[steezy]

So, I was reading Roosh's posts on books since I was looking for some new books to read, and I saw that he recommended How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie. A number of other people I have talked to in person, as well as other blogs I follow that are PickUp related have said that this book is great.

So, I bought the book and am reading it. But right now, I don't see how this can apply to pick up. For example, Principle #1 is Don't criticize, condemn, or complain. That whole chapter's message was, when angry, frustrated, etc., to take a step back and look upon the situation from the other person's POV, and not, under any circumstances, to criticize them.

How is that gonna help your game? I know that you don't want to complain around girls, and you shouldn't throw out insults all the time, but at the same time, shouldn't you not bite your tongue? I'm just really confused on how to apply this to pick up. I understand trying to make friends, but pick up, not so much.

So, can someone explain to me how this book is related to game? Or what perspective I should read it from in order to improve my game?

Thanks

[Moma]

(12-28-2010 12:33 AM)steezy Wrote:  

So, I was reading Roosh's posts on books since I was looking for some new books to read, and I saw that he recommended How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie. A number of other people I have talked to in person, as well as other blogs I follow that are PickUp related have said that this book is great.

So, I bought the book and am reading it. But right now, I don't see how this can apply to pick up. For example, Principle #1 is Don't criticize, condemn, or complain. That whole chapter's message was, when angry, frustrated, etc., to take a step back and look upon the situation from the other person's POV, and not, under any circumstances, to criticize them.

How is that gonna help your game? I know that you don't want to complain around girls, and you shouldn't throw out insults all the time, but at the same time, shouldn't you not bite your tongue? I'm just really confused on how to apply this to pick up. I understand trying to make friends, but pick up, not so much.

So, can someone explain to me how this book is related to game? Or what perspective I should read it from in order to improve my game?

Thanks

The best gamers know how to influence women and how to strike the desired chords so that the women will do what they want (which is to fcuk).
A good PUA is akin to a salesman, he has to demonstrate the value of sexual encounters with himself to his target so that she may lie with him in the confidence or assurance that she has made a good decision.

I try to use my assets to strike a chord of sexual prowess in the women I desire. I encourage them to feel my body or some other physical part so it triggers off the fantasy of sex in their heads.

I believe a lot of FDL's that I have had (FDL = First Date Lays) has been because I struck the appropriate chord with the woman.
In many cases, I have delivered worn a vest demonstrating my physique etc.
Suddenly once the woman has realised that, she has usually 'allowed' the petting to escalate into something a lot more 'penetrative'.

By understanding how to influence people and understanding psychology, you will be able to pique women's sexual interest in you and making the chances of you pumping them a lot higher.

I hope that makes sense.

[raliv]

I have been meaning to read this book for quite some time. The best player I personally know recommended the book to me. Lots of game gurus like it so it can't be bad.

[phoenix abroad]

(12-28-2010 12:33 AM)steezy Wrote:  

So, I was reading Roosh's posts on books since I was looking for some new books to read, and I saw that he recommended How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie. A number of other people I have talked to in person, as well as other blogs I follow that are PickUp related have said that this book is great.

So, I bought the book and am reading it. But right now, I don't see how this can apply to pick up. For example, Principle #1 is Don't criticize, condemn, or complain. That whole chapter's message was, when angry, frustrated, etc., to take a step back and look upon the situation from the other person's POV, and not, under any circumstances, to criticize them.

How is that gonna help your game? I know that you don't want to complain around girls, and you shouldn't throw out insults all the time, but at the same time, shouldn't you not bite your tongue? I'm just really confused on how to apply this to pick up. I understand trying to make friends, but pick up, not so much.

So, can someone explain to me how this book is related to game? Or what perspective I should read it from in order to improve my game?

Thanks

I just read the book a few weeks ago and I have to agree with your points. It is a GREAT book for interpersonal relations, but you have to make some adjustments for game.

The book shows how to make friends, not lovers. If your goal is to turn a women into a lover you have to be careful that you aren't supplicating by agreeing with everything she says.

There are some very useful parts like trying to see things from the girl's point of view and especially the part about getting the girl talking about herself and qualifying to you.

[ElJefe]

Don't criticize, condemn or complain is outstanding advice any day of the week. Start doing any of those three, and watch your friendships evaporate and popularity decrease. Keep in mind: criticizing is NOT teasing a girl (negging, as some would say). Another assumption of the book is that you are relatively equal or lower status to those with whom you're interacting. If you are very high status to another person, in other words, the leader (as it ought to be in an LTR), you can criticize and it can yield "positive" results.

Make your friends laugh and let them associate good memories with you, and see your popularity increase. In the final analysis, all HAPPY relationships with others depend upon how you make them feel - in this respect women have a natural talent. Men take the logical approach "if what I say is true, why is it hurting my friendships". This ignores the reality of emotions and how they affect your perception.

I've lost my copy, but I am going to re-read that book alongside Day Bang, Bang, Double Your Dating (still a classic) and that other shit, because DC was right all along. How to Win Friends and Influence People is basically about how to be a cool guy - just transpose it from the social norms of the 1930's to today.

[kanevast]

The message was to be as fluid as possible with people.

So every time you're in a situation think about how you can get along with them the best and apply that - easier said than done, you'll get better at it the more you think about it and try to do it.

[CJ]

I've read it, allow me to assist:

(12-28-2010 12:33 AM)steezy Wrote:  

Principle #1 is Don't criticize, condemn, or complain. That whole chapter's message was, when angry, frustrated, etc.,

Do you know how much women love to bitch? A lot or we wouldn't call them bitches! (Ha, ha, I couldn't resist) Do you know how much they like listening to you bitch? The answer is not at all, so don't do it, simple as that. If you're a positive person, people want to be around you... trust me.

Quote:

to take a step back and look upon the situation from the other person's POV

This is helpful on multiple levels, if you're quick and/or experienced enough you can get in her head. Try to think how she is thinking, and then make moves accordingly to get in her pants. Don't ever hastily overreact irrationally.

Quote:

shouldn't you not bite your tongue?

Of course you shouldn't completely filter yourself, but try to keep the convo more light and flirtatious than aggressive and confrontational, simple, right?

Above all else, be genuine about your actions, don't try to fake being nice, cool, easy-going, etc. I mean you can fake the little stuff til you become it, but really put the effort into being a mellow, interesting dude and you'll become a pussy magnet.

Hope that helps, if you have any other specific questions I'll be happy to answer them.

[pitt]

I have read this book 2 years ago and i really recommend it.

I bought it in Rio de Janeiro and at first i found the title putting me off and making me look like a loner (In portuguese, it kinda gives that message ''Como fazer amigos e Influenciar pessoas'')..The bookseller was telling me that the book was really good and that i was going to like it. After 15 mins of convo, i said fuck it, im buying it. One of the best books i have ever read. I liked the fact that Dale was saying that people are most concerned with their own, if you are seducing a woman, dont talk to her about what you have, how much you make, try to listen to her instead.Since i have started applying this strategy, i became a much more interesting person and the number of girls on my book gone up too.

Obviously the guy is not telling you to make a beta move and just sit there listening to all her problems, you have to know how to apply it.

[BortimusPrime]

(12-28-2010 12:33 AM)steezy Wrote:  

So, I bought the book and am reading it. But right now, I don't see how this can apply to pick up. For example, Principle #1 is Don't criticize, condemn, or complain. That whole chapter's message was, when angry, frustrated, etc., to take a step back and look upon the situation from the other person's POV, and not, under any circumstances, to criticize them.

That's pretty much the moral of this story:
http://gawker.com/5865681/

[pitt]

Also one thing that newbies dont understand..game skills is relationship skills. This is what the book is about.

[WestIndianArchie]

find the audio book somewhere.

D. Carnegie, Q - "What's everyone's favorite subject to talk about?"
A- THEMSELVES.

How you use it in the game?

Instead of supplying 90% of the conversation and asking open ended questions about some random subject and going from your stock stories and routines, you turn the topic to her - something she knows very well.

You can then know which direction to go with your rap.

[Giovonny]

One of my favorite types of intelligence is "social intelligence". Knowing how to socialize successfully. I get annoyed by academic types who think intellectual intelligence is the only or highest form form of intelligence. Social skills are big in life. Underrated.

[Phanes]

I have some issues with some of the advice.

For example he says to say "I believe X is best" ,"It appears to me that X is best" instead of "X is best". That makes you appear soft and weak.

Another one is to show honest appreciation and praise before criticising, I did this to a friend while we had a conflict but again it just made me loose power and he railroading me.

Finally avoid an argument at all cost he says. That makes the other person not know what your opinion is and messes up the relationship. It gives them too much power.

These three advice turns you into a nice guy.

[Phanes]

Ignore.

[rochdilol]

(04-17-2019 02:56 PM)Phanes Wrote:  

I have some issues with some of the advice.

For example he says to say "I believe X is best" ,"It appears to me that X is best" instead of "X is best". That makes you appear soft and weak.

Another one is to show honest appreciation and praise before criticising, I did this to a friend while we had a conflict but again it just made me loose power and he railroading me.

Finally avoid an argument at all cost he says. That makes the other person not know what your opinion is and messes up the relationship. It gives them too much power.

These three advice turns you into a nice guy.

Hello,

thread-18092.html

in this post there is a summary of the book and how can you relate any advise to your daily seduction routines

[rishboy77]

(04-20-2019 07:48 AM)rochdilol Wrote:  

(04-17-2019 02:56 PM)Phanes Wrote:  

I have some issues with some of the advice.

For example he says to say "I believe X is best" ,"It appears to me that X is best" instead of "X is best". That makes you appear soft and weak.

Another one is to show honest appreciation and praise before criticising, I did this to a friend while we had a conflict but again it just made me loose power and he railroading me.

Finally avoid an argument at all cost he says. That makes the other person not know what your opinion is and messes up the relationship. It gives them too much power.

These three advice turns you into a nice guy.

Hello,

thread-18092.html

in this post there is a summary of the book and how can you relate any advise to your daily seduction routines

If you want to read a better book....48 Laws of Power by Robert Greene.

I have read it twice..maybe if I have time I will do a separate thread on but here is good link to some quotes from the book.

https://www.nateliason.com/notes/48-laws...ert-greene

[whiteknightrises]

The book is called

"How to Win Friends and Influence People"

Not

"How to Fuck a Lot of Hoes"

[quaker13]

(12-09-2011 08:56 PM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:  

find the audio book somewhere.

D. Carnegie, Q - "What's everyone's favorite subject to talk about?"
A- THEMSELVES.

How you use it in the game?

Instead of supplying 90% of the conversation and asking open ended questions about some random subject and going from your stock stories and routines, you turn the topic to her - something she knows very well.

You can then know which direction to go with your rap.

There it is. End the post

[quaker13]

(04-17-2019 02:56 PM)Phanes Wrote:  

I have some issues with some of the advice.

For example he says to say "I believe X is best" ,"It appears to me that X is best" instead of "X is best". That makes you appear soft and weak.

Another one is to show honest appreciation and praise before criticising, I did this to a friend while we had a conflict but again it just made me loose power and he railroading me.

Finally avoid an argument at all cost he says. That makes the other person not know what your opinion is and messes up the relationship. It gives them too much power.

These three advice turns you into a nice guy.

In sales these little adjustments are absolutely critical. In regular social interactions it's not really a big deal.

[moonlight_sonata]

I don't think you need to look for 100% applicability. This is true with everything we learn. We have to tailor it. This book gives you advice on how to make friends and connections. These don't help your game directly but indirectly. They make you more powerful - the more friends you have, the more people you know the more powerful and social proof you are. Indirectly girls will pick on this and think you have very high status.

Make friends, build your network, make people like you and you'll optimize your chances.

[tough guy22]

You can't. This book is not about pick up.

[PapayaTapper]

^ How many friends do you have?

[Heuristics]

Been a while since I've read the book so hopefully I can remember it ok.

Bring value to the table. Show you're interesting, confident and not needy.

Show up at the social functions then slip out to head to other ones. Keep a busy schedule but only stay at one place 30 minutes or an hour. Use the irish goodbye if you have to... People get intrigued. I swear.

Look busy, when people talk about Mystery Method and old game methods, one thing utilized is the false time constraint. You look important, and show that you are high value (high value people in the US are always busy).. Social status in the US is determined by and large how busy you are.

Push/Pull dynamic-- This goes what I have already said, but you can be unreachable to prospects or friends for a few days, week, fortnight, and then swoop back in. This way, social interactions become more interesting and people automatically assume you are up to big things. It's a way to build dramatic tension I find.

I'm not sure if all these things were in the book, but friends of mine who are disciples of it do all these things, which I'm sure they got from the book.

Best of luck.

-H

edit: it certainly helps to think of you playing the lead-role in a TV show or movie, think of how the narrative arc is going to go, how you can inject drama into things, or do a surprise plot twist. One clear element of tv and good film, is not revealing everything about the main character to other characters... Stay mysterious. As patrick bateman says, "I have to return some video tapes."

[Hypno]

If you are looking for a book with a silver bullet or a shortcut, you are looking for the wrong thing. The starting point in Game is to improve yourself.

This book is very old, and the concepts are not that radical. Yet, it still has a lot of value, especially in game. You just need to be creative in how you apply it.

So principle 1 is don't criticize condemn or complain. As Mike Demone says in Fast Times at Ridgemont High, act like wherever you are is the best place. Hey, isn't this great?

Also, the more you can communicate that you are nonjudgmental, the more the other person will reveal about themselves. A slut isn't going to slut if she feels like she'll be judged.e

[Player_1337]

Get the girl to talk about her favorite topic-- herself.