http://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/parenti...7117988524
Preliminary background notes, for context:
- This is an article about a minor Australian female pop singer (Ricki-Lee Coultier) being lectured by an even more minor Australian celebrity about the perils of the "you can have it all" mindset. Your mileage about its applicability outside Australia or significance may therefore vary.
- Nonetheless the commentary is still enlightening and continuing confirmation of the theory that a pretty damn significant fraction of Wall to post-Wall women are regretting feminism - even if the F word is never spoken once.
- Also interesting because the age range in question is getting younger. Traditionally buyer's regret for feminism with women seems to kick in or get wailed about when the woman is in the fiftysomething range. This celebirty's age is not known precisely, but a quick Internet search indicates it's just on 41. My guess it's shortly post-the first failed round of IVF.
So far, so good: standard wail of the dying uterus here.
This is an interesting variation on the standard wail since the idea of having kids and not doing what her parents did -- i.e. raising them as a stay-at-home mother -- just does not seem to occur to either of these women. It's as if, having never been given the correct code for bringing up kids by their parents, they think there is no way they can ever do it and so they resolve to never even try. Given she's 41 or so, this would put her upbringing as a teenager around the late eighties, early nineties -- smack bang in feminism's most dominant period.
Note also that the author of the article is probably the very definition of a feminist timewaster. Got kicked out of high school, became dux of another school, and then literally ran off to join the circus. Can read most of her life story here, including a discussion of the (very masculine) Russian circus she was in and her regret over a tattoo she got at 36: http://www.illawarramercury.com.au/story...urning-40/
So therefore a late realiser of the Wall's existence and ignorant as fuck of her own biology.
Too bad according to studies I've seen cited here that it's not the age of the egg that influences the incidence of genetic disorders, it's the age of the mother. Until they find a proper fountain of youth there simply is no cheating nature on this, though it's going to be funny watching her figure that shit out.
Try practically impossible absent dropping serious cash, and even then practically impossible. The conversation between a 30 year old friend of mine and her obstetrician went something like this:
"So I'm 30, when should I think about having kids--"
"Now."
"...don't I have a couple of years--"
"No. Now. Have them now. Your chances of successfully conceiving and carrying a child to full term drop by about 25% for every year that passes from right now."
Although this next bit...
The bolded bit is interesting since as far as I can remember that's the first time anyone in public life has blatantly stated that celebrities having kids after 40 is more like the title sequence of The Six Million Dollar Man than a natural process of fertility. That most celebrities doing this try to pass it off as their own natural fertility only illustrates the illusion of public life.
For your consideration, gentlemen. Oh, and WYB?
Preliminary background notes, for context:
- This is an article about a minor Australian female pop singer (Ricki-Lee Coultier) being lectured by an even more minor Australian celebrity about the perils of the "you can have it all" mindset. Your mileage about its applicability outside Australia or significance may therefore vary.
- Nonetheless the commentary is still enlightening and continuing confirmation of the theory that a pretty damn significant fraction of Wall to post-Wall women are regretting feminism - even if the F word is never spoken once.
- Also interesting because the age range in question is getting younger. Traditionally buyer's regret for feminism with women seems to kick in or get wailed about when the woman is in the fiftysomething range. This celebirty's age is not known precisely, but a quick Internet search indicates it's just on 41. My guess it's shortly post-the first failed round of IVF.
Quote:Quote:
Rather, this is a warning of sorts, a “please reconsider” perhaps, to the thousands of 20-somethings who decide they don’t want kids but may change their mind and find it is too late down the track.
That’s the position I’m in.
Ricki-Lee does a lot for young women.
She is a positive role model to many and her social media is full of strong vibes promoting a healthy body and healthy lifestyle.
So far, so good: standard wail of the dying uterus here.
Quote:Quote:
But last week, Confidential’s story from a Ricki-Lee radio interview sent me into a deja-vu spin out.
She said she and her partner don’t want to have kids.
She’s said she isn’t keen on being a mum because she doesn’t want them to have the same upbringing she endured with a young mother whofarmed her out (her words) to whoever could look after her while she lived the life of an 18-year old.
The deja vu stuff starts but doesn’t end there for me.
I had a similar childhood.
I too was farmed around to family — to grandparents and nanny’s — while my parents lived the dream life on the social scene. There was a time I too wasn’t that keen to procreate for fear of repeating my parents’ history.
This is an interesting variation on the standard wail since the idea of having kids and not doing what her parents did -- i.e. raising them as a stay-at-home mother -- just does not seem to occur to either of these women. It's as if, having never been given the correct code for bringing up kids by their parents, they think there is no way they can ever do it and so they resolve to never even try. Given she's 41 or so, this would put her upbringing as a teenager around the late eighties, early nineties -- smack bang in feminism's most dominant period.
Note also that the author of the article is probably the very definition of a feminist timewaster. Got kicked out of high school, became dux of another school, and then literally ran off to join the circus. Can read most of her life story here, including a discussion of the (very masculine) Russian circus she was in and her regret over a tattoo she got at 36: http://www.illawarramercury.com.au/story...urning-40/
Quote:Quote:
BUT ... I changed my mind.
Ricki-Lee has said: “You never know, I might turn 40 and go, ‘come on let’s pop one out’.”
It doesn’t work that way, trust me.
At 28, I travelled the world interviewing the biggest-name stars — from Madonna to Richard Branson. I was interviewed for magazines and they would always ask when I was going to have kids.
I would get cranky and flustered. I’d say, “maybe never”.
So therefore a late realiser of the Wall's existence and ignorant as fuck of her own biology.
Quote:Quote:
A decade later I changed my mind and it’s been a long and hard road since. I’ve been through a number of failed IVF rounds and I’m still going.
I won’t give up yet.
I’ve had two miscarriages and put on 12kg from the hormones they’ve pumped into me. I’m begging Ricki-Lee — I wish I had of thought about this more at her age.
My advice?
Freeze your eggs now Ricki-Lee, while you can.
Technology these days is amazing and the chance of embryo survival is much better than it used to be.
Too bad according to studies I've seen cited here that it's not the age of the egg that influences the incidence of genetic disorders, it's the age of the mother. Until they find a proper fountain of youth there simply is no cheating nature on this, though it's going to be funny watching her figure that shit out.
Quote:Quote:
I was cocky and thought I had all the time in the world.
The sad reality of women’s fertility is that your clock is ticking and “popping out” a baby at 40 isn’t that easy.
Try practically impossible absent dropping serious cash, and even then practically impossible. The conversation between a 30 year old friend of mine and her obstetrician went something like this:
"So I'm 30, when should I think about having kids--"
"Now."
"...don't I have a couple of years--"
"No. Now. Have them now. Your chances of successfully conceiving and carrying a child to full term drop by about 25% for every year that passes from right now."
Although this next bit...
Quote:Quote:
It’s more common than ever for celebrities to have babies later. But when they do interviews, rarely do they mention it was an “assisted” pregnancy, or, in Sonia Kruger’s case, it was a donated egg.
Please ladies, make sure you do your research. I’m sure anyone going through IVF rounds at my age would agree. It isn’t a walk in the park.
The bolded bit is interesting since as far as I can remember that's the first time anyone in public life has blatantly stated that celebrities having kids after 40 is more like the title sequence of The Six Million Dollar Man than a natural process of fertility. That most celebrities doing this try to pass it off as their own natural fertility only illustrates the illusion of public life.
For your consideration, gentlemen. Oh, and WYB?
Remissas, discite, vivet.
God save us from people who mean well. -storm
