[mattybrews]

New around here, and seeking advice on what my next move could be with a current prospect.

Vitals: 7.5-8, slim, a year older than me (26), pretty face, solid rack and ass. Diggin' it. (Can post pics FWIW)

Backstory: Going through some LTR breakup/on-again/off-again bullshit with her current man. Crazy as a fuckin' loon--a very pretty, attractive girl with deep insecurity, a shitty childhood, and daddy issues vivisble from space. I had actually been acquainted with her (years before) when I was smashing another girl in a shared social circle. My friend/wingman is currently banging one of her close friends, herself a solid 7.5 hispanic sweet thing. Seeing her friend going through a breakup, she decides to get her to come out for dinner with my Wing.

SUNDAY NIGHT: Wing hits me up saying he needs a quick response to fill up the foursome for dinner and drinks. I suit up and we head out.

Night goes well, build a comfortable a light vibe, light touching from the very outset, avoid saying any needy shit and just let the game come to me. Dinner is over and the two females 'excuse' themselves to the bathroom to discuss. I tell my wing that my best play is some good isolation and escalation. I offer wine and music (I've got a wicked vinyl collection) at my crib to the group. The bishes agree.

Spin some Barry White and Santana, get the vino pouring and the ladies dancing. My Wing and his squeeze are getting frisky. We get a sweet little dance party going and swap partners. A joint goes around. It's dope.

The ladies re-convene and my Wing's girl is doing everything in her power to get her friend home. TBH, the girl is not in good sorts--coughing all freakin' night with a bad smoker's cough, and alternating between upbeat in good company and totally depressed about her relationship coming to an end. But my target persists and says she wants to stay. My Wing and his squeeze go home to smash.

Iso, escalate. Let her talk and talk and talk, and she opens up on some deep emotional shit--sadness kind of stuff. I alternate between just listening and offering light emotional reassurance. There's a lull and our eyes lock. I go in for the kiss, she turns her cheek, gives me the "No... I..."

I back off without missing a beat, surprised but not hurt. Bring the convo back up, dance and drink some more. Get my hands on her body, lay her down, pretty good massage going, unhook her bra and rub her back. I didn't want to go overtly sexual, but Sensual. This continues and we're laying down again. Eyes locked, faces inches apart. Go for kiss second time. Another Deny. I had expected this one, not sure why I went for it, except to just go for it. She rambles about her ex a bit by way of explanation. No big deal. I get her off the couch and into my bed, its way late, we're both plastered. Get comfy next to her--physical touch not a problem at all, but she wouldn't cross over into sexual. Around 4am my Wing's squeeze calls her phone.

Squeeze: HEY. Are you ok?

Target: Yes. We're laying down.

Squeeze: I'm coming to get you.

Target: Ok...

They show up, I walk her out. Think I fucked up the number close.

Me: Hey, give me your phone.

She does. I type my number and call it, but the damn thing won't connect and an awkward beat goes by.

Her: I think it went through.

Me: Nah it's not connected...whatever, here ya go. Later. (it did, in fact, go through. i'm going to stop using this tactic, its fraught with logistical error)

Haven't done a thing since then. Gut told me to play it way cool and not scare away the cat. I know I came on way strong, and I'm OK with that, even if it cost me the bang. But I feel like tight game can bring this one back.

Thoughts?

[eradicator]

My thoughts are that group dates are fine when you are 14 but if you are a grown man, they are not a good idea.

So you have a blind dinner date with a chick you have not actually met,

You also have me mixed up about the 'target' and 'squeeze'. Which are you trying to bang?

You brought her back to your house but you didn't try to escalate because you thought you were coming on too strong?




If you didn't kiss her, you were not coming on strong enough.

Regardless, if you like her, try to set up another date with her(not another group date). You should at least be trying to kiss her but would be better to bang her.

The biggest problem in your story is that you seem to think it is a good idea to not go for the bang or escalate and in your words "play it cool". If you don't like her, don't contact her. If you like her, you need to escalate more.

[BadgerHut]

I'd get this chick out of your phone and go find a lower-maintenance slampiece.

"Going through some LTR breakup/on-again/off-again bullshit with her current man."

This is the point where I drop my effort to the most simple "I just got home from work, wanna come over" kind of booty-call game. A chick who is going on and off with an ex is making you a secondary option in case shit doesn't work out again with her main dude. While there is something to be said for being the new dick that snaps her out of it, that's best done in a SNL/quick-bang opportunity, not an organized seduction. I feel like a chump when I'm competing with some dude she's already fucked and may or may not be fucking her still.

"she opens up on some deep emotional shit--sadness kind of stuff"

This again is a sign you are being set up as an emotional buffer. You might have treated this as a shit test and headed off the emotional bloodletting. Then again this chick sounds crazy and between the ex and the past issues you're looking at an FRA or a beating from the ex or something else bad.

[mattybrews]

Thanks fellas.

I had it in my gut to take her out of my phone and just put it in the trash.

Instead, I texted her yesterday.

Me: Hey.

Her: Please don't contact me. I am involved. I don't need any distractions.

Blowout, indeed.

Foundational to Game is trusting your gut. Lesson learned.