[Excalibur]

Not to high-jack the thread on best sex ever, but I've been wanting to discuss this for a long time. This is actually motivated my 2 girls laid this year. One was really, really good in bed while the other one was 2nd if not the worst lay ever. I've added some suggestion from the other thread.

Attitude

Submissive, but not passive. This is just my personal preference. Not everyone would agree.

Good - energetic.
Bad - Lazy. Some girl want sex, but when you get going, she lies there like a pillow and barely moves. i.e. starfish.

Good - Horny girls. I like it when girls initiate sex non verbally like nuzzling up to you, go down on you unexpectedly, or start groping for you cock.
Bad - not horny. Not fun when it always feel like you are trying to have sex with her, and she is "giving it up" to you.

Sexually adventurously is good. Not gonna get into the details, might be a totally different topic. But last girl when I mentioned 3 somes she got all weirded out. A total turn off. It would be better if she just smiles, and say, maybe. Even better if she really want to try.

Good - Girls who are in the moment, really into it.
Bad - Not in the moment. Hate it when a girl laughs or smiles while banging. I prefer they have a expression or pleasure or even slight pain. Ok to laugh or giggle when switching positions, but not while your dick is in her.

If she swallows. When girls don't swallow or make a big deal about you cumming in her mouth it's a big turn off. Ok if the girl doesn't swallow but let you cum in her mouth and sneak away to spit it out. Not as good if she swallows.

Good - Girls who moan or screams or are loud. Quiet is ok if she lets out some noise uncontrollably. Some guy mention moan intensely but not speak.
Bad - Girls whimper, some Asian girls do this, very annoying

Dirty talk - this is a tricky one. But some girls can just dirty talk and get me rock hard.

Worshiping your cock - this is an ego thing. When a girl mention how big or nice my cock is, it get extra hard.

Complement your body.

Get down on her knees to unzip you pants to give BJ

Seductive look. Knows how to move her body sexually.

Adventurous, public sex, outdoor sex

Bad - Reluctance to give bj, reluctance in anything

Technique

This is a tough one. Some girls just move her hip the right way. I guess this is just compatibility. Some girls get into it, thrust perfectly the way you want it. Some girls get off by moving against your cock in a very uncomfortable position. Some just have the perfect rhythm for you. Some just not, but she might be perfect for another guy. Also some girl can squeeze their ass in rhythm almost massaging your cock. Get me to cum real fast.

Good blow job - this can spin off into a totally different thread

Good - Wrapping legs around, clawing you back, arching her back

Dildos kind of turn me off unless I am the one who suggest it

Bad - Too tight of grip on hand job

Bad - Weird exaggerated movement

The way they touch you, caresses your body.

Pussy

Good - Wet to super wet pussy. Sometimes too wet it lack sensation, but fun when you see a huge puddle or wet spot under the girl

Bad - Dry is obviously not so good. This last girl said, "Let me check if I am wet." then stuck her finger down there WTF. Weird. Total turn off.

Nice looking pussy - I think most girls have a nice looking one, but if it looks too weird I guess it can be a turn off.

Good - taste good, smell good
Bad - taste weird, smell funky

Good - waxed or very well trimmed.
Bad - bushy or too stubbly :dry:

Good - Deep pussy??? This is a strange one. Once in a while you get a girl that you seem to hit the bottom, and just cannot thrust away like you would want. Maybe that's why girls like thick but not necessary long cock?

Tight vagina is always good. Never really had a loose one, but I can imagine it being bad.

Appearance and Presentation

Nice ass. Of course the hotter, more beautiful the girl is, the better the sex. Nice face, eyes, hair, skin, lips, breast, legs, abs are all important. But in terms of the act of banging, I feel the ass is #1. A pretty girl with a horrible, flat ass is a big turn off.

Looks hot in lingerie. Unfortuantely a lot of girls cannot pull of lingerie although they can still be very sexy. Some girls should just stick with cotton undie/thong and a braless t-shirt/tank top. You got to have a pretty hot body to look good in Victoria Secret.

A girl with a nice perfume or scent is always good. Sweaty and body odor is obviously BAD.

Misc

Sensitive body parts - I like it when a girl is very sensitive. You nibble on her neck or ear and she just goes crazy.

Not so hot girls, but you want to do dirty things to them because they are not so hot

Girls who cum, cum easily, or more than once. Some girls take forever to cum or never cum at all. Not a deal breaker, but it's just so much more fun when a girl cums multiple times in one session.


Good - you like her very much, you love her.
Bad - you think she's low valued.

Other have mentioned it, chemistry. When you kiss some lips is just sends tingle down your spine or even a hard on. Some pussy is just sweet and make you cum really good.

Mutual orgasm - love it!

I am sure I am missing something. Please share.

[Sonoma]

I'm on the edge with a girl being so good at sex that I realize I'm the 100th person to hit it

Girls who are obviously virgins are also kind of iffy because then I have to tell them about all the STDs I'm about to expose them to

Girls who don't rawdog make me relieved to know I can't get any worse STD, but I also can barely get a hard on. Soooooo

[Rawmeo]

My last girl yesterday had a very "short" pussy. She was tight, but I was just sliding my cock 1/2 in and I already hit the bottom. I almost lost my boner at that time.

Also giggling / laughing is a major turnoff for me. Sometimes I start licking some pussy, and she starts talking about her weekend and all that. I just ignore, but she starts laughing too, makes me think she's not "in the moment". When a girl starts talking I usually kiss her mid-sentence, which means "shhhhhhhhhhhhhh".

[Catch 22]

This is all spot on. The other important question is, are there any ways to tell who's good and who's bad, short of getting them into bed? I haven't found many correlations. Last week, I day-2 notched a girl who I thought was going to be amazing based on day-1, and I end up barely getting off. Tonight, went back to the well with somebody who wasn't that great last time, and was pleasantly surprised with some really good sex. It's great when a girl you have little confidence in ends up being great in bed, but for each of those you seem to get somebody who doesn't live up to expectations. I haven't been able to find any rhyme or reason.

[Phoenix]

Yes perhaps the reason kissing evolved as a sexual behaviour was to stop the girl talking .

Good is generally "enthusiastic". I especially like when they get enthusiastic and 'clutch you in' when you cum, that's very hot. So is when the girl acts 'actively submissive', it naturally awakens your complementary dominance response and it's hot. Also any sign of pleasure and 'wanting it' is great, such as grabbing your butt and back, and of course moaning. Good sex skills, like giving a good BJ, is nice, but not necessary for me. A sexy inexperienced girl in missionary position is fine as long as its enthusiastically received.

Bad includes making the escalation clinical in any way, talking during, not enthusiastically receiving you, when the girl keeps going dry, if the girl has any physical turn-offs, her having fish-breath.

Regarding pussy tightness, I think this causes problems too. It can leave you with an aching dick and it can cause you to bust too fast. Her having a 'small pussy' can cause problems such as pain for her and her drying out, which prevents immersion in the act.

[sandman972]

Good sex is a combination of a tight pussy and enthusiasm. Theres no bigger turn off for me than a girl that lays there, and moans here and there.

Lets be honest, we all want to re-live that hot porno clip we just watched. Oddly enough, the hotter the women iv bedded, the more they do resemble that.

[ShooterMikgavin]

This list just about hits the nail on the head for my preferences and pet peeves

Bad breath is also an absolute travesty while boning a girl, typically happens when you go for the morning session on a ONS. Had one that kept on wanting to kiss til I noticed it and turned my head, so she proceeded to eat out my ear with her stank breath. All I could do was cringe and pound away.

Another is chicks that try to get you to go down on them, and use it as some kind of bargaining chip for them to give you head. And finally girls that try to be super quiet and not moan as if they are taking it like a champ but you can see are making a concerted effort to not make noise as some kinda pride thing.

[Hankk]

It seems I am pretty close to OP in what we enjoy in sex. I would add that submissive yet active thing is a real turn on. She is the actress that i direct but she improvises. If she has a great body and can pull of the victorias secret carter&stockings thing i am willing to accept less beautiful visage. Her in lingerie on her knees and your wearing a suit while she worships your cock is a big turn on. Dirty talk included if it suits the mood, sometimes not.

Also when they get mentally off when you cum inside their pussy or on their bodies. Some girls seem to enjoy that more than the sex itself. They have also ,without exception, been the best girls to have sex with.

Bad sex just happens with some girls. Usually it is her inhibitions, passiveness or awkwardess. Sometimes we just are not compatible. I do not particularly enjoy hammering awkward and passive girls like i know some of my mates do. It just does not turn me on. An example of this would be typical japanese porn where the chick is just whimpering passively while being pounded by tiny eastern dicks. However, it does work for me in a mini LTR setting when i just use my girl for a quick release and in that context it is hot.

-Hankk

[Excalibur]

Good feed back.

I just thought of a few other ones.

- When a girl is on top and she moves up and down with too big of a movement. I don't a small cock, but is not like I have a nine incher. When you are hopping up and down don't be jumping a foot of the bed, couple of inches is enough. One time it slipped out, and the girl came down on my erect penis. May or may not done permanent damage. My tool is slightly curved now, and I wonder if it was due to that incident. So whenever a girl is moving up and down too much, I get nervous, lose focus, hence bad sex.

- girl not confident in her body. Trust me girl, if I don't like your body I would turn the lights off and f-u with my eyes closed. Otherwise assume I like to see your body.

- trying to kiss you after giving you a BJ or worse after you cum in her mouth. One time I cum on a girl's face and she had the audacity of trying to wipe some of the cum on my face!!! Needless to say that relationship did not last long.
- This other girl, when I save a week of load and cum all over her face. She said, "Wow, that's a lot". Smiles and proceed to stick her tongue out to lick the cum around her mouth. Although she does not have the perfect ass or breasts, sex with her was always fantastic.

- Man and their ego. Yes, I love it when a girl tell me how big and thick I am, and how big, how much my load is.

- Chimney breath

[roberto]

(12-20-2014 11:20 AM)Excalibur Wrote:  

- trying to kiss you after giving you a BJ

My cock is clean, she can kiss me all she likes. Doesn't bother me. Would draw the line at cum though.

My thing at the moment is meditating during sex. I get off more on the power of making a girl cum multiple times before finally coming 'back into the room' and allowing a mutual orgasm to consume us both. I seem to manage to sync with most girls. Hey, that's one thing I can't stand- chicks who can't (or won't allow themselves?) to orgasm.

[Phoenix]

(12-20-2014 01:59 PM)roberto Wrote:  

I get off more on the power of making a girl cum multiple times before finally coming 'back into the room' and allowing a mutual orgasm to consume us both. I seem to manage to sync with most girls.

How do you generally do this? And how long does it normally take? Cheers

[roberto]

(12-21-2014 04:24 AM)Phoenix Wrote:  

(12-20-2014 01:59 PM)roberto Wrote:  

I get off more on the power of making a girl cum multiple times before finally coming 'back into the room' and allowing a mutual orgasm to consume us both. I seem to manage to sync with most girls.

How do you generally do this? And how long does it normally take? Cheers

It's hard to describe. I started by learning to 'control' my feelings of sensation during sex using methods such as focusing on one unattractive feature such as a mole on the girls back (props to whoever said that on here, can't remember). Thinking of completely unrelated, sometimes unpleasant things also helped.

This got me to the stage where I could pound away without coming even close to orgasm. I can't remember the last time I had to mentally reach outside the room for 'depressant' stimuli during sex. My default thought during sex now is 'meh, whatever'.

Once at that stage, you become more aware of the stage the girl is at on her journey to orgasm. Previously her pussy tightening would have lead to an often unsuccessful battle of wills as my body involuntarily began the journey to orgasm, and got there too early . Now I just ride through with her and carry on.

It's not like edging, or changing position and 'starting over' (trying to describe that loss of sexual build up here!). It's like, after two minutes shagging I'm in 'the zone' and remain there until I choose to come out of it and cum.

One thing I did find is that I could become 'too' disconnected. I had one girl who thought I wasn't really into it with her. Now I find it best to have my dick doing it's thing with no 'feedback' to me, meanwhile I'm actually making a conscious effort to grab her, pull her hair and lay hands on her in a dominating way. Sometimes this can try to push my animal instinct back into the situation, and I have to make an effort to maintain my 'meh, whatever' brain stage. It sometimes even feels like I'm trying to tell myself that I don't want to be fucking this girl.

The power trip from her coming multiple times and myself just feeling 'meh' about the whole situation is immense. At that point in time you own that girl, and nothing will distract her from getting that next orgasm from you. When I'm done I just gauge when she will next come and release myself 'back into the room' to cum.

I'm making a hash job at explaining this, I know. There will be many others on this forum I'm sure with the same experience who are more in touch with their consciousness and therefore better able to put this into words.

Edit- to be truthfull, I think 'meditating during sex' is the wrong way to describe this. I'm still a beginner as regards true meditation. Better to describe it as controlling my sensation/reaction during sex.

How long did it take me? Not that long. I had a regular girl who sex was starting to get stale with. Ah, I remember now. I was the perfect happy medium of drunkness one night and that blocked the sensation but I stayed hard. Then I discovered how good it felt to be in control of her orgasms. She came four times that night, I didn't manage to come due to whiskey but went to sleep satisfied due to the power trip. I resolved to pursue this idea further, and I think i searched on here for tips. Maybe three months of mentally introducing depressant stimuli and then I found I no longer needed them.

My PB is giving a chick 8 orgasms in one night, two of them oral. Serious power trip.

My record using this with new SNLs is not brilliant though. Need to know the chick a bit first, for the moment at least. So there goes my career as a porn star. Oh well.

[Pride male]

Tight pussy vs loose pussy.

[Lizard King]

Too subjective to define.

you don't need rocket appliances to know that: good sex for me=draining my balls in to a female. Draining balls in to feminine and submissive hottie is obviously epitome of 'good sex'.

[Phoenix]

(12-21-2014 08:59 AM)roberto Wrote:  

This got me to the stage where I could pound away without coming even close to orgasm. I can't remember the last time I had to mentally reach outside the room for 'depressant' stimuli during sex. My default thought during sex now is 'meh, whatever'.

Once at that stage, you become more aware of the stage the girl is at on her journey to orgasm. Previously her pussy tightening would have lead to an often unsuccessful battle of wills as my body involuntarily began the journey to orgasm, and got there too early . Now I just ride through with her and carry on.

It's not like edging, or changing position and 'starting over' (trying to describe that loss of sexual build up here!). It's like, after two minutes shagging I'm in 'the zone' and remain there until I choose to come out of it and cum.

One thing I did find is that I could become 'too' disconnected. I had one girl who thought I wasn't really into it with her. Now I find it best to have my dick doing it's thing with no 'feedback' to me, meanwhile I'm actually making a conscious effort to grab her, pull her hair and lay hands on her in a dominating way. Sometimes this can try to push my animal instinct back into the situation, and I have to make an effort to maintain my 'meh, whatever' brain stage. It sometimes even feels like I'm trying to tell myself that I don't want to be fucking this girl.

The power trip from her coming multiple times and myself just feeling 'meh' about the whole situation is immense. At that point in time you own that girl, and nothing will distract her from getting that next orgasm from you. When I'm done I just gauge when she will next come and release myself 'back into the room' to cum.

..

My PB is giving a chick 8 orgasms in one night, two of them oral. Serious power trip.

Very interesting, thanks for posting this. This is basically where I want to be.

As I currently see it, a girls orgasms come from the simultaneous action of:
- Time. I.e. continuous pounding away. Switching positions may delay your orgasm, but they also distract her from hers, and kill the 'immersion'.
- Power. I.e grinding deep into her and pounding hard (except doggystyle and legs-back, where you can kill immersion due to hitting her cervix and hurting her).
- Dominance. I.e. 'aggressiveness' during sex, such as things you say, growls, physically controlling her etc.
- Emotion/Immersion. If the girl is nervous or thinking too much because you aren't familiar with each other, it's harder for her to move towards orgasm. This will also be affected by how much she likes you or turned on by you she is.

Your own orgasms of course, come from:
- Time
- Stimulation (depends on position, alcohol, condom, how many times you've already busted etc, but also on Power)
- Arousal

Hence you need to reduce your own time, stimulation, and arousal, whilst increasing delivery of time, power, dominance, emotion/immersion.

Your time and her time is a direct overlap. Foreplay is one obvious and common way around this. A lot of guys rely on working on her with mouth and fingers first. She receives sexual stimulation, but you receive none.

Emotion/immersion doesn't have much overlap with your factors, so its an obvious one you can boost. Again many men use foreplay, but the level of her comfort with you extends back even further (e.g. how long you've been together). I'm guessing for SNLs you'd have to be very good at deep-diving during conversation and evoking the sense of "I felt like I'd known him my whole life", and building tension.

Power and stimulation overlap to a large extent. It's difficult to pound hard and not thereby increase your own stimulation. This is why some people say "wear a thicker condom". However the girl can ride on top - this allows her to grind hard, but it's a less stimulating position for you. I've noticed that when a girl wants to take control and make herself cum, she always does this. It's not "you giving her an orgasm", however.

Arousal doesn't have much overlap. It's highly under your control. I think this makes it the linchpin. If you can keep your arousal down, whilst pounding away hard, long, and dominantly, you'll bring her to orgasm without doing so yourself [sounds like this is exactly what Roberto has succeeded in doing]. One problem is dominance - if you are just going through the motions she will notice. Another is immersion, for example if you try to reduce arousal by not looking at her face and she notices.

Dominance is an interesting one. I'm not sure about it. I don't think it directly affects your arousal or your stimulation, but rather the secondary effects of it do. I.e. when you are being more dominating you'll tend to look at her more, and you'll pound harder. Hence focusing on aspects of dominance which don't affect that - e.g. vocal, hair-pulling/manhandling etc, could be a good technique.

In my case I need to do two things. Major - reduce Arousal. Minor - boost Power with fitness training.

TL;DR A theory about giving girls orgasms better by comparing orgasm factors between man and woman, and leaning in that direction.