[lampshade]

Basically if you could sit down with a girl before getting into an LTR with her and give her a list of rules she has to follow, what would you put on the list, why, and how would you enforce it?

These may be explicit rules you tell her like:
"You have to introduce me as your boyfriend"
"If we're at a club with a strict door policy, and the bouncer won't let me in, refuse to go into the club without me"

Or implicit ones like:
Make sure she knows you have options, don't take shit, and that you will bounce if she doesn't treat you with respect. (i.e. dread game, etc.)

If anyone has any experience dealing with dating girls who have a large social circle of their own (so there's more chance of people not knowing you guys are dating and they overstep their bounds, she has to manipulate/flirt with key dudes at the club to get access, etc.), I could use your advice on basic ground rules here. Obviously, these rules should not make her feel like you're restricting her too much, etc.

Thanks in advance if anyone can drop any info.

[Old Fritz]

If you are in any relationship with a woman I must stress how it is important to lay the boundaries out. People just don't do this anymore. Don't command though her because she may start bitching about how you're controlling. Do tell her what you will and will not tolerate. Some of this includes acknowledging you are in a relationship.

I've said these things before to various women

> Act flaky or try to disrespect me in public and we are done
> If you like partying, clubbing, or drinking that is okay. Just understand that I won't take you seriously at all.
> Yes I just want sex. If you don't want to give it I'll find someone else <-- Said this to a fuck buddy.

[l.smetana]

If you need to give girl list what she can do and how to do, do you really want LTR with her?

[Ensam]

I think it's best just to address behavior when it comes up. The most valuable thing you can give a girl is your time and attention. When she does something you don't like calmly take it away (if you're a drama queen about it you'll defeat the purpose). She'll either know right away what she did wrong or come back in a few days asking what she did and then you can calmly tell her.

[MY DETROIT PLAYAS]

(08-31-2014 06:01 PM)l.smetana Wrote:  

If you need to give girl list what she can do and how to do, do you really want LTR with her?

It's not so much that though

It's more like setting boundaries. Unfortunately, because of outside influences before you, some women have an incorrect idea of what a LTR really is.

Essentially, what you are doing is filtering and qualifying at the same damn time

As a ever-improving, well-rounded guy who is equipped to bring joy, happiness and stability into her life you have certain standards that you are not willing to forgo just to say you have a gf. That's for those naive types who are looking for someone to "complete him".

No, quite to the contrary...I am looking for someone to "complement" me. That will take more than just a pretty smile and a skewed idea of what it means to bring something to the table.

If she is good with what I expect, and what she counters with is in line with my worldview, then we have what we call potential.

She now knows what to expect, and there are no surprises that will upset the apple cart (hopefully).

The worst feeling is getting into a LTR having not dotted your "I's" and crossed your "T's"

[Dalaran1991]

IMO boundaries are much better set by action or attitude rather than verbal. Action > word. Cliché but true.

Thing is, if you verbalize your rules then you engage her "empowerment" hamster. Words, unless charged with wrath and accompanied with immediate punishment, directly violate her feminist-indoctrinated hamster. She will think you are trying to control her, her cunt attitude surfaces, and you will get down to a verbal argument from which theres no winning.

If, on the other hand, she comes back from a girls night out drunk and you smell something wrong, you get mad, hitting the wall and slamming the door as you leave, it will both feed her thirst for drama and poses a much better threat on her. Dont ask me why but this forum has proven that chicks got wet when seeing their men furious.

Now theres no need to make things violent, but it helps when necessary. If she pulls out her phone while out and about with you, take it from her hand or drop it in your drink glass. The latter was actually done by my professor who got a no-cell phone policy in his class. Works better than any word.

Ideally if you ve been doing things right she should always be on edge trying to please you and not fucking up without you having to reinforce anything. As Foucault said, "the best slave is the one who subjects himself to slavery voluntarily" read: all blue pill guys. Girls never have to ask these guys for anything and still they shower them with gifts and shit trying to please them.

[Texas_Tryhard]

The things described in the OP sound like a laundry list of thirst. The explicit ones are terrible. I think in the right situations Old Fritz's comments are on point, but you're going to seem like a jealous idiot listing out all the things your girlfriend can't do with other guys. If you're that worried about her when she's not under your direct supervision, then maybe she's not a good girl to be turning into a LTR, or maybe you haven't yet hit the point in your game career where your abundance mentality projects the vibe that if she fucks up in your eyes you'll bounce.

Either way, lists of job requirements are the fastest way to dry up a vagina. You can't negotiate loyalty.