[jariel]

Women hold the title for tellers of half-truths. I think we can all agree that "Just be yourself" is the worst advice that a woman can give to a man, mostly because what if being yourself isn't what she wants, because as you are, she doesn't want you.

With that being said, I ask you to think about "Just be yourself", the remixed version. You actually should just be yourself, but you should be the best version of whoever it is that you are.

Think about who you are, there's no doubt in my mind, you have some good qualities. You actually could bring value to some woman's life. Now think about what you would like to improve upon. When you can add on to your foundation, you're on your way to being the best you that you can be.

When you present yourself to women, stop trying to be some sort of character, like the perfect guy who appears in some rom-com. You know that guy, he's jacked, he's handsome -- no homo -- he has money, status, an interesting lifestyle, he's just the coolest of cool motherfuckers who has all of the desirable traits you've been programmed to believe that you need to possess just to get some ass.

Look, we're not all going to be able to get dimes, we're not all going to be cool motherfuckers, on the surface. Even if we can get into character and snatch one, getting her is one thing, keeping her around is a whole different animal, and don't tell me you just want to one night stand a dime -- real dimes are worth the time, you can do real shit with a dime.

A lot of guys who learn game will succumb to their natural failings after a certain period of time, just like women do. Everyone tries to put their best foot forward at the beginning of the interaction, and then it's a race to see who stops trying first.

This is simply because again, you're not improving who you already are, you're just feigning to be someone entirely different, you're just an actor, do you think you're going to be able to play a role and read from scripts forever?

To quote Timbaland, "that shit ain't gonna work".

I implore you to be the best you that you can be, and then put that man on display for the women you encounter, either they're going to be down or they're not. At the end of the day, you can be the coolest dude, and you can like her more than anyone else ever has, but that doesn't mean anything, she still may not want you for any reason, even one that may have nothing to do with you.

So next time you hear someone, somewhere say "Just be yourself", understand what it really means, you'll find yourself winning more than you are losing, and you'll be happier with who you are as a man.

In the long run, self-acceptance is more valuable than another's validation because you're always going to have to love, trust, and believe in yourself, while she, whoever she may be, is more likely than not just passing through anyway.

[Suave]

This is my first post. No way better way to start of with than compliment the possibly most important piece of advice available "Be yourself". Great post my friend.

To be honest, its very tempting to act like a guy who just swoops women of their feet. Indirectly though, that tells me a person is insecure about himself. Just started to game and out of all the things I need to learn, I reckon this might be the most important.

[SydneyD]

There are 2 dialectically opposing schools of thought concerning the 'Self' of a man when it comes to interactions with women. One school of thought advocates that one must find ways to keep a women entertained regardless of the differences in character between you and her and this 'entertainment' will be used to build attraction. The other, which is being propounded by Jariel, is to be the best possible version of yourself which will help your interactions with women become more 'natural'.

i.e, this is a question of Clown Game vs. Being Yourself.

Both forms of game have their pros and cons. In clown game, one steps out of his comfort zone and does all he can to build attraction even if he finds the character of the women to be terribly flawed and sharing no similarity to his own. However the clown will continue to game regardless and he bears with this so he can eventually get the notch that his penis desires.

Clown game is however also flawed. Eventually you will get tired of Clowning and you will reveal your true self the woman. If she detests this side of your character she may leave you thus Clown Game is best for stacking up notches but it won't help you keep a girl around for long.

'Being Yourself' overcomes this problem since the target of your game is aware of who you 'really' are from the get-go and thus she will know what to expect from you which makes her more likely to stick around in an LTR.

However being yourself may possibly reduce the number of notches you could attain since this form game does not provide a remedy for the situation where the target of your game does not like who you 'really' are.

Thus in conclusion:
- Clown Game is best for getting notches
- Being the best version of yourself is best for keeping women around.


I just wanted to let Suave know about these different forms of game before he gets too comfortable. Mix it up

[Phoenix]

Nope.

How do you ascertain 'best'? How do you determine what is 'yourself', and the 'best version'?

Example: basement dwelling WoW gamer, following this philosophy, would just focus harder on his gaming.

'Best' is signaled by others, and especially by 'winners'. Observing successful men, and copying the traits that make them successful to the extent you can, is wise.

'Just be yourself' remains terrible advice.

[Travesty]

I would have thought the more natural and better self I am I would have to mow through less chicks as I am more sure of myself and what value I offer.

Nope. The better I become my standards and respect myself rise and I push attractive girls to the side faster and faster that I know don't want what I'm really selling. They want a neverending magic show.

A 7.5 with a partially incompatible personality (or they are just dull) would make me tell myself "hey she's hot enough just work her for the sex".

Now I am more easy on just dropping the chick from the get go.

You gain enough reference experiences with attractive chicks that not like just your game but actually like you (your non-gaming default effortlessly ingrained persona) that the loss in pleasure to game an attractive chick only lukewarm on the true you becomes too much work.