[bigbait]

Sometimes I need to take a break from catching and releasing new girls and just stick with a few girls for a while. (It might just be for R&R or to focus on projects). During that time I don't want any other dicks in them just because I'm not into that. I want her to be exclusive with me.

I'm not that good at doing this without expending too much time and energy - (and reducing time and energy investment is the whole point).
It works ok, but I want to come up with a recipe that is a lot less work.

I'd appreciate your advice.

This is my recipe right now:
1) Usually put in the effort to make them cum a few times each time you fuck them.
2) Cuddle them after sex.
3) Be chill to a certain extent, let them sleep over, be flexible with plans.
4) Still be very demanding in some areas so you don't seem like a pussy.
5) Introduce them to one or two friends of yours so they think you are not ashamed of them.
6) Let the girl bring some of her friends to dinner/drinks.
7) Have some dates where you invite them along to do whatever you were going to do.
8) Maintain an active social life so she does not feel like she can drop over unannounced.

Telling them outright that you don't want her to see other people doesn't work:
1) It seems very controlling
2) It makes it seem like you have no other options
3) She gets worried that you are moving too fast
4) She thinks either you're not enough of a player for her to respect you, or you're such a player that you've done this many times before

[Pontifex Maximus]

Personal techniques in testing:

- I never let anybody ( except family) stop and crash in unannounced. When people try to spend overnight to freeload they get booted. This seems to be a purely Western behavior to let people "crash for the night". By engineering a social life in hopes she takes the hint, you lose frame. Draw the line and tell her it will cost a blow.

- Let her meet your friends, not your mentor. The more token the friends are, the more effective. I wouldn't bring her to meet a RVFer.

- Check out girls in front of her, shit eating grin all over.

- Alternate after sex between leaving the room to make coffee and cuddling.

[kaotic]

(11-25-2014 02:48 PM)bigbait Wrote:  

During that time I don't want any other dicks in them just because I'm not into that. I want her to be exclusive with me.

You won't be her first dick and won't be her last one (usually).

The one who wants a relationship more (exclusivity) always loses in the long run. The one who cares less in a relationship, has the most power.

Quote:

I'm not that good at doing this without expending too much time and energy - (and reducing time and energy investment is the whole point).
It works ok, but I want to come up with a recipe that is a lot less work.

How about just not caring whether they come and go? I understand the wants for keeping a main girl around but as Princess Leia said:

"The more you tighten your grip, Tarkin, the more star systems will slip through your fingers"

Quote:

This is my recipe right now:
1) Usually put in the effort to make them cum a few times each time you fuck them.
2) Cuddle them after sex.
3) Be chill to a certain extent, let them sleep over, be flexible with plans.
4) Still be very demanding in some areas so you don't seem like a pussy.
5) Introduce them to one or two friends of yours so they think you are not ashamed of them.
6) Let the girl bring some of her friends to dinner/drinks.
7) Have some dates where you invite them along to do whatever you were going to do.
8) Maintain an active social life so she does not feel like she can drop over unannounced.

Personally, this is ALOT of maintenance to me. This sounds like a system of dependency (or it eventually leads to it).

Quote:

Telling them outright that you don't want her to see other people doesn't work:
1) It seems very controlling
2) It makes it seem like you have no other options
3) She gets worried that you are moving too fast
4) She thinks either you're not enough of a player for her to respect you, or you're such a player that you've done this many times before

You are right about this.

I think a better way to look at this is to have such strong SMV that a girl will WANT to lock YOU down in a relationship.

My recipe to have a mini LTR or LTR:
1. Bang them as fast as possible.
2. Screen to see if they complement your life.
3. Keep gaming her, dates are fine, keep her guessing.
4. Let her ask "what are we" "are we exclusive" etc. Tell her you'll let her know and you'll do it on your own terms.
5. Never actually tell her it's official, just show it.
6. She can hang with your friends, yes, have her bring her GF's so your boys can game them and/or a threesome.
7. ALWAYS MAINTAIN YOUR FRAME, do not relent, this will keep her in check.
8. Most important: KEEP BANGING OTHER GIRLS.

[Kieran]

My personal take on all this is how to get a girl to be exclusive / make her fall in love stuff that's been popping up on the forum lately, is that it's all back to front and is the type of thing girls should be posting on women's boards, or reading in one of their magazines.

It should be her trying to please you in the bedroom, and trying to lock you down in a relationship, not the other way around (and if she isn't, then you either hold frame that you're the prize until she buys in, or you next her). Trying to do something to make her feel this way, whether it's making her cum a couple of times a week, or licking her arse-hole, is setting out on the wrong foot - where does it end?

[PrimeTime32]

"Be exclusive" Why?

[bigbait]

It sounds like I need to explain myself a bit more.

Sometimes I am stretched thin and I can not put in the effort to find new girls. During that period I usually continue whatever rotation I have until I'm have time to get to getting new girls.

I don't really want to be exclusive 1) it just annoys me if the girls see other guys, 2) I would drop the girl if I thought she was with another guy and then I have one less girl in the rotation.

[WestIndianArchie]

(11-25-2014 03:38 PM)bigbait Wrote:  

It sounds like I need to explain myself a bit more.

Sometimes I am stretched thin and I can not put in the effort to find new girls. During that period I usually continue whatever rotation I have until I'm have time to get to getting new girls.

I don't really want to be exclusive 1) it just annoys me if the girls see other guys, 2) I would drop the girl if I thought she was with another guy and then I have one less girl in the rotation.

You don't need to explain wanting to have a chick that you're fucking,not fucking other guys.

That's biology 101.

Girls and beta dudes will try and hit you with some sort of false equivalence.

Don't fall for it.

WIA

[kaotic]

(11-25-2014 03:43 PM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  

Girls and beta dudes will try and hit you with some sort of false equivalence.

Can you expand on that ? Like examples ?

[WestIndianArchie]

(11-25-2014 05:30 PM)kaotic Wrote:  

(11-25-2014 03:43 PM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  

Girls and beta dudes will try and hit you with some sort of false equivalence.

Can you expand on that ? Like examples ?

I'm not sure what can be expanded.

If you're talking to some lames about running a harem, the white knights and chicks will ask you

They say - "So do you let them date whoever they want? Are you okay with that?"
you say, "fuck no"

A lot of guys ARE NOT OKAY with their chicks taking side dick, but they are okay with fucking other chicks. (I personally do not care, because in my experience, investing more than a modicum of interest in some chick you're fucking always bites you in the ass - but maybe i'm jaded)

they say, "IT'S A DOUBLE STANDARD"
you say, "And?"

Life ain't fair.

It's especially not fair to men in the sexual realm.

Women hold the vast majority of power, and they decide everything about it. You can have sober consensual sex with a chick, and she can fabricate a story and you're up shit's creek. She can fuck you and fuck some other guy, and stick you with the bill and baby.

That's reality. It's a harsh reality. False paternity and false rape accusations are the "headline" type stories. The everyday shit like a woman's lack of honesty and respect if it goes against her concerns - that doesn't even rate. Showing cleavage when she wants to get something...

The handful of times, 1 guy gets even the slightest bit of advantage over a chick, suddenly the world's coming to an end. They brought the big guns out against Top hats and feather boas.

The feminine imperative's reaction to any sort of gain is very akin to one black guy getting a job, or one chick getting into a full college class - the powerful are INCENSED when they don't get what they're ENTITLED TO - OMG, IT'S SO UNFAIR, THEY'RE OUTTA BE A LAW, I'M CALLING THE COPS/MY CONGRESSMAN.

That is how power reacts. There is no sharing of power.

If life was fair, you'd already be married to that cute girl from the 4th grade because you killed that beetle that was threatening her.

But it's not.

The sooner people realize that, the better off they are.

WIA

[kaotic]

I've got nothing else to say, you nailed what I was thinking.

I wish I could +1 rep you again man. Always insightful.

[YossariansRight]

(11-25-2014 06:00 PM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  

(11-25-2014 05:30 PM)kaotic Wrote:  

(11-25-2014 03:43 PM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  

Girls and beta dudes will try and hit you with some sort of false equivalence.

Can you expand on that ? Like examples ?

I'm not sure what can be expanded.

If you're talking to some lames about running a harem, the white knights and chicks will ask you

They say - "So do you let them date whoever they want? Are you okay with that?"
you say, "fuck no"

A lot of guys ARE NOT OKAY with their chicks taking side dick, but they are okay with fucking other chicks. (I personally do not care, because in my experience, investing more than a modicum of interest in some chick you're fucking always bites you in the ass - but maybe i'm jaded)

they say, "IT'S A DOUBLE STANDARD"
you say, "And?"

Life ain't fair.

It's especially not fair to men in the sexual realm.

Women hold the vast majority of power, and they decide everything about it. You can have sober consensual sex with a chick, and she can fabricate a story and you're up shit's creek. She can fuck you and fuck some other guy, and stick you with the bill and baby.

That's reality. It's a harsh reality. False paternity and false rape accusations are the "headline" type stories. The everyday shit like a woman's lack of honesty and respect if it goes against her concerns - that doesn't even rate. Showing cleavage when she wants to get something...

The handful of times, 1 guy gets even the slightest bit of advantage over a chick, suddenly the world's coming to an end. They brought the big guns out against Top hats and feather boas.

The feminine imperative's reaction to any sort of gain is very akin to one black guy getting a job, or one chick getting into a full college class - the powerful are INCENSED when they don't get what they're ENTITLED TO - OMG, IT'S SO UNFAIR, THEY'RE OUTTA BE A LAW, I'M CALLING THE COPS/MY CONGRESSMAN.

That is how power reacts. There is no sharing of power.

If life was fair, you'd already be married to that cute girl from the 4th grade because you killed that beetle that was threatening her.

But it's not.

The sooner people realize that, the better off they are.

WIA

That's some true, higher level thinking right there.

[Dalaran1991]

"If life was fair, you'd already be married to that cute girl from the 4th grade because you killed that beetle that was threatening her.

But it's not.

The sooner people realize that, the better off they are.
"

I'm printing this off and putting it on my wall.

[iknowexactly]

(11-25-2014 07:04 PM)Dalaran1991 Wrote:  

"If life was fair, you'd already be married to that cute girl from the 4th grade because you killed that beetle that was threatening her.

But it's not.

The sooner people realize that, the better off they are.
"

I'm printing this off and putting it on my wall.

WIA strikes again, brilliant pointing out of a problem I didn't even see-- the absurd claim that sexually attractive women deserve some kind of deference rather than something like alarmed suspicion, or bemused skepticism. lolzlz.

I can only rep once..