[Thomas Gabriel]

Alright here's the story:

I have a female friend that was going to sell me a textbook. She's hot, but not really a target. She is the leader of all her girl friends. Anyways, I told her a week in advance that I needed the book, and she said she'd give it to me when we met up on the weekend. Well of course when we met up the weekend, she didn't have the book (we were going to a bar). So I said I'd pick it up the next day, but I needed it 100% for sure by Sunday because I had an exam Monday. So on Sunday I messaged her, she said to come pick it up, I got to her house, and she wasn't there. I called her and got no answer. Texted before the end of the night to see if she was there and still no response.

So I ended up getting messed up for my exam. I know she's fucking with me - I just can't believe it. She really didn't seem like the type to do that. I guess she is. How would you guys handle the situation?

If I get too mad, I can say goodbye to that social group. At the same time, it's a big fucking deal and I can't let that slide. In the past, I would just cease all contact, but that's even more of a lose situation for me this time, and I would like to work this in my favor.

[Oblivion77]

(02-02-2009 02:36 PM)Thomas Gabriel Wrote:  

Alright here's the story:

I have a female friend that was going to sell me a textbook. She's hot, but not really a target. She is the leader of all her girl friends. Anyways, I told her a week in advance that I needed the book, and she said she'd give it to me when we met up on the weekend. Well of course when we met up the weekend, she didn't have the book (we were going to a bar). So I said I'd pick it up the next day, but I needed it 100% for sure by Sunday because I had an exam Monday. So on Sunday I messaged her, she said to come pick it up, I got to her house, and she wasn't there. I called her and got no answer. Texted before the end of the night to see if she was there and still no response.

So I ended up getting messed up for my exam. I know she's fucking with me - I just can't believe it. She really didn't seem like the type to do that. I guess she is. How would you guys handle the situation?

If I get too mad, I can say goodbye to that social group. At the same time, it's a big fucking deal and I can't let that slide. In the past, I would just cease all contact, but that's even more of a lose situation for me this time, and I would like to work this in my favor.

Man, what just happened to you is quite bad.
A real slap on the face, especially if she was aware of your exam.
Is she really a friend of yours?
I find it hard to believe.
Friends dont do that.

That said, you are way better off without this girl.
I agree that if you let her walk away with that you would have sub-zero social proof with her group of girlfriends.

In other words, time to fight back, do it in a humorous way and get a kick from it.

What would I do?
Schedule something with her, anything, coffee, pick up the same book, whatever.
Then dont show up.

When she calls/text you, fuck around "didnt you get my text of cancellation? ho boy, I'm mortified. So you waited how long? that's terrible".

Then go from there.
Keep it funny.
You are amused.

Only once you have re-established yourself you can go back treating her as a friend.
Otherwise you end up being a push-over.


Personally I wouldnt waste my time with such a "friend".

Just as a general rule of thumb: when dealing with flakes you have to pay attention to two things.

- Stay ALPHA, no matter what.

- Dont let your self-esteem crashed by their behavior.
Also because flakes are often very screwed up people on an emotional level.
A pattern I noticed is that flakes desperately try to reproduce their own emotional inner turmoil discharging it on other people.
You dont need that.
Just walk away.
That's why it is important to have several options with different girls. Because having many you keep things in perspective and dont get lost into the BS one can throw at you.
Having many girls isnt important because you have to be a player, but mainly because providing alternatives they help you maintain a balanced and objective view when you bump into a messed up girl.

Remember that with flakes a very cheap freudian analysis will probably show you that they have screwed up parents.
FYI, As a joke I always ask girls about their mum and dad on the first date, and boy if you see issues coming from MILES ahead, after you hear about her "lovely close family!" ;-)

[twigman]

Man, thats just plain out dishonesty. This wasn't even a boy-girl flake, it was just person to person betrayal of trust. Like if someone tells you X and then doesn't deliver. Pretty frickin clear.

Just confront her with it : tell her she betrayed your confidence and you feel she lied to you. SMS it or if you want to do it more powerfully you can call her.

What more can you do? And then never trust her again.

[robjohn]

two words: date rape

[twigman]

Robjohn, I think it was Thomas Gabriel who was psychologically screwed here. Date rape is illegal for a very good reason.

[KPMGangster]

If you really cant leave that social group for whatever reason then just forget about that whole situation and just buy the book. That is the only way you can keep that friend group and also get your book. As for the girl just try to forget all about what happend and seeing as how she was being a b1tch about the whole situation she will forget about it too, if she hasn't already.