl was at the same party and spent much of it pouting as she watched the nice girl get all my attention.

Anyway we were extremely drunk so I don't recall much after leaving. I did not want to push too far because a.) it was a house party hosted by a girl I do not know well so I couldn't try to sneak her into a room or anything, b.) it's a Meetup so I don't want to get a reputation of being "that guy" and c.) she really does not seem like the sort of girl who gets physical early. Sure she might if I play it right, but my gut says nobody has ever successfully gotten into her pants without several dates, and anyway she's probably only fucked one or two guys. She's 25; I am 29.

You were flirting with her and you didn't angle for a NYE kiss? WTF?

(01-02-2015 12:49 PM)jackkincaid Wrote:  

When I woke up hung over in the morning, I saw in my phone that I had gotten her number. I honestly can't recall asking her for it but obviously I had.

Get her on a date, get some drinks in her, escalate. If you're not making out with her by the end of the date, move on.

(01-02-2015 12:49 PM)jackkincaid Wrote:  

Any advice on gaming a girl like her? All the usual game advice seems to assume the target is a girl who's hot but kinda dumb, aka the classic "club" girl or party girl, who will fuck anybody right away if properly gamed.

I see this girl as LTR material and while I know fucking her early is required for a good relationship, it seems to me the escalation needs to be very smooth or she'll easily find a reason to feel I came on too strong.

This sounds like complete troll posting. At least you posted in the newbie forum so judgement can be reserved.

Summary: You may have a small chance but probably blew it.

[Agreddor]

You're letting her "niceness" cloud your judgment.

A girl is still a girl at the end of the day regardless of how nice they are. Stop looking at her view rose tinted glasses.

[RURALGAMER]

Call me super skeptical but in this day and age a woman with very little facebook activity keeps her activity low so that all the guys she is fucking are none the wiser

[Katdogbirdduck]

Nice girl, a really nice girl, is there really such a thing on this planet?
They would either have bitch shields or be lying to you upfront.

[polymath]

If you take this perspective to begin with, you will end up trying to be a "nice" guy to complement her nice personality, and she will probably not be attracted to that.

I'm guessing she has met other men at wine meetups, and if she let a guy down easy, then she probably has rejected guys enough times that she has figured out how to do it gracefully.

PS personally I think if you go for a kiss and the girl is standoffish, you should linger a bit and see if she warms up. Something about being close to another person makes people feel comfortable...plus, tension is sexy. More importantly, if you hang out after a rejected kiss, it makes you look like you aren't shaken by a little bit of rejection.

[viajero]

(01-02-2015 12:49 PM)jackkincaid Wrote:  

Could use some advice on gaming a nice girl.

I conclude she's nice because:

- Only ever had one serious BF and doesn't seem like the promiscuous type
- Laughs at sexual humor, but never instigates it
- Not a social media/attention whore; has a Facebook account but it's almost never updated, literally has like 20 posts for the year
- Gives off the nerdy librarian vibe; she comes off smart, articulate, and her job is a writer
- I saw a total beta take a shot at her and she was gentle, polite, let him down very easy; after he was out of earshot she murmured something sympathetic to her friends

She is an 8 for sure, feminine looks, knows how to dress but doesn't wear a ton of makeup.

We actually met in a Meetup for wine drinkers. In our previous interactions, I was about to hit on her when my buddy introduced another girl to me in a perfect if accidental cock block. The other girl was cute so we got talking and I eventually took her out on a date. It went well but she was standoffish when I went for a kiss so I shrugged and proceeded to delete her number.

Then I met the nice girl again at a party for New Years and had a good time with her; there some pretty natural kino on my part, adjusting her new year's hat, touching her wrist to demonstrate racquet holds, touching her waist for emphasis, etc. Funnily enough the other girl was at the same party and spent much of it pouting as she watched the nice girl get all my attention.

Anyway we were extremely drunk so I don't recall much after leaving. I did not want to push too far because a.) it was a house party hosted by a girl I do not know well so I couldn't try to sneak her into a room or anything, b.) it's a Meetup so I don't want to get a reputation of being "that guy" and c.) she really does not seem like the sort of girl who gets physical early. Sure she might if I play it right, but my gut says nobody has ever successfully gotten into her pants without several dates, and anyway she's probably only fucked one or two guys. She's 25; I am 29.

When I woke up hung over in the morning, I saw in my phone that I had gotten her number. I honestly can't recall asking her for it but obviously I had.

Any advice on gaming a girl like her? All the usual game advice seems to assume the target is a girl who's hot but kinda dumb, aka the classic "club" girl or party girl, who will fuck anybody right away if properly gamed.

I see this girl as LTR material and while I know fucking her early is required for a good relationship, it seems to me the escalation needs to be very smooth or she'll easily find a reason to feel I came on too strong.

I don't change my game with nice girls for a few reason:

1. I don't think a girl who's attracted to you will ever fault you for appropriate levels of physical escalation. She might make you wait, but she'll hang around. If a girl blows you off because you went for a kiss, it wasn't because you escalated too fast, it was because she wasn't that into you.

2. Nice girls want guys who push their buttons just like all girls do. Why avoid doing the things that make you attractive to women?

If I ran big time asshole game I would definitely tone down the asshole a bit, but I don't, so I don't change a thing.

[Feo]

If I were you, I would act super aloof around her in the meetup. After a week or two of that I'd throw an event at my place and invite her and keep her around until everyone else leaves (is she even worth that kind of effort?).

I used to always forget that nice girls like the roller-coaster too. I wouldn't worry about scaring her off

[Katdogbirdduck]

I'd say a guy has to be just himself in the end.
It shouldn't be us, Men, who must acclimatize or adopt to women.
It's them,the women, must work hard to earn the good guy, not the other way around.
So the girl being nice I think doesn't at all have to mean that she's attracted to you or something.
Girls try to convey all sorts of mixed up feelings all the time, so it could baffle or delude you if you take a first impression too seriously.

[Phoenix]

I'll confirm that you always push. Same amount, every time. Equally applicable to sluts and virgins, equally applicable to hotties and plain girls, from experience.