rooshvforum.network is a fully functional forum: you can search, register, post new threads etc...
Old accounts are inaccessible: register a new one, or recover it when possible. x


Online dating: Let them come to you.
#1

Online dating: Let them come to you.

For the last few years I've been using free dating sites on a somewhat regular basis, in between some medium-term relationships. The sites I use are POF, OkCupid, and Craigslist.

I've banged about a dozen girls from these sites during that time, and in almost every instance the girl contacted me first or responded to my ad.

For reference, I'm an average looking, mid 30s white guy in the suburbs of Los Angeles. Of those dozen girls, 2 were genuine head turners. If you saw them on the street, you'd think she was attractive and turn back to stare at her ass. But the rest were just average-looking girls who were willing to go to bed pretty quickly, which is all I'm really interested in. They weren't fat or ugly (I'd rather jack off), just average.

I've found that I can spend hours on these sites, browsing for girls, checking out my matches, and crafting witty personalized responses to the girls I like, but then never receive a single response back. Or maybe I'll get back a one-line response that she never follows through with.

So I've decided that it's best, in terms of time and results, to just craft a quality profile with some good pictures, and then sit back and wait for them to come to me. The only thing I need to do is login once a day so that I appear on the top of their search list. Also, it helps to spend a few minutes rapidly clicking through a bunch of their profiles, because sometimes a girl will contact you because she sees you on her visitors list. But then do nothing else, and don't bother sending them messages unless they contact you first. It's just a waste of time.

I'm often shocked at how aggressive these girls can be once they decide they like you.
Reply
#2

Online dating: Let them come to you.

You are right. We have discussed this here before. It is a waste of time persueing women online. However having a quality profile up for just passive game is like getting residual checks in the mail. If they contact you first and are game to meet, you will more than likely bang soon. I had the really cute ex-Airforce chic hit me up a day ago. We met last night and she basicly jumped on me later[Image: whip.gif] That is how it usually works. I guess it is some truth to the fact that women know they want to bang you pretty soon after meeting or seeing you.
Reply
#3

Online dating: Let them come to you.

Quote:Quote:

For reference, I'm an average looking, mid 30s white guy in the suburbs of Los Angeles.

And I'm an average looking mid 30s black guy in the surburbs of Los Angeles. [Image: biggrin.gif]

I haven't done the online thing in probably 5 years, but I concur. I only went on one date with a girl who I contacted first and even then I didn't get past the first date. All the rest were because she contacted me first.
Reply
#4

Online dating: Let them come to you.

With POF, you can see your "visitors" and they are usually more likely to respond well. Either way, the cool thing about POF, I've found, is that once you find your groove, things start working pretty well [Image: smile.gif]
Reply
#5

Online dating: Let them come to you.

Interesting strategy... I think I might have to test it out... It does make a lot of sense.
Reply
#6

Online dating: Let them come to you.

Quote: (02-17-2011 01:48 PM)BR88 Wrote:  

I've found that I can spend hours on these sites, browsing for girls, checking out my matches, and crafting witty personalized responses to the girls I like, but then never receive a single response back.

Of course. There are two things. First, this comes as "trying too hard" in the online game. Second, you spend your time doing the screening through all the girls, and most of them would screen you out.

The way I'd do it is to create a simple message which should attract the girls to your profile. The goal of the message should be to let them to check your profile. Something like "hey, I just added the latest cool pics from Zimbabwe, check them" would not require any effort, and could be mass-mailed easily.
Reply
#7

Online dating: Let them come to you.

Quote: (02-17-2011 07:11 PM)oldnemesis Wrote:  

Quote: (02-17-2011 01:48 PM)BR88 Wrote:  

I've found that I can spend hours on these sites, browsing for girls, checking out my matches, and crafting witty personalized responses to the girls I like, but then never receive a single response back.

Of course. There are two things. First, this comes as "trying too hard" in the online game. Second, you spend your time doing the screening through all the girls, and most of them would screen you out.

The way I'd do it is to create a simple message which should attract the girls to your profile. The goal of the message should be to let them to check your profile. Something like "hey, I just added the latest cool pics from Zimbabwe, check them" would not require any effort, and could be mass-mailed easily.

Yeah, I've been migrating my strategy to do some of this as well. Sometimes I'll see a girl who I cannot pass up, so I'll send her a Wink with a very quick message, and mention something from her profile that we have in common (even if I have to lie). Something like that doesn't take much time.

The problem is that I think many girls are turned off by a guy who just sends over a quick one-liner message, and when she sees that I didn't invest anything in messaging her, she will immediately write me off. Especially since the attractive girls are inundated with short messages all day long.

But I don't want to overthink this, and online game should always be secondary to doing actual approaches in person.
Reply
#8

Online dating: Let them come to you.

i love POF! i get about 2 messages a day on that thing!
Reply
#9

Online dating: Let them come to you.

I just signed up for that site a week ago and I have to agree. Out of 20 sent messages nobody answered. The one girl im talking to ad me to her favorites and I took it from there. I even started to message girls way bellow my standerd aka fat chicks and still no reply. I agree its good as a passive thing to do but I cant see myself investing anymore time
Reply
#10

Online dating: Let them come to you.

Just facebook guys!!!
:-))
Reply
#11

Online dating: Let them come to you.

Quote: (02-18-2011 10:15 AM)Pacman Wrote:  

Just facebook guys!!!
:-))
Break down how you use facebook? I have found people to be more private about that. I could see if you are going to another country and just asking girls random travel questions and then go from their. However, I feel like people guard their facebook because technically it isn't a dating site. I guard mine because too much drama could be caused by multiple girls.
Reply
#12

Online dating: Let them come to you.

Quote: (02-18-2011 03:34 AM)BazzookaBalls Wrote:  

I just signed up for that site a week ago and I have to agree. Out of 20 sent messages nobody answered. The one girl im talking to ad me to her favorites and I took it from there. I even started to message girls way bellow my standerd aka fat chicks and still no reply. I agree its good as a passive thing to do but I cant see myself investing anymore time

I agree. My fam told me that women online are usually either fat or have serious baggage. And he is at a point where it's too much hassle dealing with women on that level.

I usually get contact initiated by fat chix. I am partial to a thick chick but these days, everyone tries to stretch that terminology and after DR, I'd rather sleep than waste my energy trying to knock an orgasm out of a big bird.

I do the online thing when it's really cold here and it's not worth going out but I'm trying to phase that out.

I think the internet creates bad habits and most of the women online (in the GTA anyway) have social setbacks that really take a lot from you.

I don't do facebook, maybe that's different but fcuk it.

OUR NEW BLOG!

http://repstylez.com

My NEW TRAVEL E-BOOK - DOMINICAN REPUBLIC - A RED CARPET AFFAIR

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00K53LVR8

Love 'em or leave 'em but we can't live without lizardsssss..

An Ode To Lizards
Reply
#13

Online dating: Let them come to you.

Quote: (02-18-2011 11:21 AM)Moma Wrote:  

I agree. My fam told me that women online are usually either fat or have serious baggage. And he is at a point where it's too much hassle dealing with women on that level.

That's what I tend to believe which is why I won't bother trying to pick up online. There will of course be exceptions to every rule but by and large there is something "wrong" with online chicks. My ex in an attempt to show me how many options she had just for kicks changed her facebook profile to say she was single and within a few hours had a few dozen hit ons, and she had a closed profile these were "friends" just waiting in the weeds lol. Take that to a dating site and the numbers would just jump exponentially. Problem is too many guys who in the real world have no game and are no competition are online cassanovas or they think they are and have to hit on everything with a pulse. The result the hot think they're supermodels, the average think they're hot and the unfuckable think they're in play. A girl who in real life would give you all the time in the day online thinks I can do better. Real life will put them back in their place but as long as theyre treated like that online they have a false sense of worth. Couple that with damaged, full of baggage, and you have girls that aren't worth the work. It works in reverse for guys, it would lower our sense of worth. like the guy who said he even moved on to fat chicks and not a bite...in the real world a twinkie and chubs is falling your around like a lost puppy. Playing online will just mess up your game, and can only hurt that confidence, can't be bothered.
Reply
#14

Online dating: Let them come to you.

Quote: (02-18-2011 02:00 PM)mikeymike Wrote:  

That's what I tend to believe which is why I won't bother trying to pick up online. There will of course be exceptions to every rule but by and large there is something "wrong" with online chicks. My ex in an attempt to show me how many options she had just for kicks changed her facebook profile to say she was single and within a few hours had a few dozen hit ons, and she had a closed profile these were "friends" just waiting in the weeds lol.

I know a girl on my facebook I'm friends with. She's not even all that, maybe a 7 tops on a good day. She posted an update one day along the lines of "why do jeans always make my ass look big?" I replied, "you say that like it's a bad thing." She then said, "you're the first guy to reply on facebook, all the others just texted me." Facebook is as big a cockfest as any with a bunch of guys waiting to pounce on their female "friends" at a second's notice. Another thing that's pathetic is that this girl has had guys literally stalking her, and she's only about a 6. The amount of attention even an average girl gets so inflates their value that it's ridiculous.
Reply
#15

Online dating: Let them come to you.

Facebook is not good for picking up girls. Its pretty gay actually. I finally made one a couple of months ago but don't even mess with it.

What's POF? Never heard of ok cupid. I met some hoe last week on cpixel, picked her up earlier today for the first time and fucked her at my place within 15 minutes. She was maybe a 6 and that's being nice. Cpixel is good if you're in your early 20s since its younger sluts.

I just mess around with that on my phone when I'm bored and and not doing anything at all.
Reply
#16

Online dating: Let them come to you.

Had to start a pof account after reading this thread, just wondering what the trick is with the about me section? Haven't got any messages yet but I just started it yesterday. I've been going through other guys profiles and 99% of them are corny as hell. What works for everyone else?

btw, between myspace and facebook I've banged about 8 chicks since 2007. Could have gotten more bangs but I try to stay away from the fuglies and crazies. But, that shit is gold if you know how to use it.
Reply
#17

Online dating: Let them come to you.

Update on the last post: I'm getting on average 2 or 3 messages a day in the Miami area. Ever since I stated in the about me section that I don't message anyone because of the overwhelming amount of messages in an average girls message box. They've been blowing my shit up like I'm cake to a fat kid. I'm also new to the area so I think that they're thinking they can bring me under their wing and keep me caged in. Silly bitches. Great tool to use to get the bitches wet before they meet you. Think of it as your income, the more time and thought you put in the more passive pussy you recieve.
Reply
#18

Online dating: Let them come to you.

What is POF? I might have to look into it once I figure out what it is. Anyone else have experience with it?
Reply
#19

Online dating: Let them come to you.

I've always been hesitant to try online dating but this sounds like the way to do it.

Set up an attractive profile, maintain it a little, and only pursue girls who contact you first. Low maintenance macking. I like it.

Good looking guys have the advantage here as always. Thats life though.

My friends who do well online have taught me that its all about "picture selection". Don't be afraid to "stage" some pictures if you don't have any good ones of yourself. ha. And learn how to "crop" the pictures to make them more attractive and mysterious. "Picture Selection" is an art just like your style of dress or something. You gotta only have pictures of yourself looking handsome, masculine, and mysterious etc. If your a "beta", you will usually look like one in most of your pictures.
Reply
#20

Online dating: Let them come to you.

@Houston Plentyoffish.com
Being from Houston I'm sure you've heard of cpixel.com, it's kind of like that without the corny ass ebonics. It's a cheap mans version of match.com.
Reply
#21

Online dating: Let them come to you.

Ahhh plenty of fish. So what should I in my profile "about me" section for all y'all internet playas?

Lol I've banged about 10 hoes from cpixel.com but I'm done with ghetto girls for now
Reply
#22

Online dating: Let them come to you.

Just made a profile but still trying to finalize my About Me section...
Reply
#23

Online dating: Let them come to you.

Be honest, but exaggerate a little and throw in a some humor. You'll be set. Make it sound like you're a good catch and put yourself ahead of the pack. Take your time on it because your about me section can make you or break you in their eyes. For example, you can be an average joe lookin' cat, but if your about me is carefully thought out with good grammar, and leaves them wanting more then they'll send you a message, and there's your foot in the door. Seem interesting, bitches don't want a bland man that blends in with the rest of the POF profiles. Some of these cats are corny as hell on POF. You're already doing better than 50% of them, put yourself in the upper echelon.
Reply
#24

Online dating: Let them come to you.

I'm going have to think hard about this section. It seems like there's a lot of busy girls on there in school and working. I'm talking to some ghetto asian girl on there....never been with an asian so I might play along to capture the flag.
Reply


Forum Jump:


Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)