I feel like giving some encouraging words so here it goes (lord knows I like encouragement). Perspective is key (esp. for perfectionists):
So I've be training in MMA for a while, getting good, but recently I was going through a rough patch. Most people who train go through these waves of doing good and then doing shitty, whether it be in competing or just in the gym. This rough patch, much to my chagrin, was affecting my confidence in other aspects of my life, namely women, and was lasting longer than my typical rough patches. So the other night, after many weeks of low confidence and shitty training sessions I decide to go out. Fuck it, I feel like shit but I just want a goddam rum and coke. At the bar I chat with a dude about working out. I suggest MMA training or at least one of its core disciplines (jiu-jitsu, muay thai etc). Says that he's too old for that (even though he's younger than me) and that he doesn't like the idea of getting hit in the face. Don't think much of it. The next night I go out and have almost the same conversation with a different guy, nearly word-for-word. And that's when Two things hit me:
1.)EFFORT: I realized I was far ahead of most guys, not b/c of some god given talent, but merely b/c I tried. Simply TRYING in this day and age will put you far ahead of the pack. Most guys will never even try to push their boundaries or confront their fears.
2.) Perspective: My lack of confidence was because I was comparing myself to better fighters than myself, but in the scheme of things, I was still ahead of most guys. Maybe not the guys I'm training with, but most. I hate that people are better than me, and I let it eat at me even if one person on this planet is better than me (even though many are), but at some point you got to sit back and look at the bigger picture. Yes I'm not the best, but compared to most, I'm doing very well. I still have a ways to go, but it helps to take the time to see how far I've come.
When you start becoming a winner, you start being surrounded by other winners, some that will outshine you. You create a bubble around you and all you see is winners, and you can get down on yourself easily and succumb to self doubt.. While I definitely encourage you to stay around these people, it's important to take a look at the grand scheme sometimes, and how far you've come as an individual, so as to keep perspective, not get too down on yourself, and to keep on chugging forward.
Not sure how to end this properly but from my experience the journey to becoming a better you is simply a matter a of trying and keeping perspective when you hit rough patches. Hope this helps.
PS after this revelation I started kicking ass in the gym again. Must of opened up some mental block.
So I've be training in MMA for a while, getting good, but recently I was going through a rough patch. Most people who train go through these waves of doing good and then doing shitty, whether it be in competing or just in the gym. This rough patch, much to my chagrin, was affecting my confidence in other aspects of my life, namely women, and was lasting longer than my typical rough patches. So the other night, after many weeks of low confidence and shitty training sessions I decide to go out. Fuck it, I feel like shit but I just want a goddam rum and coke. At the bar I chat with a dude about working out. I suggest MMA training or at least one of its core disciplines (jiu-jitsu, muay thai etc). Says that he's too old for that (even though he's younger than me) and that he doesn't like the idea of getting hit in the face. Don't think much of it. The next night I go out and have almost the same conversation with a different guy, nearly word-for-word. And that's when Two things hit me:
1.)EFFORT: I realized I was far ahead of most guys, not b/c of some god given talent, but merely b/c I tried. Simply TRYING in this day and age will put you far ahead of the pack. Most guys will never even try to push their boundaries or confront their fears.
2.) Perspective: My lack of confidence was because I was comparing myself to better fighters than myself, but in the scheme of things, I was still ahead of most guys. Maybe not the guys I'm training with, but most. I hate that people are better than me, and I let it eat at me even if one person on this planet is better than me (even though many are), but at some point you got to sit back and look at the bigger picture. Yes I'm not the best, but compared to most, I'm doing very well. I still have a ways to go, but it helps to take the time to see how far I've come.
When you start becoming a winner, you start being surrounded by other winners, some that will outshine you. You create a bubble around you and all you see is winners, and you can get down on yourself easily and succumb to self doubt.. While I definitely encourage you to stay around these people, it's important to take a look at the grand scheme sometimes, and how far you've come as an individual, so as to keep perspective, not get too down on yourself, and to keep on chugging forward.
Not sure how to end this properly but from my experience the journey to becoming a better you is simply a matter a of trying and keeping perspective when you hit rough patches. Hope this helps.
PS after this revelation I started kicking ass in the gym again. Must of opened up some mental block.
Civilize the mind but make savage the body.