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Brisbane, Australia Datasheet
#1

Brisbane, Australia Datasheet

So I'd like to take a second to introduce myself. I've been reading this forum for about 2-3 years now and figured it was about time to finally contribute something of substance to this growing library of pickup gold. As I've recently returned from a 2 year stint living in the mid-tier, relatively off-the-radar Australian city of Brisbane, Queensland I figured I'd add something here now that I'm voluntarily unemployed again (doing a brief USA tour before some upcoming LatAm travels) and have a bit of free time.

About me: 30, 6ft, athletic build, good looking, American, mediocre to decent game, light complexion. I usually wear a v neck tee with some tailored jeans and boat shoes sans socks - not exactly a style icon. My overall problem is consistency and relying too much on the looks. I'm outdoorsy, a bit of an introvert, and have a thing for thin brunettes with nice big firm butts.

OVERVIEW OF THE CITY
First thing to point out is this - many Aussies are quick to talk shit on Brisbane but in my opinion Brisbane is merely misunderstood, and surely underrated in my book.

It is a very segmented city broken up into many smaller suburbs having their own zip code and personality for that matter. The Brisbane River snakes through the city effectively dividing it geographically and there are a few iconic bridges crossing it (the Story Bridge comes to mind). To be fair, Brisbane isn't the most touristy or even tourist-friendly city. There are a lot of other Australian destinations that will obviously overshadow this place for first-time tourists. There is not a ton of shit to do and see (for tourists) like there is in say Sydney or Melbourne (e.g. guided tours, masses of hotels and places to stay) and the architecture isn't as interesting as those places either. There is arguably less of an artsy scene here but that isn't to say it doesn't exist. There are no real iconic buildings like the Opera House in Sydney or the Flinders Street Station in Melbourne. But the skyline at night is better than Melbourne in my opinion, and by a long shot (especially when viewed from the top of Kangaroo Point). The food scene is still developing but it definitely can't compete with the likes of Melbourne or Sydney but there's good eats if you know where to look. But in all Brisbane is a city that shines when it comes to the little things. And it also has that up-and-coming and most definitely underrated feel. Let me explain.

The weather. It is sunshine nearly every day. The weathermen have it pretty easy here. Only problem is the sun rises early. Like 5 AM in the summers and it does tend to set pretty early. Never usually later than 630 or 7. Summers are hot (some days reach over 100F easy), the sun is very intense (especially the UV), and you will need sunblock and a proper Queensland hat to keep it off you. The rest of the year is very enjoyable in my opinion, with many locals expressing that their favorite month is May or June when it is warm and sunny 60-80sF during the days and cools down into the 50s (F) at night. Very pleasant indeed. There are maybe two days a year when the temp drops into the upper 40s (F) and this only happens at night. It generally isn't as humid as places like Florida but it can be worse in the summer months.

Proximity to world class beaches. While Brisbane isn't situated directly on the beach (I was actually a little bit pissed when I learned this AFTER moving here), it is within close proximity to some stunning beaches. Though Brisbane does have the Southbank pool (free to public) which is a sandy manmade pool they built right along the Brisbane river in a very walkable part of town. The Gold Coast is a gorgeous stretch of white sand beaches within roughly a 50 minute to 1 hr drive east of the city. However it has a bad reputation with the locals for being trashy and commercialized - note that this only really applies to Surfer's Paradise (Aussies are great at exaggerating and embellishing - it isn't that bad here). The Sunshine Coast is in my opinion even a more stunning and perhaps slightly less touristy stretch of beach that is perhaps a bit less discovered and has arguably nicer sand. But really, it's all gorgeous. The sand is fine silica and a squeaking sound is produced when your bare feet glide across it. The air is very clean and you will mainly find evergreen trees as opposed to palm trees on the beaches here. My favorite day trips are Burleigh Heads (reachable via Queensland Rail and a short 6km bike ride from the Varsity Lakes train station) Beach in Gold Coast and Caloundra and also Noosa which are roughly a 1.5 hr drive. Also there are some pretty sweet surf beaches around Cooloongatta where they also have international surfing competitions. I'm not much of a surfer but some of my surfer friends talk it up.

Fresh food and coffee. I alluded to the food quality earlier. Generally not great are the prepared food options (unless you know where to look - they won't jump out at you). However, there are many awesome fresh food markets year-round (West End market, Eagle Farm market, Wednesday market in the CBD), New Farm market) offering amazingly fresh local seasonal produce like mangos, apples, papaya, avocados, pumpkin, cherries, watermelon, cilantro, heirloom tomatoes, chili peppers, etc. Anything you could imagine you will find here aside from hispanic produce like tomatillos. The coffee is excellent if you know where to look. Aussie coffee culture and quality dominates American coffee culture by a LONG shot, even in Brisbane. My favorites in town are Bass Espresso (West End), Strauss (CBD), and Cup (Woolloongabba).

Bike friendly. I didn't own a car here for two years (mainly dated girls with cars) but you don't necessarily need one if you live within 5-7k of the city. There are some great bike only paths going through the city and all along the Brisbane River which runs throughout the city of Brisbane. Note that some neighborhoods are pretty hilly like Highgate Hill and Paddington. Also there is a City Cycle program here for those who care.

Public transit. Nowhere near as good as Melbourne but actually it's not THAT bad. Though it is among some of the most expensive I've dealt with anywhere in the world. Buses run most places within and around the city and there is a respectable train network where you can reach the coast and many parts north, west, south, and east of the city. Also there's a ferry network here that runs really often. It cruises up and down the Brisbane river and takes you to places like the University of Queensland, the CBD, New Farm, and West End, among others. It's a cheap date idea especially for traveler chicks you meet for night time dates to check the stunning Brissie skyline.

The vibe. Brisbane is relaxed. The city isn't very hustle bustle. People are pretty chilled out here and generally not in a hurry. People walk slower than they do in Melbourne - I know I've lived in both cities. People are generally very friendly and aren't afraid to talk to strangers. This place used to be much more rural 10+ years ago and it definitely maintains that big country town feel even today. It is small (2 million+ metro population). I would routinely run into people that I know or am acquainted with on a weekly if not daily basis (especially in West End). People spend a lot of time outside. Eating, drinking, hanging on the veranda with friends and a guitar is where it's at here.

THE GIRLS
The legal drinking age here is 18! Lots of youngness running around. I'd say that racially, Brisbane is a relatively homogenous city. Meaning that it's mainly white chicks with European decent. Although there is a decent variety of international travelers/residents and foreigners going to university here. Lots of Brazilians, some Colombians, Vietnamese, Chinese, Kiwis (NZ), Thai, fair amount of Italians (captured this flag), UK (Scotland and England), etc. Though very few black (African) girls. Not many Mexicans either. The few Africans I met were off the boat Africans from places like Sudan and Ethiopia or white Africans from South Africa. The local chicks here I believe are genetically more beautiful and fit than many other parts of Australia (though Sydney and Melbourne have some hotties), however they tend to be a bit more "bogan." Think slightly rednecky. They don't always dress super classy. A popular outfit is a short skirt with a tank top showing midriff and black ankle high Doc Martens. Sometimes they'll sneak a flask of Canadian Club in their purse with them to the club. Many chicks smoke like chimneys. And there is a bit of a slightly annoying Brisbane accent that is decipherable from other parts of Australia where it sounds like they are talking while pinching their noses. Nonetheless, these girls I found to be very friendly, approachable, reasonably well-traveled (Bali doesn't count!), fun, mostly easy, but not super cultured as compared to Melbourne and Sydney girls. And they seem to love a good banter session, which I haven't totally mastered yet.

I had a handful of locals from here and a few from Melbourne as well that I picked up from both day and night game. The ex girlfriend (local) I had for half the time was met via indirect night game. Also, 5 of the 6 Brisbane locals I banged here were not on any form of birth control (including ex GF of one year). Small sample size but VERY different than my experience with American girl usage rates. One other important note is these chicks generally don't age well. It seems that once they hit 33+ it starts going downhill pretty quickly. The UV index here is pretty horrible and not enough girls here seem to protect themselves from the sun and it definitely shows. Girls here tend to look older than they are, but this rapidly escalates once the 30s hits. Get 'em while they're young! Also SNL are quite doable here but I still felt like American girls are easier for SNL overall - again limited sample size.

NIGHT GAME
Nightlife here is concentrated in a few different areas. Bars are open til 3, but some close earlier. Probably the main nightlife area is called Fortitude Valley which is just east of the CBD. Next up is the cluster of nightlife around Caxton Street which is basically where the sports stadium (Suncorp) is located. Also, there is New Farm which is a bit south of Fortitude Valley, and of course I can't forget the CBD where there actually are a few pubs and clubs that are big on Friday and sometimes even Saturday nights. There are a dozen or more night life establishments in West End also.

Fortitude Valley - this is basically where Brisbane goes to get sloppy drunk and/or hookup. Generally it's the younger crowd here but it's all ages depending on where you go. I've picked up from here only once, but the overall vibe here is not really my cup of tea. Girls are usually dressed pretty slutty and I get the impression they're looking to pounce for the most part. I usually use indirect game in the evenings, and I'd probably go with that here. There are a handful of clubs, as well as numerous live music venues. There's a walking-only strip of somewhat sleezy bars and venues along Brunswick St. here where most of the action is centered around. From here the nightlife continues in a few blocks in either direction, gradually getting quieter as you walk in any direction. I picked up from a place called the Empire Hotel which is right on Brunswick, though I wouldn't specifically recommend this place.

Fortitude Valley
Black Bear Lodge - a cool intimate live music venue with also some dancing and mingling possible
The Bowery - a slightly upscale place serving pretty tasty albeit pricy ($16+) cocktails with a 25 and up crowd and funky DJ tunes.
Cloudland - a slightly more upscale place where you'll need to dress up (this is Brisbane, a collared shirt and closed shoes is all you need) to get in. The place converts from a dining establishments to a club on the weekends. Make sure you wear that collared shirt!
The Press Club - live music on weekends with a bar and small dance floor and a few classy ladies about here
The Zoo - decent live music venue also

Caxton Street - the sporty area of town, but attracts all walks of life
Lefty's - I love this place, easily my fave in this area, mostly for Friday and Sat nights. Late 20's - 30's crowd here. Plenty of sexy women. Usually have live jams like rockabilly come through with a little dance floor in front. Plus they have tasty boilermaker menu here. Has upper level with couches and view of band and first floor. Has a saloon feel with deer heads on the wall but with a dance floor - fun place.

West End - this place mostly shuts down by midnight, has more of a bohemian crowd
Archive - has a vast selection of beer. Picked up from here before. Hit or miss crowd with hit or miss live music, but excellent selection of good craft beers both local and imported.
The Loft - a newer place directly upstairs from Archive. A bit more upscale and this is more of a lounge.
The Hi-Fi - a pretty sweet live music venue with good setup and acoustics and plenty of ladies, dance floor, depending on the bands playing; met my ex GF here
The Rumpus Room - this place is the only late-night past 12 AM venue in West End that I know of. It can get a bit desperate after midnight here and the ratios quickly head the wrong way but it sometimes has some stragglers here during drum and bass nights. Picked up here before.
Lock'n'Load - a smaller bar that usually has some live music on weekends; decent beer selection and I've picked up here before.
Motor Room - a bit of a live music menu with a limited bar playing free music on weekends. Situated within a night market with street food vendors. Great place to meet Brazilian and other foreign chicks, as well as locals.

CBD
The Embassy - had fun at this place on a Friday night; has a dance floor with mostly cheesy music but good times anyway
The Victory Hotel - another Friday place with the after-work crowd; has more of a pub feel with an outdoor beer hall
Friday's - a club on the waterfront where you can find many cute looking but bogan chicks and dancing with big outdoor beer garden

Southbank
Tomahawks - another great beer bar with excellent beers on tap (Same owners as Tippler's tap)
There are also a few places right on the river that may be worth checking out. There's usually always some sexy ladies walking about down here from Thurs to Sunday.

New Farm/ Newstead
Green Beacon Brewing - a great microbrewery that is a great place to come for some good brews made on site. Also a pretty good date spot, but they don't really serve any food aside from oysters I believe.
Newstead Brewing Compnay - a higher scale version of Green Beacon with a greater variety of beer (but not as good) plus some guest taps and some decently tasty food. Had a good steak here.
The Tivoli - an interesting live music venues with international touring bands
Tippler's Tap - a pretty sweet beer bar with fantastic tap beers, not great for picking up necessarily
James St. - this stretch of street has your late twenties and up crowd. Plenty of yoga girls, divorced women, and horny soccer moms looking to cheat on hubby here, plus general cougars

DAY GAME
Queen Street Mall - Probably one of the best places to do this any day of the week, but especially weekends when there's a ton of volume and there's usually live music on the main stage there. Plenty of sexy ladies in groups and even by themselves. Also quite a few tourists mingling about here. I've met a few girls this way and even banged a girl from chatting her up while we were randomly getting reflexology foot massages next to each other ha!

Southbank - a very walking friendly area along the river, great for chatting up girls strollng along either in groups or by themselves or walking to or from Griffith University or QUT. Lots of students and travelers hang out down here by the river.

Boundary Street, West End - this is more of the hippie (think dreads and no shoes crowd) however there are a few sexy healthy babes walking around, and quite a few backpackers too as there are a few hostels nearby

Botanical Gardens - I met a Colombian chick here while she was walking around. I would come down here during lunch break sometimes to chat up girls

Coffeshops - this one is obvious, but there are lots of coffee shops in this town. Look around.

FINAL THOUGHTS
This place may not be for everyone, especially if you don't do well in the heat. All in all, it's a great place to live, especially once you develop a social circle as that definitely helps your game here. I will continue to defend this place, because I had a really great time the 2 years I spent. It's a friendly place with kind locals, sexy women, and a very laid back vibe and sooner or later this place will get more love from the tourist circuit. Any questions just ask.

Latin American Coffee Guide
-What other people think of you is none of your business.
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#2

Brisbane, Australia Datasheet

Yeah I have to agree with you. I love BrisVegas, I had a ball while I was based up there with the Army..I also loved going down to Byron Bay.It's like all the great beaches are at your finger tips.
I found the girls to be very friendly.
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#3

Brisbane, Australia Datasheet

I haven't visited all of these clubs in Fortitude Valley so I can't speak for it, but otherwise this data-sheet matches my experience. Thanks for putting in the effort!

"Imagine" by HCE | Hitler reacts to Battle of Montreal | An alternative use for squid that has never crossed your mind before
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#4

Brisbane, Australia Datasheet

I think this is the most positive thing I've ever read about living in Brisbane.

Brisbane's problem is that it has no competitive advantages. Sydney might be exorbitantly expensive but it's a big, globally important city with good weather/beaches. Melbourne is almost as large but cheaper and both a cultural and sporting capital. Perth has great beaches, sunshine and strong employment prospects. The Gold Coast is a beachside sin city. Byron Bay is a beachside hippie commune. What does Brisbane have?

One thing you consistently hear from people who grew up there is that it's basically a huge country town rather than a proper city, and this datasheet touches on that. There's not much to do, it's lacking in culture, there's no beaches in the city itself and it's hard to find a white collar job compared to Sydney/Melbourne/Perth. Plus the girl's are less attractive and trashier relative to the rest of Australia which isn't exactly a high bar to beat (but not by a huge amount, Queensland stereotypes colour people's perceptions). All in all I just don't see any reason for a single guy to move there.
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#5

Brisbane, Australia Datasheet

Having been to both, I would rather live on the Gold Coast than Brisbane. Better night life and it actually has beaches. Even if it's over-commercialized, that's not necessarily a bad thing for a single guy as you'll always have new talent in the area. If root and boot is your style then it's especially perfect.

Brisbane just seemed rather dull to me. Queen street reminds me of Rundle Mall in Adelaide (Boring!) and Fortitude Valley is the only place where anything really happens at night. "Family Night Club" was meant to be voted best Australian club when I went and was pretty impressive but not enough to save the night life of an entire city. The women aren't bad looking but they're not my type and probably not the type of a lot of the Europeans/Americans on this forum. They have the typical Australian stereotype look (Blonde hair, light eyes, fit but in an unfeminine way, dress like slobs), rather than the classier European-descent look that you often find in Melbourne, Sydney and even Adelaide.
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#6

Brisbane, Australia Datasheet

To respond to a few of you here, I'd have to say that Brisbane is a place that has more appeal as a city to live in as opposed to one to visit on a short stay. It takes some time to penetrate the area and get in tune with the lifestyle and pace of living here, and again, it's clearly not for everyone. This sheet was meant to provide an alternate and optimistic perspective on an underdog city that otherwise gets a lot of negative publicity amongst many people who visit and especially native Aussies.

When I moved here, the economy was booming (AUD to USD was 1.07) and probably at the peak of the employment bubble, so getting a job (civil engineering) was super easy. Nowadays, the economy is taking a bit of a shit (AUD to USD is 0.82) and there isn't a lot of hiring in my sector. Brisbane for me was a great little stopover point to grow some shallow roots and save up some cash very quickly for the next adventure. While it also served as a great base for exploring some pretty cool areas like Byron Bay, North Stradbroke Island, Kakadu National Park, etc. Let's put it this way - there's certainly worse places in the world where you can find yourself.

Furthermore, I forgot to discuss the crime issue, or lack thereof. Not worrying about having to lock your front door or getting robbed at gunpoint while walking alone late at night is another appealing facet of life here. But the comments via the trashy ladies are all too valid. Of course you can find classy ladies mostly anywhere if you know where to look.

Latin American Coffee Guide
-What other people think of you is none of your business.
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#7

Brisbane, Australia Datasheet

How many Huntsman spiders have you seen during your stay in Brisbane?

"Imagine" by HCE | Hitler reacts to Battle of Montreal | An alternative use for squid that has never crossed your mind before
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#8

Brisbane, Australia Datasheet

Yeah seriously. I got over my fear of spiders there just from sheer over exposure. Eventually you get desensitized to those big bastards.

Latin American Coffee Guide
-What other people think of you is none of your business.
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#9

Brisbane, Australia Datasheet

Australia as a whole is super safe anyway. Gun crime like you mentioned is virtually non-existent everywhere, so you can't count that as a plus towards Brisbane really.
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#10

Brisbane, Australia Datasheet

I've wondered about the Gold Coast.

Instagram is littered with tons of cute little youngins from Gold Coast
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#11

Brisbane, Australia Datasheet

Quote: (12-19-2014 11:55 PM)Biz Wrote:  

I've wondered about the Gold Coast.

Instagram is littered with tons of cute little youngins from Gold Coast
I grew up there before moving to Melbourne, the quality is great but GC is quite a small place overall.

Nightlife is well.. ok not fantastic. I've only been out to surfers paradise a couple of times when I visited, you could do pretty well through other means though.
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#12

Brisbane, Australia Datasheet

Just saw the ROK article on Australia, and I never realised it was that bad! But my question is: Is the worst city in Australia comparable to the favorite city we all love to hate... Toronto in terms of women?
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#13

Brisbane, Australia Datasheet

I'm not sure against what reference Brisbane, or any other Australian city for that matter, is being praised in this thread.
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#14

Brisbane, Australia Datasheet

Great write up. As someone who lives about 3km from the Valley you have a few more venues you could probably add.

Ric's/RG's
Alfred and Constance (Great for Friday nights)
Sabotage (Awesome music)
Crowbar (For those who love their Metal)
Underdog (Great music once again and plenty of different stages with different styles)
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#15

Brisbane, Australia Datasheet

Is there anything to do/go out in Brisbane during the week?
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#16

Brisbane, Australia Datasheet

Brisbane was actually my favourite city whilst i lived in Aus. But then I’m from Manchester (uk) so prefer the smaller city life as compared to a London or Sydney

The weather helped though as I was going through my storm chasing days
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#17

Brisbane, Australia Datasheet

Excellent datasheet bro, respect!
I agree that this city does not have as much to offer for tourists as the two big competitors down south, but when it comes to quality of life for its residents, it is hands down #1, thanks to the amazing climate and lower cost of living (compared to SYD or MEL).
I have been doing daygame in Brisbane on and off for five years. You are right about the places to go and I usually stick to them. I have tired some places in the suburbs, but the density of approachable girls there is just not worth it. Out of the four placed mentioned, I love the botanical gardens the best. There is a nice coffee shop towards QUT University which is perfect for Instant Dates.
One thing that has not been mentioned are the amazing places in close proximity: Gold Coast, Sunshine Coast and Byron Bay. Love to take my girls there for a weekend.
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