[jariel]

Some of you guys may be familiar with my Real Talk Sessions series, I'm kind of approaching this as one of those posts, but I'm not trying to commandeer the board like that, so I'll just lay out my thoughts here in just another post.

We have a lot of experienced guys here when it comes to the gym, so I'm sure they will add their thoughts, as this message is more directed towards the gym newbies.

1. If you're prepared to get your body and your overall health in order, accept the fact that the gym is a lifestyle change. The gym is not some place you go to because it's the new year; it's not a place you go to for a month or two before your wedding; it's not a place you go to for the sake of meeting women.

The gym is a place you go to because it is a place that you are planning on integrating into your life going forward.

I'm not going to tell you to go X times a week, but I will say that you need to bank on going consistently. Consistently means you adopt a routine, and you stick with your routine, ride or die.

Personally, I'm "at the gym" six days a week. I put that in quotes because I don't always work out at the gym. Sometimes I get in work at a park, I box, I meet up with a friend at a track and get in some work there; bottom line, I'm active six days a week.

2. If that idea is not daunting to you, and you believe you're ready for this, then great. Start off slow. You don't have to immediately be on some six days a week, ride or die shit. You can start off at a decent pace and build on to that as you get more comfortable. If you're putting in work, you'll find very quickly that you will become addicted to this lifestyle.

3. Look at yourself as an athlete. Just because you're not getting paid, and Nike isn't giving you a lifetime contract to put your name on products, doesn't mean you're not an athlete. Even the best athletes have coaches. In the beginning, it won't hurt you to find an affordable trainer, or an experienced friend who you can work out with. Whoever you work with should be able to show you the ropes, get you on a routine, and show you how to lift with proper form. I would rather you get a trainer because the trainer is going to be very business about the shit. For them it is work and they are being paid. You will be more motivated because you will feel the accountability when someone else is showing up at the gym just so they can help you. It's a lot easier to just say, "Fuck it, I'm not going today, I'm still sore", when you don't have anyone to be accountable to.

4. Get your nutrition game on point. You're not going to be able to eat bullshit and look great. That's just reality. Don't bother talking about "the guys on steroids do it", that's not you, so there's no reason for us to go there. The nutrition game gets glossed over because people think muscles, abs, etc. get made in the gym, they don't, they get made in the kitchen.

5. Don't over-read bro-science. There are a million different sites out there, and if you read even half of them, you will find yourself confused. One guy says eat this, one guy says eat that, one guy has this method, one guy has that method. Find something that you feel will work for you, and try it out and see if it actually does. Keep track of what you lift. Keep track of what you eat. Give it time to bear fruit. If it's not working out how you'd like it to, then you can make adjustments. Brandon Carter says, "What gets measured, gets managed." That's real talk. At the end of the day, there's a lot of tried and true information that is readily available for you to take in, I'd ride with that and go from there.

6. Leave your ego at the door. The gym is just like gaming women, you have to leave your ego at the door. You're not going to be the strongest guy there, have the best body, etc. There's always going to be someone stronger, better-looking, whatever else than you are. The gym will humble you, so allow yourself to be humbled.

Ultimately, the only person you're competing with is yourself -- again, it's just like gaming women. Remember you are there for yourself. You're not there for the bodybuilding-looking dudes, you're not there for the chicks who only do squats. No one is paying attention to what you're lifting, they don't give a fuck. Get into your zone, and get your work in. If you're worried about what someone else is doing or what someone else thinks, then you've already lost because you've allowed yourself to forget that the reason you are there is for yourself, and you're letting the bullshit in your head keep you from doing what you need to do to better yourself.

7. Only date women who work out, but don't bring your girlfriend to the gym. Here's a fact that most women don't want to hear. Women who don't take care of themselves, and part of that means keeping up a regular workout routine, will not look good when they get older. Most girls are getting by off youth, once youth is no longer on their side, it's a wrap. That's one reason you should only fuck with women who work out on a regular basis, it means they care about looking good for as long as they possibly can.

However, do not bring your girlfriend to the gym. I see too many dudes at the gym with their chicks, holding hands, and other bullshit.

Look, we're men, we need a buffer zone.

The gym is one of the few buffer zones we have. We need a place we can go to without bullshit on our minds, and we need to pick shit up, we need to grunt, we need to push our bodies to get better and be stronger, and we need that with anybody hanging on, needing attention.

Your gym time is for you.

Let her gym time be for her.

8. The gym is a long game. Why? Because just like the woman, if you don't take care of yourself when you're young, you will look like shit when you get older. There are not a lot of good-looking men and women in their 40s. There just aren't. Right now, if you're in your 20s like I am, look we're a dime a dozen. Good-looking, in-shape young guys. Good-looking, in-shape 35 year-olds? 40 year-olds? Older?

The pool gets smaller and smaller as you get older.

At the end of the day, life is a competition. We're always competing for shit because shit is finite. Everybody doesn't get to drive the dope car, live in the dope crib, and fuck the bad bitches. They just don't.

Somebody's gotta drive the Geo, live in section 8 housing, and fuck fat, single mothers who have multiple kids from multiple dudes.

But I'll be damned if it's going to be me.

Within the competition, there's only one competition that you should care about, and that's the one that is you versus you.

How badly do you want to win?

[PartManPartMonkey]

You make a lot of good points. Consistency, not getting injured, and nutrition are key.

Most people refuse to do things they don't like unless forced. With the gym or fitness, it's no different. So unless a guy finds something that he likes to do, he won't last long. Unless of course he is highly motivated, and even that won't last years if he doesn't like what he's doing. So you need to find something you like to do, and will continue to do.

Regarding looking great -- I can keep a body far percentage at 12 percent, and remain strong, by working out with intensity 3-4 days a week and keeping nutrition in check. But that might not be looking great to some people, or meet their goals.

[cubanlinx]

I'm posting on my mobile, but this deserves a round of applause. Exactly my thoughts.
Another thing, the guys most compare themselves to have been working out for multiple years, are on something( which is nothing wrong, but for fuckssake be upfront about it), and may be extreme mesomorphs who build muscle just by finding parking space in the gym.
This is all you. On a side note jariel, how long have you been training? I'm guessing you're around 27.

[eatthishomie]

LOL my first car was a Geo. It was a solid reliable car. I had it for 14 years and 45-60 minute commutes back and forth were included in six of those years.

That aside, this thread is on point.

[kaotic]

The Iron Church was my savior.

I love going there, I love focusing, I love being "in my zone", I love being sore, staring at the mirror, making sure I got my form right.

I look better, feel better, fuck better.

I eat clean constantly and have cheat meal here and there.

I was a mere 130 wet, back in high school, I'm 164~ right now. I'm about 5'8 - that might not be much to you, but that's a fuck load for me.

Goal is to get past 170ish and start cutting.

No steroids, just pure, clean, organic food, and pure clean isolated whey protein.

I rarely drink beer, I drink vodka waters with 2 lemons nowadays.

Things I'm trying to this year is rehab a few irritated parts of my body (shoulder, pectoralis minor, and lower back L4 L5), get better with my legs and introduce cardio (which I never do).

I also need to order some stretch bands and start introducing yoga into my routine.

100% this is a long game, you need fucking patience, you might get hurt, you might get sick, but I implore you to move forward keep pushing.

-Stay hungry, stay fit, and never slack of-

You've got one fucking temple, don't burn it down, but build it to become great.

Oh and do you even lift bro ?

[lex the impaler]

Another excellent post Jariel. Was a good kick in the ass. Keep up the good work.

[Grey_Armor]

Also, what I see a lot of guys neglect is the art of writing down yor progress. How else are you going to track your results without tangible goals in place via the pen and pad( or smart phone app)? This goes for nutrition as well. Got to keep those macros in check if you want to see this abs, no short cuts.

[markus85]

(03-02-2016 01:37 PM)kaotic Wrote:  

I was a mere 130 wet, back in high school, I'm 164~ right now. I'm about 5'8 - that might not be much to you, but that's a fuck load for me.

I must ask since I have similiar stats are you happy with how you look? Generally I think people place too much importance on the scale...lot's of variables at work there. Most bro's would scof at 164 but at your height range i've seen plenty of people posses great physiques with meger poundage. Conor for instance came into the Diaz fight at 168 with a full belly and nobody would hardly call that skinny.

[BassPlayaYo]

This is great advice for when you're in your twenties to hopefully build a mindset and routine that allows you to do it in your later years where this becomes absolutely critical. You need only look at your parents to see what happens to you when you don't regularly engage in physical activity and weight lifting in particular.

[Rico Ramon]

Great post, I agree when I look around the gym and so many dudes with these huge guts, I'm thinking how the fuck did you get to that point, I give them credit for taking action tho.

The point about men in their 30s and 40s is right on point. If you are built or in shape in your 40s, your body will be the best intro in attracting younger women, not withstanding that your mental game is on point.

[texas]

(03-06-2016 03:05 PM)BassPlayaYo Wrote:  

This is great advice for when you're in your twenties to hopefully build a mindset and routine that allows you to do it in your later years where this becomes absolutely critical. You need only look at your parents to see what happens to you when you don't regularly engage in physical activity and weight lifting in particular.

That's a great point BassPlayaYo. I look at my folks who have gone more of the light exercise/jogging/cardio route for the past 30 years. While any exercise is better than none and turning into a fat ass, they are definitely looking thinner and will be bordering on frail in the next decade. Contrast that with others their age that I see out in the street or wherever. The ones who lift weights or have a physically demanding job look much tougher, more resilient, fill out their clothes better even at an older age, and are oftentimes accompanied by a younger woman.